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The credits started rolling, Dancing Queen flooding the speakers in the room.
"Post-movie interview, what are your thoughts?" Grace pointed an imaginary microphone at Simon.
"I liked the music," Simon answered, still staring at the credits as they went by the screen.
"And he liked the music!" Grace brought over the imaginary microphone towards himself. A small victory for musical lovers, a big victory for himself.
There were some things Grace was grateful for being added features in the Hail Mary, one of them being all the video games that had ever been created being fit inside the laptops. The other one was all pieces of audiovisual media also being available for him just one laptop search away, all the movies and show he ever wanted to watch in a nice, infinite library for him to peruse and select. He had been putting it to use now more than ever on his way to Erid, especially with Simon on board, making it his goal to introduce the man to any piece of media he thought was important back in Earth. There was a form of wonder and joy seeing someone experience all of these things for the first time without any prior knowledge of them.
So far, Grace (and Simon, by extent) had learned that Simon enjoyed dramas, corny action movies with "cool action scenes" (the criteria for this was still being defined), and comedic animated movies. Simon had liked Notting Hill, though, and now Grace was making his way through different romcoms to see if they could add them to the list of movie genres Simon enjoyed. It was resulting in a pretty divided split of the movies being good or bad, but there was a trend of him preferring the 2000s cheesy romcoms over any other one, and Mamma Mia was going into that list.
"So, the music was made first, and then the musical was made?"
"Pretty much. Abba was this huge band back in the day, and the movie was also pretty big. I remember hearing something about a sequel being made, it probably released while I was in the coma, though."
"Interesting," Simon slid further down the make-shift back rest they had made with whatever objects they found laying around. "Is romance always like this, though?" His head tilted slightly as he asked the question.
"Not really, the actual romance films include a lot less funny shenanigans."
"No, I mean, back on Earth."
Grace bit the inside of his cheek. This felt like being back in the classroom and having to explain to one of his students that their crush not liking them back was not the end of the world while he himself had just deleted Tinder for the nth time in his adult life. He decided to think about his answer while looking back at his laptop and closing the movie, going over to the video of trees in a forest that was Simon's favorite and playing it.
"Well, movies are sometimes exaggerations of the real human experience. It is a lot more confusing and less straightforward than a movie that needs to fit into a specific run time." Grace leaned back, looking up at the two birds that were perched on a branch of the tree. "There's a lot more awkward first dates that never turn into seconds or having some rose-tinted glasses that won't budge off your eyes no matter what other people do, and a lot of wasting your time in never ending rituals. Once you get past all of that, though, there are some things that feel straight out of a movie. A perfect first kiss, a heartfelt confession, slow dancing in the kitchen, lazy mornings with someone, a perfect proposal, all those things can feel magical with the correct person, but that's finding a needle in a haystack or pure absolute luck."
"Did you ever get one of those movie moments?"
"Not really. My first kiss ever was pretty funny, though."
"What was it like?"
Grace retold the story; he was at a friend's birthday party back when he was thirteen. The day had been filled with running around a backyard, eating pizza, and waiting for the adults to leave them alone so all the guests could start having "actual fun". He was sat in a circle with a half empty bottle of Sprite in the middle. They were meant to play seven minutes in heaven, but the minutes were cut down to three in fear that the host's mom would find them in the walk-in kitchen pantry. Grace remembered being terrified of the idea of kissing someone else because he still hadn't caught the "girl crazy" bug that all of his friends had and he was afraid that it would be an overall disgusting experience, but peer pressure won him over. The bottle hadn't chosen him for almost all rounds and everyone was starting to get bored and the proposition of watching a scary movie was starting to get thrown around more. Someone said that they would do one more round and the game would be over, and lo and behold, the bottled landed on him and Kelly, the girl his best friend had a crush on. There were snickers and giggles at his friend as both of them entered the pantry.
"We just stared at each other, well, I stared at the Pop Tarts that were behind her, but we just stood there, clearly wanting to be anywhere but the pantry of someone else's house. We shook hands on giving each other one singular kiss and then stealing some Pop Tarts. I remember I squeezed my eyes too much and we both wiped our mouths straight after, we did get the Pop Tarts, and a Cosmic Brownie, I'm pretty sure. I don't think Jackson and Kelly ever got together, but he did ask her out to prom, that's a whole other story, though." Grace glanced over at Simon, who had the smallest smile on his lips. "What was your first kiss like?"
