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“YOU DID WHAT?” Spirit bellowed, looking from Marie to Stein, the two of them wearing vastly different looks. Stein, unamused at the spittle that Spirit had thrown onto his face, and Marie somewhat sheepish.
“We got married-”
“Yeah, I heard that part!” Spirit said, distressed. “But you didn’t even invite me! What the hell? I’m supposed to be your best friend?”
“Under what definition-” Stein started, but Marie nudged him in the ribs, muttering something of a warning at him.
“Spirit, come on. It was while we were on the run. You weren’t there.”
“So you eloped. You got hitched on the fly and didn’t even tell me?”
“It was none of your business.”
“What Stein means to say is-”
“Is that it is none of your business-”
“Is that we appreciate your friendship, but it was kind of an…impromptu thing, you know?”
Spirit looked ready to cry. “After all we’ve been through…”
“You act as though I cheated on you,” Stein said, frankly.
“You friend cheated on me! Friends tell friends when they’re getting married!” Spirit accused, and Stein’s brows furrowed.
“That isn’t a thing. Is that a thing, Marie?”
“Spirit,” Marie said, soothingly, completely ignoring her husband. “Stein still likes you as a friend the most.”
“Did you tell Azusa?” Spirit sniffled, and Marie’s guilty expression told him that she did. “See!?” Spirit said, whirling back around to look at Stein. “She told her best friend!”
“Committee already knew that Marie was pregnant by what shoes she was wearing-”
“It doesn’t matter! Friends tell friends. There’s the proof.”
“We are not frie-”
“Stein just was nervous about telling you, Spirit! You know, it was a big decision for him.”
“Not particularly- would you stop elbowing me, Marie-?”
“In any case, we wanted to tell you, now! In person,” Marie appeased.
“You need to have a second wedding,” Spirit said, suddenly. “I wanted to be the best man.”
“I wasn’t the best man at your wedding,” Stein pointed out. “Besides, a second wedding is asinine. Marie and I are already married.”
But Marie, musing aloud, seemed to consider it seriously. “A second wedding?? I could have a pretty white dress, like I always wanted! And a nice cake- your family eats kosher, right?”
“Marie, we don’t need a second wedding.”
“Stein, your wife wants a second wedding!” Spirit said. “You two need a second wedding.”
“We do not need a second wedding-”
“And we could have a second honeymoon!” Marie said.
“You’re right, Spirit,” Stein replied. “Marie and I need a second wedding.”