Chapter Text
Rocky, Adrian, and their humans had been enjoying a weekly (human week, that is) ‘movie night’. The tradition had begun a month or so after their new, earth-obsessed friend Simon was found in a natural satellite covered in ‘blood' —Rocky didn't know what it was, but Grace had assured him it was important for earthlings—, and it had been going strong ever since.
Every participant absolutely delighted in movie night, albeit for different reasons. Adrian liked being immersed in human rituals; much more interested in their cultures than their biology. Simon seemed to genuinely enjoy the mindless fun the films provided. Rocky just liked spending time with the ones he cared for the most (and Simon. He still wasn't completely sold on Simon.) Grace claimed he also appreciated the movies, but Rocky was pretty sure his favorite part of the tradition was having an excuse to cuddle up to Simon. Everything was great during movie nights.
Up until a exactly a week ago.
Ryland had suggested they watch 'The Lion King'. He said something about it being 'for kids' but promised it was still a ‘Disney classic’, and a ’real tear-jerker’. Rocky wasn’t completely enthused about watching Grace and, worse yet, Simon, leak, but he was willing to go along with it.
Grace and Rocky had agonized over a screen that both humans and Eridians could decipher. They had still not gotten it quite right: everything was a little blurry both for the Eridians and the humans, but it worked fine. The tech was quite a work of art, in their opinion.
As Adrian and Simon paid close attention to the pretty drawings on the screen, Rocky couldn't help but notice that Grace was positively staring at Simon. He was leaning on his hand and had a lovesick, happy smile on his face.
Rocky hummed a quiet laugh. He knew Grace was desperate to mate with Simon, and Adrian, who was closer to Simon, assured him that the feeling was mutual. If nothing else, Simon worshipped the ground Grace walked on. Still, it seemed neither were particularly eager to discuss their feelings. Their stupid humans were going to take forever to figure everything out.
"Gosh, Simon, you look beautiful in this lighting," Grace muttered to himself, but more than loud enough for everyone to hear.
FINALLY! Rocky would never say something so sweet to anyone but Adrian. Surely, this was some type of confession.
He looked over at his mate only to find them equally as enthused. They shared a knowing look and anticipated a romantic human display.
What they got instead was Simon and Grace staring at each other, both equally surprised by Grace's statement.
Just as a smile threatened to fall on Simon’s lips, Grace declared he was exhausted. He said he needed to 'hit the hay', which apparently meant 'go to sleep'.
Rocky was about to ask something about pausing the movie, but Adrian gestured for him to stay quiet.
Grace offered a meek little goodnight to the Eridians before disappearing into his living room, leaving Simon hot in the face and, after a few seconds of allowing the silence to sit, devastated.
Rocky's following visits were a little somber. The humans weren't together like they usually were. More importantly, both seemed much less happy than before. After some discussions with Adrian, they concluded that Simon and Grace must not have been talking to one another after what happened that night.
"Grace try court Simon. Grace fail. Grace scared," Adrian proposed.
"Simon hear compliment. Simon scared," Rocky countered.
Whatever the case, it took around a human week for them to decide they were not above meddling. Adrian and Rocky could no longer bear to watch their humans clumsily dance around each other.
They decided to try dividing and conquering. Simon was inside his and Grace’s home, and Ryland was reading on the beach. Perfect.
————
Adrian was very polite. They made sure not to leave footprints as they approached the house. They made their presence known by knocking (despite the fact that the door had no lock and they could’ve easily just gone in). He said hello and how are you before getting to the point.
Not that Simon was entertaining the small talk. The poor human seemed miserable.
Eventually, when their pleasantries ran dry, they eased into the topic.
“Adrian notice Grace and Simon no talk.”
The look on Simon’s face resembled the one he’d worn after Ryland had called him beautiful. Some combination of stunned and terrified. “Uhhh.”
“Simon sad sad sad.” Adrian waited for a rebuttal and, upon receiving none, went on. “Simon no want talk with Grace, question?”
Simon grimaced. “More like Grace refuses to talk to Simon.”
Ah. Well, that answered the first question. “Grace sad sad sad. Why Grace no talk, question?”
