Work Text:
The knocks were frantic.
Neither AJ nor Ghostie even had time to move to the door before it was swung open.
“What the fuck did you do?”
Megii, AJ realised.
Her eyes were crazy — big and worried, slightly wet, and for the first time in AJ’s time in the Academy, Megii looked genuinely disturbed. Her hands shook as she pushed open the door while her voice cracked.
“Seriously, AJ? What the fuck did you tell her?” Megii yelled, stepping further into Ghostie’s dorm.
AJ’s ex just stood there, frozen, not knowing what to do. She didn’t know what was going on, how could she know what to do?
AJ, though? She knew exactly why Megii was here.
The injured girl looked down, away from Megii. She was all wrapped up in bandages. Ghostie had spent all night cleaning the blood off her, picking the dried twigs and leaves on her body off from AJ’s sleep in the Lavender field. The Mage even fed AJ. Bringing her sips of water and bites of food that AJ tried to decline, but ended up having anyways.
“Megii—” Ghostie whispered, meeting Megii in the middle of the room.
AJ could not bear to look at her. To reply, even. No amount of bandages or food could stop the physical decay of her heart.
Megii did not seem to care about Ghostie’s defence.
“You know, AJ, I gave you a lot of grace.” The Woodland Mage hissed at her. “I listened to you when you asked me not to tell Drift about your powers. I kept my mouth shut whenever you did something cruel or, or suspicious. Because she liked you. Because I trusted you!”
“Megii, please…” Ghostie begged her, stepping between AJ and the Mage.
“No!” She cried out. “She’s gone, isn’t she?”
AJ couldn’t move.
Her body had been close to paralysed since she collapsed in Ghostie’s room. Shock, maybe, or simply tired from the events of the last two days.
Or maybe she was just decaying.
She was the Decay Mage, after all.
“AJ, I swear to God, if you don’t answer me—”
“I’m serious, Megii—”
“I don’t fucking care!” She turned back to look at AJ after glaring at Ghostie. “She left. And I know you had something to do with it. I just know it.”
No one said anything, and it dawned on AJ that the two were waiting for her to reply. To defend herself, her actions. Explain. Explain.
What was there to explain?
It was simple.
AJ never cared for Drift.
Five, simple, fine, normal words.
AJ was her name. That was a normal word. Everyone in the Academy used it, they just couldn’t keep AJ’s name out of their mouths.
Never. Never say never. Neverland. Common word, as well.
Cared. Past tense of care. How many times had students in this Academy said they cared for each other? That they care? A million times, right? That was a normal word, too!
For. Easy. It’s in, like, every sentence.
But then there was the worst word. The word, the name, the fucking lie, that AJ couldn’t swallow. She couldn’t take this pill. It was big, and painful, and it hurt. It hurt like a lie hurt.
Things drift away. Drift is a normal word. It’s not common, not used often, but it’s still normal. Present in every dictionary, probably.
Rynn, though?
By all definitions, not a normal word. It wasn’t even in the damn sentence, and it haunted it.
AJ never cared for Drift.
Simple. Five words. Common.
But if it was so simple, how come AJ was falling over herself just to believe it?
“What’s wrong with her?”
“I don’t know. She’s just— in her own head.”
“Well, get her the fuck out of it.”
“Megii.”
“I’m serious. She’s gone, Ghostie. Gone! She could be kidnapped, or— or dead, and—”
“She’s not dead.”
AJ didn’t even realise it was her own voice speaking, until a couple moments later. When she wondered how Ghostie would be so sure that Drift was alive. Well, Ghostie wouldn’t know. Which meant AJ said it. Right?
She sniffed, looking up from the floor. Into Megii’s eyes, for the first in this confrontation.
“What happened to my best friend, AJ?” She spoke carefully. The two stared at each other — AJ’s eyes empty, and Megii’s full of everything. “What did you do to her?”
Something slid down AJ’s cheek. It tickled, and felt wet. The ceiling must be linking.
“I hurt her.” She whispered, watching as Megii’s eyes dilated. “I told her everything.”
