Archive of Our Own

The first day Peter came over to their apartment as himself, and not in the Spider-Man suit, MJ hadn't been expecting it. She had been back at her desk by the window, researching potential companies that would not require sacrificing her morals to work at, when she heard Ned open their front door, seemingly in rapid, excited conversation with someone. And when she turned to say a quick greeting, all words got stuck in her throat as her eyes met Peter's. But then, she looked over at Ned looking back at her, with misty eyes and a wide smile, and she knew then that something had settled.

Turns out, Peter had walked up to Ned in the bodega he frequented, and had decided to take MJ up on what she said and introduce himself. And, as if his hands possessed their own mind, Ned performed their forgotten special handshake, and things had just clicked. All of a sudden, he connected the dots between Maynard the friendly neighbor, Spider-Man's name being Peter, the Peter in front of him, and a missing childhood best friend that he had only mentioned in passing in the shape of a LEGO Emperor Palpatine figure that felt paired with the Chewbacca figure he owned. And also, Peter did explain everything once the confusion settled.

"Isn't that crazy?" Ned said, looking at MJ with excitement. "I think being stuck in that mind freeze bubble maybe shook up some of the blocks that memory loss spell you talked about put in my head, because we shook hands at that party in our apartment, and I did not have that muscle memory back then. But all of a sudden, this time, BAM, there it is!"

All the time Ned excitedly rambled on, MJ looked over his shoulder at Peter, who was gazing at him with such fondness. There was a soft smile on his face, crinkles around his eyes, and an air of newfound comfort. He must've felt her eyes on him as he turned to return her gaze, and that smile quieted into something sadder, the guilt she saw from Frank's shipyard returning to his eyes. Her heart gave a pang at that, she didn't want him to feel guilty, or bad. She had meant it when she said she understood, and she knew he had understood her as well. Even if that air of comfort was also tinged with fragility. But then, her brain caught up to what Ned had just said, and she whipped her head back to him.

"Wait, so, you remember stuff now?" she asked, stepping away from her desk and closer to the two.

Ned paused, his shoulders dropping in disappointment. "Not really, no," he said glumly, and MJ felt a stab of disappointment. "It's not like anything solid. It's more just like, a feeling? Where there wasn't one before. At least, not as much." She nodded, picking at a loose thread on their couch. But then, Ned perked back up, throwing an arm around Peter's shoulders. "But Peter's gonna tell me everything he remembers, aren't you?" he said, squeezing his shoulders. "Starting right now, once I get our pizzas!"

"You ordered pizzas?" "Wait, right now?" MJ and Peter said at the same time, sentences stumbling over the other, as Ned made his way to the door, tapping at his smart watch.

"One, MJ of course I ordered pizzas. I just learned I have another best friend who I forgot, who also happens to be Spider-Man which means he had to skip out on the bánh mì from last time," Ned said as he glanced back at her, like it was the most obvious thing in the world. Then he turned to Peter, pointing at him. "And two, absolutely right now! You're crazy if you think that you are getting rid of me that easy now that you've told me, and I need to hear everything. So I'm gonna go get the pizzas, and you're gonna make yourself at home." And with that, Ned pumped his fists and practically skipped out of the apartment.

The moment Ned left, the room grew more awkward and that sense of fragility made itself more known. MJ folded her arms over her chest, looking over at Peter. His eyes weren't meeting hers, trained on his hands that he was rubbing anxiously. His backpack was hanging off his left shoulder, and she noticed the way his body leaned a bit more to the left. Because the other side is probably where the bullet hit him, she numbly realized, and it felt like someone had dumped a bucket of ice on her. Because only couple weeks ago, Spider-Man, Peter, had been in a hospital bed, barely clinging to life, as the city came to a standstill outside his window. And MJ had managed to grab Frank's attention enough to slip him her notebook with the sketch she had made earlier that day. And now here he was, alive, seemingly well, and Ned remembered. At least a little bit.

"Are you-" "MJ, I-"

They both stopped as soon as they heard the other speak, and both let out a laugh, the awkwardness became a little more bearable.

"I told you he could handle it," MJ settled for, realizing that 'are you okay' was probably a question that had a fairly obvious answer, not that he would say if anything was super wrong either. Because, she didn't know him. And he didn't really know her, not the version of her that was in this apartment now. So, she used Ned as an lifeline. "He's probably even more excited now about everything. If you thought the questions were bad last time, they're just going to get worse. It isn't even going to be Spider-Man specific anymore."

Peter snorted, nodding to himself. "Yeah, I figured. Maybe I should start with a quick breakdown of all the questions he has already asked me," he said. "Like, yes, the spider bite hurt but it's dead so we can't test it again; no, I can't spit venom or summon an army of spiders though, based on recent developments I haven't actually tested that again; and, no, I definitely don't lay eggs-"

"Did he really ask you that?" MJ asked, with a bemused squint, and Peter just nodded, laughing along with her. But then she felt a pit in her stomach at the situation, not dissimilar to when she first saw the disparity between their memories and emotions. "You really have all of these memories of us that we just, don't have anymore," she said quietly, fingers once again picking the threads of the couch. Peter's smile dimmed into that sad one again, looking more resigned and accepting than he had when she first told him that she didn't have any memories of them.

"MJ, I, I'm sorry," Peter said quietly. She started shaking her head, but he raised his hand up. "No, no just let me, please. You were right, I shouldn't have made that decision for you guys. I thought it was my responsibility to just carry it alone, and that, me not telling you guys would keep you safe." He sighed, looking back down at his hands. "But, I think a part of me was also just scared. Even if I did tell you guys, you wouldn't believe me. Or even if you did believe me, you wouldn't remember, and everything would change even more." Then, with a small smile, he looked up to meet MJ's eyes. "But then you read my letter, and you didn't remember. And what I had been scared of, was real. And still, you invited me up to your apartment to meet Ned. And that brief time just building a LEGO set with the three of us, was the most fun I'd had in years, and the closest I felt to being myself again." He stuffed his hands in his pockets, hiding a wince as he adjusted his posture. "I said to myself after I left the hospital that I'm not going to do this alone anymore, and if nothing else, you were right and Ned deserved to know the truth. It's why I walked up to him today in the first place. I didn't even think there was a world he'd have any memories of me," he let out a watery laugh. He looked up, and MJ saw a glimmer of hope betrayed in his eyes, and she knew what he was about to ask. "Do you-"

Before he could finish his sentence, MJ shook her head, feeling a buzzing in her fingers as they traveled up her chest to where her broken black dahlia necklace lay tucked under her shirt. "I'm sorry," she whispered, her voice cracking around the words, as her fingers traced the glass petals over the fabric. "Still nothing." Peter nodded, gulping as he looked away. "It's not that I don't believe you," she said, looking back at him. "I just, I don't know you. Not like you say you know me. And the fact that you have all these memories, and it's just blank…" she trailed off. "I don't know, Peter. It's just a lot to wrap my head around." The feelings that stirred in her as she sat on her old school roof, clutching her necklace, lay unspoken.

