Chapter Text
A New Kara
When Kara tells her about her second life as Supergirl Lena doesn't take it well. She hurls accusations and insults, tells her that she's just like Lena's family, a betrayer, a liar. Kara clenches her fists and grits her teeth and tries, Lena can tell, tries to take it all in stride so she can convince Lena that she isn't, that she had been lying to her to protect her. Lena doesn't want to hear it. Protecting her would have been giving her the full picture. Protecting her would have been believing in her, more Lena says when Kara claims that she does.
Because Lena can't imagine that Kara's belief is real. She's convinced Kara had been keeping an eye on her at best, manipulating her, using her at worst, as a means to an end. Every word out of Kara's mouth rings hollow in her ears, and every time she had claimed that Kara was her friend, her hero, flashes through her mind and she feels bile rising in her throat.
She kicks Kara out, and keeps pushing her away every time she reaches out until she stops. Until Kara gets the message, that Lena doesn't want anything to do with a traitor. It takes weeks but it happens, and Lena feels a tired relief when another week goes by without a word from Kara.
Until Supergirl disappears.
Alien threats are tackled by the DEO, the heavy hitters by the Martian. She's not sure what's keeping Kara away, and the general public walk the streets quicker, with wary glances and hushed words. Supergirl being gone is like the sun disappearing, and National City feels her loss acutely.
Lena gets an answer unceremoniously, by way of the Martian landing on her balcony where Supergirl usually does. He doesn't bother with knocking and phases through the glass. Lena glares at him when he's fully in the room.
"Ms. Luthor, you're in danger," he says instead of a greeting.
"So a day ending in 'y'?"
"This threat is one you should take seriously."
Lena frowns at the Matrian. She prefers not to use his name, even in her head, to keep things simpler for herself. "Why? What is it?"
"Supergirl."
That gets her attention. J'onn explains that Supergirl had gone with another hero, called the Flash, to another universe, to help him fight some grand threat there. Something had gone wrong with the return trip, and Flash and his team as well as the DEO had scoured signals across different universes until they found what they thought was a match.
But the Supergirl who came through wasn't their own. Their first clue had been her reaction to J'onn himself. She had threatened him, told him he was wearing the face of a dead ally and that she would find out who he really was and make him pay. She still listened to Alex at least, and calmed down enough to come around to the idea that she wasn't in her own universe.
"And how does this affect me?" Lena asks. If things were different perhaps it would affect her. Her Kara- no, this universe's Kara, this universe's Supergirl could have still been her friend, if only...
No. She won't dwell on what had happened between the two of them.
"Because Lex succeeded," J'onn said. "The Superman in her universe died the day of the red sun, and Lex started a campaign of terror against the aliens of her Earth. And she killed him for it."
Lena freezes. That can't be right. Not Lex's death- he is a monster, she knows, and his obsession with Superman and aliens would have always had a violent end- but the fact that Kara had been the one to kill him. That Kara had killed him, instead of capturing him. That Kara was capable of it, in at least one universe.
"And- and the me in that universe? Did I help Lex? Why would I be in danger?"
"We don't have the full picture," J'onn says. "But she mentioned Cadmus, and the danger they posed, and the-" his mouth presses into a line, "-the measures she took."
Cadmus meant her mother, Lena knew. Two Luthors dead at the hands of this alternate Supergirl. J'onn and the DEO were right to feel that Lena's life was in danger.
"And what of them here?" she asks. "Do you think this new Supergirl will try to kill Lex again? Or go after my mother?"
"We're figuring it out," J'onn says. "She's not the same as our Supergirl, but she hasn't indicated that she kills first, just... as an option."
"Okay," Lena says. "So what do you expect me to do?"
"Until we get a better idea of where her mind is, I'll be watching over you."
Lena frowns and opens her mouth to argue, but he holds up a hand to forestall her.
"You won't even know I'm here," he continues, "and it will be a temporary arrangement, whether she's trustworthy or not."
Lena stares at him for a few moments and reads between the lines. They're prepared to detain this version of Supergirl, if she's a threat. She wonders what Alex feels about that. "Fine. Let me know if anything changes."
