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Being this close to his birth Father was something he never expected to happen.
The ninja were invited to a celebration for a new TV thingy, Jay wasn't so interested in what it was, and didn't know much about the celebrities starred in the thing, but they went anyway. He thought it would be something fun, to be close by Ninjago's biggest talents, living the life of a celebrity.
What he didn't expect was for Cliff Gordon to be coming.
Firstly, the main focus of the event was the premiere of a Documentary; when he first heard of it, he expected a nature documentary, or something else even more boring than that. He didn't expect it to be a documentary all about Ninjago Talent, each episode spanning the rise to fame of many of the celebrities in the room.
The ninja sat around a circular table, only six seats, so Cliff Gordon couldn't sit by him and drag him into awkward conversations around his friends. Jay frantically searched for answers on this Documentary Series; no episode on Cliff Gordon, so why would he even be here??
Regretfully, he didn't bother to check the guest list before he came, if he did, and saw the name Cliff Gordon right in front of his eyes, he would've found an excuse to not come. Now he was thinking that the other person had checked the guest list, and that's why he joined this after-party.
He wasn't at the earlier red-carpet event, if he was, he would have ducked home right after in hopes of not running into him at the after-party, which was probably the best place to swoop next to him and talk, without many people noticing.
There were still a few camera-crew and paparazzi at this event, but confined to the red-carpet, and seated areas for interviews.
Cliff Gordon had drifted out of the spotlight years ago, but by his own choice, he gradually started to live a private life, but that changed when knowing his birth son would be at the event. Now, he was chatting it up with the other big-names, drinking, laughing, being so extravagent in the same room as him.
He wouldn't know if he was looking at him, because his eyes were glued to his phone while the other ninja at the table talked.
Nya leaned over his lap and he flinched back, "What're you doing?"
"Oh, I'm…" he switched his phone off and shoved it into his pocket. Nya raised her eyebrows, she knew he was adopted, it wasn't a secret to anyone, he'd mentioned his adoptive status in passing to the others. Though, he hadn't talked much about it, his feelings, how weird it was that he witnessed his birth Father die in the alternate timeline, only for him to be standing tall, and healthy up there!
It confused him, Nadakhan didn't change the past, he was always adopted, and he made it clear you couldn't wish for death, but somehow, Cliff had died the moment he made the wish?
Maybe it had to do with his way of asking the wish; he didn't wish for his birth Father to die, only to be rich, so…he chose the quickest solution. Still, it didn't make much sense, that would be changing the past, making Cliff fall ill, wishes were complicated.
His feelings on him still being alive were complicated.
Jay never had much urgency to know his birth family, he had loving parents, and he never considered them not to be his parents, it didn't become weird, unnatural, or like he was looking at some strangers that took him in once he found out. The whole thing didn't feel very real.
That was until he walked into the same room as that man, and suddenly, it felt way too real. His dad was in the room.
And Cliff knew that, as he remembered that shrine on the wall in the secret room, a display of his suit, pictures and newspaper clippings of his achievements. He clearly loved him, or admired, maybe in a fan-boy way, but he did that from afar, he never tried to contact him these past few years, or ever….
Nya whipped her head around, she knew he was bothered by a particular person, maybe having seen his search, and went to look, though not discreetly at all. She was looking for too long, so Jay looked around too, but he immediately felt too exposed, so he dug his head into his chest, "Are you okay?" she asked, then grabbed his hand.
"Yeah, yeah, I'm fine." he answered and waved his hand, he couldn't see him, so maybe he went to the bathroom, went home? "You want another drink?" he asked, but Nya shook her head and lifted hers, brand-new.
They needed to be discreet, so he was glad the others weren't scrambling to ask the same thing, instead they still chatted and laughed away.
But… their suits weren't helping. For all these events, the organisers who invited them always insisted they wear some glammed up version of their GIs, a mix between a glamorous suit, with their ninja elements mixed in.
Lightning strikes lined his sides, and much of it looked like a regular GI besides the bedazzling of his tie, the collar, the cuffs of his sleeves and the patterned lines all up one blue sleeve, the other sleeve a plain, bright yellow. They stood out way too much.
And Nya couldn't spot who he was looking for.
Well, it was a fancy event, the tables organised, if people designated to other tables wished to talk, they were stood straight up, laughing like a snob at the wall.
A hand grabbed his shoulder, and Jay froze with a shaky smile on his face. When he didn't move, the grip went tighter, and now, the others looked, their conversations dimming. Jay took the squeeze as a command, and his body coaked like rusty gears as he twisted around.
Ah…
He was right behind him, grinning widely. He had his chair behind him, scooted between him and Cole to his left, then leaned back.
"I've been waiting for a chance to talk to you, ninja." he beamed, then swooped his arm over Jay's shoulder. He frowned, eyed Nya at his side, she caught him when he leaned over at Cliff's touch.
