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the sound of distant seagulls blends effortlessly with the gentle melody of the waves rolling onto the shore. the breeze carries the scent of salt through the air, brushing softly against youngwoo's face as the last warmth of the afternoon sun lingers on his skin. in front of them, the pacific stretches endlessly until it meets the horizon. the sky is slowly changing colors; gold melts into amber, amber into soft pink. pink into deep violet. the entire coastline looks as though someone had painted it by hand.
there is something undeniably peaceful about the ocean, perhaps that's why youngwoo has always loved it.
"it's beautiful..." youngwoo whispers, letting the sea breeze wash over him as though he wanted to memorize the feeling forever.
taejoon doesn't answer. his tattooed hands, now marked by age as much as the ink beneath his skin, remain firmly wrapped around the handles of the wheelchair as he quietly pushes his husband along the weathered wooden boards of malibu pier, and neither of them feels the need to fill the silence because, after fifty years together, silence had become another language, one they both understood perfectly.
months earlier, when the doctors gently admitted there was nothing more they could do, youngwoo hadn't cried or hadn't asked how much time he had left. he hadn't even looked surprised. instead, he simply reached for his husband's hand and held it a little tighter while the room had fallen silent. youngwoo could hear the doctor's voice still explaining treatments, palliative care and the months he might have left, but the words slowly faded into the background.
all he could think about was the hand holding his. the same hand that had held him for more than fourty years, and then, after a long silence, he turned to taejoon.
youngwoo simply smiled, softly and tenderly. almost as if he were trying to comfort his husband instead.
"let's go see the ocean together one last time..."
so... they did. taejoon didn't hesitate and whatever could wait, would wait.the house, the bar, the endless list of things that had once seemed important. none of it mattered anymore but youngwoo. and for the first time in decades spent at working hard enough to built the life they always wanted, they left everything behind without thinking twice.
and together, they went back to the ocean.
under a purple and amber summer sky, malibu pier is alive. happy children weave between tourists, their laughter echoing above the sound of the waves. somewhere nearby, a street musician strums an old 80s love song on his guitar and the melody drifts through the salty breeze. couples stop to admire the sunset, friends lean against the railing and strangers pause to take pictures and selfies as the last golden light kisses the ocean.
life continues exactly as it always has. then, youngwoo notices them.
two young men walk past, their fingers comfortably intertwined. they can't be older than twenty. the taller one leans down to steal a quick kiss, earning nothing but a laugh and a playful shove in return.
no one stares, no one judges. no one tells them to stop. they simply keep walking, hand in hand, as though loving each other in broad daylight were the most ordinary thing in the world.
youngwoo can't help but smile, his heart softens. there had once been a time when something as simple as holding taejoon's hand had been impossible and a stolen glance could end in bruises, a whispered confession could ruin two lives. how many times had he imagined a moment like this when they were young? just him and the love of his life, walking side by side beneath the sun. there was no gang and no fear. no violence around them, nor jason's voice whispering for them to stay apart.
just the two of them, despite every mistake and every silence. despite every wound they had given each other.
now... how much time do they have left?
after years of misunderstanding, pain, and suffering, they had finally made it.
they had grown old together, waking up side by side every morning, making love almost every day, and sharing the smallest, most ordinary moments of life.
how strange life is... all those years, they had been afraid they would never have this. and now that they finally did, they had to face the possibility of losing it forever.
youngwoo slowly leans back against the wheelchair, his body is tired. the same body that had once made people turn around to look at him has become impossibly frail, the blanket covering his legs barely hides how much weight he has lost. chemotherapy had taken his hair months ago, now he rarely leaves the house without a hat, and sometimes he catches himself smiling at the irony of it, remembering that time when he once teased taejoon relentlessly for getting a buzzcut back then.
youngwoo truly hates how frail he has become; his hands tremble every now and then, his breathing comes a little slower and a little heavier. but yet, as he looks out at the endless ocean shimmering beneath the fading sunlight... none of it seems to matter. not the illness, nor the pain. not even the months the doctors had quietly placed between him and forever. because beside him stands that fifteen years old boy he had spent a lifetime loving and, somehow... that is more than enough.
now... that boy has silver hair and wrinkles around his eyes. his hands that have spent an entire lifetime holding his. youngwoo reaches back without looking, almost instinctively. his bony fingers search for taejoon's and they find them immediately, just as they always do.
"we have grown old..." taejoon chuckles.
"oh, really? thanks for telling me! i think i started suspecting it when your knees began making those weird noises every time you sat down." youngwoo replies sarcastically, unable to hide the smirk on his face. despite everything, he hadn't lost his sense of humor or his way of softly mocking his husband. and maybe that was what taejoon loved the most about him: even after all the pain, all the fear, and all the things they had been forced to endure through the years, shin youngwoo was still shin youngwoo. still teasing him as if they were still kids, still smiling with that same sarcastic spark, still finding little ways to make their ordinary days feel like home.
