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Lately, Hanjin had been seeing a familiar face almost everywhere around the campus. Seeing faces was not out of the ordinary, especially at a big campus, but when one face in particular kept bumping into Hanjin in the hallways; among crowds at the cafeteria; between shelves in the library; he couldn’t help but get curious about them.
The boy always had a casual aura surrounding him as he walked past Hanjin, laughing along with his friends. Sometimes, he'd make brief eye contact with Hanjin whilst his footsteps clicked against the asphalt.
Without realizing it, Hanjin let his gaze on the boy linger longer than necessary every time he passed by him.
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Hanjin was rushing to the elevator—he was late for a hangout with his friends.
“Wait! Don’t close the door! Please!” a male voice echoed and Hanjin frantically pressed the open button before the elevator doors fully closed.
Then, a familiar figure entered, panting as he thanked Hanjin. Hanjin’s eyes sparked with recognition. The boy standing in front of him was none other than the boy Hanjin was curious about— the one his eyes kept catching constantly without him even realizing it. As awkward tension settled between the two of them, Hanjin couldn’t help but steal a few glances at the boy.
A subtle lavender scent drifted from him, filling the elevator with the smell. As he was distracted by his phone, Hanjin’s gaze dropped onto the cup in the boy’s hand. It was brown, with a bright yellow pipe stuck in the middle of it as tiny water droplets trickled down the plastic down to the boy’s wrist and Hanjin wondered if it was ashotchu or lemon tea.
The elevator jerked to a stop, but the doors didn't open. Hanjin hummed in confusion. "Why aren't the doors opening?" He asked, panic slipping into his voice.
“I’m guessing the elevator broke. We should wait until help arrives," the boy calmly suggested. Hanjin nodded in agreement, uncomfortably shifting to the awkward silence. “May I know your name?” the boy finally broke the tension with his sunny smile.
“Hanjin. Park Hanjin. I’m 19 years old. Fine arts major.”
He echoed Hanjin in a low, tender whisper. “I’m Kim Dohoon. 20. Theatre and film making major. Nice to meet you," the hand he offered to Hanjin was slender, with knuckles so neat and fingers so long. Hanjin grinned.
Dohoon…So that’s his name.
“Nice to meet you too, Dohoon-ssi," he shook his hand.
They started talking more. About teachers, dorm dramas, secret rooms around the campus—just anything to keep the conversation going. What once was an elevator filled with awkward silence started to slowly melt into newly-found friendship that none of them had expected.
Finally, after what felt like a whole day, the elevator doors opened whilst they were laughing about a recent rumor. They quickly got off, letting the repair workers replace the space they had just been in.
"Hanjin-ssi," Dohoon called. "May I have your number?" He reached his phone out to the boy.
Hanjin grinned. "Sure."
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Rain cascaded down steadily, making umbrellas bloom like black flowers by the sidewalk. Hanjin walked along with the parade of strangers, wearing his own umbrella over his head. As he turned a corner, he instantly froze as a familiar boy appeared in front of his eyes.
Dohoon was crouched in front of a cardboard box, holding a black umbrella over the box and him as soft meows were heard from the box. Hanjin looked closer and realized that there was a small, gray kitten with fluffy fur and shiny, black eyes. He watched as Dohoon gently patted the kitten’s head, his expression full of admiration for the animal. “You’re so cute!”, he quietly exclaimed, as if he was trying not to attract attention from the strangers walking past. “Sorry but I can’t take you home, buddy. Take care!” The kitten meowed, like it didn’t want him to go. Hanjin’s heart warmed up at the scene.
Suddenly, they locked eyes and Dohoon instantly froze. “How long have you been standing there?” he asked, his voice calmer than he looked. “Long enough,” Hanjin crouched down beside him. “Let’s go, hyung. I don’t want you to get a cold.” He caressed the kitten’s soft fur, smiling tenderly as the animal meowed.
Hanjin didn’t notice Dohoon staring at him, his eyes flickering with something unreadable—almost like admiration.
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“What book are you looking for?”
Hanjin was crouching by the shelf in the fantasy section that evening when a voice, slightly teasing and curious, approached him with that familiar shadow. Dohoon bent over, leaning in closer to Hanjin. His usual lavender fragrance instantly hit Hanjin and with how close they were, it made him slightly dizzy. “The Bird That Drinks Tears.”
Dohoon looked around and pulled out a book from one of the dusty top shelves, wiping off the dust on the book cover. “Here.” Hanjin muttered a small ‘thank you’ before taking the book, heart hammering against his chest.
“Can we share a table?” Dohoon softly asked.
Hanjin nodded. “Sure!”
They sat across from each other, too focused on their books and Hanjin stole some brief glances at Dohoon. They didn’t realize how much time had passed until Hanjin noticed the pitch black sky from the window.
“Hyung, it’s getting really dark. We should go back to our dorms," he suggested.