The ninja hesitantly waved, so maybe they'd noticed how freaked out he was, or were uncomfortable with how comfortable Cliff was. He pulled him closer, and Jay toppled into him, his chair nearly tipping over, "I've been wanting to meet you the most, lightning ninja, I admire your efforts to Ninjago the most."
Jay pulled his hand off him, then took in a deep breath, "Thanks, I appreciate that."
He sunk into his seat, then took a sip of his drink, his legs crossed and then his arms flung to his back, hanging off the edge of the chair squeezed in between them.
This was not the best time for their first meeting, he honestly expected to never meet him, and he came to peace with that. When the timeline reversed, Jay assumed it was only a matter of weeks before he'd hear the news of his birth Father passing. He didn't ever check for himself in the next few weeks, but when nothing came up on a TV, on the back of a Fritz-Donnagen comic book new release, he started to dig for some news of his death.
Having faced his death before, he was ready, he wasn't mentally prepared for a reality where he was…alive, able to contact him any second. For a few weeks after that, the image of Cliff Gordon faded from his mind, as the actor, and it was replaced with one thing - that letter that should be coming in the mail any minute now.
Except it never came, and instead, Cliff had defied fate and was sitting right beside him.
Suddenly, he ducked closer, spinning the drink and watching the liquid swirl around, "Please, I would love for some, um…" he murmured, Jay leaned back and looked to the side, where the others were looking on, ducked into the middle where they got a better view of his sweating, nervous face, "some interview time, I have many questions, and I'm sure the paparazzi would love it! The Blue Ninja, and me, Cliff Gordon."
Jay bounced his chair towards Nya, who he grabbed the hand of, and shook his head immediately, with the others watching, it was a little easier to say no, whereas alone would be… very confrontational. "Neither of us have an episode, we're here as guests, I- I don't think they're interested."
"Oh, come on!" Cliff grabbed Jay's other hand and dragged it into the air, "You, the Blue Ninja, elemental lightning, powerful, stopped the Overlord, Unagami, and the list goes on—"
"The others did that too, you don't need me, and I'm not the best in-front of a camera-" he lied, but Lloyd quickly arrived and yelled.
He was previously getting drinks for Cole and Kai, just came back, then jumped up with a scream. "You're Cliff Gordon!" he scurried around the tight, packed chairs, Cliff let go of Jay's hands, finally free, and they flopped to his side, the hand on Nya pried away and rushed to his chest as he breathed rapidly. "I'm a big fan of your movies, Jay got me into them, actually, if you want an interview with one of us ninja, I'd be happy to give you one!"
Suddenly, he grabbed Cliff and rushed for the front.
Hunching over, he grabbed the cloth of the table, his hand stayed clutching his shirt, and the others stared. Nya put a hand on his back, and he had to be glad the spotlights weren't over him right now like they were for Cliff and Lloyd, already at the seats being interviewed.
"Jay, that was—" Nya began, but cut herself off when the hand on his chest rushed for his head, clutching his hair so tight that the curls stretched into long strands. She hummed, and looked at the others, all with their questions.
Kai put his hands to the side of his mouth and mouthed the words, "Is he okay?", while he began standing up. Nya looked to him, hands on his face and gripping the table, and tapped him, "Jay, you wanna go somewhere private?"
Jay looked up, hands pulling away from his ears, and glasses nearly tipping over when he let go of the table, and spoke, "No, no, I-" he whipped around, then caught a glimpse of Cliff again. He was still sat with Lloyd, who may be interviewing him because of genuine excitement or because he knew of their relationship, but maybe he hadn't had the time to process that when his fan-boy-ness took over, "I- yeah…I need to go." he shot up and raced for a door, Nya waved for Kai and Cole to come over, and Zane stayed to watch the table.
—
In a dark hallway, Jay fell into a wall and onto the ground. Immediately, Jay punched the floor, "What's his deal?" he yelled, the. covered his mouth and looked around the place. It was a long hallway, they would see someone walking down for long enough to get away, but just in case, Cole found the light-switch.
"Wait, wait-" Kai jumbled, then tapped his foot, "You told us that…Cliff Gordon was…" he trailed off, thought for a second, his feet tapping the floor, then suddenly gasped and fell down, "Oh my gosh, that was your dad!"
Dad.
It felt too personal, too real. He didn't deserve to be called that.
That whole thing was some strange way to get them to talk, but instead of bringing him somewhere private, or even sitting like a normal person on a table, he was quick to sound boastful, and almost forced Jay into a very public interview. Cliff knew he was his son, so why not talk to him in any other way? A letter, invite him to lunch to catch up?
Jay didn't know if he wanted those things, really, there was no other way to put it, but things might have been easier if things went the same way as the alternate timeline.
