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The booming thunder shook the cleaner building as the storm raged on. Thankfully everyone had been done with their missions for the day and had been given the opportunity to relax. The rain continued on as Follo continued to write a report about a previous mission. His eyes scanned Tomme’s notes over the trash beasts they’d encountered as he continued to add his own input. The quiet music split through the silence of the small room as he flipped the page to begin again. The rain tapped against the windows providing its own input, soothing Follo. The music and pitter patter intertwined along with the wind whistling past the window. A second thunderclap echoed a bit closer as lightning followed soon after. It had startled him when it first began because of how loud the thunder would be. Follo hadn’t been familiar with the weather here, and yet he grew accustomed to it quite easily. It’s nothing like his hometown with the constant snow during all seasons, but nonetheless it was still nice. He’d have to write to his parents and let him know since his family was constantly writing to him about how he’s doing. He made a mental note to ask how his brothers and sisters were doing. He sighed contentedly deciding to take a small break before a knock came to his door. Stretching his arms, he shuffled towards the door opening it to find a familiar face.
Zanka. The boy wore his signature geta and a darker evening haori than the usual navy blue. It was black with matching bottoms, that had red embroidery at the edges. He held a white blanket at his side while wearing a tired look on his face. Follo smiled at the sight of his boyfriend, “Hey! What’s up?”
“Not much, mind if I stay the night?” Zanka asked to which Follo shook his head. “Thanks.” The other beelined for Follo’s bed as he set down his own fluffy blanket. The curly haired boy sat at his desk once more to finish the report. “Whatcha doing?” He ask walking over to the desk.
“Just finishing these mission files,” The light scratching of the pen stood out in the quiet room, “speaking of what’s the occasion?” Follo added.
Zanka rubbed his neck, “Just.. wanted to see you.” Follo blushed at the thought of his boyfriend wanting to see him. (okay bro.) Zanka. His boyfriend. His boyfriend. The thought of it made him want to giggle uncontrollably. “Ya almost done?” Follo hurriedly scribbled down the last details.
The older announced, “Now I am!” Zanka took him by the hand, tugging the two over to the bed. “Cuddling? How forward.” Follo teased, Zanka groaned.
“Shaddup.” Zanka shifted beneath the covers to make space for his lover. Holding them up, Follo slipped under as well sighing happily. Immediately the younger teen slipped his arms above Follo’s shoulders and settled into the other’s neck. His hold on Follo was tight, as if he’d slip out of the boy’s grasp had he not held on. The older reciprocated holding him and sighing deeply. The calm lasted a measly few minutes before the storm decided to strike a bit too close to the HQ. A loud clap was heard and Zanka let out an undignified yelp of fear. Flinching from the noise and bumping his head into Follo’s chin. Follo tried to keep himself steady but he ended up falling onto the floor instead. Zanka immediately backed towards the wall his breath getting the best of him, revealing his hidden anxiety.
Follo rubbed his definitely bruised chin, “Ow..”
Zanka peered over the edge trying to make himself presentable, as he felt tears prick his water line. Damn it. He thought he was better than this. Trying to calm himself, he asked Follo. “Sorry. Are ya okay?”
“Been better..” Follo replied. “Are you okay though?” Zanka pressed his lips into a fine line.
“Yeah. I’m fine.”
“Zanka. That’s the worst lie I’ve ever heard.” Follo deadpanned.
“It ain’t a lie.”
“You sure?”
“Yeah.”
“Positive?”
“Yes.”
“…HIV positive? Ow!” Zanka hit him with the pillow in irritation.
“Stop asking me these dumb ass questions.”
“Actually, there are no dumb questions.” Follo retorted holding up a mocking finger.
“And you said I’m a terrible liar.” Zanka placed the pillow back down in its rightful place.
“You’re still hiding something. Aren’t you?” The blonde clutched the pillow. “Zanka. Why are you here.”
“I wanted to tell you something.” Oh no. Follo’s heart dropped at that statement. His stomach churned at the thought of what he would say afterwards. Was he not good enough? Was Zanka breaking up with him because he found someone better? His thoughts raced before he breathed in and out. The older teen tried to keep a cool head. “I don’t like.. storms. ‘Specially when they’re all loud and the noises and wind bangs against the window its just..” Oh. Well never mind! The curly haired boy let out an internal sigh of relief.
“Can I ask why?” Follo rested his arms on the bed before laying his head down.