"I will." He turns to go but stops before he phases through the glass door again. "She wanted to tell you sooner. It's the rest of us who stopped her."
"It was her secret," Lena answers. "We both know she's stubborn enough to have told me, if she really wanted to."
"No. No, she isn't. Not with that."
She doesn't have an answer for his flat refusal, and he leaves before she can think of one.
She spends the next few days on a knife's edge. Her life had always been in danger, but not like this. Not from a being that could move faster than she could see, that could lift her building up and throw it into space if it had enough structural integrity, that could fire lasers from far enough away that she would never see it coming. She wonders if this is what Lex had felt when he thought about Superman, and she has to tell herself that at least her fear is rational. This new Supergirl had killed Luthors before and has more reason than even most on her Earth to hate her name.
It only helps a little, especially when her mind turns to ideas for protecting herself that don't rely on someone that calls himself 'Manhunter.'
But only three days after J'onn's visit Alex calls on her at her penthouse. She texts first, telling her that she needs to see her on official business, and as soon as Lena agrees there's a buzz at her intercom asking if an Alex Danvers can come up to see her.
When she opens the door and sees Alex the first thing she thinks is that the other woman isn't sleeping enough, then she thinks that she's being a little hypocritical considering her own work habits, then she thinks that that thought sounds like Kara, then she hates herself for the stab of loss she feels.
If only Kara were easier to hate.
They don't exchange pleasantries. Alex jumps into telling her that Supergirl is no longer considered a threat and will be back in business, as far as the wider world is concerned. In theory only a select few will know she's a doppelganger from another universe.
But Alex does slip into more personal talk, talk about this new Supergirl.
"She's hurting, and there's nothing I can do. It all happened in another world. Even my Kara, she's lost so much, but not everything. Not Superman. She was sent here to protect him, you know. I think losing him when she could have done something is what's done this to this other Kara. She's all... cold now."
Part of Lena wants to tell Alex to stop talking and leave. To say that she doesn't care, not anymore, not about Kara from any universe. But part of her still views the woman in front of her as a friend, a friend who's hurting over the loss of her sister and the idea that things could be so different, so much worse. She wants to comfort her, to tell her that they'll figure this out together then offer her a class of scotch. She settles for silence.
Alex wipes at her face and collects herself. "Listen, Lena, you don't owe us anything, but things would be simpler if we get our Supergirl back. We're doing what we can, and we have an inter-dimensional device to work with, but you're the most brilliant person I know, and that's saying a lot. Things would go faster with your help."
"What about her?" she asks.
"She's agreed to keep working as Supergirl, and she's agreed to listen to me. She says I'm just like her Alex, which I hope is a good thing, and we talked about you. You must have gone to ground in her universe, she didn't even know you exist. I told her you're one of the good guys. She doesn't believe me, but she said she'd leave you alone."
"How reassuring," Lena says.
Alex gives her a tight smile at her tone. "I know. I'm not saying you have to, just... things would be easier for you too."
"I'll think about it," Lena says. She means it too, if only to escape the dark thoughts that plague her with this new Supergirl in town.
"I still see so much of her in there, so much of my Kara.," Alex says. She runs a hand through her short hair. "I can still see the little girl who struggled to fit in, but she's lost so much more. I can tell she doesn't like what she's done, but..."
"It's all she knows," Lena says.
Alex grimaces. "Yeah, I think so."
Alex leaves without an answer, though Lena's mind is made up. This other Supergirl needs to go, for all of their sakes.
The DEO hadn't changed much since the last time she had been there. She still gets some looks from agents, but the people she knows greet her warmly, if a little awkwardly. Alex reassures her that Supergirl is out patrolling, and shows her to the lab where they're looking for their Kara and for the other one's home. They all suspect it'll be the same place, and Lena cringes at the thought. Their Kara being exposed to a world like that, a harsh world where the entire purpose she had been sent to Earth is gone, could change her.
Lena tries not to think about it. She only allows herself to think 'the sooner the better.'
National City is glad to have Supergirl back, for the first week, at least. After that the questions start. Isn't she different? Isn't she harsher? Isn't she hurting the people she stops more than she has to?
