Chapter Text
Three months after Ahn Suho woke up, Yeon Sieun found himself adding yet another tab to his ‘coma aftercare’ group on his laptop.
This addition was a blog that listed muscle relief remedies in the same format as the hundreds of other websites Sieun saved, all the way from ‘Recovering from a Coma: Steps and Challenges’ to ‘10 Ways to Make Your Child’s Dentist Appointment a Positive Experience’, the latter coming from a particularly gruelling physical rehabilitation session and a particularly sulky Suho.
Sieun chewed on his chapped lips as he scrolled past the blogger’s backstory, an unnecessary section that he finds annoying for the most part.
He read about ways to massage a person’s calf and how long a muscle ache heating patch should be put on, his eyes scan each letter with a precision that was, in most cases, reserved only for studying. Sieun didn’t know how long he had sat, hunched above his laptop, and only stopped when the blaring light of the screen bested his eyes.
The palms of his hand moved roughly across his eyelids, rubbing with a ferocity that would certainly not do anything good, but the relief makes it all worth it. Eventually, he brought his hands back down and immediately after – a migraine.
He shouldn’t be too surprised, all of this research revealed far too much of how his own body is doing, the sleepless nights and constant stress made him susceptible to all sorts of headaches and random bouts of tiredness.
And.. despite it all, he truly couldn’t bring himself to care.
As he closed his eyes, tearing up both from the lack of moisture and the harsh rubbing, his vision turned from pitch black into a familiar face.
It always happens. Ever since he first saw him in the coma. The sea of black becomes a blank canvas in which his imagination can freely paint on.
However, instead of the usual scene of a limp body on a flimsy hospital bed, he imagines what had occurred just today.
He and Suho were on a walk, just around the hospital, like usual. His progress, or, his entire awakening itself, was nothing short of a miracle, according to every doctor that was within their vicinity. He went from being unable to hold a spoon on his own to being able to stand up in a time frame that was practically unprecedented. Specialists were impressed and nurses cheered.
Only Sieun knew of what happened in the gaps. The recessions, muscle spasms, and pain were all so apparent to him. Sieun, himself, would easily be the happiest person in the room as long as Suho even breathed, but the man in question didn’t share the same sentiment.
They were so close to reaching a new record, an entire 5 minutes of unassisted walking. The tentative steps and arms held out to keep balance were already leagues better than a few weeks ago. Sieun could feel the joy radiating off of Suho, putting one foot in front of the other.
Until his legs just gave up.
Suddenly, his entire body weight was on Sieun, centimetres away from the floor. They ended up having to walk back to his wheelchair with Suho’s arm around Sieun’s shoulder, dragging his feet.
He could still feel the lingering warmth on the side of his body, it wasn’t often Suho simply let himself be supported by him. Thinking about their bodies being so close together made an unfamiliar heat prickle up his neck – it’s stupid to think about. Not related to his progress at all.
-
Sieun always felt that Suho never suited the stale white walls of hospitals. No matter how long he’d been attached to a heart monitor, the vibrancy he emitted was something Sieun couldn’t quite get a grasp on. It’s been a month since Suho last fell – in fact, it’s been a couple of weeks since Suho stopped needing support to walk.
At first it was hard to even call it walking, Sieun felt that it looked more and more like a penguin’s waddling after the nth time Suho rejected any and all support. Now, albeit still quite slow, his strides are beginning to build the confidence that Sieun thought he’d never see again.
They took a brisk walk around the hospital once again. With his rapid improvement, Suho really did believe he’d be able to take a temporary leave for a few hours – unsupervised. The rejection he received left no room to argue.
“I mean, like, seriously, it’s not like I’m going to Busan or something, surely a walk around the place would be good for me, yeah?” Suho huffs in annoyance, the overgrown hair covering his eyes making him look more youthful than he already was. His cheeks got a bit rounder, too – from all Sieun’s efforts to make sure he was eating all the necessary nutrients.
It took another second for Sieun to realise that he was staring at Suho, again. “You’ve already recovered a lot so far. I don’t think it’ll be too long until they allow you.” After Their First Dental Care Appointment: Positive verbal enforcement. “Um. I’m looking forward to it. I like being with you.”
A silence stilled over them, heavy. Sieun didn’t know where to look – settling for the pavement they were walking on. Their steps were in sync.
He couldn’t see Suho’s face, honestly couldn’t even imagine the expression that would be on it at that moment. “Uh… yeah. Me too.” An awkward chuckle escaped from Suho’s lips.
The walk continued in almost complete silence after, a tension that wasn’t necessarily awkward nor comfortable settled over them like a blanket, smothering any opportunity for conversation. Sieun didn’t mind, the warmth emanating from Suho’s animated body being enough for him to be satisfied, and one discreet glance at Suho’s relaxed face told him that, really, words weren’t really necessary for the two of them.
