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The morning is still cold despite the fact that it’s already spring, but the sun starts getting stronger with each day. Jungkook closes his eyes and lets the sun rays to warm his face. He hums the melody of the song he's been listening to these past few days. He likes the sweetness of the singer's voice. His name is Jin, if Jungkook recalls correctly. He had discovered him recently and frankly said, knows nothing about him, because he only listens to several of Jin’s songs to which he really likes to sing along, as he embarrassingly realizes when somebody taps on his shoulder.
"...se me," a man next to him says. He looks like as if he was running all the way here; he’s out of breath and his face is sweating.
Jungkook takes off his headphones. "I'm sorry, what did you say?"
"Excuse me," the man says again and takes a deep breath in while he bends over in exhaustion, "the bus - thirty two - did it already go?"
"N-No, I'm still waiting for it," Jungkook stutters out.
“Uh, that’s good,” the man breathes out. “I’ve thought that I’ve missed it.”
Jungkook nods, turns away from him and puts back on his headphones. “It’s alright. You came on time.”
✻✻✻
July isn’t supposed to be like this, Jungkook swears. It’s raining nonstop for five days in a row, and maybe it wouldn’t bother him as much if his bus were on time. The point is, it isn’t.
So here he is, waiting under the roof of the bus stop, thinking something not very pretty about the weather forecast who claimed that it should be sunny today, when he meets the out-of-breath man again.
Actually, he doesn’t recognize him at first. It’s only a distressed question (which he almost doesn’t hear) from behind his back, immediately reminding him the man.
“Excuse me, the bus thirty two is-”
“Late as always,” Jungkook turns to the source of a familiar voice.
“I’m lucky,” says the man, visibly relieved.
Jungkook smiles and instead of an answer gives him thumbs up.
“Oh, thanks.” The man laughs and shoots a finger gun back.
✻✻✻
Jungkook starts to see the man more often. He’s not on the bus stop every day, but whether it’s because he’s always late or he just doesn’t need to ride a bus is a question which Jungkook doesn’t feel a need to think about.
Jungkook is observing. Whenever is the man on the bus stop, he can’t help it but watch him. There is usually nothing special about him, but the more Jungkook is watching, the more details he notices.
Sometimes is the man reading cooking books. Yeah, the actual cooking books in which he’s making bookmarks. On other days he’s eating (Why? Can’t he eat at his home?), taking bites so big that they stuff his mouth full.
Even today is the man happily eating, his cheeks so big that it’s not even possible. It’s cute, hamster-like. The man catches Jungkook’s look and stops in the middle of chewing.
Damn. Jungkook quickly changes the direction of his gaze to not look weird.
“Hey,” the man says. What? Why is talking to Jungkook? Why would he talk to a stranger? That’s weird, that’s not how it works in a big city- “What are you looking at?”
“At you.” Jungkook was never talented when it came to words.
The man looks him over and says, “Of course. I’m handsome, right?”
“ What? ”
“Heh,” the man snickers, “it’s okay. No biggie.”
Jungkook is speechless and when the man reaches his hand to him, he stares at it without knowing how to react. “I’m Seokjin. What’s your name?”
“My name is Jungkook,” Jungkook mumbles.
“Nice to meet you.”
“N-Nice to meet you too.”
“From now on, stop staring at me, okay?”
“O-Okay,” Jungkook says but isn’t sure if he’s able to keep his word.
✻✻✻
“What do you like to listen to?” Seokjin asks one fine day when they’re waiting for their delayed bus.
Jungkook looks up from his phone’s screen. He is took a little bit by surprise, but strangely he doesn’t mind. He says, “Ballads, mostly. And EDM.”
“Why do you like ballads?”
“Well.” Jungkook thinks about the answer for a second. “I can sing to it.”
“Do you like singing?” Seokjin asks, interest sparkling in his voice.
Jungkook fidgets. “Yeah, um, I do.” He scratches his nose. “It’s not like… You know. I sing in the shower. Nothing else.
“That’s pretty cool, Jungkook! And cute. Don’t be ashamed, I like to sing as well. I actually like to pretend sometimes that I’m singing on stage.” Seokjin rubs his neck.
“Wow. Do you want to become famous?” Jungkook jokingly asks.
“Who wouldn’t? My singing isn’t that great, really. It’s impossible anyway.” Seokjin laughs and changes topic. “Why EDM?”
“I can dance to it,” Jungkook says without hesitation this time.
“Dance?” Seokjin stiffly and hilariously imitates a traffic officer. “Like this? Woah, you’re a man of many talents.”
“You’ve never seen me doing anything else than waiting here,” Jungkook complains, “I can do better.”
Seokjin chuckles. “Sorry.” He tilts his head. “Dancing is fun. I used to dance for a while back when I was younger.”
“Why did you stop?”
Seokjin casts down his eyes. “They told I’m not good enough.”