Lena had heard about the incident before she had arrived, the red kryptonite that had altered Supergirl's behavior. It had damaged her reputation for months, and Lena can only imagine what it did to Kara. She imagines the city had been much like this at the time, harsh and distrusting despite everything Supergirl had done, despite...
But she can't allow herself to feel sympathy for Supergirl, not when she had treated Lena like a Luthor, not when Kara had lied for so long.
The first time she sees the other Supergirl in person is an accident. She's in the lab trying to find a more efficient process for sorting through possible universes when Alex and Supergirl enter. They seem surprised at first, so Lena doubts that Supergirl had sought her out to kill her, but then Supergirl's face twists in anger and she isn't so sure.
"This is the Luthor?" Her name is spat from this Kara's mouth like a curse, and before she can blink Kara is in front of her, commanding her vision.
"You trust her," Alex says. "Our version of you."
"The naive idiot?"
"I don't let her talk about herself like that," Alex says, "let alone some copy."
"Then let this copy decide who she wants to trust," Kara says. Her eyes haven't left Lena, and Lena feels a fear she didn't know she was capable of feeling: a fear of Kara Danvers.
"Does it bother you? That I killed your brother?" Kara asks.
"You didn't, my brother is in secure holding for his crimes," Lena says. She does her best to keep her voice even. She isn't sure how much she succeeds.
"I've seen the reports, it sounds like he's really learned his lesson, barely any attempts on anyone's life since he's been in there," Kara sneers. "Maybe I should do the other me a favor, one she's not strong enough to do herself, and kill this version of him too. It'd be easy this time, with no kryptonite."
"Kara!" Alex yells in warning.
But Lena keeps her own gaze steady, unwilling to show this Kara if her words have any affect. "Killing an unarmed prisoner wouldn't be ethical. From what I've heard, you've taken drastic measures in your world, but haven't crossed those lines."
Kara doesn't seem bothered by Lena's words either. "Nice argument. Are you sure that's all there is? That's the only reason you don't want me killing your brother? I wouldn't be ruining any plans the two of you are hatching?"
"I'm not working with my brother," Lena says. It's hard to speak though, with such a familiar face looking at her with such disdain, saying the things she had always feared to hear from someone so close.
Kara smiles then, a vicious smile, and she looms larger in Lena's vision. "Nice wording, Luthor. Your family was always good with twisting what you say to sound believable. Not working with your brother, huh? Your mother then. Cadmus ring any bells? Guess what happened to them."
Lena feels her jaw clench at the thought. Her adoptive mother was no saint, but she hadn't lost herself like Lex had. It was easy to rationalize the other Lex's death at the hands of this Kara as the inevitable outcome of a man gone mad with power, but Lillian was always more composed. Maybe not reasonable, but she knew when to give up. And although Lena knows that this Kara is trying to provoke her, she also knows that it's working.
"Did I hit a nerve?" Kara asks.
"I worked with the DEO and Supergirl to stop my mother," Lena says. "Actively and more than once."
"More than once? Funny, I only had to face her once, then never had to hear from her again. And doesn't it seem convenient that three Luthors are alive and one of them has access to the DEO? The hub for alien activity?"
"Enough, Kara, this isn't your world and I don't need you threatening to mess it up," Alex cuts in.
But Kara doesn't acknowledge her, and instead takes a step into Lena's personal space. Lena finds herself backing away unconsciously, until her back hits the wall.
"What are you planning, Luthor?" Kara growls.
Then there's a click and the lights in the room are replaced with the red glow of the lamps that mirror Krypton's sun.
"I said enough," Alex grabs Kara and pulls her back, spins her so they're face to face. "You said I'm still like the Alex that you know, so listen to me when I tell you that I trust Lena. I trust her with my life, with your life, with my sister's life. And guess what, I see some of her still inside you too, despite all this. So I need you to tap into it to give Lena a chance."
"Her brother took the last piece of my home from me," Kara growls, and Lena's heart shrinks at the hate she hears. "Kal-El died at his hands, along with a thousand other aliens, and thousands of humans as collateral damage. I know what that family is capable of."
"You don't know what Lena is capable of," Alex says. "But my Kara knows. She's always known."
"What is she capable of?" Kara sneers.
