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The air behind the abandoned building thickened, it was foggy and cold outside today, the forest around the structure was covered by a cloud of mist. The wind brushed past in a quick breeze.
Fluixon was not expecting that today would go the way it did.
The mark on his neck pulsed, a raw ache that hit every nerve in his body. Engulfing a sharp pain every so often throughout his nervous system as he twitched. The shock and betrayal almost hurt more though, he stared at his best friend, Saparata, who was panting.
Flux’s face made an expression of fear with a mix of broken promise, the bitter taste landing on his heart instead of his tongue.
Saparata was not supposed to bite him, turn him– Flux knew the only way they both could survive was if Flux stayed human, that way he could go out to the town and provide them food and aid.
This won’t do. Half-zombies weren’t welcome in a post-apocalyptic town, Flux already had a hard time hiding Saps and butchering flesh from scattered corpses for him. He would soon look as obvious as Saps did.
Compared to Flux, Saps was pale, sluggish and had irritated wounds that didn’t seem to heal. His ears were sensitive to noise and he walked in a way that screamed zombie. Soon, Flux would become that way as well, leaving them to either die by being found or succumb to their own hunger and find people to eat.
Fluixon was not capable of killing anyone, he’d rather betray one person to save a thousand, surviving as a half-zombie was already marked off his mind. He’d rather be anything but the species that killed everyone he ever loved, and that included Saps.
Saps was kind, selfless and teased him a lot back at high school, they were inseparable and always shared the same opinions, he wasn’t like this before. Flux knew very well that Saps wouldn’t be the same anymore after the apocalypse but he didn’t know it would become this bad.
Saps was suffering too. Flux tried getting that through his head, his best friend surely didn’t want this, didn’t he?
Imagine if you had mind-eating temptation everyday, intrusive thoughts that took over your head– and the undying fear of your “life” being taken every second of the day. Becoming a half-zombie was a second chance at life and the fact that it could be seized at any time was horrifying to think about.
Flux would go crazy too, he didn’t wanna die, he was only 17 and had so much to live for, but after the apocalypse, the only person he ever cared about was Saps, the only person left in his life. Flux didn’t wanna die, he just wanted to stay with him.
Even so, the person he was looking at right now was not Saps, he couldn’t be Saps at all. Flux never took his eyes off of him, the ringing in his ears getting louder by the second. “I.. you didn’t mean to do what you just did, didn’t you?”
Flux didn’t wanna believe it.
Saparata wiped his mouth, blood smearing on his twitching hand, he looked at Flux’s bite mark on his neck and back at Flux’s eyes. “Do you feel it?”
Flux froze, that wasn’t an answer to his question. And he really needed that answer right now, or else he’ll..
“..Feel what?” Flux’s voice cracked in a broken whisper, he started to cough, tasting blood on his tongue as he swallowed.
Saps kicked the table nearby, a loud crash assaulting Flux’s ears as he flinched and covered them.
Saps just watched, observed Flux’s movement, he was slightly shaking now and Saps had no sign of concern at all in his eyes. The thought started to become the verdict, but Flux continued to deny it.
“How loud was that, Flux?” Saps demanded an answer, face cold and sharp as leftover blood stained Saps’ mouth.
“Too loud.” The world started to spin for Flux, his ears were still ringing and the wound on his neck was throbbing like crazy now, the pain travelling to all his other body parts. “Why are you doing this?”
Saps stared as Flux dropped to his knees, his back hitting the stone cold wall. Saps knew very well everything Flux was feeling right now, raised sensitivity to noise, unbearable pain on the bite mark and coughing. He’s gone through that.
“How could you bite me?”
Saps walked closer, kneeling down and grabbing Flux’s jaw to make him look up at Saps. Flux looked drained of blood and was sweating profusely, barely meeting Saps’ gaze especially since he was already starting to lose normal focus.
Their faces were close, Flux could see Saps’ moles and his blood-stained lips. Specifically Flux’s blood on his lips. Proof of his betrayal right on his mouth. “Flux, do you want to know what has been keeping me worried each day I breathe?”
Flux couldn’t answer, he could feel his body going limp if it wasn’t for Saps’ hold on his jaw, he’d definitely be on the ground right now, he kept his eyes on the floor, hands trembling– barely able to support himself.
He gave a weak nod before turning his gaze onto Saps again.
Saps tilted Flux’s face upwards, keeping their faces in line with each other. “That I was going to outlive you.”
He looked ashamed yet his words came out direct and clear.
“Even if we stayed together, it wasn’t going to be forever.” Saps looked serious now, like he has been wanting to say this for a long time. “Can you blame me, Flux?”
Flux looked at him like he couldn’t understand a word Saps was saying, but he definitely did, the reason why Saps bit him with the intention of turning Flux was-
“If you turned with me, we could stay together.” Saps paused. “Forever.”
He didn’t notice, but Saps’ grip on Flux’s jaw tightened since saying those words, he didn’t look like he was going to let go of Flux anytime soon.
Flux for the first time in a while felt so small. He was helpless, experiencing symptoms at present time and they were so, so much to handle. He could hear every drip of water down a pipe, Saps’ breathing and his own breathing. It didn’t help that Saps was so close to him, their faces were only a few inches away from each other and Flux couldn’t help but think if this was really necessary.
