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We’re sitting on the couch and I’m curled up into Mirios side. He turns the tv off as the movie we were watching ends. “There’s something I need to tell you,” I say pulling away. Figuring now would be a good time for this.
“Oh. Um me too. Something I meant to tell you earlier but then we had such a nice dinner and I didn’t want to ruin anything,” ruin anything? What. Wait is he planning on leaving me?
I swallow hard. “You can go first then,” he nods.
“I’m leaving,” Mirio says and my heart stops. Though I don’t know why when I knew this was coming eventually. “My agency is sending me on this classified op. I really can’t tell you anything besides the fact that I’ll be radio silent. It shouldn’t be more than a month or two,” he explains. I look down at my lap. Clasping my hands together so he doesn’t notice that they’re shaking.
“When?” I ask,
“Tomorrow. I know it’s short notice, but I promise that I only just found out today,” I look away. Becuase if I don’t I might cry and I don’t want him to see me cry. “But what were you going to tell me?”
“It can wait,”
“You sure?” He asks. I nod.
“Alright,” we go to bed shortly after that and when I wake up he’s gone. Probably didn’t want to wake me up. Usually it doesn’t bother me. But usually I know he’ll be home that night. Now he’s gone and I’m carrying His pup safe inside of me and he doesn’t know.
In fact no one knows because I wanted to tell him first and now I don’t know what to do and I know I need to tell fat gum soon so he can take me off of patrol and put me behind a desk for the time being but still.
I want my alpha. I roll onto my side and stare at the empty side of the bed. His side. One hand is tucked under my pillow the other is resting on my still flat stomach. “Guess it’s just me and you then,” I say quietly.
Eventually the nausea kicks in and I have to get up to throw up in the bathroom then I rinse out my mouth and brush my teeth. A month or two without him I can do that.
I’m only about six weeks anyway so it’s fine.
Well a month turns into two and I can hardly keep anything down and my instincts are screaming and I’m currently on my couch with my face buried into Hado’s shoulder. Her beta scent doing nothing at all to help. She’s aware I’m pregnant cause I told her because I needed to tell someone besides my boss and she felt right. “I’m sure he’s coming home soon,” she reassures.
My instincts are telling me that he abandoned me. He hasn’t even marked me yet. It isn’t something we’ve talked about. What if he doesn’t want me? What if he has another omega and there was no mission and went to run off with that omega?
What if I have to raise this pup alone? This pup who may very well end up looking like him. What do I do then? I cry harder into her shoulder as she continues to comfort me but she still isn’t Mirio.
Another month passes and still nothing except now I’m four months along still can’t keep much down and I’m starting to show. I stare at my reflection in the mirror. Then turn so I can look at my side profile. You can tell I’m showing more that way. I smile slightly.
The pup is just making itself known. Though according to my doctor it is measuring a bit small but she didn’t seem concerned by it. I take a picture to document it. Something Hado recommend I do. She said I should print out pictures and put it in a book and document each stage. I like that idea so yeah I stole it.
I pull my shirt back down and throw my phone onto the bed. Well more so the nest that I’ve made out of Mirio’s things. I don’t think he would mind. I mean I hope he wouldn’t. He wouldn’t have left me his things if he didn’t want me to turn it into nesting material.
That’s what alphas do to take care of their omega.
God, what has gotten into me? And don’t say hormones. Cause that’s not it. Alright? It isn’t.
Another two months and I’m six months along. I waddle more when I walk and I’ve started wearing his clothes. I’m painting one wall of the nursery a yellow. Mostly because it reminds me of Mirio while Hado is trying to put the crib together.
“Why do they need five different size screws? Also why is the Allen wrench so small? I have small hands I can hardly hold this,” she fusses.
“Because the industry is against you Nejire,”
“It’s not my pup,” she reminds me as I begin another stroke.
“No, put this is your godpup,” I kind of made her the godmother of the pup without asking Mirio but also he isn’t here and she has been. I may not be looking at her but I know her well enough to know that she rolled her eyes.
Just then the pup kicks. Shes been doing that more lately. Oh did I mention I’m having a girl? “Anyway, I thought you had a date with that guy,” I say trying to make conversation.
“We broke up. Apparently he doesn’t think women can be heros,” she explains.
“Sounds like he’s the dismal in distress then,” she laughs at that.
“Right,”
Two months later im eight months pregnant and I haven’t gotten out of bed in two days because my alpha has abandoned me and my pup isn’t going to have a dad. I want Mirio but he isn’t coming back. If he was he would be back by now.
I don’t care what Hado keeps telling me. She’s wrong. She’s only saying it to make me feel better.
He’s Not coming Back and I really shouldn’t had expected otherwise. I mean why would he? He’s sunshine and I can’t talk to people I don’t know most days. Well more like all days.
I’m a pathetic loser while he’s amazing and I’m nothing and he’s not here. And I want him so badly that it hurts.
A month later I have the pup and decide to name her Amaya. He doesn’t get to choose the name. He isn’t here. He abandoned. Me and her.
Four months pass when there’s a knock at me door late one night after I finish feeding Amaya. I kiss the top of her head before laying her down and then I leave the nursery and go to the front door and I pull it open. My eyes narrow when I see that it’s Mirio.
I slam the door in my face. He left me. Why the hell is he here. “Tamaki what’s wrong? Let me in,” I don’t I walk away and then hes opening the door. Right he has a key. I forgot about that. “Hey what’s wrong?”
“You left me,” I say quietly.
“Well yeah. I was on a mission and it lasted way longer than expected and I mean-“ I interrupt him and turn to face him.
“Thirteen months Mirio. Thirteen! And you abandoned me! Your pup grew inside me for nine months! And I have been taking care of her on my own for four of those! You left me! You left us!” I shout. Waking Amaya.
Fuck. I go into the Nursery and immediately pick her up out of her crib and start rocking her. “It’s ok. I’m sorry,”
“Wait pup?” Mirio asks and I look up to see him standing in the door way staring at the bundle in my arms.
“Yeah, I was going to tell you but then you said you were leaving and then you abandoned me for thirteen months,” he closes his eyes.
“I didn’t know. God if I knew I wouldn’t have taken the mission,”
“Don’t lie,” he steps closer. And I turn my back to him. Sheilding the now sleeping Amaya from him.
“I’m not. I didn’t mean to abandon you. I never would or will ever abandon you. You’re mine. And fuck. I should have marked you by now. I should have but I didn’t think you wanted that,”
“You didn’t ask,” I whisper. It’s quiet for a moment. “Can I hold her?” I nod and help him hold her And my heart melts at the sight. My omega practically purring. “Still mad?” He asks.
“No,” I admit.
“Good. Cause I’m never leaving you or her again. Or any other pups we may have,” I raise an eyebrow.
“More?” He smiles.
“You don’t really think I only want one do you?” I blush immediately and hide my face in my arm. “There he is,” he teases.
“Shut up,” I mumble.
“I love you too,” and yeah I do love that sunshine idiot. And he’s mine and she is ours. That’s all I’ll ever need I think.