Peter just nodded again, smiling sadly. "It's okay, MJ," he said, shrugging. "I'm not really expecting anything, honestly. It's enough if we are friendly, that's all I'd want."

Before MJ could answer, a million thoughts in her head, the front door opened and Ned walked in with three pizza boxes balanced on one arm. "Okay, a bit of a journey to get it, there was a whole thing that happened with the guy delivering it. But, we have prevailed!" He set down the pizza on their coffee table. "Peter, I did just guess your pizza preferences, but it should be fine, right? I figured it should be okay, you'd probably need something bulkier being Spider-Man, also cuz you like just got out of the hospital so you'd probably need it."

At that second, MJ grabbed her laptop from her desk and stepped back towards her bedroom door. "Actually, you guys go ahead. I got some stuff to finish off, I'm not super hungry," she said, moving away from the two.

Ned looked up at her, eyes squinting in surprise. "MJ, are you sure?" he asked, a bit concerned. But Peter looked back at her, and that resignation returned to his eyes. She felt a bit guilty then, both that she was turning away right now, and also that she hadn't actually been completely honest earlier. But there was just too much going on in her head, and she needed a second to breathe, and pull herself together. And, she didn't want to bring down Ned's happiness from reconnecting with another best friend of his.

"Yeah yeah, " MJ said quickly, schooling her expression. "These job aren't going to apply to themselves," she joked, turning into her room. But she stopped, turning around to look at Peter. "I'll catch you next time, yeah?"

Surprised, Peter looked up at her, registering what she had just said as what it was: a start, just not right now. He smiled, and nodded. "Sure thing," she heard him say, as she shut her bedroom door.

Ned and Peter's voices carried through the walls, and she could tell that they had almost immediately settled into a familiarity that felt bone-deep. MJ took a deep breath, shakily exhaling as she tried to sort through her mind.

She hadn't exactly said the truth out there, to Peter. It wasn't just a blank in her head. She looked down, pulling out the black dahlia necklace from under her shirt to see it glint in the light. She hadn't worn it much in years, only a few occasions every now and then when the outfit called for it. For some reason, every time she had looked at it while in MIT, it filled her with a strange sense of sadness and grief, so she had left it locked away with other jewelry most of the time. But, ever since being caught in that weird mind control bubble, something about it called to her. And she could bet all her money that it had something to do with Peter Parker.

But the thought of talking about missing memories, of learning these things about another version of her that had been so deeply loved, it frankly scared her. In the past few days, everything she had thought about her life and how it had progressed had essentially been flipped on its head because of a letter. But Michelle Jones was nothing if not rational. And rationally speaking, the MJ Peter Parker had written about was not her. If memories make up a person, that it stands proven that she was not the same person. So, it wouldn't change anything if she heard about the memories they had shared together. She clutched the broken black dahlia in her fist, softly smiling as she heard Peter laugh at something Ned had said.

That didn't mean they couldn't be friendly. There were worse people in the world to be friendly with than Peter Parker, she figured. With that, she pushed herself away from the door to actually sit back down with those job applications. She'd give Ned and Peter the time they needed together first.

Peter Parker became a regular fixture in their apartment, from that day on.

Apparently, he hadn't told Ned everything day one, which was understandable. But, it didn't seem like Ned needed the full catalogue of memories that Peter held to know how to bring him back into his everyday life. Pretty soon, MJ got used to hearing, "Oh by the way, Peter's coming over tonight," from Ned, even coming to expect it on the days she knew Ned had no other outstanding plans with colleagues or friends from Boston.

It wasn't smooth sailing immediately, with them. MJ remembers that first day was the hardest. Peter had gone home after Ned needed some time to process everything he'd heard, learning just how far back their friendship had gone, and how many years and memories were no longer in his head, how many things had felt just slightly off but he had brushed aside under the excuse of 'no one really remembers their childhood well anyway'. So to hear that basically, most of the experiences you remembered having somewhat alone had actually been with another person, was a jarring experience. But, after that first day, Ned still wanted Peter back around. And Peter always answered when Ned called.

Since then, it had been a slew of movie marathons, Beast Slayer sessions, and Ned insisting he 'needed to give Peter the true 20s experience' once he heard that being Spider-Man took so much of his life that he hadn't really done many of the quintessential parts of being in your early 20s in a big city.

Soon enough, MJ also started joining in on the times they hung out in their apartment, weeknights after work and weekends falling into a routine. After Ned got off work and Peter finished his shifts at Delmar's, and on the days when Peter wouldn't be swinging around the city as its masked savior, they would park themselves on MJ and Ned's couch with either a movie, a video game, or a new LEGO set. MJ would follow close behind, either coming back from job interviews Ned or her boyfriend Paul would recommend her for, or emerging from her room after yet another unsuccessful day of job hunting. Some days, she'd come back from volunteering, just needing something to do with all the time she had searching for something with meaning. They'd order food, grab a drink or something, and then, they'd spent their time together in ease. MJ would usually perch on the armchair across from them, just watching as Ned and Peter rambled on, the very picture of best friends. Sometimes, she would sketch them like she had that first time, throwing in deadpan comments and observations of her own. It felt normal.

That normalcy would shift anytime memories came into the picture, though.

It wasn't that MJ didn't want Ned to hear about these things. She was really happy for him, because every time Peter shared a memory, no matter how small, Ned had this look in his eyes that she could tell came from something just clicking again. That even though the image wasn't there, the feelings were. But she would be lying if she said it wasn't starting to get to her, just a bit.

Because the thing was, as forthcoming as Peter was with his memories to Ned, he hesitated a lot more with her. MJ could probably count on one hand the memories he had relayed that involved her, and those were all in relation to memories with Ned. She figured he was respecting the fact that, as far as he knew, she didn't have the same kind of lingering echoes of memories that Ned did. That she had made it clear that the MJ she was now was different to the MJ he had known, implying that knowing the memories wouldn't change anything. But, unfortunately for her, she was also obsessed with figuring things out. And if there was something in front of her that was unknown, she had this need to resolve it and understand and learn more about it enough to solve it. She liked knowing things, and she liked figuring stuff out.