"Good. She's capable of as much good as Supergirl is." Alex taps something on her watch and the red lights fade back to the standard overheads. Lena thinks for a moment that Supergirl will attack one of them for it, will kill Lena out of fear or spite or pure hatred, but she only stands there, staring at Alex. "You don't have to like it, but you will be on board with it, or I'll lock you up and throw away the key."
"How?" Kara demands.
"How do you think?"
Lena has always respected Alex's steely resolve, but never more than in that moment, as she stares down an angry Kryptonian who could no doubt kill her before she could enact any kind of containment procedure. Either Kara feels the same respect, or she knows that Alex is her best chance at getting to her own world again, because she says nothing and leaves the room without another glance at either of them.
When she's gone Lena allows some of the tension in her body to leave in a shaky breath. "Thank you, Alex," she says, knowing that Kara can still hear her but no longer caring.
Alex stares after her sister from another universe. "She's Kara, but she's Kara if everything went wrong." Her voice is distant. "I wish I could do something for her."
"I think the best thing to do for her is to get her out of this universe and back to her own," Lena says.
Alex's mouth presses into a thin line and her eyes stay on the door Kara had left through. "Maybe. I'm sorry you had to go through that."
She turns to Lena then and gives her a small smile.
"It's fine, nothing I haven't heard before," Lena says.
"But not from her," Alex says. She steps closer to Lena, puts a comforting hand on her shoulder. "And you know she never would. Our Kara."
"Maybe," she says distantly, mirroring Alex's earlier answer.
Alex frowns. "She's sorry, you know. We all are. And I want you to know, if you want to blame anyone for Kara keeping her secret from you, it should be me."
"It was her secret."
"No, it really wasn't. I'm not saying you have to forgive her right away, just... when she gets back, give her a chance to talk to you, to really talk."
Lena nods and Alex leaves. She spends a few minutes recovering her nerve before returning to her work.
She sees the other Kara occasionally in the DEO as she works with Brainy to figure out where their Kara is. The other Kara is distant and cold, even with people she knows. But then, the agents around her aren't really the people she knows. She still listens to Alex though, there's enough of their bond there that Lena even notices when they lean on each other, each missing their own version of the other. It's the only time she sees any signs of Kara in this other Supergirl. The only time she seems less than alien.
Lena gets a wide berth and suspicious glares, and it feels worse than she expects. Kara- her Kara- had been so bright and sunny, had invaded Lena's life with her light and now all she has is this copy's darkness. She wonders, considering where she and her Kara left off, if that's what she will get when they're reunited. She hadn't been kind to Kara when Kara had tried to talk to her, first as herself and later in her suit, desperate for Lena to listen.
Lena wonders if she deserves that sunshine again.
The second time she interacts with the other Kara is in a DEO lab again, though she isn't sure why Supergirl enters. She only stares at Lena for a few moments before settling into a tense lean against a wall.
"Checking to make sure I'm not plotting anything?" Lena asks. This Kara still scares her, but she's never been one to hide away from her fear.
"Are you?"
"No."
Kara doesn't care to continue talking, but she stays in the lab watching Lena work. Lena is sure that this Kara is itching to get home, that she must hate having to be so close to another Luthor. She spends some time arranging more models before setting the computer to run through them, then she sits back and waits. She glances at Kara every now and again, who seems lost in her own thoughts. She and Kara have never spent so long in each other's company without speaking, but then, this isn't her Kara.
The thought still doesn't soothe her frayed nerves, and her mouth moves before she can really think about it.
"How is it, here, compared to your universe?" she asks.
"It's quiet here," Kara says. "I've been thinking about it. Maybe seeing Superman die, knowing a Super can be killed, shook something in people. Then they saw me kill Lex too, and maybe they realized that aliens are just like humans." Her gaze cuts through Lena. "Violent, and vindictive."
"You're starting to sound like my brother," Lena says.
"He was crazy, but smart. Smart enough to kill Superman, in at least one universe. And the way these people look at me, maybe I see his point."
Lena frowns at that. "How do you mean?"
"These people expect me to fix all their problems, to protect them. They don't have to worry that someone will kill me, not really, because they haven't seen it happen. They look to me like I'm a god, just like your brother said. And they shouldn't."