"Yeah…" he mumbled, then dug his face into his knees, his hands trailed through his hair. Cole kneeled on the ground, then did Nya, and the four were in a circle.
"You wanna head home?" Cole put a hand on his shoulder and pointed outside.
He ignored that, and looked to Kai, "My biological dad." he anuncciated the word, bopping his head to each syllable.
Kai nodded and put his arms up in defence, he crossed his legs and knelt a little more forward, "Right, well, he seemed a bit pushy." Jay just listened, he didn't know what to say. Was he pushy, or is it okay, he is technically his Father, after all, he just wants to reconnect, make up for abandoning him—
"Jay?" Cole joined, and scooted closer to him, his arm now fully wrapped around him, he wracked his head up, "We don't have to stay, if you wanna go, we'll come with."
"Yeah, this after-party isn't that interesting anyway. I'll steal some food from the buffet and we'll go back to the Monastery." Kai chuckled and started to stand, but Jay didn't return it. He sunk deeper into his knees and sighed. "Or we can stay here." he sat back down and looked around at the desolate hallways.
Jay gripped his pants like he did the table-cloth, trying to latch onto something, just not like how Cliff Gordon latched onto him, acting like they weren't in each-other's history.
He wondered how long he was a part of his life, which of his parents abandoned him, or if they both did it. Was it one of their ideas to just leave him on the front-door of an isolated junkyard. He couldn't imagine it being his idea alone, if he did, why would he be so obsessed with him, as shown by that room in his villa, and why would he want to talk to him now?
So…maybe it was his mother?
As told by Wu, his birth Mother was the elemental master of Lightning, and he noticed how he looked around like he reminisced about her. He was told she acted a lot like him, and looked a lot like her too.
But he never pressed any further on the subject, he had tried leaving the room as quickly as possible when Wu started talking about her charm, the personality she brought into the room. It felt too real, too much like him, he didn't want to act so much like a stranger, when his personality should be influenced by the people that actually raised him, not a stranger who was never part of his life.
He looked up, sweat clung to his face, "He…I think he wants to get to know me."
Nya nodded and took his hand from the tight grip on his pants.
"I don't know if I want to get to know him, he might have known me, for what, a few months while I was in diapers? But- but nothing else." he panted, "I never knew him, though. I don't care for him, I don't have a connection." he worked through his thoughts.
Cole came closer, "You don't have to do anything you don't want to."
Jay sighed and leaned away on instinct, but huddled closer again. Cole was great at physical comfort, or prying the truth out of his friends when they don't want to talk, but for their ridiculously stupid reasons; he always knew what was best for the team.
"But I also want to know about my birth parents, at least why they abandoned me."
He'd never mentioned his mother to them, as if there was much to say anyway. "You haven't told us much about your birth Mother, do you know anything about her?" Kai suggested, trying to think of an alternative to the boastful, famous man.
Jay whipped his head back and looked to the ceiling, groaning, he ran his hands over his face, "Ugh, I don't know anything about her… like if she's even alive."
"She was who you inherited your powers from." Nya stated, she grabbed his hand again, he kept accidently pulling away from her. "Maybe Wu knows something." she finished.
"He has no idea if she's alive or not either."
Squeezing her hand again, he sighed, then used the other hand to lean his chin on as he leaned into his knees. He felt so small in the hallway, infinite lights, then the party music still loud down the hall, but very muffled, he would hear if someone opened the door, and no matter if he knew who it was yet, he would definitely be running away.
He didn't want to have to deal with… any of this, he had parents, loving parents, and this adopted thing, Cliff Gordon still being alive, all forced him to deal with it.
Oh. Tears were falling, he wiped them before knowing they were there, thinking the feeling was just an itch.
"Jay…" she whispered.
Nya pulled him in immediately, just as Cole did, and it turned into a second of tug of war with his body until they both flopped into the middle. Kai didn't join in, but spoke instead, "You could send letters, that way you don't have to speak face to face." he suggested, "Build up to it, y'know? It took me and Nya a while to get used to our parents again, we're still getting used to it, really."
Jay peaked out of the hug, and the two were loosening a little. Cole was great at hugs, he knew just the right moment to swoop in, just what type he needed - whether that was a tight one, a hand over the shoulder, or for just a second, it all helped him in ways he couldn't express.
"Yeah, you know how it is with parents." Cole added, and Jay chuckled, he hugged tighter into him while Nya drifted away,
"I know how it is." he confirmed, then pulled away from him now, looking into im for a moment. "I- I think… I'm fine with never knowing, I just want to know whether he wants to get to know me or not, no matter what I want to do."
"Then we write a letter." Nya piped, then sent him a grin.
Kai nodded, "Yep, tomorrow - we'll help you, if you want."
He let himself feel a tear for a second, then wiped it away and smiled, "Thanks guys."