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The party is in Mike’s basement for their usual Sunday Night movie marathon, their pick for this time being Bambi.
“Oh no! Bambi just fell on the ice, poor thing,” El says in a sad tone.
“Hey, just like Wheeler! All limbs and no coordination,” Max laughs, throwing a cold popcorn in her mouth.
“What is with you and insulting me, Max? I didn’t even do anything this time!” Mike shouts, offended.
“You are no fun,” she retorts.
“Oh my God, look! Isn’t Thumper the cutest thing ever?” El says.
“He so is. Doesn’t he remind you guys of Will in bunny form?” Dustin asks.
Mike can see Will shifting in his seat, blush spreading across his cheeks.
“He does look remarkably like him,” Lucas agrees.
Indeed, Mike thinks.
He’s ashamed to even think about this, but he has found himself thinking about Bunny Will many times since that whole thing with the crazy mages happened.
Is he crazy for missing his boyfriend in bunny form?
I mean, probably.
But also, can anyone actually blame him?
His mind starts to drift off, remembering his boyfriend’s cute tiny paws, his little pink nose, his fluffy tail, and how little he looked in his hands.
“Mike? You there, buddy?”
Mike turns his head towards Lucas, looking guilty,
“Yeah- sorry. I, uhm,” he stutters. “I agree, yeah. Thumper definitely looks like Will.”
Will smiles softly at him, taking his hand and intertwining their fingers.
“I love you,” he whispers, just for Mike.
“I love you too,” he whispers back.
TocTocToc
Everyone in the room snaps their head towards the sound, startled.
A little grey bird is pecking the basement’s window, holding a yellowish letter in his beak.
“Oh, cool. Someone sent us a pigeon!” Dustin notices, wiggling his eyebrows.
“What the hell, sure,” Max says, raising her hands to the sky in exasperation.
Lucas gets up from the floor to let the little pigeon in. He carefully takes the letter from his beak, watching as the tiny bird flies away.
“What does it say?” El inquires, curious.
Lucas opens the envelope, and it’s immediately met with a series of sparks and gleams. Trumpet sounds fill the room, and an oddly familiar voice announces “We are delighted to invite you to the event of the week at Ominous Castle, for the very first edition of Cold Soup Sunday!”
They all look at each other with very confused faces, not really understanding what the hell just happened.
“Is it possible that…”
“No, it can’t, please-”
“But the voice!”
“The crazy mages-”
“This definitely did sound like the one with the peculiar accent-”
“Everybody, stay calm!” Mike shouts. “This is not real, okay? It can’t be, I haven't even written another campaign…”
“EXCUSE ME, this is very real!” the voice from the envelope retorts.
Mike jumps in his seat, falling to the floor.
“Told ya, no coordination.”
“Screw you, Max-”
“Guys!” Lucas erupts. “Stop fighting. We have to understand what this means… how would the crazy mages know where to find us? How are they even able to send us pigeons, or even-”
“Lucas, please, stop trying to make sense of it. Over-analysing every little thing just ruins the fun of it!” Dusint interrupts.
“Bro, let me cornplate in peace.”
“Uhm, guys…” Will starts, watches as a beam of lights flashes from the envelope. “I don’t think we’re gonna have much of a choi-”
Every lamp in the basement starts flickering, and before anyone could even utter another word, they feel their bodies go numb as the lights completely blind their vision.
⏔𝑩⏔𝒖⏔𝒏⏔𝒏⏔𝒚⏔₊⊹ᰔᩚִֶָ🐇་ᰔᩚ⊹₊⏔𝑩⏔𝒖⏔𝒏⏔𝒏⏔𝒚⏔
A light, pink hole tears through the sky, revealing the party.
They all fall to the ground with loud thuds, groaning.
“Why did we fall from the sky this time? At least when El transported us it was gracious…” Max says while caressing her own head to soothe the pain.
“I guess these crazy mages don’t really care if we get hurt,” Lucas says, getting up.
Will is standing perfectly still on the grass, curiously watching his friends.
“I didn’t fall,” he says.
“Of course you didn’t,” Dustin sassily remarks.
They take a quick look around, recognizing the field where bunny Will started levitating in the air.
“Good, at least this time we won’t have to walk. We’re already at the mages’ cabin,” El says happily.
“Didn’t the invite talk about a Castle, tho?” Mike asks, walking towards Will. He takes his hand, sweetly looking at him- wishing nothing but to just be close.
Will melts on the spot, smiling back at him.
“Shoot, you’re right,” El says. “Do you think it’s far?”