“Did you stop just because somebody told you that you’re not good enough? Seokjin, that’s absurd. You’re dancing for yourself, not for other people.”
Seokjin sighs. “Yeah, I guess.”
Jungkook regrets his fiery remark seeing how uncomfortable Seokjin got. It’s better to stay in your line. He doesn’t say anything then to not upset Seokjin more and decides that it’s better to not even try to restart the conversation. He takes out headphones from his pocket and searches for some songs he haven’t listened to in a while. He chooses Jin’s latest song, sets it to play on repeat and lets his mind wander off while he listens to Jin’s voice. But even though he had listened to this song so many times, Jungkook still wants to hear it over and over again. I can’t fly like the flower petals over there…
✻✻✻
“Jungkook, are you listening to that song again? ” Seokjin ask when he peeks over Jungkook’s shoulder.
Jungkook can feel his cheeks flushing and quickly hides his phone in his pocket. “Yeah.”
Seokjin shakes his head. “You listen to it every single day. That’s too much.”
Jungkook bites his lip. Who the heck cares about to what he listens to? “What about it? I really like the singer’s voice, that’s all,” he mumbles.
Seokjin seems a little bit surprised, but he quickly says with sass and huge smile, “Jungkook, are you his fanboy? ”
“Do you mind?” Jungkook asks bitterly.
Seokjin shrugs. “I don’t. I don’t get why do you like him though? He’s not that great. His high notes are off.”
A wave of anger washes over Jungkook. “I don’t think that he’s bad at all. His voice is great and I love his lyrics.”
Seokjin blinks and seems speechless for a minute. “He probably uses a lot of autotune anyway,” he says finally and his voice sounds spuriously calm. “What do you call a fish that needs help with his or her vocals?”
“I don’t know,” Jungkook says with disinterest.
“Autotuna.” Seokjin laughs loudly and seems to be pretty happy about his joke. Jungkook can’t laugh because he’s a little bit offended (he may be a fanboy after all, he thinks when he remembers all the times when he raved about Jin’s music in front of Seokjin) and stays silent. Seokjin suddenly stands there looking so awkward and helpless, that Jungkook starts to feel sorry and laughs quietly too.
“That’s a good one.”
Seokjin smiles. “You look handsome when you smile,” he says. Jungkook opens his eyes wide open and Seokjin’s happy expression falls down. “I mean- I’m sorry.”
“...It’s alright. Thank you,” Jungkook smiles and casts his eyes down.
A compliment from your friend definitely isn’t something you should think about too much, Jungkook decides after he replays the scene in his head for whole day.
✻✻✻
Jungkook prays for the cold winter wind to stop hitting him, promising a lot of things in exchange, even though it’s a laughable idea. He breathes on his hands in an attempt to warm them up, but it’s pretty much useless, so he better hides them in the pockets. The bus should already come, but it’s not here yet, dammit. Only a little bit of snow and so much problems in the traffic.
Jungkook kicks, out from pure boredom, a small snow ball lying on the concrete before him. It flies several metres until it stops near a bench. Jungkook doesn’t pay too much attention to it and is about to turn his look away from it, but suddenly a box falls on the bench. Jungkook looks at the person who has had dropped it and he opens his eyes wide open. It’s Seokjin. He sports a big smile and is happily chatting on his phone.
He doesn’t want to pry, but he still finds himself listening to what Seokjin says.
“...soon. Yeah. Wait for me. Don’t you dare to come out from the house or you won’t ever get healthy again,” Seokjin laughs. He’s standing with his back turned in Jungkook’s direction. Jungkook admires his broad shoulders for a little bit longer than he should, because he soon realizes that Seokjin has already ended his call and is now looking at him. Jungkook tries to act as if he hadn’t looked at Seokjin, but his attempt is unsuccessful because Seokjin is already waving at him and smiling widely while greeting him, “Hi!”
“Um, hi,” Jungkook greets Seokjin back and comes closer to him. “How are you? I haven’t seen you in a while.”
“I’m pretty well, but my boyfriend is sick. I couldn’t visit him for some time.”
“Your boyfriend?” The questions slips out from Jungkook’s mouth against his will. He bites his lip. He’s so careless.
“Yes, my boyfriend,” Seokjin says and his tone is a little bit less bright than it was a few seconds ago. “Do you mind?”
Jungkook hesitates a little bit. “...No, I don’t. I’m sorry.”
“Alright.” Seokjin smiles again. He doesn’t say anything else and Jungkook clearly feels the slightly unfriendly atmosphere.
“Is he better now?” he asks to break the awkward silence.
“Yeah, he’s good. I’m bringing him food,” Seokjin gesticulates towards the box, “he can’t cook for shit. I want him to eat well when he’s sick.”
“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean anything… you know.”