So, following that logic, hearing Peter's accounts of their memories was necessary information to piece together who this other Michelle Jones was. And maybe, answering that question would answer another question hidden under it: what did it feel like she was waiting for, and why did nothing feel complete enough the past few years?

Okay, so two questions.

The problem was, she now needed to figure out how to get Peter Parker to spill the beans, or at least start to spill he beans. Because, not even considering the difference in his disclosures, he was just, different with her. She knew every time he looked at her, she was remembering what she'd said to him at Frank's. That she didn't love him, she didn't even know him. And she was painfully aware of the fact that Peter still loved her. There was a little development, though. He didn't look at her with as much sadness anymore, and she would go so far to say as they were on the closer side of friendly with each other. He'd started taking her sarcastic quips, and making some of his own right back. But, it was never just the two of them spending time together. They were only ever around each other when Ned was there, and as soon as Ned needed to go, so did Peter. She guessed that in Peter's head, Ned had made it clear he wanted to know more, so maybe that's what she needed to do as well. And to do that, she'd need to get some time with him alone.

It was a LEGO set building night, food of choice being Thai food from the restaurant down the street, and seltzers to wash it down. Ned and Peter were apparently working their way through a Millennium Falcon set that Spider-Man somehow managed to get his hands on ("You'd be surprised what people are willing to give you for saving them, I didn't even really ask!"), and MJ, who initially was supposed to be out meeting Paul's work friends, had plopped down on her usual seat declaring that her plans changed and she was instead stuck with them (she didn't feel the need to mention that she had, infact, cancelled those plans with a text and a vague explanation). There hadn't been much talking this time, but that gave MJ enough time to observe Peter, sketching him into her notepad. She did like to sketch people in crisis back in high school, after all.

Did his MJ sketch him at some point?

"Man, it would be crazy to be in a spaceship at some point," Ned sighed, setting down the section he was working on. He turned to Peter, head tilted. "You did that, didn't you? I mean, I don't remember it as you but, Spider-Man was on the spaceship just before the Blip. That's what the news said, right?"

Peter breathed out a chuckle, nodding as he picked up some more pieces, glancing back at the build manual. "Yeah, yeah I was on it. Not a fun experience to wake up after 5 years on a different planet, I'll tell you that much," he said, before perking up and looking back at Ned with a smile. "Actually, you helped me get on that ship in the first place!"

"No way!" Ned exclaimed, leaning forward instantly, and MJ felt that pang in her heart again, as she saw Ned gain another memory for his growing collection. "I helped you? How??"

"Yeah yeah yeah. We were on a field trip to MOMA," Peter said, clicking more pieces together as he narrated the story. "My Spidey senses kicked in I guess, and I saw that giant spaceship and knew I had to go to it. But we were on the bus, and obviously I couldn't just leave. So I asked you to create a distraction, and you did!" Peter laughed to himself, shaking his head. "I think your exact plan was to scream that we were all going to die, and then make everyone run to the back of the bus, so I could get out through one of the windows."

MJ watches Ned take in that information, laughing along with Peter as he imagined it in his mind. And she ached. Because somehow, she could see it in her mind as well. And it fit so well, but also fought against every single thing she knew about their lives so far. She remembered that MOMA field trip, she remembered Ned screaming that they were all going to die, and she remembered everyone rushing to the back seats of the bus, where she had been sitting. But she didn't remember Peter there, and yet she could picture the webs 'thwip'-ing open the window and him sneaking out to be a hero.

Right then, she felt selfishly robbed of the same experience as Ned, because Peter Parker was never going to be the one to say anything first, because he felt like he needed to meet her where she was at. And apparently where she was at, was at arm's length distance. At least until she made the move to step closer.

Pretty abruptly, the conversation came to a halt, as Ned's smart watch started throwing up alerts for Spidey Tracker. Puzzled, he looked up at Peter (who was infact, the Spidey being tracked), before opening his phone and groaning out loud.

"Nooo, no no no," Ned moaned, standing up. "Great, someone decided it would be super fun to DDoS the network, and now reporting service is down, the chatrooms are frozen, and I need to go and fix everything."

"Oh that sounds like it sucks," MJ said, looking up at Ned from her place on the chair. "How long do you think it'll take to fix?"

Ned shook his head, shoulders slumping. "No clue. Could be anywhere from 30 minutes to hours." He walked over to his room, already furiously typing away at his phone, probably to the devs he worked with. "I'm gonna sort this out, sorry to cut LEGO night short Peter," he said, looking up at Peter.

"You're all good, take your time man," Peter said calmly, setting down what he was working on. "If you want, I can head out then-"

"No, no need!" Ned jumped in, but his words collided with-

"You can stay," MJ said, looking directly at him. "Ned said it may just take a little bit, so you don't need to leave right now," she continued, gesturing with her pencil. "Besides, you still haven't finished your pad Thai," she said, looking down to make sure no one caught the way her cheeks flushed.

Peter just sat there, like a deer in headlights, glancing between Ned and MJ, his eyes snagging on her more. Then, after what felt like ages, he sagged back down on the floor, shoulders dropping a bit from their raised state. "Only if it's not a problem," he settled on, and Ned immediately refuted that, promising to be back with an update ASAP before shutting his bedroom door.

Well, misfortune breeds opportunity. Or however that saying goes.

The silence wasn't the easy silence of a group sitting in each other's company anymore. There was now a livewire in the air, holding tension with it. MJ glanced up at Peter, who was keeping his eyes fixed on the LEGO pieces, fiddling with different things sprawled on the desk. And then, she decided to take a leap.

"So, did I do anything like that?" she asked, surprised at how tentative she sounded.

"Do what?" Peter asked, looking up in confusion.

"Did I do anything like Ned to help you go be Spider-Man?" she asked, feeling her heart in her throat. It was the first time she had directly asked anything about these missing memories, and she had no idea how Peter was going to react to it. But also, it really was her only way to get anything. She set her pencil down, and continued, "I mean I assume I must've, given we were… you know. But, I just wanted to know if anything specific came to your mind."

Peter blinked rapidly, as if unable to believe what he was hearing. He shook his head once, before a small smile made its way to his face. "Yeah, yeah you did help a lot. Once you figured it out. Actually, you helped with something major pretty soon after you figured it out."

"Figured what out?"

"That I was Spider-Man."