“I really have no idea. I certainly didn’t write it in my campaign,” Mike replies. “We can walk a bit and see if we spot it? I’m sure it’s not gonna be that diff-”
He cuts himself off at the sound of ruffling leaves coming from the bushes.
They all still, looking at one another with eyebrows raised, ready to fight.
El raises her hand, starting to focus to gather her power, while Lucas takes his slingshot from his pocket.
Mike takes a step in front of Will, keeping him behind with his arm.
“Who’s there?” Dustin asks.
The ruffling comes to a stop, and everyone freezes, prepared to jump.
Max cracks her knuckles, swallowing non-existent saliva. “Everybody, we act on three, okay? One… two… thre-”
“HELLLLLLOOOOOOOO!” A squeaky voice shouts, coming out from their hiding.
“What the-”
“I’m Alvin!”
“I’m Simon!”
“And I’m Theodore! And together, we’re… THE CHIPMUNKS!”
Everyone in the party stares at the three squirrels in front of them, utterly flabbergasted.
“You’re… chipmunks?” Mike asks.
“Indeed we are, my weird- looking friends!” the taller squirrel replies, adjusting his glasses.
“We hear you’re looking for the Ominous Castle. We’d be honoured to show you the road! It’s so lovely to help people, no one knows this place like we do,” the cute, chubby one adds.
“Oh, uhm. Thank you?” Will says with a confused look.
“Of course! It’s not too difficult to reach the destination that you seek,” Alvin says. “It’s right after Funky Town, so you just gotta make a move to a town that's right for you!”
As if on cue, The Chipmunks all gather together in formation and start moving and grooving, before bursting into song, belting.
Gotta make a move to a town that's right for me
Town to keep me movin'
Keep me groovin' with some energy
Well, I talk about it, talk about it
Talk about it, talk about it
Talk about, talk about
Talk about movin'
Gotta move on
Gotta move on
Gotta move on
Won't you take me to Funkytown?
They finish the song doing jazzhands. The party claps hesitantly, looking amongst each other.
“Uh…Nice song!” Dustin says. “Thank you, friends!”
“Friends? No thanks,” Alvin exclaims. “Best friends!”
Mike freezes and looks towards Will, who’s looking at him as if he was a demogorgon at the Mac-Z about to get snapped in half, and not in the good way.
They salute their new best friends, and start their stroll towards the castle.
After following the Yellow Brick Road, the enormous and beautiful Ominous Castle comes into view.
They walk on the wooden bridge, surpassing the crocodiles and sharks in the moat. They arrive at the big front door, knocking on it.
It opens immediately, and they are met with a tall, blond and quirky looking man.
“Hello there! I’m AJJ, the Castle’s keeper. How can I assist you?” the man asks with a British accent.
“Hi, we’ve been invited here by the two crazy mages, Clarke and Lexi,” Dustin says.
“Oh, yes! Madam’s girlfriends. Follow me,” AJJ says.
They follow them through the long and dark corridors, looking around and watching the paintings hung on the walls. The paintings show different people, most with huge red X’s over them.
“Who’s the people in the paintings?” Mike asks, looking towards AJJ.
“Fake ass hoes,” he replies quickly, snapping his finger cuntily.
They finish their walk and arrive at the Ball Room, where a magnificent black throne, covered in swords sits in the centre.
Just like there.
In the middle.
“That’s not uncomfortable at all,” Lucas points out.
“OH MY GOD, GUYS! You came!” Lexi exclaims as she spots the party.
“WIWWIWWIWWIWWIW” Clarke adds, running towards Will, throwing her arms at him.
“Why would a man be there?” a random woman asks from the corner.
“Sorry, that’s just Katie. Don’t mind her,” Lexi explains. ”She’s our pigeon sender, she hates men.”
“Pigeon sender?” Dustin asks, confused. “'The hell is that?”
“Well, dumbass, I send pigeons,” Katie snaps. “Fucking idiot.”
“Damn, my bad,” Dustin says, putting his hands in the air.
The doors to the Ball Room snap open, and an ominous babe appears.
“Hello, new guests. Welcome to my fortress,” a dirty blonde, sexy woman says flirtatiously. “I am Julie, and you already seemed to have met Katie, so let me present you to her girlfriend, Mynna the Good.”
Julie motions her head in the direction of a cute girl, wearing a pink glittery gown- a wand in her hand.
“Whereas there, fighting in the corner, are Dom and Eris,” she says, pointing her finger.
The pair turns their head in the direction of the party, stopping their quarrel to approach them.
“Hi, I’m Eris the Wicked,” the brunette says.
“Widzę w twojej przyszłości część trzecią,” Dom the fortune teller says.