“It’s alright, it’s alright,” Seokjin says in softer voice. “Now tell me, how’s your bae?” Jungkook must have a weird expression, because Seokjin laughs and hits him slight in the shoulder. “That Jin.”
“Ah, Jin.” Jungkook smiles. “I’ve heard that he’s gonna release new single. I’m excited. Did you listen to him? I wish I had a voice like him.”
“Do you?” Seokjin asks and grabs his box, hardly fitting under his arm, when the bus shows up and turns around the corner.
“I want to attend his concert, but he never does any shows. Actually, nobody even knows how he does look like.”
Seokjin shakes his head. “What a weird guy.”
“Hey, don’t say that,” Jungkook gets angry, making Seokjin laugh again. “I get it, maybe he just doesn’t want to show his face to the public.”
“Maybe he’s ugly. Not everyone is as handsome as I am.”
Jungkook doesn’t respond to it, only flashes a polite smile and internally agrees that, yeah, nobody is as handsome as Seokjin is.
✻✻✻
Jungkook bought a shitty umbrella. That’s the result of his angry thought train he comes to when he fights with the umbrella’s weak construction against the wind-driven rain. While gritting teeth, he makes his way towards the bus stop.
The umbrella blocks his view and that’s why he doesn’t notice a person standing there. In the single moment when the rain isn’t forced against him by the wind, he lifts his umbrella to straighten his neck and to relieve the pain from the crouching all the way here.
It’s Seokjin, and even though Jungkook can’t see him clearly from the distance to the stop, he notices how tired and angry he looks. His hair is messy and wet and his hands put in the pockets of his hoodie give away that he indeed didn’t bring any umbrella.
Jungkook never pries into other people’s lives. No matter how much they look hurting, he never interferes and only thinks about how to help them. He always manages to stay away from other people’s business, so why does it hurt to see Seokjin like this?
Seokjin hadn’t come in months and Jungkook wonders why. If he asked, would Seokjin tell him why? Probably not, but it’s okay, they’re not close anyway and it’s kind of weird to get fixed on somebody whom you see only once in a few months, right?
But Jungkook wants to ask. He wants to ask why is Seokjin feeling down, what can he do to make him smile. He shouldn’t pry. It’s not his business. Even after thinking these thoughts over and over, Jungkook can’t help it but feel bad when he sees Seokjin sad and angry, looking withdrawn and gloomy on an empty bus stop in the middle of the rain.
They greet each other when Jungkook comes to the stop, but neither of them try to do some small-talk. They’re waiting for the bus, but even with passing cars and heavy rain it’s so awfully quiet. Jungkook is monotonously kicking the ground, occasionally glancing at Seokjin who’s looking straight ahead, totally ignoring Jungkook’s presence.
The bus comes and frees Jungkook from the discomfort. He lets Seokjin first in while he shakes the water off his umbrella. Seokjin buys his ticket and storms to the back seats where they usually sit together.
Should he go and sit next to him? Seokjin didn’t want to talk to Jungkook, it’s probably better to not bother him, Jungkook judges. He tries to not think too much about it and takes an empty seat in the front. He realizes only seconds later that he’s facing Seokjin. He knows that Seokjin isn’t looking at him, but he still rather stares on his shoes than he would risk to lift his eyes just in case Seokjin is gazing at him. A quick glance assures him that Seokjin doesn’t, but still.
The voice announcing the place to which Jungkook travels wakes him up. He must have doze off. Fuck, he needs to get out before the bus starts moving, but somehow he finds himself walking in the back part of the bus. He’s squeezing the umbrella, the shitty umbrella he had bought and which he hates, but it’s still something what had saved him from bathing in his own clothes on the streets.
Seokjin is leaning against the window. He has closed eyes and seems to be asleep. Jungkook opens his mouth to say something, but decides that it’s better to not say anything, because he doesn’t know any comforting words.
Seokjin must be cold, but Jungkook can’t warm him up nor he can dry his wet clothes (what a foolish thought), so he simply leaves his umbrella next to sleeping Seokjin. The sudden sound of alarm going off before closing the door makes him immediately leave without looking back. When the bus drives off, Jungkook facepalms. Fuck, what was he thinking?
✻✻✻
“Can I take the seat?”
Seokjin’s voice wakes Jungkook up from his sleepy morning trans. He didn’t expect Seokjin at all, because Seokjin didn’t show up in a few months, and he does double check to make sure that it really is Seokjin, not a dream. “Uh, sure,” he groans.
Seokjin tries to sit down beside him, but the bus’ movement forces him into the seat and he bumps into Jungkook. “They should wait until people sit down, really! Not everybody can find a seat before they go,” Seokjin loudly complains like an old man. It takes Jungkook by surprise and looks at Seokjin by his side. Seokjin looks only mildly angry though and Jungkook sees that he’s sitting there a little bit uneasy. “Thanks for this.” Seokjin searches in his bag, takes out Jungkook’s umbrella and handles it to him.
