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“You sure you wanna do this, man?”
“You think I’m willing to back down, scarper, retreat, after you have insulted my honour?! Absolutely preposterous, Susan! Prepare to lose. Duel!”
“Whatever. Duel.”
S-4000/B-4000
To be honest, Susie was more amused by Berdly’s reaction than anything. She’d been hearing his self-important drone in the background all lunch, bragging about his new deck to anyone who would listen- willingly or otherwise- and telling him he couldn’t duel for shit was no understatement after he lost to Kris’ single darkner last week, loopholes and ‘underhanded, wavedash-like strategy’ be damned. So here she was, ready to clean the bird’s clock.
“Keeping your starting hand?” She propped up her head with one paw, lazily staring off to the side. She was actually kinda tired, but you also had to get the mind games started early.
“Of course, there’s not a single combination that could steer me wrong. I play the gallant Kingphisher (1800/1400), the Defensive Quillblades equipment, one face-down, and activate the field rune Firing Wall. Better not lose your monsters, Susan, or you’ll be taking extra damage.”
“K. Just so you know, I can read the cards.” Drawing her sixth, Susie tuned out the nerd’s spluttering and thought through her hand. Where Were was too risky too early, Thrash Flame needed another part, +Guts should be saved to survive a worse darkner than Kingphisher- there we go. “Impolite Hatstand (200/2000) in Defence, placing Mane Ax on the field. Facedown and pass.” Berdly’s eyes flared. Bingo. She’d had nothing to tank Kingphisher’s attack, but it seemed he didn’t have anything to break Hatstand’s defence.
“Ahem. I draw, and equip Defensive Quillblades to Kingphisher, switch it to defence mode, then bring out Taskat (800/800) in defence and end my turn.”
“If you want a stalling match, I’ll give you a stalling match, I guess.” Taskat was a worry, though. Cyber World specialised in series’ of low-level darkners that could summon upgraded forms from the deck once enough were on the field, and he only needed a second to summon Taskat Manager. But Susie’s own eyes sparked when she drew her next card, and she sniggered out loud.
“Using the ability Fuel Warning, I play Thrash Flame (1000/500) and Thrash Treads (1000/500) at once, combining them into the awesome Thrash Machine (2300/1000). And I don’t care that I can’t attack this turn, because with the Mane Ax equipped for seven hundred more, there’s no way you get through this much attack power.”
Berdly was clearly sweatdropping as he drew, placed down Chain Mail- Susie grinned, and beckoned until he gritted his beak and pushed it over to her side for two turns, thank you, Hatstand- and then a lone Maus (400/400), also in defence. Rest in pieces.
“You- you’ll still have to take the contact damage from Quillblades!” By this point, a small semicircle had formed around their table, so everyone got to watch as Susie smirked, then went through her turn; summoning Rude Ranger (1400/1100) to break the Maus, declaring her Thrash Machine’s attack on Kingphisher, and finishing off with the card she’d drawn. The healing item Darkburger.
“What contact damage?” Technically, she should have waited, as Darkburger healed more than Quillblades hurt, but it was absolutely worth it to see Berdly’s face… which really should not be flipping back to entirely smug that soon.
“This damage! I play the spell Acidic Battery, destroying a facedown on your side of the field and bringing your life points back down to where they should be.”
S-3600/B-4000
“That was a bluff card, and you should bring your volume back down.”
“I-I also play a second Maus in defence, and end my turn.”
“Wow. Yknow, I’ll take pity on you, Berdly. That Maus is dead, but I won’t even destroy your Taskat this turn.” Susie summoned in a Jigsaur (1700/1100) to finish, then leaned back. What were the chances he drew another Taskat then and there?
“With my second Taskat entering the field, I summon the Taskat Manager (2400/2400), who prevents all your animal-typed cards from attacking or defending- and that includes your Thrash Machine due to the secondary effect of your vaunted Mane Ax! I destroy your Hatstand with Manager, deal the extra three hundred damage from Firing Wall, and after switching them back to attack mode I send both Kats at your lifepoints! And, I would have gotten it back this turn anyways, but I’ll be taking back Chain Mail and equipping it to Taskat Manager now, thank you.”
S-1700/B-4000
Fuck shit ass tits goddamn hell, she had to open her big mouth.
“I draw, I unequip Mane Ax, yeah yeah, not enough attack to beat Manager now, whatever.“ This draw would have to work out. It was a risky play, but it was her best play without gambling further. And she made her own chance.
“You know, there is one thing I respect about you, Berdly. No matter your issues, you give it a hundred percent. You treat everything with the same amount of seriousness, which is apparently all of it. So, I’ll do the same. You wanna see me cause some real carnage with my ace rune? Here’s the Boss Darkner Devil’s Jester. Normally I’d have to tribute summon for two darkners, but the special ability Dark Bet lets it special summon to my board by randomly destroying one rune on the field, from either of us. How lucky are you feeling, Berdly?” She pulled out the black glass 20-sided dice from her coat pocket, and held it up to the light. “‘Cause I know fate’s on my side.”
Angel she was gonna look so fucking stupid if this didn’t work out for her. To his credit, Berdly put on a brave face, and began numbering the cards on the table. Firing Wall, Defensive Quillblades, two Taskats, Taskat Manager was immune to destruction thanks to Chain Mail but the armour itself wasn’t, and a facedown for him. Jigsaur, Rude Ranger, Thrash Machine, and Mane Ax for her.
“A six in ten shot for you, Susan. Do your worst.”
She rolled the dice across the table. It meandered almost to Berdly’s cards before stopping. They both squinted at the twelve, until with an annoyed huff, Susie scooped it up and rolled again. The next almost careened off the table, but stopped at the edge, displaying a cheeky seventeen. This time, Susie chuckled.