"Never had one," Simon admitted in a tone so soft that Grace almost didn't catch it, the small smile dropping from his face.
"You never kissed anyone?" He fully turned to face the other man, who was still staring at the screens that surrounded them. It was way too exaggerated of a reaction, if he was honest, but he just couldn't understand how Simon hadn't ever kissed anyone with him looking like that, in a good way, obviously.
"We uh… we saved ourselves until marriage," Simon admitted, his cheeks turning slightly red as the sentence went on, "and it was all arranged, someone else did it for you."
"That's interesting."
"I was supposed to get married."
"Really?" He did his best attempt at crossing his arms, fully invested and wanting to know more about Eden’s wedding traditions.
"Yeah, we got matched together, she was nice," there was a silence that lasted a little too long. Grace knew what that meant, Simon was thinking about what to say next, if he should drop a new fact about who he was before they had found each other. "The ceremony was going to happen after Filament Station. I remember that I held her hand before we left, there wasn't a spark or anything like that, but it was nice. It kept me a bit sane during the first years in prison." Simon's eyes were soft, his profile turned upwards, focusing on the leaves moving in the air, he was clearly remembering something, a nice memory instead of the usual ones that unfocused his eyes and gave him the slightest frown, trying to hide how upsetting it had been for him to live and remember it.
"Did you love her?" He asked softly, hoping to not pry too much.
"Not really," Simon lightly frowned, tilting his head slightly, "we were too focused on survival, seeing if you made it another day. The only reason you had to get married was in the hopes of procreating, choosing the perfect partner for you biologically more than anything else." Simon fell silent for a second, Grace just let him think. "She was nice, though."
Grace turned on his back, staring at the leaves alongside Simon. There was still so much to know about him, so many memories that Simon would spill out like the pitch drop experiment from his life before he was sent into prison. Grace knew he couldn't force any of the memories out, having had too many headaches himself trying to do that back when he had woken up from the coma. It was like poking a bear with a stick, except that the bear had given him the stick and was dropping subtle queues on when it was the perfect time to poke around without getting on its nerves. And maybe now was the time to retrieve the stick and just stare until the next queue arrived, despite everything in him telling him to do the opposite.
"My mom would sometimes tell me love stories," Simon cut the silence they had found themselves in, "it was all about princesses and princes finding each other and getting married. I remember I told her to stop telling me those stories because I found them stupid, but I understand her now. There is something… comforting about these movies. I know I never got to experience life on Earth, but when I watch them, I like to think that's how life was. Maybe back then life did have all these funny things happening and prioritized having all these perfect romantic moments. I think that sounds nice to believe in."
Grace smiled. It was nice to believe in that.
"When I first met you, I had many ideas about what your personality would be like, but hopeless romantic was not on my list at all."
"What's that?"
"What you just said. Someone that thinks that love is like in the movies."
"Being a hopeless romantic isn't that bad, then."
"Not at all." Grace turned over again, catching Simon staring at him from the corner of his eye, quickly staring at the screens again.
Grace still remembered the first time he laid eyes upon Simon, not like seeing a guy covered in blood head to toe in the middle of a blood mood was something one would forget easily, but Grace remembered seeing him up close. Soft yet sharp features hidden behind teeth and blistered skin, a body full of scars and injuries that only gave him the smallest glimpse of what this man had endured. He did wonder how he would be once he was conscious, hoping that he would be nice, a little voice at the back of his mind telling him that maybe this stranger was left where he was for a reason, that the uneasiness he felt even looking at the reddish moon were his instincts yelling at him to not venture farther because of danger, and the danger was Simon, but all of it left once Simon was awake and conscious. He was soft when he left his guard down, when he didn't notice he was being himself. He was small glances that turned into staring with soft eyes, the smallest smiles that would only tilt one side of his lips upwards, humming tunes gently while doing whatever task he set himself to do, covering himself with the quilt during movie nights and hiding the lower part of his face with it, apologizing to objects whenever he bumped into them and tapping them to make sure they were fine. He was lovely, to put it in simple words, and he deserved to live in a reality that treated him fairly for once, let him live in a romcom where everything was perfect for a moment.
"… don't you think?" Simon turned to look at him. Grace blinked himself back into reality.