“Um, thanks…?” Jungkook almost doesn’t remember it at first, but when he does, damn, he’s embarrassed. “Did it help?”
Seokjin bitterly laughs. “Not really, no.” He plays with a tag on his bag for a second. “I wanted to return it to you, but I broke up with my boyfriend and didn’t have any real reason to take the bus anymore.”
“I’m sorry.”
“No, no, I’m sorry… I really don’t know why I’m saying it to you. I mean - I had a reason, I wanted to see you, I just… Didn’t know how to approach you. I’m sorry about that.”
Jungkook blinks. Things are starting to get weird, nor does it help that a man standing nearby starts to eye them with strange look. “I don’t understand,” Jungkook finally mutters.
“Shit, why do I have to be awkward all the time,” Seokjin mumbles and shifts in his seat. “Jungkook, you were the only one who supported me. My ex, my dad, they never liked the idea of me becoming a singer. They thought that it’s a waste of time, that I’m not good enough. But then I’ve met you and you never said anything bad, you know? You were even supportive and… Maybe I just like the idea of someone liking my work, but… You were so nice. I really, really love that.” The way Seokjin emphasizes the word love makes Jungkook nervous. He doesn’t know what to say, his mouth is dry and palms sweaty, he’s fully awake now. Thankfully Seokjin doesn’t expect any answer and instead pulls out a CD plastic case from the bag. “It’s pretty weird, right?” Seokjin softly laughs. “But since we have first met, your enthusiasm made me want to pursue my dream.” He handles the case to frozen Jungkook. “I want you to listen to it.”
“What is it?” Jungkook turns the case in his hands and is about to open it, but Seokjin stops him.
“Open it at home, not here.”
“Why?”
Seokjin scratches his head. “It’s better that way.” He awkwardly giggles and gets up. “I-I should leave. Let me know if… If you want. Bye,” he says and leaves the bus without giving Jungkook a chance to ask what the hell he means.
Jungkook is puzzled. He doesn’t get why Seokjin would give him a CD . He lifts it closer to his eyes to inspect it. The case is nothing special. There is a paper in the see-through front, but Jungkook can’t figure out what it is. Alright then. He hides it in his backpack.
✻✻✻
Nervousness is clutching Jungkook’s stomach. He finally got home after a chaotic day. He wasn’t thinking about anything else than the CD though, so the first thing he does is to sit the fuck down and open it.
He fights with the case and when he finally manages to open it, a paper flies out and falls on the ground. Jungkook’s attention though takes the handwritten note on the inner side of the cover.
“Thank you for believing in me. We didn’t talk a lot, but it still was plenty enough to make me happy. I want to make you happy too. Well, I’m going to, right? Who wouldn’t like my singing? It’s the best.”
Jungkook reads it again. And again, just to make sure he sees right, but yeah, right under the message is Jin’s (fucking Jin’s) signature and a phone number.
He was so stupid. He was seeing Jin for the whole time and couldn’t recognize him?!
Jungkook wants to slap himself for not recognizing somebody who’s supposedly his idol. Was it because of his voice? Because Seokjin speaks loudly and more animatedly than Jin who sings softly and emotionally? Darn it.
Jungkook doesn’t wait any second and dials the number. His hand holding the phone is shaking and he considers hanging up when even after a minute Jin - Seokjin - isn’t picking up.
“Hello? Kim speaking.”
Is his last name Kim? There’s so many things Jungkook doesn’t know about Seokjin. “Hello, it’s Jungkook,” he says eagerly.
“Ah, Jungkook.” Seokjin sounds happy. “So, did you listen to my CD?”
“I…” Jungkook bites his lip. “I forgot, I’m sorry.”
“What? Then why are you calling me?”
Is it going to sound too cheesy? “I just want to let you know that you made me happy.”
Seokjin laughs. “But you haven’t listened to the CD.”
“You made me happy before you gave me any CD. And you still do.”
Seokjin takes his time before he replies, “Thank you. It means a lot to me.”
After that, there’s a pause. Not knowing what to say, Jungkook asks, “Will we meet tomorrow at the bus stop?” Then he adds, “Only if you want to.”
“I would like to,” Seokjin says. “But under a condition.”
“What condition?”
“You’re gonna listen to that fucking CD.”
“Alright,” Jungkook laughs. “Alright.”
Only later when he finally ‘listens to that fucking CD’ (Jin’s new single with a secret romantic track not to be found anywhere else), Jungkook’s gaze lands on the paper who had fallen out when he first opened the case. He lifts it off the ground. It’s a ticket. A ticket for a live show scheduled on September first with Jin as the main star.
Jungkook doesn’t know if it’s only a coincidence or not, if Seokjin had planned this (How could he?), but he’s now very sure about his birthday plans.