“If I knew why then I’d fucking fix it, wouldn’t I?” He snapped. His shoulders quickly slumped when he realized he was being defensive, just like Grace had asked him not to be. “Sorry. Not your fault.”
“Simon no need sorry. Adrian understand.”
“It’s just… Ever since the dinner… And I had thought, because he said…” Simon tugged at his hair. “But now he’s pretending I don’t exist! I don’t understand what I did wrong.”
“Simon no do wrong. Grace just dumb,” they explained sympathetically.
“Grace isn’t dumb.” Simon seemed irritated by the very implication.
“…Grace silly,” they amended. “Grace too honest. Grace afraid. Grace run away.”
Simon straightened up. “What do you mean?”
“Grace try to court Simon. Grace bad at courting.”
The slightest flicker of hope dawned on Simon’s features. “Do you think he’s trying to court me?”
Adrian remained quiet for a beat. No shit. “Simon also dumb.”
The flicker died. Of course Ryland wasn’t trying to ‘court’ him. Why would he? Even the alien rock thing thought it was ridiculous. “Yeah. Yeah. Right. Of course he isn’t.”
“No, exclamation!” Adrian chittered loudly. “Simon stupid stupid stupid. Grace try court Simon, statement. Grace obvious, exclamation! Grace try court Simon, and Simon scared, so Grace scared, so Grace run away, so Simon sad sad sad. Yes, question?”
It took Simon a second to piece the broken translation together. “You think Grace was trying to court me that night.”
“Yes.”
“But then why has he been avoiding me?”
“Adrian say already. Grace scared.”
“Why the fuck would he be scared? Scared of what? Of me?” Simon couldn’t decide if he was devastated at the implication or mad at the alien for having implied it. Could Grace still be afraid of him? Of his hideous mutations? Of his new-found strength?
“Simon stupid, exclamation! Grace not afraid of Simon, Grace afraid he ask Simon to be mate and Simon say no.”
“That’s stupid. I love Ryland. He knows I love him. I’ve made it pretty fucking clear. Why would I say no?”
Wait. “Simon know Simon love Grace, question?”
A dreamy smile fell on Simon’s face. “How could I not? He’s… He’s the prettiest man I’ve ever seen. He saved my life. He knows what I have done, yet he doesn’t hate me. His forgiveness is endless. And he’s so smart, he—”
“Silent.” Adrian wasn’t usually rude, but this was a worthy exception. “Simon know Simon love Grace, statement.”
“…Yes?”
Adrian honest-to-god shrieked. “AND SIMON NO TELL GRACE?!”
“Fuck, dude! Don’t yell!”
“Simon know Simon love Grace and no tell Grace, exclamation!”
Simon shushed him, suddenly remembering Grace couldn’t be that far away. “Why are you freaking out?!”
“Adrian assume Simon in denial, exclamation! If Simon know, why no tell, question?”
Was Adrian going insane? Simon had thought that Rocky’s mate was pretty smart. Why were they so confused about this? “Look, I'm not sure how you do things here, but where I’m from, being rejected fucking sucks.”
Adrian could not fathom any intelligent creature being this dumb. How had humans even discovered space travel?
They were about to reassure him that Grace wouldn’t reject him before realizing that they didn’t technically know that. They knew Grace wanted Simon to be his mate, but if Rocky didn’t have success with his pep talk, Grace might not be ready to accept the invitation. They decided not to say something they couldn’t guarantee. Instead, they asked: “Has Simon wonder if Grace not know, question?”
Simon paused. “Not really. I’m not very subtle about it.”
“Simon should ask Grace to be mate, statement.”
“No.”
Adrian hadn’t heard Simon be that assertive in a while. “Why, question?”
“No. No, I’ve asked for enough. For too much. Ryland— Ryland is like an angel. I am… not that. I am disgusting, and inhuman, and violent. I don’t deserve him. I don’t deserve any part of him, let alone all of him. He has already given me a life, and a second chance, and a home, and a place in heaven. He has given me everything. How could I ever ask him for more? How could I dare ask such a kind, intelligent, beautiful man to be mine after everything I’ve done?”
Adrian stared. “Could ask with word.”
Simon’s face fell into a frown. “Don’t sass me, rock.”