They all look at the girl in confusion, not having understood a single fuck of what she just said.
“Excuse me?” Max asks, raising her eyebrows.
“Did she just call me a slur?” Mike says. “That’s homophobic.”
“Don’t mind Dom, she just doesn’t like talking to people, so she resorts to this. Eris is the only one that can understand her, for some reason,” Julie explains.
“Plot convenience?” Lucas asks.
“Sure.”
“My sister just another me for real,” Max says, bumping Dom’ fist.
Dom doesn’t bump it back.
“Okay! I think it’s all set,” Clarke intervenes.
“Do you want the Castle Tour?” Julie asks, wiggling her eyebrows and biting her finger.
They all nod frantically, afraid that she might kill them if they say no to her proposal.
They stroll through the hallways of the Castle, amazed by everything that surrounds them.
They surpass a room filled with chains, from which a series of eerie sounds and screeches come.
“Is that a demogorgon in a cage?” El asks.
“What the fuck is a demogorgon doing here,” Mike asks.
“I think we’re losing the plot here, guys,” Will notices.
AJJ calls for them, “Madam, the performance is about to start. I already told the waiters to come out with the soups.”
“COME OUT? WHERE?”
“Or me!”
“Or me!”
“What the hell-”
“We’re not enough people here,” Will sighs. “Hopper missed it again.”
“Where is he anyway?”
“I don’t know, El still hasn’t found him,” Mike shrugs.
“He’s literally meat dust,” Dustin says. “He went kaboom, kablaow.”
Everyone looks towards him in shock, but then moves on quickly. Nobody gaf about Hopper.
“I think he’s alive, actually,” Eris says.
Everyone ignores her comment.
They move to where the performance is being held, sitting down at the large table in the middle. A young man, with incredible hair and bottom energy stands on the stage singing.
“Wow, he’s really good!” El says.
“Bro, that’s literally just Steve,” Dustin says.
“What? No it’s not,” Max replies, looking back at the young, gay man.
“You seriously don’t see the resemblance?” Dustin asks, looking at everyone.
“No,” Max says.
“Not at all,” Lucas agrees with her.
“Did Vecna get your ass?” Mike asks.
“Oh my God,” Dustin groans. “Commit suicide.”
The performance ends, everyone claps at the young man as he bows and leaves the stage.
Lexi rolls her eyes, "He was fine, I guess. But I prefer when Clarke sings Imagine," she says, taking her lover's hand.
Clarke smiles at her, starting to belt.
YOU MAAAY SAAAAAAY I'M A DREAMERRRRRRRR.
They all look at each other extremely confused, for what feels like the thousandth time this evening. They move to the table, everyone sitting down but Mike, who’s walking towards the crystal cabinet in the corner of the room. “What’s all this stuff?” he inquires.
“That’s my personal collection of potions,” Clarke responds. “Stay away from it.”
He raises his hands with his palms open towards her in defeat. “Wasn’t planning on doing anything,” he lies.
The moments the mage turns around, he immediately launches towards the cabinet, snooping through all the trinkets.
He reads all the various labels displayed on the ampoules, trying to find one that might read ‘Bunny’.
He spots it after a while, and hides it in his pocket with a malicious grin.
Mike joins the rest of them at the table, sitting besides Will. He nudges his thigh under the table, forcing Will to look over at him.
“Look what I found,” he whispers, showing the small potion to Will under the tablecloth.
“Mike!” Will whisper-shouts. “Is that a bunny potion?”
“Yes,” Mike grins. “Maybe it’s stupid, but I was thinking…”
“You want me to become a bunny again?” Will asks. “Kinky,” he adds jokingly.
“What?” Mike chokes. “No! You were just so cute, and I loved being able to hold you in my hands,” he continues. “I liked protecting you.”
Will blushes all the way up to his ears. “Hand it over, idiot.”
Mike gives him the potion and Will immediately opens the lid and takes a sip.
A kaleidoscope of lights shimmers through the room, just like it did in the basement last time. Will disappears into the glow with a swoop. The light fades and there, on the floor, is the same tiny bunny. Bunny Will.
Mike runs over, quickly scooping Will up in his hands and bringing him up to his face to look into his big bunny eyes.
“Will, are you okay?” He asks nervously. He knows Will was fine the last time, but this transformation is new and he needs to make sure.
Will scrunches his bunny nose before shuffling to the edge of Mike’s palm, gesturing with a paw for Mike to come closer. Mike brings his face down closer. Will nuzzles his bunny snout into Mike’s nose, rubbing it against him, silently saying I’m okay.
