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“NO!”
McCree sat up quickly in bed, heart pounding rapidly, body slightly shaking. It took a minute before his heartbeat began to slow and his vision adjusted to the darkness. He pushed his hair back, shaky hands tried to wipe the sweat off his face. He threw the covers to the side, they were suffocating and he felt overheated. Fuck, another nightmare… McCree thought, cradling his face in his hands. He glanced over at the clock on his nightstand, it’s glaring red numbers reading 2:36 AM.
He needed some fresh air, maybe a smoke or two, if he ever wanted to get back to sleep. He rose from the bed and walked over to his drawers, grabbing whatever he could to get dressed, didn’t even matter what it was. He needed to get outside, his room felt too stuffy and he felt like something was watching his every move. Once done, he grabbed his holster and Peacekeeper before leaving his room and heading for the elevator. Just one night of peace would be nice for a change… he thought, yawning.
It didn’t take long for him to reach the walkway and he headed straight for his favorite place to go on nights like this. He climbed the stairs only to freeze mid-step when he reached the top. A certain archer leaned over the balcony railing and had already beaten him to the spot. It was strange seeing him up so late and even more so with his hair down. McCree felt he should go somewhere else, but before he could leave Hanzo spoke.
“Leaving so soon, gunslinger?”
“Oh, uh, so you knew I was here?” McCree stammered.
“Hm, of course. I may be relaxing, but that doesn’t mean I’m not on guard and aware of my surroundings,” Hanzo replied. “Besides, you have your gun with you as a precaution, yes?”
“Okay, fair point.”
“What’s keeping you up at this hour?” Hanzo asked, gesturing McCree join him.
“Well, I was asleep, but I was woken up,” McCree answered, leaning against the railing next to Hanzo.
“If I may ask, what woke you? Was Hana doing one of her streams?”
“Nah, she usually warns us ahead of time when she’s gonna have one. Also, it’s nothing big, just a nightmare.”
“Of?”
“Heh, you ain’t the only one who’s done some questionable things in the past, archer. We all have our demons.”
“I see, I am sorry for prying…” Hanzo apologized.
“Nah, it’s fine. I don’t mind, even if you’re still kinda new here. Something like this was eventually gonna happen,” McCree reassured.
“Why is that?”
“This is something that happens often, though it’s been happening more since the recall. Being back here brings back so many memories, good and bad. It’s only natural my night terrors occur more.”
“I’m sorry to hear you’ve been experiencing this the past few months. Perhaps it will become more bearable as more time passes.”
“I hope so,” McCree agreed. “What about you? What’s keeping you up so late?”
“As you said, we all have our demons, and mine are restless tonight.”
“Sorry to hear that…”
Their conversation was replaced with silence, the only sounds the occasional splash of waves at the bottom of the cliff and the small whistle of the wind. Despite being up because for unfavorable reasons, the night was peaceful. McCree couldn’t help steal a glance at Hanzo. He really was different than usual, seemed less distant and willing to interact, but he also looked tired. Not the sleep deprived kind, but the type where, one false move and he could break down. Maybe McCree was just overthinking things, but he could read the archer clearer than he ever could, even relate to him. An urge overcame him of wanting to hold him and tell him everything was going to be okay.
Sure Jesse, and while you’re at it, why not just flat out admit you have feelings for him? Jesus, get yourself together! McCree scolded himself. Wait, maybe I could- Beside him, he heard a faint chuckle. He looked over at Hanzo to find a smirk on his face as he stared up at him.
“What’s so funny?” McCree wondered.
“You are,” Hanzo replied.
“And why’s that?”
“You were making strange faces for no reason just now. It was quite entertaining,” Hanzo snickered. “More importantly though, do you happen to know what time it is?”
“Sure, hold on a sec,” McCree said and pulled out his phone. “It’s 3:23 am.”
“Hm, it’s quite late. I suppose I should go back to my quarters and attempt to sleep,” Hanzo sighed. “Well, good night gunslinger. I’ll see you tomorrow-”
“Whoa! Uh, actually, I wanted to ask ya something, Han,” McCree sputtered.
“Han?”
“Oh shit, sorry, didn’t mean to-”
“No, it’s quite all right. What did you want to ask?”
“Well, I heard somewhere that sometimes people sleep better if they have someone close by, and we’ve both had trouble sleeping tonight so-”
“You want us to sleep together?” Hanzo finished.
“Yeah! Wait, but not as in like, the sex kind of sleeping together, I mean-”
“It’s quite fine, I understand what you mean and I accept. Especially if it’ll stop you from making an even bigger fool of yourself,” Hanzo laughed.
McCree shut his mouth and gave Hanzo an awkward smile before leading the way to his room. Everything was fine until it came to actually getting in bed. They both laid down uncomfortably, but eventually their sleep deprivation got the best of them both. The rest of the night was peaceful and neither of them was disturbed again, unlike previous nights like this. It wasn’t until small rays of light poked through the slits of the window blinds that one of them was finally awoken.
McCree yawned and tried to blink the sleepiness from his eyes. He tried to sit up in bed when he felt something, or rather someone, pull him back down. The slight tug woke McCree up completely and he stared down at Hanzo in amazement. He couldn’t believe the other had stayed the whole night, but even more astonishing was Hanzo holding onto the cowboy. McCree never really took the other as the cuddly type, but I guess there’s always surprises waiting to be uncovered when it came to him.
He looks so peaceful when he’s asleep, even kinda cute. McCree thought. When Hanzo began to stir, he looked away and squeezed his eyes shut, trying his best to seem fast asleep. When Hanzo sat up in bed, McCree could feel his gaze on him and he remained as still as possible.
“That was the first time I’ve been able to sleep properly in a long time,” Hanzo spoke softly, running his fingers gently through McCree’s hair. “Thank you, Jesse.”
It wasn’t until McCree felt a warm pair of lips on his cheek that his body completely froze. As quickly as they appeared, they left and Hanzo pulled himself out of bed. It was followed by a soft patter of feet and the bedroom door slowly opening. Once the door closed, McCree sat up in bed and held his hand over where Hanzo had kissed him. Suddenly the door opened again and Hanzo popped his head into the room.
“Also, Jesse, try to be stealthier when you watch me sleep. Perhaps it’ll work next time,” Hanzo teased and closed the door again.
McCree couldn’t help but chuckle and feel heart-struck. He finally called me Jesse, McCree fawned over. Also, there’s gonna be a next time…