MJ laughed, because of course. "So you're telling me you didn't actually tell me, I just figured out that you were Spider-Man? Damn, I was good even back then," she said smugly, feeling a latent sense of pride for that version of MJ.

Peter rolled his eyes, laughing. "You actually told me you were only 67% sure once I actually confessed the truth to you, so I wouldn't be that confident now," he replied, smirking. "So, I'm still going to take it as a win on my part."

"Right, right, so you're already walking back the fact that you admitted I had figured it out, I see how it is."

"I'm just pointing out the complete facts! You need that to make an informed judgment about the situation."

"Oh, is that so? Well, would you have admitted it if I hadn't said it in the first place?"

At that, Peter stopped short, and MJ knew she had won. He caught her eye, and they both dissolved into giggles.

"Okay okay," he said, raising his hands in mock surrender. "So you figured it out." He rubbed his eyes before continuing, "Anyway, as part of you proving you had figured it out, you pulled out this high-def projector with webs on it. And while you were showing it to me, it seemed to trigger the holograms that Mysterio had used to fool everyone into thinking Elementals were attacking. If you hadn't gotten that, and you hadn't shown it to me, I would've had no idea he had played me." Peter sobered up a bit, sinking into his seat. "You kinda saved the world, MJ."

MJ caught the way the mood had turned, and sensed that there was a lot more to this Mysterio thing than Peter was letting on. But him saying she saved the world? She felt a warmth in her chest at that, at the way he said it with such conviction. He truly believed that. She took a deep breath, and asked, "What happened then?"

Peter blinked, coming out of his thoughts at MJ's question, before smiling sadly. "That story is a bit too long," he said. "But short version, it worked. I managed to beat him, thanks to you figuring it out, and helping me figure it out."

There was a lot he wasn't saying, but MJ decided to ignore it. She hadn't even expected him to give her an answer, so this was further than she had thought she would get. "Thank you," she said quietly, giving Peter a small smile. "For telling me about it. It's nice, hearing how you talk about her," she continued, picking up her pencil again. "That MJ. I'd like to know more about her, if you're okay with me asking?" She ignored the way she belatedly realized that she had referred to the other MJ as herself the entire time, and how she felt everything Peter said like it was her own. It just made it easier to ask him about, she reasoned.

She could see many emotions go through Peter's eyes then. Confusion, guilt, sadness, but settling on something that was a complicated mix of all those and acceptance. "Of course it's okay. I'll try my best to answer," he replied, moving to pick up the LEGO pieces her had been working on. "If you'll also let me get to know this MJ a bit more, if you're okay with that," he added almost nervously. "I know it's probably weird for you, me being here, given everything you know. But, before everything, we were friends, me and, and that MJ. And I would really like to be your friend, if that's possible."

"Yes, I'd like that too," she said almost immediately. She didn't need to think twice about that one. "I'd like to get to know you too, Peter Parker. To be your friend."

At that, Peter smiled the widest he had in all the time since she'd met him, and MJ felt that warmth from earlier spread everywhere. And she decided that Peter Parker had a lovely smile, and it was a shame it had been gone for so long.

She started to sketch again, focusing her attention on Peter's face, when she broke the silence again. "By the way," she said, leaning in with a conspiratorial air. "If Ned ever tries to get you to try Sharkfire, turn and run. And, maybe get me his spare bottles. Between the two of us, I think we can make sure he doesn't touch those again."

Peter's eyes twinkled, but he nodded with faux-seriousness at that. "You got it," he said, before bursting out laughing again. It may not have even been that funny, but the tension had broken, and MJ felt the smile come easier than it ever had.

Ned came back eventually, having managed to fix things fairly quick, and he could immediately sense that things had shifted slightly. Peter and MJ were talking about nothing and everything, holding easy conversation as he walked back in.

"You guys good?" he asked, turning more to look at MJ.

MJ nodded, answering, "Oh yeah, I was just warning Parker here about your evil ways regarding that heart palpitating energy drink you just can't let go of." She narrowed her eyes, tilting her head as if studying a suspect. "You wouldn't happen to have hidden any in your room now, would you?"

Ned groaned, plonking himself back down next to Peter, who was thoroughly enjoying this display. "MJ, a man is allowed his vices," he argued. "It isn't even that bad! I guarantee you, there are worse energy drinks out there than this one. Peter, back me up here."

Peter shrugged, mouth twisted in a laugh. "I don't know man, I think anything that says it has the 'fire of a thousand suns', doesn't sound like its something you need to be consuming."

"Oh, come on! I thought you'd be on my side! Imagine having that, wouldn't it make being Spider-Man easier?"

"I think we should never find out what it's like to be Spider-Man on Sharkfire, and that's for everyone's good."

MJ smiled, laughing to herself as she watched the back and forth, until she felt an insistent vibration against her left hip. She reached down, grabbing her phone to see a missed call from Paul, and she felt her smile slip slightly. He'd been texting her before that as well, all variations on asking her why she had cancelled. "Hey, you guys keep going, I just gotta, take this," MJ said, standing up to go back to her room. She went in and shut her door before she heard any replies, pressing Paul's contact to return the call. "Hey, how was drinks?"

"Would've been better if you were here," she heard Paul say, the background noise of the bar seeping in through the mic. "How come you cancelled? We'd been thinking about meeting up with everyone for a while now."

MJ shrugged, before realizing Paul couldn't see her. Duh. "I told you I wasn't really feeling it today," she said, feeling her voice grow more tired. And bless Paul's heart, his work friends were all typical finance bros and their conversations were duller than bricks. "Just wanted a quiet night in with Ned, and he had a friend over to chill."

"Oh, who's this friend of Ned's?" Paul asked, and MJ cursed herself for mentioning Peter to him. And then she chided herself for cursing herself for that.

"Just, some guy from his childhood," she answered noncommittally. "They ran into each other again once we came back from Boston, and they've been hanging out again. It's nice." What else was she supposed to say? It's not like it was a lie, but she was leaving out quite a large part of the story. He also is apparently my friend, and we knew each other and were infact in love, but he erased everyone's memories of him existing to fix a problem he hasn't really mentioned, because the kicker is he is also Spider-Man, isn't that crazy?

"Sweet, that's nice," Paul said, and she heard someone come over and exchange some words with him, but the voice was too muffled. "Oh sorry, Brad's telling me we're heading to another place, apparently they have better deals on beer flights. Listen, are you sure you don't want to come out? It's like I barely see you these days, ever since your housewarming party. Not to mention, you just, vanished for like a whole day, and since you got back you've been more-"

"More what?" MJ cut in. "More withholding, like you call it?"