"Mhm," he answered as his best guess.
"You weren't listening to me," Simon accused, a small huff leaving his lips. "Incredible," he said in a light tone, not mad that the other man had been too busy day dreaming.
He deserved to be kissed.
"What were you saying?"
"I was saying that it would be nice to have a boring romance movie."
"A boring romance movie?"
"One where there aren't any stakes and things just happen, a boring romance."
"That would be a documentary."
"A boring documentary on romance," he nodded, " just to understand how those movie moments are meant to look like outside of a set."
He deserved to be loved.
"You want to experience a movie moment?"
"How?" Simon's voice became soft.
Grace leaned closer, his eyes darting between Simon's lips and eyes, trying to find any sign that he wasn't poking the bear too much, that he wouldn't end up mauled by doing this. Simon didn't move so he moved in closer and closer, his lips ghosting the other man’s for what must've been a second, but felt like eternity, before closing the gap.
He didn't move, getting a realization that he might've fucked up so bad this would be his final moments alive. Simon didn't move either, which might've been a good sign, maybe he would be spared for a moment longer. Moment long enough for Grace to pull away abruptly, feeling his cheeks burning and his heart rate elevating. He was glad that Rocky had had enough of romcoms and was off somewhere else on the ship to mention anything about his heart acting unusually. Not like the comment would add anything more to this disastrous situation.
"I-I'm sorry, I… I messed it all up, didn't I?" He spat out, all the words merging together and seeming to be just one sound that was accompanied by a nervous chuckle at the end. "I should've asked, I'm sorry, Simon, it was dumb of me to do that and you can—"
Simon kissed him. Brief and quick, enough to make it feel like he got a punch to the gut that sucked all the air out of him. Maybe that's exactly what happened.
"You were never going to shut up," Simon said, a small laugh escaping his lips after. Grace didn't say anything, still unsure if he had actually been punched in the stomach or if this was him feeling butterflies in his stomach for the first time in decades. "Why are you pulling that face?" Simon laughed a bit harder, his cheeks tinting slightly red.
"You're not mad at me?" Amazing thing to say, he thought.
"Why would I be?"
"Because, well… I kissed you! I don't know if you wanted it or if it was the right time, and I should've thought more about it, and—"
"Ryland, you are the densest motherfucker I've ever known," Simon said while he was still rambling, leaning in.
Simon kissed him for a second time. His lips moved over Grace's unsure, treading a terrain they'd never been in before in a careful yet eager manner. Grace decided to help him navigate, even though the motions of kissing someone felt as foreign as the (what definitely were) butterflies in his stomach. If any other human came across them, they would probably point out the messiness and sloppiness of their movements, how they weren't used to being touched nor touching another person in that way, but for Grace it was perfect.
"Holy fuck," Simon pulled away from him after what felt like minutes, taking a big gasp for air, "let me breathe for a moment," he laughed, a smile spreading across his face.
"Sorry," Grace mumbled. Pieces of a puzzle he didn’t even know he was solving connected in his head as he stared at the man. "Wait, so… you wanted me to kiss you?"
"For a while, yes."
"Is that why we were watching so many romcoms?"
"I genuinely like them, but they did give me some ideas," Simon shrugged.
"Wow." Grace stared at the screens again, seeing the same two birds perched on the same branch. The video was looping. "Can I kiss you again? I don't think I did it right the first time."
"You don't even have to ask."
And he kissed him again, trying to make sure he was kissing him right, not like Simon had a standard for them, but Grace wanted to give him all the best experiences he could, adding kisses to the list now. He made sure to cradle his face gently with one hand and not go too far despite something inside him that had been hungry for human touch wanting as much of Simon as he physically could in that moment. He pulled away slowly this time, letting his lips linger over Simon's for a moment.
"There is a second Mamma Mia movie."
"What?" Grace asked, his tone a little too loud for how close they were.
"I saw it when you searched the movie in the laptop, you were too focused talking about Meryl Streep to notice." There was a smile on Simon’s lips that seemed to be holding in laughter.
Grace laughed, head leaning forward and finding an awkward yet comfortable place on Simon's chest. He felt Simon laugh as well, chest heaving up and down while the sound of his laughter resonated in his chest.
"You want to watch it then?" He asked once his laughter died down.
"Obviously."
Grace pulled the laptop close.