Zanka paused, biting the inside of his lip. He ran his hand over his arm in an attempt to soothe himself. “The thunder reminds me of gunshots.”
Follo tilted his head before a chuckle escaped him, “What? Did someone shoot at you or something?” Zanka noticeably tensed at what was supposed to be a light joke. The other’s smile dropped immediately revealing an expression shrouded in disbelief, his brows furrowed in shock. “When?”
“Doesn’t matter, I’m fine now.” The younger teen tried to disguise his wavering voice but to no avail.
“Clearly not if you’re still flinching at the sound of lightning and thunder.” Follo noted. Zanka kissed his teeth as he looked away apprehensively. “Zanka.” The younger teen refused to respond to the older. “Please.” He looked down to the older boy holding one of his hands. When Follo pleaded with him he felt himself melt away. Those puppy dog eyes of his punched holes into Zanka’s heart drew him in. He swore those ochre colored eyes would kill him somehow. Especially with how convincing they made the other. Then all of a sudden he felt a wave of guilt wash over him. How could he not tell him?
“I was fourteen. It was supposed to be for training. But I was too slow. It got me right below my collarbone.” Zanka shifted his haori to show Follo the scar. Follo gaped at the circular wound before looking to Zanka for his permission to feel it. The older teen climbed onto the bed once more as he shifted toward his lover. Slowly he felt the scar, caressing it. It was caved in and was a clear divot as to where the person was aiming. He could feel the marred skin and how it tightened to heal itself. Thankfully, Zanka had been able to dodge. But what if he hadn’t been able to? The scar was just below his right collar bone, above his heart. Then the notion hit Follo. Whoever shot at him had been aiming for the kill. But why? And who would do something like this? He’d only been fourteen and people were doing this to him? Zanka covered the scar while fixing his haori, “Ain’t so bad when ya get used ta it, but ‘s still a bit scary. Hope yer not squeamish.” Zanka rubbed his neck.
”Does it make you uncomfortable? Or scared?” Zanka looked at Follo before debating with himself. “Zanka. Whoever was ‘training’ you like that, shouldn’t have. I honestly don’t have words for it.”
Zanka shrugged. “‘S fine, I—“ Then more thunder sounded causing him to clutch onto Follo like a lifeline, shoulders hunched in on themselves, as if he was bracing for impact. Catching his own shuddering breath, the blonde let go of Follo, “..sorry. I didn’t mean..to..” The younger teen inhaled, pulling together the last of his dignity. “Hold on to you like that.” He cleared his throat.
He was ashamed of himself. The idea didn’t make Follo pity the other though, it made him realize something about Zanka. He was prideful. Along with his egotistical and inferior feelings, the three caused a weapon of genuine self destruction. Building yourself up, being proud of yourself, only for something to happen and you decide to do away with everything. That’s how Zanka was. And those attributes still shone through at times but he kept them at bay. The teen was hard to figure out especially with how much he hid, but Follo simply shook his head, “It’s not your fault.”
Follo looked at Zanka. He wondered what went on in that head of his to make him act fine. Follo knows he would’ve been fuming if someone he knew hurt him like that. No. Not hurt. Kill. “It never will be. Follo held the blonde’s hands in his own before continuing, “You were fourteen.” He emphasized hoping the notion would hammer into Zanka and make him realize just how fucked up it was. “You know that my door is always open, right?”
Zanka looked at Follo, his droopy eyes contemplating what the other just said, “Always?” He asked, tears rimming his waterline.
“Always.”
“For anybody?” Zanka questioned.
Follo raised an eyebrow, “No?”
Zanka sighed in relief, “Good. I thought I’d walk in one day and spot Rudo.”
Follo winced at the thought of the angry teen, “No, no, no.. But you,” Follo shifted and leaned in as Zanka leaned away, his back connecting with the mattress. “get special boyfriend privileges.” The other smirked, fully on top of the blushing boy now.
Zanka pouted, “..shuddup.” Follo laughed before hoisting the other into his arms. Zanka groaned as he wrapped his arms around the other’s waist. “Just warnin’ you, I’ll probably be flinchin’ all night.”
“Fine with me.” Follo smiled while pressing a kiss into his lover’s hair. The two buried themselves under the covers, the storm becoming ambient noise as Zanka drifted to sleep peacefully. Follo opened a drowsy eye to behold his lover. He looked adorable. A fond sigh made its way out of Follo as he held what he cherished a little tighter.