Lena remembers her own words, thrown at Supergirl, accusing her of having a God Complex. After seeing this Supergirl, this Kara, she knows better.
"I don't think that's quite right," she says.
Kara just stares at her, waiting for her to continue.
"I think she gives them hope," Lena says, careful to make the distinction between this Kara and her Kara. "They see her help with big things, things that can destroy the entire city, or more, but they also see her help with the small things too. She can't pass a cat in a tree without helping it down, or a ball kicked onto a roof, just... everyday things that help people out. They've all seen it, or know someone who has. And they've seen her lose before, they've seen her bleed even. But they've seen her always get back up, always win in the end. So I don't think it's worship. I think they're thankful to have someone like her, someone so good, who always sees the best in everything. In everyone."
"Like she saw the best in you?" Kara asks. From her tone Lena knows this Kara has been snooping around for information on her and her Kara. She must know about their fight.
But Lena doesn't rise to the bait. She knows now, maybe she's known all along, that Kara believed in her. Whatever messed up reason she may have had for keeping her identity from Lena, it wasn't lack of belief. She knows now what a lack of belief in her looks like, and it looks like hatred, and anger, and naked threats.
"Yeah," she says instead of all of that. "Exactly like that."
They sit in silence for a while longer, Lena at her computer working with different models, Kara with her thoughts.
Supergirl starts spending any time not out fighting threats in the lab, and it's not only when Lena is there. She drops in one day unannounced and Supergirl is there, watching Brainy working instead of her. It eases some of the tension she feels when she sees Supergirl, to think that she's only worried about the process of getting her home instead of who's doing it.
Lena's still sure that she receives more scrutiny than the others. She sees it in the way Supergirl starts to open up to some of the more familiar faces, and even the unfamiliar ones. She hadn't known Nia in her world, yet the two aliens get along just fine after a few interactions. Lena's sure that Nia even makes her laugh, a rare feat with this Supergirl.
But Lena still doesn't get that ease. She gets long looks through narrowed eyes instead, and tension in muscles that are stronger than steel. She holds her head high anyway. She's used to the world looking at her like that, so she's sure she can handle suspicion from the superhero.
Even if she has Kara's face.
"Why do you keep coming here if I make you so angry?" Lena asks. "You could save us both the headache and only stop by when one of the others is here."
"I want to see what she saw," Kara says.
"What do you mean?"
"You're all over her life. Pictures in her apartment, pictures and videos in her phone. You know she has a nickname for you as your contact? It took me forever to figure out who you were."
"No," Lena says with a frown. Kara had never really used anything other than her name with her. When Supergirl doesn't continue she's forced to ask, "what is it?"
"Sunshine."
Lena snorts. "I didn't take her for a sarcastic nickname kind of girl."
"I don't think she is," Supergirl says.
Lena gives her a look. "I'm hardly a ray of sunshine."
"No, you're not."
Supergirl tilts her head in that way that means she hears an emergency and turns to leave before Lena can ask anything more.
"It'd be simpler if you let me kill him. Your Supergirl wouldn't have to dirty her hands." There's contempt there, which seems odd to Lena for someone to feel contempt for another version of themselves. Especially for Supergirl, who typically exudes an astounding amount of hope.
Lena frowns. "He's a prisoner, serving multiple life sentences."
"So?"
Lena balks at the question, the callousness of it. "So it'd be unethical to kill him."
"What would the difference be?" Supergirl asks.
"He'd be alive," Lena answers.
"To the rest of the world. What would the difference be to the rest of the world?"
"He-" Lena stops herself from repeating the same answer. Most of the world wouldn't care if Lex died of a heart attack that very day, and the only people who would were hateful xenophobes. What would the difference be if this Supergirl killed him instead. "If they see Supergirl going around killing people who are already in prison that would shake their faith in her. They'd want her stopped, any way possible."
"I'm talking about Lex, not some petty criminal with a drug charge."
"You're talking about someone who's already been stopped, who can't harm anyone else anymore."
"We both know that isn't true."
Lena frowns again. "But it's what the justice system determined he deserved for his crimes."
"And the justice system is perfect?"
"It's better than one person being judge, jury, and executioner."
