Chapter Text
He knows what he has to do. It doesn't make it easier, knowing, though.
Donnie wiped his tears on the sleeve of his hoodie and walked all the way home, leaving Gretchen behind. He couldn't stop thinking of her though, even as he crawled into his bed. He couldn't stop thinking about a lot of things, actually, but mostly her. How they met after he was the one who flooded the school, how they didn't kiss that one time in the park because of that guy, about when she told him about her mother being missing and being afraid of her stepfather, he thought about her death.
He wants to hate his life and that book and his schizophrenia and all that's happened to him lately, but he can't help but think that the past 28 days of his life have probably been the best days he's ever had. Gretchen had happened, him revealing Jim Cunningham had happened, and now he was saving the world from destruction, not that it's his choice. The book told him everything he needed to know.
Donnie laughs at the irony of it all. He doesn't want to die, he knows inside, but he doesn't really have a choice does he?
He lays back down on his bed, sitting his eyes and thinks about his life. His is sister's, his mom, dad. A smile spreads across his face and he's almost pulled into sleep.
Then it happens.
Loud sounds and chaos surrounds him and all he can feel is sharp pain. He fights every urge to panic when he finds the large wooden shard sticking through his abdomen. He's looking around the remains of his room as he struggles to breathe what he thinks will be his last breaths. He gasps when the rubble shifts and his wound is jostled.
It hurts so much, make it stop.
Please let it be fast.
He feels hot liquid rise in his throat and spill over his lips as the world around him spins more. The fire in his chest won't stop.
Please, please let it be fast.
His eyes grow heavier with each growing second and the corners of his vision is darkening quickly.
Donnie can faintly hear people shuffling outside the wreckage, most likely his parents. He hears sirens growing closer and then sounds of vehicles parking somewhere near.
They're too late, I have to die.
He pictures Gretchen's face one last time and takes a shallow, shaking breath, praying the pain will be over soon. Donnie Darko finally closes his eyes and lets the darkness pull him under.
–
Gretchen stops her bike in front of one of the houses on her way to school. What's interesting is there's multiple fire and police trucks parked outside, more noticeably a truck carrying a jet engine drives past her. She realizes the extent of the damage to the house when she gets closer.
“Hey, what's going on?” She asks a boy standing across the street next to her, who she assumes is a neighbor.
“A jet engine fell on their house,” the kid replies. She thinks that is the weirdest thing she's ever heard.
“Wow, that's horrible. Was anyone hurt?”
“The boy whose room is crushed was rushed to the hospital just after it happened. I'm not sure if he made it.” That makes Gretchen feel a pang of sympathy for the boy she never even knew.
“What was his name?” She finally asks.
“Donnie, Donnie Darko.”
For some reason it feels familiar, like she's heard it before, but she knows in her mind that she hasn't. Gretchen thinks about the dream she had last night and can faintly recall the face of a boy. She knows her dreams can't be real or anything like that but it doesn't stop the sense of extreme deja vu.
Gretchen looks back at the damaged house one more time before riding away to school.
—
Reality came back to Donnie slowly. He registered that he was laying down and there was a sharp pain in his chest and he didn't know wh–
Wait, I'm supposed to be dead.
His eyes flew open and he squinted through a bright light above him as he frantically tried to see where he was. He stopped immediately and gasped in pain, regretting trying to move. Donnie looks around and sees that he's in a hospital bed.
He remembers everything now.
No no no no no why am I still alive?
Part of him was relieved and the rest of him dreaded the consequences. The world would end if he didn't die.
Why hasn't the world already ended? He thinks. He had seen the storm earlier that threatened to engulf reality. Everything should've been gone by now.
Donnie freezes when he sees the tall bunny in the corner of the room. The twisted mask's eyes were staring right at him. Why was Frank still around and why is Donnie seeing him when he is lucid? Frank should be dead, he killed him.
“What do you want?” Donnie croaks, his voice so hoarse he doesn't know if the hallucinated rabbit can hear him.
“Nothing, it just looks like you've cheated time.”
“What does that mean?”
“You didn't have to die after all. This was your fate from the start.”
Donnie vaguely figured it out. He never had to die, he just had to be in his room when the engine fell. He had to end up here in the hospital now.
He sighs when he realizes it's all over. He's still here but he'd never have to see Frank again. He wouldn't have to burn down houses or flood schools, he wouldn't have to see Gretchen get killed again.
Gretchen.
She must be alive if everything reset. He thinks he needs to find her now. Donnie needs to know if she's alright.
He clutches the railing of the bed and sits himself up having to suppress a scream as he thinks something tears inside him.
God, it hurts so much.
Donnie's vision darkens a bit as he tries to stand and he can feel the bandages wrapped around him feel a little damp. His breathing is hard and his entire body is on fire. It feels like he's being repeatedly stabbed in the chest and thinks about how he stabbed Frank in the eye.
Is this how it felt?
He knows the wetness he can feel under his medical gown isn't a good sign but he keeps going anyway. Donnie tries to take a step and falters, falling to the floor.
His vision tunnels as he feels his consciousness slip.
Gretchen, please.