Chapter Text
Peter Parker had survived a lot of things.
He had survived getting bitten by a radioactive spider.
He had survived fighting a guy wearing a metal bird suit.
He had survived alien invasions, time travel, almost dying approximately seventeen thousand times, and the emotional trauma of watching Tony Stark discover that Peter had once attempted to fix a toaster with web fluid.
He had survived all of that.
But nothing — absolutely nothing — could have prepared him for the words that came out of Mr Harrington's mouth on a perfectly normal Tuesday morning.
"We will be taking a field trip next week."
The class immediately erupted.
Peter barely looked up from his notebook.
Field trips were usually fine.
Field trips meant getting out of class, which meant fewer equations and fewer chances for teachers to notice when he accidentally melted something in chemistry.
Then Mr Harrington continued.
"Our destination will be Stark Industries."
Peter froze.
Completely.
Utterly.
His pen stopped halfway through a sentence.
Beside him, Ned noticed immediately.
Because Ned knew Peter Parker.
Ned knew that Peter's usual reactions to things ranged from excited bouncing to nervous rambling.
He did not usually go completely still like someone had hit the pause button.
"Peter?" Ned whispered.
Peter slowly turned his head.
"No."
Ned blinked.
"I didn't even ask anything."
"I know."
MJ, sitting on Peter's other side, glanced over.
"You look like you just saw a ghost."
Peter stared forward.
"That's because I might actually die."
MJ raised an eyebrow.
"It's a tour of a building."
Peter lowered his voice.
"You don't understand."
Ned leaned closer.
"Oh."
The realisation dawned on his face.
"Oh no."
"Exactly," Peter whispered.
MJ sighed.
"You live with superheroes and somehow a school tour is what scares you?"
"Yes."
"That makes absolutely no sense."
"It makes perfect sense."
Peter started counting on his fingers.
"Okay. One: Tony is there."
Ned nodded.
"Fair."
"Two: Harley is there."
MJ nodded.
"Also fair."
"Three: the entire Avengers Tower is basically a daycare for emotionally damaged adults."
"Accurate," MJ admitted.
"Four: half of them have no concept of acting normal."
Ned looked thoughtful.
"Also accurate."
"Five: Flash is going to be there."
That made both Ned and MJ pause.
Because unfortunately, that was the real problem.
Flash Thompson had made it his personal mission in life to prove Peter Parker was lying.
About everything.
Mostly about Stark Industries.
It had started months ago when Peter had casually mentioned he had an internship.
Not the full truth, obviously.
Because the full truth was:
Peter Parker did not have an internship at Stark Industries.
Peter Parker had a bedroom at Stark Tower.
Peter Parker had his own workshop.
Peter Parker had a security clearance higher than most employees.
Peter Parker had accidentally helped design technology that was currently being used by several branches of Stark Industries.
Peter Parker also had a boyfriend who lived there.
Which was somehow the least complicated part of the situation.
But Peter couldn't exactly say:
"Actually, Flash, I don't intern at Stark Industries. I just live there with Earth's mightiest heroes."
So he had said:
"I have an internship."
A normal person would have accepted that.
Flash Thompson was not normal.
Flash had decided Peter was lying.
And now Peter had to go on a field trip to the exact place where his lie existed.
"This is bad," Peter muttered.
MJ looked amused.
"You know, most people would be excited to visit Stark Industries."
"Most people don't have Tony Stark as their father figure."
Ned smiled.
"You just admitted he's like your dad."
Peter immediately panicked.
"I did not."
"You absolutely did."
"I did not."
"You literally said 'father figure'."
Peter covered his face.
"I hate both of you."
"No, you don't," MJ said.
"No, I don't."
The second Peter got home that afternoon, he knew he was doomed.
Because the Tower was loud.
Not normal loud.
Not "people having conversations" loud.
Avengers Tower loud.
Which meant something had happened.
Something stupid.
Something expensive.
Something that would probably somehow become Peter's problem.
Peter stepped out of the elevator.
"Why is there a goat in the lobby?"
Everyone turned.
There was, indeed, a goat.
A very confident-looking goat.
Peter stared.
Tony looked up from his tablet.
"Before you ask, no, it's not mine."
"Why is there a goat?"
"Thor said it was lonely."
Peter looked at Thor.
Thor looked offended.
"All creatures deserve companionship, Spider-Man."
"Thor, that's a goat."
"Yes."
"Why is it here?"
"Because it required companionship."
Peter opened his mouth.
Closed it.
Opened it again.
"No."
Thor nodded.
"A wise response."
Peter sighed.
This was his life.
"Kid."
Peter turned.
Tony Stark was walking toward him.
That was never a good sign.
Especially when Tony had that particular look.
The look that meant Peter was either about to receive a lecture or be involved in something extremely illegal.
"What's up?"
Tony pointed at him.
"The field trip."
Peter froze.
"How do you know about that?"
Tony looked offended.
"Peter. I have FRIDAY."
The AI's voice came through the speakers.
"I also have access to your school calendar, Peter."
Peter looked upward.
"FRIDAY, please stop helping him."
"I apologise, Peter. However, Mr Stark is correct."
Tony smiled smugly.
"Thank you, FRIDAY."
"You are welcome, Mr Stark."
Peter pointed between them.
"This is exactly what I mean."
Tony ignored him.
"You don't have to go."
"What?"
"You don't."
Peter frowned.
"Tony."
"What?"
"I have to go."
"Why?"
"Because it's a school trip."
"You're literally going to a place you already live."
Peter lowered his voice.
"That's the problem."
Tony looked confused.
Then his expression softened slightly.
"Kid."
Peter knew that tone.
"Tony."
"You worried?"
Peter looked away.
"No."
Tony waited.
Peter sighed.
"Maybe."
For all of Tony's chaos, he was very good at noticing when Peter was actually upset.
"Because of Flash?"
Peter didn't answer.
Tony already knew.
"Peter."
"It's stupid."
"No."
"He thinks I'm lying."
Tony crossed his arms.
"About the internship?"
"Yeah."
Tony stared.
Then he laughed.
Peter looked offended.
"It's not funny."
"No, no, I'm sorry."
Tony absolutely was not sorry.
"He thinks you're lying about working here?"
"Yes."
Tony looked around the Tower.
Then back at Peter.
"The kid who built a functioning web formula in a bedroom vs a kid whose parents had to bribe the board to let him into the school"
Peter frowned.
"That's different."
"It really isn't."
Peter sighed.
"Tony, please don't do anything."
Tony immediately looked suspiciously innocent.
"I wasn't going to."
"You were."
"I wasn't."
"Tony."
"...I wasn't going to do anything dramatic."
Peter narrowed his eyes.
"That's not reassuring."
Peter should have known then.
He should have known that Tony Stark saying "I won't do anything dramatic" was basically a promise that something dramatic was already happening.
Because when Peter woke up the next morning, every single Iron Man suit in the workshop was wearing a tiny Spider-Man mask.
Peter stared.
Tony stared.
Everyone stared.
A long silence passed.
Finally:
"Harley."
Harley Keener looked up from his coffee.
"What?"
"You did this."
"No proof."
Peter looked at the suits.
Then at Harley.
Then at Tony.
"Really?"
Harley shrugged.
"They looked lonely."
Peter groaned.
Tony smiled.
"Honestly, kid, I think they pull it off."
Peter put his face in his hands.
The field trip hadn't even started.
And already, he knew one thing.
He was absolutely doomed.