There's a tense silence. Lena wonders if she's stepped on a landmine that's about to explode in her face.
"He'll get out," Kara says. "If he does while I'm here I'll take care of it. But if it's after, she might have to answer some hard questions about herself. And I don't think she's up for it."
Lena holds her head up. "Maybe. But we'd find a way."
"We?"
Lena hadn't even realized she had said 'we', but it doesn't feel wrong. She nods. "We. And maybe she wouldn't be able to stop him the way you did, and maybe it would be necessary. But as you keep reminding me, I'm a Luthor. And I can make hard decisions."
Kara leaves without another word, and Lena wonders if there's truth in her own words. Somewhere deep inside she knows there is, that if it was a choice between Lex's life or Kara, she'd pick Kara, every time. She doesn't know what to do with this new information.
"Have you gone to see this universe's Superman?" Lena asks one day.
Supergirl gives her a sharp look. "No."
"Why not?"
"He's not my cousin," Supergirl answers immediately. Too fast, Lena thinks. She's thought about it, but something is keeping her from doing it.
"He wouldn't mind," Lena says. "He might even welcome it."
"Yeah, well, he left me with the Danvers. Then he left me for good."
The bitter tone in her voice is familiar to Lena. It sounds like her own whenever she talks about the people who have betrayed her. It's a preemptive strike, its own kind of defense against the tumultuous feelings behind it.
"He'd want to help," she says quietly. "He'd probably even let you hit him."
Supergirl actually snorts at that, and a flicker of warmth passes through Lena. She knows it's dangerous- this isn't even her Kara and she's letting the other woman back in- but she can't help it. This bitterness and anger, the hatred and fear don't suit Kara's face.
The next evening there are reports of a fight between the two Kryptonians, and the morning after that there's an interview with Lois Lane in The Daily Planet with them. "A typical family fight that got out of hand," Superman is quoted as saying. "He took the dessert for himself, and we take dessert very seriously on Krypton," is Supergirl's contribution.
They're seen together for the next week, stopping crime across the country, helping in crises across the planet, and when Supergirl returns she's lighter, still not smiling as easily but not as dark either.
"Thank you," she says quietly the next time they're in the lab together.
"We're close," Lena tells Kara another day. "The biggest issue seems to be that our two universes have almost the same... frequency, I guess you'd say. They're so similar it muddied the transporter and mixed you guys up."
"And that means you're close?" Kara asks.
"It narrows down the range considerably, and we just need to fine tune our instruments to make sure we don't involve a third Supergirl, and that won't take long at all."
"The last thing we need is another one of me," Kara says. "Who knows, she might even be an evil clone."
"That'd be a sight. Supergirl fighting Supergirl. I wonder who would win."
"Supergirl."
Lena laughs a little at that, and when she looks up from her instruments Kara is staring at her. It isn't the open hostility from before, and it's still not the easy comfort from before before, but it's better.
"What?" she asks.
"When your Supergirl is back, ask her about her drawings."
Lena blinks. "Her drawings?"
Kara nods. "Of you."
"Drawings of me?"
Kara smiles, the first Lena has seen on this one's face, directed at her, at least. "I thought you were supposed to be a genius. Her drawings, yeah. I sketch before I paint something, and your Supergirl does too."
That is news to Lena. "I didn't even know Kara liked to paint."
"I mostly paint Krypton," Kara says. Lena's aware that the lines have blurred between this Kara and her Kara, despite her best efforts. Especially recently, with the cessation of hostilities between them. "She wouldn't have shown you until after she told you about herself."
"Ah," Lena says. "Well, that didn't go so well."
"Do you wish it had?" Kara asks.
Lena hesitates.
"Do you wish you and her could get along together again?" Kara presses.
Lena sighs. "I don't know if she would want to, after some of the things I said to her."
"She does," Kara says. "Tell her to show you the drawings."
Lena isn't sure why Kara is so insistent, but she nods. "Okay."
"This is it," Alex says to the assembled room. Everyone's there to see Kara off, everyone who knows the secret at least. There's an energy in the air, nervous excitement. They want their Kara back, but Kara seems impossible not to like from any universe, and they can't be sure what kind of shape their Kara will be in considering the world Kara had told them about. Lena knows that sun lamps are close and that Alex is an action first kind of woman with a penchant for overreacting when it comes to her sister.