Mike nuzzles back into Will, turning feverishly red at the exchange. Will is so cute and Mike knows he can’t speak and has to communicate in other ways, but the closeness makes him so flustered. It’s not just a bunny, it’s Will as a bunny and the thought of someday touching noses with Will in human form makes Mike blush all over.
He slowly places Will back on the floor, trying to collect himself.
“SOOOOOUUUUUUUUP!” Clarke comes hooting and hollering. “IT’S HERE!”
Mike flinches and Will makes a big jump on his small bunny legs.
“He’s so tiny!” El exclaims. “What if he gets lost?”
“I have an idea,” Mike says, bringing Will to the front of his shirt, where a small pocket sits. Will immediately understands, raising himself on his backpaws so Mike can grab him and plop him into his shirt pocket.
“You’ll be safe here, bunny,” Mike whispers to Will.
“That’s so fucking gay,” Max mutters under her breath.
Mike doesn’t care, he thinks Will is the cutest thing in the entire world. His floppy ears, the tiny bunny feet, the little fluffy tail. His favorite part though, is Will’s big bunny eyes. They look exactly the same as normal. Mike realizes they’re not different at all, even in bunny form. He’s always loved Will’s eyes. Maybe it is a little gay.
The party and the mages all move to the table, sitting around it, Mike bringing Will with him in his hand and placing him on the table beside himself. They scoop up the soup into their bowls, there’s no steam coming from it. Mike digs in, bringing the spoon to his lips.
“It’s cold?” He says confused, flinching at the cold liquid.
“Yes, it’s cold soup Sunday," Mynna says politely while Lexi rolls her eyes.
“Oh,” Mike says, shivering. He quickly shrugs on a hoodie. He looks towards Will, who’s standing on his hind legs with his whole bunny face into the bowl, slurping up the soup.
“Wait, hold on, Will.” Mike says.
He grabs Max’s scrunchie off her wrist and gently ties it around Will’s soft bunny ears. “There you go.”
Will scrunches his nose in a thank you before diving into the soup again, this time without his floppy ears in the way. He quickly finishes the soup with almost his whole body into the bowl. He stretches on his little bunny feet and in a swoop, falls into the bowl.
“You sleepy?” Mike asks quietly, leaning towards the bowl where Will sits. Will nods his little head, the scrunchie coming undone around his ears.
“Come here,” Mike mumbles and brings his hand forward for Will to climb onto. Mike gently places him into the pocket of his hoodie. “You can take a nap, bunny.”
After everyone is done eating their cold soup, the party and the mages move to the living room, sitting down together on the different couches and chairs. Will wakes up from the movement, shuffling in the pocket of Mike’s hoodie.
“You want out?” Mike asks, bringing his hand down to him and Will crawls out of the pocket and into his palm.
El comes over, making grabby hands at Will.
“Okay, my turn to have him!” she says excitedly, reaching for the bunny. Mike quickly brings Will to his chest and out of her reach.
“No!” he blurts out. “He’s my bunny.”
El flinches back, looking startled and a little amused by the sudden outburst.
“This is the greed they talk about in the bible,” Max mutters from her chair.
“Wait, you’ve read ‘The Secrets That You Keep’, too?” Julie exclaims from beside her.
“What the hell, sure,” Max sighs, putting her head in her hands.
“I particularly enjoyed the representation of bottom Hopper in the sequel,” Julie continues. “But sad that we never found out who topped him.”
“I agree,” Dustin chimes in. “But my favorite part was when the Mileven kiss transfer-”
“You’re a Mileven?!” Julie interrupts looking as shocked as ever.
“I am NOT a Mileven,” Dustin argues. “I don’t want that hetslop in my yaoi salad.”
“You’re literally straight,” Lucas sighs.
“As a ruler,” Dustin winks at him.
“Whatever, I’m just glad Paul got slimed,” Clarke chimes in.
“Heh, slimy head.” Julie mutters under her breath.
“Shut the fuck up,” Dom says, in english for the first time ever. “Fucking idiot.”
The doors burst open, revealing a devilish girl with black hair, a red cloak coating her figure.
“Having dinner without me, I see,” the witch says.
“Cee?!” Lexi exclaims. “What are you doing here? STAY AWAY FROM HER!” She shouts as she grabs Clarke, protecting her.
“Relax, I’m not here to ruin your stupid soup party,” Cee says. “I just wanted to see Clarke again. I have the most insane cuteness aggression towards her,” she explains.
“Tell me about it,” Mike agrees, petting bunny Will.
“Cee… babe,” Clarke says, freeing herself from Lexi’s grip. “I missed you so much.”