“Adrian name not rock. Rocky name rock.”
“I hate you.”
“Lie. Simon like Adrian, statement.” They tilted their head. “Simon love Grace, statement. Grace love—“
“Stop,” Simon interrupted, a funny feeling blossoming in the back of his throat. He had everything. He’d be stupid to ruin it by breaking his own heart. “Stop, I can’t… Can’t do it. Can’t even hope. Please.” Simon had long-since decided he was not above begging. “Please don’t tell anyone.”
Adrian considered his words. “Adrian tell Rocky, question?”
He hesitated. “No. Rocky would tell Ryland.”
Adrian clicked in what Simon supposed was the Eridian equivalent of a sigh. “Adrian no tell Rocky, statement.”
————
Rocky was not so polite. “Grace kill Rocky.”
Ryland already knew what his friend was talking about. They’d had similar conversations on his ‘cowardice’ before. “I’m not killing you.”
“Grace lie. Grace kill Rocky. Grace kill Rocky with dumb.”
He put down the book he’d been pretending to read. “Rocky, please drop it. I was being a creep the other day, and—”
“What is word, question?”
All the wind vanished from his sails. “Creep? Like, uh, weird. In a bad way.” Ryland sighed. “I said something that’s not mine to say, like a creep, and I made Simon uncomfortable. Because Simon doesn’t want me the way that I want him.”
Rocky walked closer to Ryland. “Grace lie.”
“I’m not lying!”
“Then Grace dumb. Dumb dumb dumb.” Rocky stomped his legs after each word for emphasis.
“How would you know that, Rock?” Grace tried to argue. “I get that you think… but you don’t know that he’s into me. You don’t even know how humans express romantic interest.”
“Grace also not know.”
Touché. “Okay, fine, but I know more about it than you do, and I promise he’s not interested.”
Rocky had been suggesting Ryland confess his feelings for a while now. Ryland always responded with this assumption that Simon ‘wasn’t interested’. “Grace not have proof, exclamation!”
Ryland was growing increasingly frustrated. “Neither do you!”
“Rocky have more proof than Grace, exclamation! Simon follow Grace around. Simon wax poetic about Grace intelligence.”
“Wax poetic? Where did you learn what that means?”
“Simon look at Grace always. Simon laugh at Grace not funny joke.”
“My jokes are funny!”
“Grace love Simon. Simon love Grace. Grace and Simon mate. Easy easy easy.”
Ryland let his shoulders droop. “Rock, Simon… Simon appreciates me. Simon cares about me. He’s grateful for all we’ve given him. And, heck, maybe he does love me, just… not in a ‘mate’ type of way,” he explained. “And, on earth, or— well— in human culture, chasing people who don’t want you is bad. I’ve been chasing him around, and it’s been making him uncomfortable.”
“Simon no uncomfortable. If Simon uncomfortable, Simon tell Grace, statement.”
“I don’t think he would. Like, he hasn’t said anything about the dinner. And, look, Simon feels like he owes us for saving his life. Not to mention that he doesn’t really trust us yet. I mean, we know that we’d never hurt him, but he doesn’t. He has every reason to be afraid of us. Of me.”
He stood up just to pace around. “And if he’s afraid of me, then he’ll be afraid of upsetting me. And if he’s afraid of upsetting me, then he won’t reject me, even if he wants to! If I ask him to be… what, my boyfriend? My partner? My ‘mate’?” He planted his feet on the ground, finding his literal and metaphorical footing. “If I ask him to be mine, he'll be afraid to say no, so he won't, and our relationship will make him miserable. If I keep, like, chasing him, staring, flirting, then I’ll keep making him uncomfortable. And that dinner proved that I can’t be trusted to be around him without being weird!”
Expressing his incredible reasoning had left him winded. “It’s better to just keep my distance. That way, I won't hurt him.”
Rocky stood perfectly still for an agonizing couple of seconds. Then, he chittered: “Grace overthinking.”
“No! Grace thinking a perfectly normal amount, and he is not taking critiques on his solution!” He crossed his arms and pouted, knowing his demands had no bite behind them.
Rocky buried his head (face? torso?) in his front appendages and made a clicking sound. “Grace kill Rocky.”