"MJ, come on," Paul sighed. "Can we not do this now, please? You know what I mean."

MJ exhaled, squeezing her eyes shut as she pinched the bridge of her nose. "I'm tired, Paul. That's all there is to it. This job hunt has just been stressing me out, and I just didn't want to go out tonight."

Paul was silent for a moment, and MJ wondered if someone else had walked up to him and started talking. But then, he spoke up again, "Okay MJ," he said, sounding resigned, and MJ felt a pit in her stomach because she knew he had a lot more to say but it had all already been said. "I hope you feel better soon. Maybe we can go out tomorrow, just you and me? We can have a nice dinner and walk by the river. Just, get back to ourselves. And you can tell me all about you job hunt as well."

MJ dropped her hand, taking a deep breath. She could still just about hear Peter laughing at some joke Ned had just made, and she had never felt so torn. But, she knew the right thing to do. And just because Peter Parker was (back) in her life and telling these memories of another version of her, it didn't change anything about the person she was right now. And she had a lovely boyfriend who liked her, who she had left on the back-burner as life got too crazy. So, she rallied herself, reaching out to redo her lipstick. "No, it's okay. Just text me where you guys are going next and I'll be there in 15 or 20, give or take 5. Depends on where you guys are going and how long the train takes," she said, ignoring the exhaustion she felt at the agreement. "And we can also go out tomorrow, if that's what you want. It would be nice to just go out the two of us again, it's been a while."

Seemingly happy, Paul told her the name of the place they were all going to next, and MJ had to suppress a groan as she calculated just how long it would take if she had to wait for the next train, and how much time it would take to just walk there. But she plastered on a smile, and got off the phone with her, grabbing all her things that lay ready on her bed before she spontaneously decided to cancel, and stepped out of her room.

"Well, night's still young so, don't have too much fun without me," she announced, and Ned and Peter looked up at her as she walked over to the front door, pulling on her nice shoes. "Plans got moved back so I'm able to make it now."

"Oh, so you are seeing Paul then?" Ned asked, smirking. MJ stiffened a bit, looking over at Peter to see how he reacted. But he just smiled back at her, having gotten pretty good at schooling his expressions to hide how it hurt.

"Whatever, its him and some work friends of his," MJ replied, feigning nonchalance. "I'll probably be back later, but if it gets too late I'll just crash at his."

"Have fun, MJ," Peter said with a smile, and she forced herself to look away, and leave her apartment, before she did something stupid like cancel all her plans again just to sit on a couch and ask about Peter's memories of another MJ.

(As the night progressed, and the group got louder and the conversations turned to markets and deals, she wondered what the other MJ would have told her to do.)

It became a sort of pattern, after that night. Whenever they would be alone, MJ would find a way to ask Peter about a memory, and wait for him to tell her all about it. And she'd add another piece to this jigsaw puzzle, ignoring the way every memory seemed to tug at something deep in her chest in a way that felt dangerously close to right. She'd hear Peter talk about it, see the way he smiled as he reminisced, and MJ would take every second and every piece he gave, because it was still rare to hear him talk about that other MJ. Now, every page with a sketch was accompanied by entries of every memory she found out.

A sketch of Ned and Peter in a vicious video game battle, their taunts and battle cries getting more and more ridiculous as the game went on. Accompanied by a carefully written note: He was on the Academic Decathlon team. Figures. Apparently, his MJ had to take his place during Nationals when he didn't show up cuz of Spider-Man stuff, but the win stayed the same for both of us. Spider-Man did save us at the Washington Monument that day. I remember that day. It was the first time I admitted I had friends. I wonder if it was the first time for her as well.

A sketch of Peter frowning at his laptop screen, trying to sort out E.V's scanning capability with some help from Ned and MJ, after he had started spending more and more time at theirs, even with Spider-Man stuff going on. Along with: Turns out she did sketch him. Apparently he was in detention after he lost the Spider-Man suit Iron Man gave him and he was back to being a normal guy, so of course she took the chance to watch him and commit his features to paper. Even if it was framed as a joke. Am I seeing what she saw?

Peter in his Spider-Man suit but without his mask, poking around at his lenses to fix their opening and closing, tongue sticking out between his teeth as he focused in. And: He still has his old high-school phone because of all the voicemails she had left him over the years. She drove a hard bargain - info from the meeting for the Europe class trip that he had to skip out on while being a masked vigilante, in exchange for 2 fresh churros. Apparently, he got that while swinging back from a scene and instantly stopped by at the local churro truck that he knew she loved, and made sure they were fresh and loaded with cinnamon sugar. Then he tripped over almost every sentence when giving them to her, all while apologizing for ditching. She probably didn't care how he sounded, just that he had actually gotten them. That he'd listened. If she was anything like me, she probably just saw a cute, sweet guy, who was trying to do good things for her.

But there weren't just memories or sketches on those pages. Pretty soon, MJ started writing down everything else she noticed and learnt about Peter Parker.

I'm both surprised that he developed the web fluid he used to use by himself at 14, but also not that surprised. I mean he has been doing all this all these years. Not that he needs it anymore, because apparently it just comes out of him now??? And apparently his eyes sometimes go fully black, like a demon. Or a spider, I guess. That would make more sense.

Guy's a bonafide dumpster diver. Turns out everything he has, he either got it from people leaving it on the side of the street, or from FB Marketplace. Only sometimes has he actually dove into a dumpster but "sometimes you just need to do it."

So he can somehow withstand being thrown around by every criminal ring in the city, but some extra spicy hot sauce is what takes him down in one fell swoop. Weakness found, all supervillains watch out.

He's a Mets fan. As if he hasn't suffered enough.

Turns out his favorite sandwich place is also Delmar's, which is weird considering he works there. I guess that makes sense. When you're all alone and no one remembers you, at least you have something keeping you grounded? Also, his order is a number 5 with pickles, smushed flat. Just incase it ever comes up. A thank-you for all the saving he does. And just for being around.

He's the happiest I have ever seen him, and yet he still feels sad. And he still won't just talk to me about memories until I bring it up. We're friends, I hope? So why does it still feel too far? He knows that he can talk to me right? He doesn't just have Ned, he has me too.

Her notebook became almost a dedicated study log: the investigation into the other Michelle Jones, and knowing Peter Parker.

Thesis statement - By understanding and learning more about the MJ Peter Parker remembered, she would be able to understand more about who Peter Parker was himself, and who he was to her.