It was just different, him and Ahn Suho. Moments like this would never slide by this easily if he were with Baku– especially if he were accompanied with Gotak too. Though Juntae wasn’t even remotely as lively as Baku, it just wasn’t the same. The hospital doors were only a few metres away now, and Sieun could feel Suho’s growing appetite with each step they took.
-
This is not normal. Sieun doesn’t have to be a specialist in any field except common sense to know that Suho’s recovery is unfathomably fast. It’s been 8 months since Suho woke up and Sieun’s graduation is right around the corner, yet it seems like Suho went 2 years back in time. Not only can Suho walk, Sieun’s confident that somersaults would be light work for him now.
Perhaps for Sieun’s sake, Suho had never done anything drastic while they were together. Sieun was oftentimes reluctant to bring his friends over to visit Suho due to them being new faces, but both sides had pestered him endlessly till now.
Cue, now. In front of Sieun’s eyes lay an exhausted Park Humin and a passed out Ahn Suho on the narrow hospital bed that Sieun had gotten very familiar with. Baku had half of his body hanging off from the foot of the bed, sweat drenching his entire figure.
“Yah, Gotak-ah, please help me… I think Sieun’s planning to skin me dead…” Baku groaned out, cowering under the intense glare of one Yeon Sieun.
“Bro, do you mean skin you alive?” Replied Gotak, standing behind the formidable figure of Sieun with crossed arms.
“No! Sieun won’t be able to resist his instincts and stab me with the knife before skinning me! Then he’ll be disappointed he didn’t hear me scream and skin you alive Gotak! Can’t you totally see it?!”
“You fucking idiot! Why would he go for me when you’re the one who fucking konked a patient on the head like that? If you punched a table, not only would it crack in half, you’d make a damn hole to Earth’s core!”
“Earth has a core?”
“Is your learning curve a damn circle, you moron?” Gotak, defeated by the stupidity of Baku, looked at Juntae for support.
“Baku shouldn’t have hit him on the head like that, but it was Suho who wanted to fight first right? Both of them just got a bit carried away…” Sieun thought they left the window open due to the sound of air in his ear, but it turns out it was just Juntae speaking at the volume of 20 decibels.
“I’m hurt too! That guy actually has machine guns as arms, dude.” A pitiful attempt in currying pity was made by Baku.
“And you have a pistol for a brain.” Said attempt was shut down by Gotak.
Sieun felt another headache forming, though he wants to pummel Baku into the ground, his concern over Suho’s wellbeing presides over that urge. With a low sigh of exasperation, Sieun tells them all, “Can you guys just leave?”.
One by one, the three boys file out. Baku ends up saying an apology as he passed Sieun with Gotak supporting his weight, who also wished for Suho to wake up better. Juntae ends up apologising for not stopping the two before it escalated, and all Sieun could think of was the funeral they would’ve held for him if he tried. With a nod, he closed the door on them and immediately sat down, next to Suho’s bedside.
He had managed to calm down a lot, compared to when the fight ended.
It all started with Suho asking for a light spar – when Baku was showing off his muscles. Sieun, who seemed to be the only one with a working brain, was completely opposed to the prospect of this match leaving the territory of just words. However, after a pleading Baku and Suho, an excited Gotak and a curious Juntae all expressing their wishes to proceed with the fight, he hesitantly agreed.
The only reason he even ended up saying yes was because he could see that Suho was getting frustrated. Frustrated at everything else, but also frustrated that Sieun now depends on Baku for things that used to be Suho’s job. Though he was relieved that Sieun had people he could rely on, it was hard for him to not be one of them anymore.
Suho was strong. Strong enough to fight his body against all odds, but he could be Superman and Sieun would still prefer for him to never have to raise his fists again. There was a deep desire in him to protect his best friend, to wrap him up in a blanket and slowly pat the boy until all his troubles disappeared in his beats.
Sieun tugged the thin blanket over Suho’s chest and methodically tapped the unconscious hand with his pointer finger, his gaze fixed onto the glint of Suho’s jaw.
Unlabeled emotions brewed up inside of him, climbing up his throat and threatening to spill out. The scene of Suho motionless on the grass of the hospital overlapped with the body in the boxing ring aligning in perfect disharmony. Had Juntae not stopped him from running towards Baku, red would’ve stained the green blades of flora under them.
Words and not fists were used to resolve the problem, a conflict being narrowly avoided with a Baku on his knees and many, many apologies.
Sieun stares at the part of Suho’s head that was struck. He stared and stared and stared. A pair of eyes stared back at him.