“The fuck?” Lexi exclaims.
“She’s not as evil as everyone thinks,” Clarke explains. “She’s just misunderstood.”
“My liege… you understand me. Better than anybody else,” the misunderstood witch says with a soft stare. “I always knew we were gonna be endgame. CEELARKE WINS GATE!” she exclaims, hugging her beloved.
“So… can I have Lexi back all to myself now?” Julie tries.
“I don’t care, bruh.” the witch responds.
“Cool.”
⏔𝑩⏔𝒖⏔𝒏⏔𝒏⏔𝒚⏔₊⊹ᰔᩚִֶָ🐇་ᰔᩚ⊹₊⏔𝑩⏔𝒖⏔𝒏⏔𝒏⏔𝒚⏔
After talking with the mages for a couple hours, the party is finally ready to head home. They start gathering their stuff, Mike picking up Will in his hands.
“Mike, don’t you think you’re forgetting something?” Max asks him, one brow raised.
“What do you mean?” he replies, looking around to see what he could be forgetting.
Max points to his hands, where Will is nuzzled into his palm. Oh, right.
“Right, of course,” Mike says, a little disappointed. Bunny Will is just too cute, even though he does miss the real Will.
“So, about that reverse potion,” He says and looks towards the mages.
“Oh! Yes!” Clarke exclaims as she gets up from her seat and walks towards the cabinet, where Mike found the bunny potion. She roams around, throwing different stuff out of it. At some point Mike swears he sees a whole collection of some sort of big-headed figure called ‘Bun-ko Hop’.
“Leaping lizards!” she yells as she turns around with a potion in her hands. “It’s expired!”
“What?” Mike bursts out.
“It’s fine,” Lexi urges. “I’ve drank multiple expired potions before and I was perfectly good!”
“I said oh I’m sure,” Julie says.
“She was fine, except The Incident,” Clarke mutters under her breath.
“Don’t mention that, cunt,” Lexi snaps. “It’s completely safe.” She finally says, handing the potion to Mike, who takes it in his hand.
He inspects it, turning it around to see the date.
Expiration: 22/03-1985
“Mike, if Lexi says it’s fine, I’m sure it’ll be okay,” El assures him.
“I’ll test it,” he finally says. “It’s just an antidote potion, I can try it before Will.”
The mages look amongst each other, snickering a bit. “Right, of course, do that.”
Mike gently places Will on the table in front of him and twists open the cap. Will stomps on the table, his nose scrunching in worry.
“It’s okay, Will,” Mike says, crouching down so he can look into his big bunny eyes. “I’d do anything for you, you know?”
Will stops stomping and for a second Mike swears he can see him blushing. He didn’t even know bunnies could blush.
He stands up and brings the potion to his lips, taking a tiny sip. It tastes weird, like cherry and something bitter. He places the bottle on the table besides Will. For a second he just stands there, waiting for something to happen. A minute passes, everyone looking at him with expectant eyes.
“Huh,” Mike blurts. “I guess it really is fi-”
A huge beam of green light flashes through the room and blinds everyone, Mike’s voice disappearing into it.
“What the hell?” Dustin exclaims as they all turn back around.
Mike is gone.
“Where’d he go?” Lucas asks as they all run towards where Mike just stood.
“WOOF!”
“Who the fuck just barked?” Max asks.
They all look towards the sound. There, on the floor beneath the table, sits a frog. It blinks one eye at a time, looking awfully confused.
“Oh my God,” El exclaims, trying to hide her giggles with her hand. “Mike’s a frog!”
“Frogface!” Max bursts out in a laugh.
“WOOF! WOOF!” the frog, Mike, barks out.
“A barking frog?” Lucas asks, looking towards the mages. “BARK ON MY WHEELER, BABY!”
“I told you it was expired,” Clarke says to Lexi who just shrugs carelessly.
“Someone grab him,” Dustin says.
“Ew no!” Max exclaims. “I don’t wanna touch his slimy head.”
El lets out a big sigh and bends down to grab Mike, putting him on the table besides Will, who’s still in bunny form.
“Will is so cute, and then there’s Mike,” El giggles.
“It’s just like ‘The Princess and The Frog’,” Max laughs.
The bunny shyly hops over to the frog, letting his ear flop over its slimy body. The frog blinks owlishly before letting itself relax into the bunny’s fur.
“They’re just as weird in this form as they usually are,” Max groans.
“New Byler variant just dropped,” Lucas says, looking at the odd pair on the table.
“What the fuck does that mean?” Dustin asks.
“It’s up to interpretation.”