Null Hypothesis - Learning about these memories that were no longer MJ's, and in turn learning more about Peter Parker and how he saw his MJ and himself, would not change how MJ felt about the emptiness in her mind and life.

She sighed, leaning back in her chair, away from her desk where that very notebook was open. If Ned knew about it and how much she flicked through it, he'd call her "deeply invested". If Paul knew about it, he'd call her "obsessed".

I'm not obsessed with him, I'm just very observant.

Not that it mattered much what Paul knew anymore. MJ looked down at her phone lighting up with a message from him, and she squeezed her eyes shut. Their break-up had been a long time coming, honestly. Their relationship could work in Boston, where classes and finals were easy excuses for ducking out and spending time apart, especially in that final semester. But, once home and in the real world, all that time spent trying to avoid going deeper couldn't just be explained away. She said that he pried too much, that he expected her to answer everything, he couldn't just let her be. But that may have been a bit unfair to him. Sure, he did push a bit more to try and get her to answer anything about high school or her life in New York, and he did get that disappointed and frustrated look in his eyes when she would avoid it. But what did she expect, her boyfriend to not take an interest in her life?

Maybe she just was that withholding. But how could she be withholding when she didn't have answers to his questions most of the time? The one time she had tried to explain how it felt to try and remember those years, how there was this smudged emptiness that didn't feel explainable, he had laughed, holding her face in his hands. "The ever-mysterious MJ," he had said, "You really have a way with words," indicating he hadn't taken it super seriously. He just thought it was the dark side of her humor making an appearance. She never really corrected him after that.

He had been upset though, when she had met him at their regular cafe just to tell him that she felt they should stop seeing each other. And still, even in that final conversation, she couldn't answer his question. Why?

MJ pressed a hand to the back of her neck to massage it, as she absent-mindedly traced the pages of her notebook with her other hand. How was she supposed to articulate an answer to 'why' that didn't sound absolutely insane? That didn't raise more questions that she just didn't have the answers to?

(There was one part of the answer that she did know, she just didn't want to admit it.)

The recent break-up was the only reason she was not outside in the living room with Ned and Peter like she usually would be. The moment Ned found out, he immediately hugged her, saying, "Whatever you need, you got it." He then said she was allowed to spend as much time wallowing in her room as she wanted until she felt better, and MJ would gladly take the time to just sit and think, sort through the confusing thoughts in her head.

Peter's reaction had been… interesting. He'd found out from Ned later so she hadn't seen his initial reaction, but in the brief moments she had ventured outside her room to grab water, he had stood in front of her. "I'm really sorry MJ," he'd said quietly, and she had searched his tone for anything else, but all she had felt was him genuinely feeling sorry. "Are you doing okay?"

She'd sighed shakily, looking away from him. "It's whatever, you know? Guess there was a limit to how withholding I could be," she'd answered, shrugging.

Peter had simply smiled, returning a shrug of his own before stepping out of her way. "Welcome to the club," he'd said, before heading into Ned's room (apparently they were working on something related to E.V and Peter's enhanced arachnid DNA, and trying to spec out different metrics for it to track). She'd stood there in the kitchen with her glass of water for a bit after, head lost in the callback he'd just made, before shaking it off and heading back inside her room.

Which is where she had been since, just lost in thought. She looked back down, realizing her fingers had been subconsciously tracing Peter's face from her latest sketch (it was Peter sat on their fire escape when he thought no one else was looking), and she slammed the notebook shut, groaning. She needed to get a grip. Maybe it was a mistake trying to seek out these memories. What was she even trying to prove or figure out?

But the problem was, she didn't really want to stop learning more about the other MJ. Because, even though the memories Peter shared were mostly light and fun, and the nicer memories you'd share while reminiscing, MJ knew the looming topic at hand: the spell. Which changed who that other MJ was, and how she viewed her. This girl who had been put in some impossibly scary and confusing situations, but had managed to find someone so willing to stand by her that she was willing to open up and do it all. This girl who, 4 years younger than her right now, was still braver than anything MJ currently felt. Who had let herself love, and be loved, so deeply. So even though, Peter kept the cards of their actual relationship closer to her chest, MJ felt the love that was there. You didn't need a genius to be able to see that.

She had to admit, she was jealous of that other MJ. She would've known how to handle the situation with Paul. She probably wouldn't have even ended up in that position. Not for the first time, MJ wondered where she ended, and the other MJ began, and how similar or different they really were.

Her thoughts were interrupted by noises back out in her living room. From the sound of it, Ned was retiring for the night, which meant Peter would most likely be heading home. Still to be decided if he would be heading out via the front door, or by swinging out the fire escape if the city needed Spider-Man. She sighed, standing up from her desk. She at least wanted to see him once before he left. And then she could go back to staring at her ceiling.

She opened the door, catching Peter by surprise, who seemed to be heading over to her bedroom door. "Oh! Hey," she said, feeling a smile on her face grow unconsciously.

"OH, MJ, hi," Peter said in surprise, looking back at Ned's bedroom door that had just closed. "I, uh, Ned and I managed to get E.V to stabilize with the whole organic side of things. She was not a fan of the enhanced arachnid DNA," he said, letting out a laugh. "But I think he had an early start tomorrow so, he did very politely kick me out."

"Sounds like him," MJ said. She felt a pang of sadness as she saw Peter's body turn towards the door. "So, you're heading out then?"

"Yeah, yeah probably," Peter replied, balancing on the balls of his feet. "You know, the city may not sleep, but I think Spider-Man just might have to tonight."

"Wow, Peter Parker admitting he needs to rest for once? Now that's something you don't hear all the time."

"Yeah you know, I'm trying this new thing called 'work-life balance'. Super niche."

"Oh yeah? How's that been treating you?"

"Great, yeah I don't itch to get out there at all," Peter deadpanned, before he and MJ burst into laughter. As the laughter died down, Peter's smile softened. "Honestly though, it's hard sometimes. To remember I need to just pause every once in a while. But, you guys help. To remind me to give Peter Parker the time he needs as well."

MJ smiled, leaning against her door. "Yeah well, we like having you around. Both Peter Parker and Spider-Man," she said softly, and she could've sworn she saw a twinkle in Peter's eyes. but it was probably the way the living rooms lights caught his eyes, nothing else. So she straightened up, patting her door. "Well, I won't keep you any longer, just… wanted to say goodnight before you left. Sorry for not being around as much today."

"No no, it's okay," Peter said quickly, shaking his head. "I said it earlier too, but I'm sorry MJ. Hope you're doing okay. I'm around if you just, ever wanna chat."