But still, he didn’t wanna be turned. He never wanted this, it never crossed his mind that he would die before Saps actually, especially since Flux was so careful at hiding him and keeping him full. He grew used to the routine.
But Saps’ worries were well justified too, even if he was found and threatened to be killed, with how much Flux cared about him, he would offer to be killed instead, and where would Saps go? he’d most definitely be captured and experimented on. No surprise for this sick town.
The people wouldn’t mind killing a traitor, Fluixon was going against his town by keeping the species that utterly destroyed it. And this town was driven with justice, no zombies were welcome here, they’d be shot in seconds now that the apocalypse was over, there were more humans than zombies.
And Saps was a half-zombie. He wasn’t fully turned and his tendencies aren’t that developed. All he remembers was that he was bit by another underdeveloped half zombie and Flux took his hand and stayed with him even with the risk of Saps eventually turning and biting him.
Saps doesn’t get why now, Flux was so against being a zombie with him– when back then, he didn’t even know that Saps was only going to be half yet he still stayed.
With how tight Flux was holding Saps’ hand and begging Saps not to leave him that day, he’d basically given Saps permission to turn him, no?
To Saps, if Flux wanted to stay with him so badly, it had to be forever or nothing.
“..You’re so selfish.”
Flux coughed out, voice quiet and drained now, his eyes couldn’t even look at Saps’ anymore, he kept them strictly on the ground.
“How am I selfish for wanting you to live with me forever?” Saps snapped back, turning his head down low to look at Flux.
“You only did this because you knew I'd die first.” Flux retorted, now with no choice staring back at Saps. “Is that not selfish?”
“I never wanted to be turned, and you knew that as well.” Flux’s voice started to raise now. “Yet you went with what you wanted instead, tell me what does that mean?”
“And you also didn’t wanna die, turning is what will make you live, Flux. How contradictory do you have to be?”
“I’d rather die than be a zombie.” Flux huffed, his blood starting to boil the more he feels Saps’ hold on him constrict.
“When you are a zombie, you are dead. It’s the same fucking thing, can you start thinking clearly?”
“Then I'd rather lose consciousness forever than live this way, are you happy?”
“Do I always need to spell it out for you, Saps?”
Saps’ voice also grew loud, each word he says echoing in Flux’s ear. “You’d rather die than be with me forever?”
“We wouldn't fucking last long at all! this town wants both of us dead.” Flux replied, heart beating so fast he could barely keep up– “Call me crazy, but we would’ve definitely survived longer if you just didn’t turn me.”
“When you’re a zombie, dying of natural causes isn’t possible, we could’ve just hid forever.” Saps spat.
“And you think we wouldn’t go insane just hiding forever?”
“Being with you keeps me sane, Flux.”
A beat.
“I get that it’s your first time becoming a half-zombie– but it’s fucking common sense that you’d already automatically go insane being one!” Saps yelled, heart racing.
“It’s not the other way around, the more you breathe as a zombie the more mad you get every fucking day of “living” okay?”
“Some days, hunger isn’t even the worst part. It’s convincing yourself to keep seeing tomorow.” He sighed.
“Hiding won’t hurt you as much as turning probably did, but no, Flux, I'm not sorry at all for biting you.”
Flux didn’t know what Saps felt. All he knew was that it was different from feeling human because of what Saps said before, he could definitely put a couple of obvious guesses though, oversensitive sense of hearing, injuries that won’t heal anymore– and a need for human flesh now that he was starting to feel it as well.
Flux’s heart was beating so fast– he could hear it. It was loud and definitely wasn’t going to slow down any time soon. “You never seemed insane at all.” Flux muttered, tearing his gaze away now.
“You were just.. you, but now. I’m starting to see it.”
“You kept me in check, Flux. Because of you, I never felt the impending doom in my stomach knowing that I was different now, nothing like before.”
“We talked like we were still normal high schoolers, do you know how much that means to me when we are in a town full of people that want me–or us dead?”
“And they only want you dead because of me. It’s always because of me, you were gonna die before me one day and it’d be all my fault for becoming a zombie, for being bit that one night.”
Flux bit his lip, he could hear the distress in Saps’ voice and he couldn’t help but feel pity that he still couldn’t or just didn’t understand Saps’ actions.
“It wasn’t your fault you got bit, Saps.” Flux tried to reassure him, lowering his voice.
“It was my fault, I purposely went out there.”
Flux froze, what was Saps admitting? he could feel his heart suddenly drop and his stomach start to twist. “You what?”
Was he insane?
“It was either that or jumping off the rooftop, yet in my final moments, I didn't want you to know I'd left you on purpose.” Saps explained. “I’m still so glad I chose that instead, you don’t know how much my heart broke seeing you beg me not to leave while I was slowly becoming infected.”
Flux couldn’t say Saps had no reason, Flux chose to stay by his side that night as well, he would’ve turned if Saps didn’t end up half-zombie. Both of them were ready to die in a way. Saps to his own hands, and Flux to the hands of Saps.
“That night I opened my eyes and slowly saw that somebody actually wanted me here.”
“And that was you, Flux.”
“So please, let me keep my reason to continue living.”