“Yknow what, how about you throw? Means you won’t be able to claim I rigged it either.” Berdly sniffed, but took the proffered dice and sent it rolling with a flick of his wrist, across and past his Manager, over her Thrash Machine, until it stopped exactly on top of her graveyard pile. With the way the light bent, it almost looked like Hatstand was smiling proudly around the number five. No monster, but still exactly what she needed.
“So, goodbye Chain Mail, and hello to-“
“Not so fast! I still have a proverbial ace of my own! With my facedown Cyber Cage, I can take Devil’s Jester off the board until the start of your next turn!”
“…Fine. I’ll manage. Got enough lifepoints. I play one facedown rune and end my turn.”
“Oh, Susan, Susan, Susan. You’d have enough lifepoints to survive my current assault of darkners, but you failed to consider, I have more! Ambu-Lance (700/1300) is a usually-weak darkner, but it can summon a monster from the graveyard at half their original attack! And though battered and bruised, once your Thrash Machine is destroyed, Kingphisher (900/1400) will provide enough power to win the day!” Berdly was blindingly smug, caught up in the rush.
“Alright, man, declare your attacks.”
“First, Taskat Manager destroys that Thrash Machine! Then-“
“Nuh uh.”
“…And what, precisely, do you mean by ‘Nuh Uh’.” Susie couldn’t help the megawatt grin as she flipped up her last trick.
“Sure, I’ll take the damage, but +Guts lets Thrash Machine stick around, so Firing Wall doesn’t activate. And since Manager can’t attack twice, and none of your other darkners can attack me directly…” Berdly was crumbling like a sandcastle as he calculated the consequences, his eyes widening in fear.
“…I reequip Defensive Quillblades to Kingphisher.”
S-1600/B-4000
“My turn. Welcome back, the clown of chaos! (2500/2500) After equipping Mane Ax to Rude Ranger I’m moving right to attacks. Devil’s Jester destroys Taskat Manager, which frees up the rest of my darkners, so Thrash Machine destroys Ambu-Lance, and Rude Ranger and Jigsaur hunt down your Kats. I end my turn. Should’ve switched to defence mode, man.” One more attack, and the game was hers.
S- 1600/B-100
“I-I draw! Ha! Yes! I play the spell Hurricane, which returns all cards on the field to the bottom of our decks! You’ve already played so many darkners, you’re bound to draw a spell or an item first!”
Susie didn’t actually facepalm, but it was a close thing.
“Pretty sure you’ve played more than me.”
“Sh-shut up! Just take your turn!”
“Uh huh. Fun fact for you, Berdly.” Susie tossed the darkner card she’d drawn onto the table. “I have a total five non-darkners in this deck and I’ve already used four. When Lancerjack’s the only card on my field, for just one turn, the special ability Ace in the Hole sets its attack to the same number as your lifepoints.” She grinned toothily, and finger-gunned him across the table. “Bang.”
S-1600/B-0
Somewhat anticlimactically, as Berdly sat back in his seat, motionless and aghast, the crowd simply chuckled and dispersed, with a couple ‘Nice goings’ and ‘glad you shut him up’ tossed her way. Susie went about packing up her cards, until the awkward silence grew to be too much, and she snapped her fingers in Berdly’s face, and he startled.
“Hey. Get your deck together.”
“How did I lose! Why! It should have been perfect!”
“Perfection isn’t worth crap, man. Can’t believe I’m the one fuckin telling you this, but you don’t have to be, like, top of the world to have fun. And that’s what a game is, right? It was a good duel, dude. Taskat Manager almost had me like Little Mike offstage.” The stunned expression on his face cleared somewhat.
“Susie…a Smashing Fighters reference?!”
“We’ve literally played together and I beat you.”
“Well, yes, but this is a deep cut! I had no idea how true of a gamer you were!” She raised an eyebrow.
“I just kicked your nerd ass at a nerd trading card game for nerds- shit!” Susie had accidentally swept her box off the table, and the cards went flying. “Crap, mind helping me pick them up?”
“How could I refuse a request for help from a fellow cultured individual! Of course!” Susie rolled her eyes as she crouched. Thankfully none of the cards had gone flying far, and the sudden spike of fear began to abate in her chest. Until she noticed Berdly holding a handful and it rammed right back through her ribs. Hell no.
“Susie, is this-"
“Give it back.” He looked at her, puzzled.
“These are brilliant cards, why-“
She stood up, and slammed a hand on the table. Heads almost definitely turned.
“GIVE IT BACK!”
“Okay! Here." Berdly shot up too, hands extended, and she snatched the cards back. Heart in her mouth, Susie slotted the cards back into her box, and the pounding in her head eased off again. All three, safe and sound.
“Susie… If my maths is not mistaken, and it never is, at the least that is one additional non-darkner card that you do not consider part of your deck, and from your reaction I would imagine none of them are. But those are brilliant, useful cards, why… why wouldn’t you use them?”
Susie turned away, cradling her deck box for a second, before roughly shoving it into her pocket.
“You don’t get to know. And I don’t get to play them, maybe not ever. I’m just… keeping them safe. See ya round, Nerdly.”
Once she was outside, Susie couldn’t resist checking again, for her own safety. Her main deck was in order, Devil’s Jester and Lancerjack and Mane Ax all pride of place as her ace cards, then the divider, then… the other cards. Ultraheal. Axe of Justice.
The Great Smith. All safe. All here.
It started to rain, so she quickly put them away again and started marching towards Kris’ house. But strangely, she could only feel the damp on her cheeks.