MJ's cheeks flushed at the sincerity of his request, and she ducked her head to avoid him noticing. "Yeah, 'course," she breathed. "Well, I don't wanna keep you here, you do need that rest after all. Goodnight, Peter," MJ said before shutting the door. She caught a brief bit of Peter probably saying goodnight back, before she dropped her head against her now-shut bedroom door, taking a deep breath.

There was the part of the 'why' that she was so hesitant to admit.

MJ wasn't someone who usually remembered her dreams. Well, you're not actually supposed to remember your dreams unless you had more wakefulness periods in your night, but that was a whole other story. But in the 4 years after senior year, the way she forgot her dreams felt more like waking up trying to grasp at something that had been right in her hands, but still just about losing her grip of it. Those mornings, she'd wake up with a monster headache and a bone-deep frustration that nothing could fix, until she had sufficiently distracted herself. Guess she now knew why that was, if the pieces were to be put together.

Now though, since reading that letter Peter had left in Frank's house and being caught in that damn bubble from Roosevelt Island, she'd started remembering more. Or, remembering wasn't the right word, because that would imply actually regaining those memories. But, her dreams had started containing the pictures Peter would paint for her with every memory she asked about. They didn't look quite right, more like an off-center version of the truth. Like describing a dog to someone who hadn't seen one, and then asking them to redraw it. But the feeling, the warmth of his smile and his care for her, and the way she felt the walls lower around him, that was all still there.

And soon enough, it wasn't just recited memories he had handed to her. It was the everyday moments she was now sharing with him. And those were clear as day. She could feel the texture of the Magic the Gathering cards in her hands from the day Ned tried to teach them the game, Peter's laugh ringing in her ears. She could smell the burnt tomato from the day she and Peter had attempted to master bolognese, the mad scramble to shut off the smoke alarm giving her heart a rush. She could feel the warmth of Peter's arm pressed against hers, sat between her and Ned for their marathon of the 'Alien' franchise, and she couldn't ignore the way it felt like sparks were flying, while still being the most settled she had felt in a while.

All her dreams involving Peter, all were colored in a kaleidoscope of feelings she knew she wasn't feeling for Paul. Paul was nice, he was kind, he tried. But something had always felt missing, and it had always bugged her how she never seemed to feel the full force of affection for him. She had figured she might as well suck it up, because he was a good man, and they were happy enough, and this was adulthood. Sometimes, relationships are just hard work. But maybe, the hard work needed something to show for it eventually, and she didn't get the sense it would with Paul.

But maybe…

MJ got the sudden urge to see Peter again. Yes, she had just told him goodnight, and he really did need to sleep (because him saying himself he needed to rest was a sign that yeah he needed it), but she just… She had another hypothesis, and she really needed to test it out. So, feeling her heart thud in her ears (she would blame the spontaneous decision-making), she straightened up and yanked her door open-

Only to see Peter still in front of her bedroom door, arm raised to knock.

"Oh shit-" "Whoa, hey-"

Their words tripped over each other's, like they had the first day he stepped back into their lives. MJ let out a shocked laugh, feeling her surprise mirrored on Peter's face. "You first," she breathed.

Peter looked dazed for a second, before shaking his head. "Sorry, yeah. Um," he stuttered, before squaring his shoulders. "I know I just said I need to sleep and stuff, and I probably should honestly. But, I'm not really ready for the night to be over yet, if that makes sense? And I know you probably don't really want to be around people right now, which is really fair, I get it. But, I'd regret not just asking, so-"

"Yes," MJ cut him off, smiling.

Peter paused, blinking. "Uh, yes? You wanna hang out?"

"Yes," MJ repeated. "And preferably not in our apartment. Love the place, but I've spent too long cooped up in my room, and I just want to go outside."

"Okay! We can do that!" Peter said eagerly. "We can just, walk around outside then."

"Sounds great," MJ said, ignoring the way her face was heating up. "I'll meet you outside in 10 minutes?"

Peter laughed to himself, before looking back at her with a smirk. "See you outside in 5 minutes."

MJ rolled her eyes, laughing. "Whatever, dork," she said. As she closed her door to get ready, she felt a sense of déjà vu wash over her, and she smiled to herself. Well there's another memory, and this one she had figured out herself.

Within 5 minutes, wearing a more presentable outfit for the world outside her apartment, MJ was in her living room with Peter, who had been leaning against the kitchen counter.

"You ready?" he asked, and MJ nodded. "Where do you wanna go?"

"Who cares?" she answered, walking over to open the front door. Peter just laughed, following behind her as they head out.

It soon became pretty obvious that they were just walking aimlessly along, falling into step alongside each other as they turned and crossed roads wherever they felt like it. The streets were fairly busy but not the worst they had to offer, it being a Sunday night. The night was cooler than it had been lately, with a nice breeze blowing through the streets from the waterfront that wasn't too far from where they were. MJ saw Peter taking in a deep breath from her peripheral, his head craning back to look up as he seemed to savor the moment. She turned to look at him, her eyes catching on the way the lights and neon signs of nearby bars and restaurants caught in his hair. She could tell he was tired from how he was holding himself, but it wasn't the despaired exhaustion of the man she had seen stood in front of her when she confronted him about the letter. This time, it was just that good old tiredness you get after a long, long day of work. And she could also tell that, for the first time in probably years, he was actually content.

She wasn't blind. Peter was handsome, anyone could agree to that. But there's good-looking people who have shitty personalities, or are just overall uninteresting, making them dull and boring. But then there's people who, once you get to know them, their personality takes over their features and you can see all their best qualities written on their face in a beautiful way.

MJ could say with significant confidence that Peter Parker was one of the most beautiful people she'd ever met. And, she'd apparently met him twice. (She knew for a fact that if she had any way to contact the other MJ, she would agree).

"You know, having heightened sense means I can actually feel you staring at me," Peter said, pulling MJ out of her thoughts.

MJ scoffed, before narrowing her eyes back at him. "I was just thinking whether I should be the one to tell you there's a bug on your face or if your 'heightened senses' would get there first."

Peter's eyes widened, as he swatted his face. "No there isn't," he exclaimed, and MJ broke character, laughing.

"I'm messing with you," she said, patting his shoulder. His hands stopped flailing, and he looked back at her with mock betrayal.

"Wow, you think you can trust someone," he sighed dramatically, shoving his hands into his pockets.

"I just can't believe Spider-Man almost got taken out by a BUG," she giggled. Peter caught her eye, and soon he too broke into laughter.