"my knees?" asks taejoon, with a smile.
"yeah." youngwoo turns his head just enough to glance at his husband. "didn't you ever realize how loud they are whenever you sit down?"
taejoon bursts out laughing. a real, genuine laugh. one that disappears almost as quickly as it comes. because every laugh reminds him, every smile reminds him. every ordinary moment suddenly feels unbearably precious. they keep moving forward, their smiles never fading, and the pier slowly comes to an end, but neither of them rushes to get there. for once, they allow themselves to pretend that time is not something they have to count, while the sun is almost gone now and only a thin line of gold remains above the water.
"do you remember?" taejoon asks quietly. "this is the place where i proposed to you."
youngwoo lets out a small snort. "oh taejoon..." a playful smile curves across his lips. "i have cancer..." a beat passes. "not alzheimer's!"
"shin youngwoo! you never change, do you?"
taejoon stares at his husband for a moment, caught between wanting to laugh and wanting to cry. because even now, even after everything, youngwoo still finds a way to make him smile. then, he quietly kneels in front the wheelchair, facing his husband, and his joints immediately protest.
youngwoo raises an eyebrow. "see? i told you!"
instead of standing back up, taejoon stays where he is, kneeling in front of youngwoo. his knees protest almost immediately, a quiet reminder that they are no longer the young men who once stood on this pier with their whole lives ahead of them, but he barely notices. because for a moment, it feels like time has folded in on itself, like he is not an old man kneeling in front of the person he has loved for fifty years, and like he is still the young man who once stood here, heart pounding, asking youngwoo to choose him all over.
taejoon's hand slowly slips into the front pocket of his pants and youngwoo watches him, curious at first, then he sees the small velvet box. and suddenly, he forgets how to breathe.
taejoon's hands are shaking, more than his own ever did. even more the very first time he proposed to the love of his life thirty years ago, in the same place, with the sun watching over them. for a moment, youngwoo thinks he knows what it is: his husband had mentioned getting something fixed, after all. their wedding bands had started to show their age just like them! after all these years, even the things they treasured the most carried the marks of time.
but he never expected this.
then, finally taejoon opens the little box. inside rests their wedding band. not a new one, but the same one he had placed on youngwoo's finger all those years ago. the same ring youngwoo had eventually lost multiple times because of his own clumsiness, until taejoon found it again and kept it safe on the chain around his husband's neck. the same ring that witnessed their happiest days, but even the hardest ones. every morning they woke up beside each other, every argument they overcame. every ordinary moment that became precious simply because they shared it. every time they made love.
the silver had been polished, but proof of a lifetime they had built together.
and on the inside, hidden away from everyone else, there was a new engraving.
forevermore.
youngwoo's purple eyes sting.
"i know we're already married..." taejoon whispers, his voice trembling. "i know i've already promised you forever..." his fingers gently brush against the ring. "but after fifty years with you..." he swallows hard, his breathing becoming more difficult as tears inevitably threaten to fall. "i still don't think once was enough."
youngwoo doesn't speak, he simply looks at him, tthe man who had spent half a century loving him with everything he had.
the same man who had held his hand through every fear, every joy, every moment that made up their life together.
the same man who was still choosing him.
again, again and again.
"marry me again, shin youngwoo."
the words barely leave taejoon's lips before tears begin rolling down his face.
"and again."
a shaky breath.
"and again."
he looks at youngwoo as if he is trying to memorize him, afraid that the cancer could steal him away before he gets the chance to ask for one more lifetime together.
"as many times as this life allows me."
youngwoo feels his own eyes burn. slowly, he reaches up and cups taejoon's cheek, his thumb brushes over the faded scar. the same scar he had kissed thousands of times over the years.
"you know what?" he whispers. a gentle smile curves across his lips. "i'd still choose you, dummy". his fingers linger against taejoon's skin, gently wiping away the tears rolling down his husband's cheeks.
"in every lifetime."
taejoon closes his eyes and youngwoo leans forward as much as his tired body allows, pressing one last lingering kiss against his lips. soft, unhurried. full of fifty years of memories, the good ones and the bad ones. and when they finally pull apart, their foreheads remain touching.
the last rays of sunlight disappear beneath the horizon.
"i love you... i love you." taejoon whispers, desperately hugging his husband, as if trying to keep him from slipping away.
youngwoo smiles. taejoon has never been someone who voices his feelings so openly; he has always preferred to show his love through actions rather than words. and yet, here he is, saying everything he has spent a lifetime trying to express. his heart can't stop racing.
"you are always so cheesy, aren't you?"
there is a small pause, then youngwoo leans forward as much as his tired body allows and wraps his arms around his husband. a small tear slips down his cheek.
"i love you too. forevermore"