“...What counts as everything?” Megii asked. Her voice was on a tightrope, and one light brush of wind woud send her toppling off.
AJ just couldn’t— she had to know. “Did you know?”
“Know what?” Megii still looked angry.
“Her identity.”
The Mage in front of AJ blinked, as if she wasn’t expecting that. “Oh.”
“You were her best friend. She would have told you.”
Megii swallowed, and looked up and down at AJ warily. “She did. Did she tell you?”
AJ scoffed, then sniffed. “No. I… found out. Her name’s Rynn. Did you know that? Princess Rynn.”
Next to Megii came a gasp.
Honestly, AJ forgot Ghostie was even here. “Drift’s the missing Princess?” She asked, glancing between AJ and Megii. “Oh my God.”
They both ignored her.
Slowly, Megii shook her head. “I never knew her real name. Only Scott, Shelby, and I, knew. At least… I think so.”
“Not me?”
“She was working up to it. I think she thought you would hate her.”
Damn it.
God fucking damn it, AJ.
Something else slid down her other cheek. It tickled.
“Do you? Hate her? Is that…” Megii sniffed, and looked away at the floor. “Did you guys fight over it?”
Did you guys fight over it?
Fighting is defined as using physical force, a strong argument, or a hard effort to win, stop something, or deal with a problem.
Did AJ fight over it?
There was no physical force, no tangible argument, exactly, either. A hard effort to win? What was she winning? Drift leaving? That didn’t feel like a damn prize.
It also wasn’t hard. It was simple. Easy. Nice.
Because AJ didn’t care for Drift.
So, it was easy. It wasn’t hard.
Then, was AJ trying to stop something? Deal with a problem?
Yes. But— Drift wasn’t the problem. She wasn’t what AJ was trying to stop.
There was no back-and-forth, no debate. Just yelling and hurting. Did that qualify as a fight?
Well, Drift fought for her to stay. Begged for it.
“Does it count as a fight if only one of us was fighting?” AJ spoke bitterly. She tried to joke, laugh, a bit, maybe chuckle, but her throat was too sore.
“Who was fighting?”
That made AJ laugh. “I don’t know! I don’t even fucking know!”
“How do you not know?” Megii repeated, her eyes going a bit crazy again, and voice rising. “You were fucking there, AJ!”
“I know I was! I know I was there!” She yelled back, still laughing. “And I don’t even know what I did!”
“Bullshit.”
“I’m not lying. I did everything. I knew what would hurt her most, and I said it, okay, Megii? Is that what you want to hear?” AJ began sobbing, but chuckling throughout. “That I went to that field intending to push her away forever?”
Megii was crying as well now, her eyes getting redder with every second. “Why did you do that, AJ? God— fucking why?”
Sobs racked her chest, and AJ took a moment to reply. To gather her thoughts. “I had to.”
“No, you didn’t.”
“I did. I had to.”
“You had to run her away from the Academy?”
“Yes! No, I mean. No. I…” She used the back of her hand to wipe a tear away from her cheek. “I didn’t want her here, anymore.”
Megii looked disgusted.
Confused, but absolutely appalled. “Excuse me?”
“I never… I never cared for her. I wanted to hurt her.”
“You’re lying.”
“No, I’m not.”
“Yes, you are, AJ! You literally told me that you didn’t want Drift to hate you. Muliple times!”
“Yeah, well, I lied. It was fun. That was it.”
No one had ever looked at AJ with so much contempt. With so much anger, disgust, hatred.
“Did you tell Drift that?” Megii deadpanned.
AJ could only nod.
“And that you knew about her identity?”
She gave her another sad nod.
“And what about the burying? Did you at least tell her that it almost killed you? That hurting her kept you up at night? Like you told me?”
If I’m so weak, why was it so easy to bury you?
“Not like that.” AJ admitted. She was tired of laughing, of crying.
“So, you lied to her.”
“No. I never cared for Drift.”
AJ never cared for Drift.
“Keep fucking telling yourself that.”