Archive of Our Own

r/friendships · Posted by u/j.one 2 hours ago.

idk if my friend and his husband are tired of me

Friendships

I (23M) have recently been spending a lot of time with my friend (25M) and his husband (26M). I think my friend's husband is on reddit, so we'll call them Minnow and Char respectively. We're part of the same friend group, made up of some other guys we used to work with under the same company— until a few of us moved on to other things. We all get together somewhat regularly to watch movies, drink, and just hangout. This happens maybe once a month or so, always at Minnow and Char's house. Recently, Minnow and I have been bonding over a shared love for anime and collecting gacha figures. We made plans to shop for them together, and Char asked if he could come along. The three of us had a lot of fun together, and they bought me lunch before we took it back to their house to hangout for a while. I ended up staying until around 11pm, which isn't unusual when we're hanging out with the other guys, but I was a bit stressed about staying so late since it was just me. The next weekend, I came over to watch a three-movie series that Minnow is obsessed with. Again, they bought me lunch and we spent hours just talking and hanging out together. I ended up showing them some of the music I've written and produced, and they were super impressed. I was pretty embarrassed about it but I am proud of my work, so it was cool that they were so supportive. Anyway, I left pretty late again and Char said we would find time to watch an anime that Minnow isn't really interested in, and force him to enjoy it with us. The next day, Minnow texted me and said they stayed up another thirty minutes after I'd gone home, just talking about how great my work was and how impressed and in awe they were of it. I felt so giddy hearing that!! It seems like they've been having as much fun with me as I have with them, but I still worry that they may grow tired of me, or that I'm bothering them by staying over so late. After all, don't married couples want some alone time? I guess I'm just looking for some kind of validation, or at least any suggestions for what I should do. I'm pretty socially awkward and I tend to miss social cues, but I don't think I've been too annoying since they keep inviting me back? How many times is too many to hang out with someone in a single month? I've spent every weekend so far this month hanging out with my friend and his husband (although the first time was with other friends, too). I don't want them to grow tired of me.

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r/amitheasshole · Posted by u/j.one 3 hours ago.

AITAH for letting my friends pay for everything?

AmITheAsshole

I (23M) have recently been spending a lot of time with my friend (25M) and his husband (26M). We usually go out to do something, grab lunch and take it home, or just hangout and go out to grab lunch when we get hungry. My friend's husband always drives us around, which means he's always the one ordering at the drive through. They never even give me the chance to offer to pay for anything. Honestly part of me is grateful for it, as I just work a low pay retail job and they both make a bit more than I do. I'm not exactly sure what my friend's husband does but it's like a CAREER job, so it pays well enough. Even so, I know I should probably be trying harder to pay for my share, at least. It's just nice to have someone buy me a meal when I usually skip them at home to afford rent T_T It's not only food, though. We recently attended a small scale anime event and were looking at some art at a booth when my friend's husband just bought me something totally unprompted. My friend and I were admiring these little bookmarks, so he bought one for each of us. I had put mine down and turned away, so I had no idea he'd gone and purchased it. It was really cheap, but the act was still surprising and honestly kind of heartwarming? I hadn't even expressed wanting it, it had just been pretty cute… I was shocked, but they both just kind of laughed at my disbelief, like it was unnecessary. I still feel bad, though. They're always paying for me. I don't want to take advantage of their generosity.

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r/cats · Posted by u/j.one 1 hour ago.

bizarre cat behavior (not my cat)

Cats

So I was over at my friend's and his husband's house the other night watching a 3-hour gaylor swift conspiracy video (don't ask) when one of their three cats came and snuggled down into my lap. This is pretty normal behavior from their cuddly maknae and their talkative second-born, but this one is kind of a cranky old man. He kind of tolerates other people, but doesn't really like being affectionate towards anyone other than his parents. Even then, he kind of just lets himself be pet a little before trotting away to watch from afar. I don't know why he did this, but he jumped up into my lap and bumped his head against my hand before lying down and allowing me to pet him for a few minutes. Suddenly, he stood up and licked my hand, then walked over to my friend and licked his hand, and then continued on to my friend's husband to lick his before settling in his lap to sleep. We were all pretty surprised and they both kind of laughed in disbelief. It was so strange! I almost wanted to cry though. It felt like I'd been welcomed into the house TwT

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r/friendship · Posted by u/j.one 1 hour ago.

Is it normal to feel this way?

Friendship

Hi everyone, I recently posted to this reddit talking about my insecurities surrounding my friendship with my friend Minnow (25M) and his husband Char (26M). Things have been really good lately. I took some of the advice I was given and decided to bring up my worries– while Minnow was in the restroom, I told his husband Char that I'd been feeling stressed after hanging out with them, and he looked totally distraught. It made me laugh but I was quick to explain that it wasn't them, but my own anxiety. I've been having so much fun but I needed to know when to leave their house so I wouldn't bother them or overstay my welcome. Char told me the time they usually go to bed, but also explained that I was always welcome to stay the night if I wanted. He and Minnow have both said so before, and have even offered a place at their dinner table for me, even though I work evening shifts and don't get off until late at night. They've also said that if I ever need a place to stay, I have their guest room. I feel so cared for by them. I always have fun no matter what we're doing, but I really love snuggling into their couch to watch things with them, especially when their cats join us. Honestly it would be so cool to live with them, but I don't know if they were serious about me even borrowing the guest room. I don't want to intrude on their marriage more than I already have. I'm really grateful to call the both of them my friends. I just sometimes wish I didn't have to be apart from them so much.

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r/relationships · Posted by u/j.one 1 hour ago.

I think I may have feelings for my friend and his husband

Relationships

So I didn't really plan on posting here, but people thought my last post in the r/friendships subreddit was "better suited" for this one. At first, I was annoyed, but then I started thinking about everything and honestly… I think everyone is right. I (23M) have been spending a lot of time with my friend (25M) and his husband (26M) and I think I'm falling for both of them. I never imagined being in this kind of position. I never saw myself as being polyamorous (?) but I think I could make an exception for them. The only thing is, I don't think they feel the same way. Maybe they do want to fuck me, as one commenter has been so adamant about… but I don't believe they could want more than that. They both have a life together, one they've been working towards for the past 10 years (because of course they were high school sweethearts). They have a house, and good jobs, and three beautiful little cat babies together. I don't have anything to offer them besides my body, and I don't think I could handle the possibility they would accept everything but my heart.

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r/relationships · Posted by u/j.one just now.

my married friends' cats dragged me into a poly relationship

Relationships