Kara stands on a transporter connected to a large computer, one needed to differentiate between the minute differences between her 'frequency' and their Kara's. She looks over the room at large. "Thank you all for your help. I'm- I'm glad so many of you are the same good people in two worlds, and I may have to find some new friends when I get back to mine."
Lena hears Nia sniffle a little at that. Kara catches Lena's eye and holds it. "You've shown me a lot, all of you. I hope my world has been as kind to your Supergirl as you've been to me."
Alex grasps her shoulder and squeezes, hard enough to hurt a human Lena is sure, but unnoticeable to a Kryptonian. She holds up a thumb drive with her other hand. "I'm glad we could help. And I've got some info on threats we've faced, schematics that have helped us. Take care of yourself."
Kara takes the drive and slips it into her suit with a nod. Alex steps back and turns the machine on, and Kara is enveloped in a bright light. There's an odd noise, a high-pitched hum that almost sounds human, then a crack and the light fades. The suit is a little different and the startled look on her face tells the room that this is their Kara.
"I'm back?"
Alex pulls her into a crushing hug and doesn't let go for a long time. Lena leaves. She has time to see Kara, she knows. She'll let everyone else revel in their happiness without having be considerate of her and Kara's tense relationship.
Kara seeks Lena out days later, likely after she's talked to everyone else. Lena can't blame her, not with the way they had left things. With the way Lena had treated her. But she does seek her out, in her penthouse just before Lena turns in for bed, and Lena doesn't even hesitate to let her in when she knocks tentatively on the balcony door.
"Thanks for helping bring me back," Kara says.
"Of course," Lena says. She bites her lip. "What was it like? The other you made it sound like a war zone."
Kara's jaw tenses and her eyes dart around. "That sounds like an accurate description. There's never any time to stop and think, there's always something to do, some crime to stop or some violence going on. No one seems to want to help each other, not like here at least."
"No one? The police, the DEO?"
"Both stretched too thin," Kara says. "I tried to change things, but no one wanted to hear what I had to say. Maybe if I had more time..."
"That's not your world, it's not your responsibility," Lena says.
"I still wish I could have done more," Kara says.
And that's the constant truth with Kara. She takes on so much, shoulders so much, and rarely asks for help. She'll take it if it's offered, but she won't go out of her way to ask unless things are truly dire. She won't tell anyone anything until something breaks.
"Kara, about- about us-"
"I'm sorry, Lena, for keeping this from you for so long," Kara interrupts.
"I- I'm sorry too," Lena says. "I should have listened. I just reacted. I've been betrayed so many times I just- I couldn't handle the idea that you had done so too. That you were just like everyone else."
"I know, and I know you can't-
"But you're not like everyone else," Lena interrupts in turn. "I know that now."
She'd been so angry at Kara, so hurt. But even a Kara who had seen her cousin die at the hands of a Luthor had come to trust her, in some small capacity. Maybe it was time for Lena to let go of her hurt, her anger, and let Kara back into her life. God knows she had missed her, even if she hadn't admitted as much to herself.
Lena continues. "Even she gave me a chance. Because of you. She told me to ask you about your pictures of me."
Kara hesitates. "Pictures?"
"Drawings, she said," Lena corrects herself.
"I- I don't know," Kara says.
"Please, Kara, please show me, whatever it is she meant. Even before you left I was a wreck. Seeing a you who wasn't you only made it worse, and something there was important enough to change her mind about me, the sister of the man who killed her only family. And I- I want you back, us back, even if it's hard."
"It's not like I drew you as a monster, Lena," Kara says, head down. "I just- it's personal. Did she say anything else about them?"
"Only that she usually draws Krypton."
Kara sighs. "So do I. And I want us back too, I just- if I show you, it might change things between us."
"Things have already changed," Lena says. "I'll have you whatever way you want me to have you."
Kara draws herself up at that but can't quite meet her eyes. "You don't know what you're asking."
"Then show me."
Lena stares until Kara is forced to look at her again, and something in her must show Kara how serious she is, because Kara nods at her. "Okay. When?"