Cheeks warm as they settled back into a comfortable silence, they continued down the streets, getting closer to the park by the waterfront. MJ crossed her arms over her chest, some of her ruminations from earlier coming back to the forefront of her mind.

"You know," she started, and she felt Peter's eyes jump to look over at her. "You've told me a lot of the memories you have of, you know… But you still haven't really told me about the big stuff that happened." She felt him stiffen next to her, but she needed to get it out. "I just, I want you to feel like you can tell me everything too, like you tell Ned. It's, kind of why I've been asking you more and more."

Peter was quiet for a bit. They'd reached the waterfront, where the wind had started to get stronger, and MJ pulled her jacket tighter around her. She turned to look at him, and she saw him gulp before he turned back to meet her eyes. "I do want to tell you," he started, his voice breaking. "It's just, those big ones, they're not as easy to get through. This time it's selfish on my part honestly. But also, I wait for you to ask because, I really don't wanna mess this up," he said, shakily. "You're really important to me MJ, and these past few months, being back in your life and being your friend, I really couldn't ask for more. I didn't wanna ruin that."

It was the first time since that first day that they'd really acknowledged it, Peter's feelings and the reality of their history. And MJ realized a second later that she hadn't separated it that time, calling it their history. The reality of their situation being they were basically exes, where one was still in love with the other because they'd separated due to extenuating circumstances (those being that the person had been erased from the other person's memories and mind altogether). The reality being that, in Frank's house, Peter had told MJ he loved her, and she had said she didn't love him, because she didn't know him.

MJ looked down at her hands, forehead scrunching. "You're really important to me too," she admitted back, squeezing her elbows. "And, you telling me these things won't ruin what we have. I mean, I'm asking, aren't I?" she said, letting out a quiet laugh. Peter smiled, breathing out a laugh of his own. "You can tell me anything."

Peter looked up at her, eyes glistening with tears unshed. "You sure? No take-backs after this," he joked, and MJ rolled her eyes.

"Yeah yeah," she replied, taking a step forward on the walkway along the water. "Hit me."

So Peter did. He told her about Mysterio, Tower Bridge, the broken black dahlia necklace that hung around her neck. He told her about how his identity was revealed, and how it felt like it was him, her and Ned against the world at school. He finally, finally told her about Doctor Strange, how the spell came about, and how multiverses interacted with each other, leading to the outcome they had now. And he told her about the 6 months they were together, caught in this whirlwind and craziness, where they only got one week of normalcy.

And MJ listened. She jumped in with questions every so often, but mostly she just let it all wash over her. She drank it all in, the good, the bad, the heartbreaking. She understood now why Ned needed to take a day to process everything, because hearing about everything that happened in the span of just a couple months was a lot. By the end, her mind was reeling, but she knew now. And 6 months isn't a lot in the grand scheme of things. She'd dated Paul for more than double that time. But it didn't matter, because she understood now how it had probably felt. She turned to Peter once it got quiet again, cheeks wet with tears that had been silently shedding.

"I really do see why," she started, her voice choking up. Peter looked back at her, matching her eyes in tears. "I see why I loved you."

Peter smiled, letting out a watery laugh. "And things like that, and who you are MJ, is why I still love you," he confessed. He immediately looked away, pulling at his fingernails. "I'm sorry, I know what you said, and I completely understand. I really did mean it when I said being your friend is all I could ask for. I just, I wanted you to know. That someone does love you, and always will."

MJ smiled, her cheeks flushed as stopped walking. Peter stopped as well, walking back a couple paces to join her. The silence between them was still easy, but MJ could feel a sense of nervousness from him. But she just wanted a bit to collect her thoughts, to put all the pieces of evidence together. Everything she had gathered from this conversation, all to serve the prove or disprove the hypothesis she had in her head when she opened the door that night to call back out to Peter Parker. She connected the dots, weighed everything up together, calculated the significance level, and drew her conclusion. And now, she knew.

"After I read the letter, I told you that all the memories you said we shared, I didn't have them," MJ started, and Peter turned to look at her. She kept her eyes out on the water. "I told you that I didn't love you. Because, I didn't know you."

She saw Peter nod solemnly, like he had already steeled himself for a painful truth. It made her heart twinge, that he was already ready to let go again, to walk away at the second if she indicated she wanted that. "I started asking you to tell me more about the memories you had with your MJ because, I was curious. Especially after you and Ned started talking about it more, I just… I wanted to know about her. I wanted to see how different we were, what she was like, why you loved her." She turned to look at Peter. "Then as time went on, I learnt more about her, sure. But I also learnt more about you. And somewhere along the way, you became a part of my everyday life as much as Ned. And I started to see it in front of me. The 'why'." She took a deep breath. "I don't think I'm every going to remember. Even with you telling me everything, I don't think it can fully come back to me."

At that, Peter stepped back, nodding to himself as if resigning himself to his fate, like he already knew what she was going to say. But MJ wasn't having it. Heart racing, she reached out her hand to cup his face, softly wiping away the tears on his cheeks. He froze in place, eyes fluttering shut at the contact, and she wondered how long it had been since someone had held Peter simply to hold him. His face was cool to the touch because of the wind, but she felt the warmth increase, and she rubbed her thumb on his cheek.

"Let me finish tiger," she said softly, and Peter laughed gently, fresh tears in his eyes. "But, I don't think it matters, if I remember or not. Because, I know you now. I know you, Peter Parker, in all your bravery, kindness, humor and dorkiness." MJ reached up her other hand, so she was now holding Peter's face, and she knew then that she had done this before. Because it felt like her hands fit to his face like pieces in a puzzle.

MJ guessed she could call it muscle memory, the way she leaned forward to kiss Peter. The moment their lips touched, instinct took over, and it just felt right. She felt him hold back for a bit, before letting himself kiss her back with all the love he had in him. His hands circled her waist, and she felt the same safety he gave her when he held her while swinging. She let her hands roam into his curls, and kissed the smile on his face. This is what it was supposed to feel like. Null Hypothesis: disproven.

She could feel tears in her eyes as she pulled away, and she wondered if Peter was picturing the last moments they'd had together all those years before, superimposed onto them now. Peter smiled, leaning forward so their foreheads rested against each other, noses touching. "I love you, MJ," he said again, but there was no painful undertone now.

MJ smiled, and for the first time in 4 years she didn't feel that numb emptiness at the back of her mind. Memories or not, she felt like everything was finally back in place. "I love you too, Peter."