Chapter Text
Alpha Centauri
Jemison
New Atlantis
UC Veterans Memorial Cemetery
July 18, 2331
10:04AM
CRACK!
I didn't blink as all seven rifles fired in unison, the sound barely more than a muted blare. I couldn't take my eyes off Sarah's portrait.
"Ready. Aim. Fire."
CRACK!
I felt nothing. I let nothing in to feel.
I couldn't. Not here. Not now. Her eyes...
"Ready."
I...
"Aim."
Cannot..
"Fire."
Feel.
CRACK!
"Honor guard. Shoulder arms!"
Hold it together, Elise. Not until I get home. Home...
Cora gently squeezed my hand, earning her a half-hearted flicker of a smile that only skimmed the surface as I watched the seven-man rifle team turn and march away. Sam watched me from over his daughter's head. To my left, Juliette, Anna, and Lily sat silently, but I could feel their eyes on the fragile thing that I had become, both physically and emotionally. It would be over soon, then I could finally let it all...
I sobbed.
NO.
The bugler stood and took his place beside Sarah, drawing a deep breath before the first mournful notes of Taps filled the air.
NO!
I closed my eyes, knowing that not seeing any of this didn't make a goddamned difference, but I didn't close them fast enough.
A flash of red caught my eye. I tracked its flitting path until it lighted on Sarah's casket. The bright red cardinal turned its head, looking from side to side as if it was trying to find something. Unsatisfied, the little bird tapped its beak against the polished walnut, then looked at me with a single chirp.
No...
The first tear fell, followed by the entire deluge, as everything I tried so hard to bury deep within welled up as a long wailing moan.
...no.
I pushed myself from my seat, lurching forward and unable to stop myself until a sharp pain in my belly forced me back to my knees a step later. I pulled away from the caring hands that reached out for me and pushed through the pain anyway, crawling to Sarah's casket to desperately drape myself around it as if I could make Sarah wake up and tell me that everything was okay.
Say it's 'kay, Sarah! Please! Just say it's...
Nothing made sense anymore. Not this. Not Sarah... Just gone. Not the words that were spilling from my mouth like tears. Not my anguished screams or the eyes that watched me with pity. Nothing. All I had wanted to do was to live a normal life with her. Now, all I wanted was to die with her.
To be where she was.
Like we promised.
Where you go... Take me with you, Sarah.