"Now."
Lena insists on Kara flying them over together, the first time Supergirl carries her with her secret out, and she takes everything in with the new knowledge. She feels a burn where Kara's hands and arms touch her, under her knees and along her back, and when she hides her head against Kara's shoulder she wonders how she never put it together herself when she realizes all she can smell is Kara's soap.
The flight is short and the dismount awkward- Lena has to slither through the window since they can't fit through with Kara holding her- and she finds herself back in Kara's apartment, where Kara had revealed herself as Supergirl, and she takes it all in with that in mind. It doesn't seem any different, even with a different Kara living there for a few months.
Then Kara is coming out of her bedroom with a sketchpad in her hands and a frown on her face.
"They're nothing special," she says as she flips through the pad. "I sketch out what I want to paint before I do, so it's not like, a great drawing or anything."
"You wanted to paint me?" Lena asks.
Kara stops on a page and frowns down at it. "I don't know." She hands the sketchpad over.
Lena sees herself there, a sketch of her face. It is a little rough around the edges, but it's good- beautiful even, if she could be a little conceited. But the beauty isn't just in her face, she realizes. Instead it's in the care that's gone into it, the obvious attention that's been paid to her every edge and curve, to the set of her jaw and the waves in her hair.
"Is this how you see me?" she asks.
Kara gives an embarrassed shrug. "I go for realism in my paintings. It... helps."
Lena flips the page on a hunch. Drawings, the other Supergirl had said. And there she is again, a different pose with more of her body, then another page and another sketch, her behind her desk from Kara's point of view, a soft smile on her face as she looks out from the page, at Kara, then the sketchpad is taken from her hand.
"Happy?" Kara mutters as she closes the sketchpad and holds it against herself.
It's endearing despite the guilt she feels, and Lena feels she's on the precipice of something big. Something she hadn't acknowledged. "When did you draw those?"
"After- after our fight," Kara answers.
"Why?"
Kara scrunches her face up as if she doesn't want to answer. But she does, with a quiet voice. "I missed you."
Lena feels her heart start to race. "And- and why am I 'Sunshine' in your phone?"
Kara blanches at that. "She told you that?"
"Kara."
"It's so cheesy," Kara says with a needling tone, and it's the first real habit of Kara's that Lena has seen in months.
She aches for more. "You know I like cheesy."
"I just... you know I get my power from the sun," Kara says without looking at her.
"And?"
But Lena figures it out as soon as the word is out of her mouth, and she can tell that Kara knows she has from the blush coloring her cheeks. And that's- big, she knows. It's a big deal that Kara puts her on the same level as the very source of her strength.
"Kara," she breathes.
Kara shrugs. "It's not important, just a silly thought I had one day. I can change it."
"Don't," Lena says. "I'd like to be that for you again. If you'll let me."
Kara looks at her properly, eyebrows drawn together. "What are you saying?"
"Let me take you out," Lena says. "A date. Let me prove to you that I forgive you, that I want to know you, all of you, that I... that I love you."
Kara looks away. "You just went through something pretty intense, Lena, and you really don't have to pretend for me, I'd be happy to have my friend back."
"I know what I feel, Kara." She reaches out and touches Kara's face cups her cheek and brings their gazes together. "God I've been so stupid. I love you, Kara. That's why it hurt so much when I thought you were just using me, why it hurt when the other you was here and looking at me like she hated me."
Kara closes her eyes and nuzzles into her hand. "Are you sure?"
The question is brittle and Lena realizes the power she has over Kara, then the extent of the hurt she had caused. She'll spend the rest of her life making up for it, she swears, long after Kara says she forgives her because Kara forgives too easily.
"I've never been more sure of anything," Lena says.
Kara's eyes open again and she looks down at Lena. "Say it again?"
"As many times as you want, darling. I love you. Kara Danvers, I love you so much, and I want to spend the rest of my life showing you."
Then Kara's hand is on the back of her neck, pulling her in, and Lena uses the hand still on Kara's cheek to tilt her head just so, and they're kissing, soft and slow. When Kara pulls away her eyes shine in the moonlight.
"I love you too, Lena Luthor."