Dohoon hummed, then smirked as his eyes sparkled. “Let’s go for a walk, Hanjin-ah!”
“A walk?” Hanjin echoed. “Hyung, are you sure we can?” His concern faded as soon as Dohoon nodded.
He pulled Hanjin by the wrist, dragging him out of the library and into the bright city lights of Seoul. They walked to a nearby park, sitting on a bench with a breathtaking view of the city. Dohoon chomped on the ice cream he had bought earlier at a convenience store, slowly chewing as he gazed at the view of the neon lights before him, completely oblivious to the fact that Hanjin was staring at him with admiration stirring behind his eyes. The curve of Dohoon’s jaw, the bridge of his nose were illuminated by the bright, neon city lights and Hanjin let out a silent exhale out of awe at how…beautiful Dohoon looked.
Suddenly, the cool night air softly blew and Hanjin couldn’t help but shiver. “Want my jacket?” Dohoon offered.
“It’s alright.”
Even though Hanjin stated that he was okay, Dohoon still draped his thick, warm puffer jacket over his shoulders, instantly soothing his cold back. “Thank you so much, hyung,” he smiled, cheeks getting warm again. Dohoon only observed Hanjin thoroughly with thick tenderness behind those alluring dark pupils. It was then that Hanjin realized how weirdly good it felt to be looked at so lovingly—a mix of strange comfort laid on his chest as he stared back at Dohoon, mirroring the same look onto his face.
“Hanjinnie.”, Dohoon smirked.
“Want to come sleep in my dorm?”
Hanjin blinked. “What?”
“My roommate’s on vacation so he’s gone for a while and It’s so lonely and boring just being by myself in the dorm,” he pouted. “Please?”
Seeing Dohoon’s adorable pout, Hanjin couldn’t help but agree. He beamed as Dohoon cheered.
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Dohoon’s dorm had a lavender fragrance—his usual perfume. There were two beds, both near the wall. A messy blanket laid on top of the bed on the right with a light green duvet and several plushies and pillows scattered on it. The one on the left was a huge contrast to the other one; it was neat, with no pillows, just a simple, soft pink bedspread. Dohoon jumped on the right one, sighing heavily. “Make yourself at home, Hanjinnie.” Hanjin politely sat on the empty bed, pondering on what to do next. Dohoon noticed, smiling. “Hanjin-ah," he called. “If you’re sleepy, you can sleep there.” He nodded towards the bed Hanjin was seated on.
Hanjin blinked. “No, hyung. It’d be rude of me to use your roommate's bed without his permission.”
“You want to sleep with me instead?” Dohoon smirked. Awkward tension fell over them as Hanjin’s cheeks turned bright red. “That’s not what I meant, hyung!”
“I’ll just sleep here,” Hanjin laid down on the empty bed, curling up like a small cat. Suddenly, a warm, thick blanket landed on him. When he looked up, Dohoon was standing over him with a soft, loving smile neatly curved on his lips. “Sleep well, Hanjin-ah.” Hanjin reflected Dohoon’s warm expression, slowly closing his eyes as exhaustion won and he drifted into a deep sleep.
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He suddenly woke up to a warm body pressed against his. Dohoon had his arm wrapped around Hanjin’s slim waist, his chest rising and lowering steadily as his warm breath fell on Hanjin’s collarbones. Warmth crept up his throat as he was suddenly aware of how overwhelmingly close Dohoon was, his jaw tightening as the warmth spread across his cheeks. He swallowed the heat, trying to slow down the fast pace of his pulse. Dohoon shifted in his bed, leaning in closer to Hanjin as his breath made him slightly ticklish. “Hanjinnie…Warm…,” Dohoon muttered—he was sleep-talking, Hanjin supposed. A smile with a mix of admiration and surprise appeared on Hanjin’s face as he gently set his arm on Dohoon’s shoulder, setting himself in a hugging position. Their breaths synchronized as Hanjin was slightly shocked by his own actions. Soon, as his eyelids grew heavier and drowsiness fell upon him, he slept peacefully with Dohoon in his warm embrace.
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Hanjin entered the garden to hang out with Dohoon, but he was no where to be found. Maybe he isn’t here? He searched the gymnasium, the library and even the back of the stairs where nobody visited. “Youngjae-hyung," he called when he noticed a familiar brown-haired boy near the science building. The boy’s eyes lifted up. “Have you seen Dohoon-hyung?”
Hanjin quirked an eyebrow when Youngjae shook his head. “He’s sick, Hanjin-ah. He’s in his dorm, resting, because he got a fever yesterday.”
“Really?” Hanjin gasped. “I’ll go check up on him, hyung. See you later!” He waved as he jogged to the dormitory with concern.
The dorm was quiet - a dangerous echo that settled as soon as Hanjin entered with the slightest shift of the door. He found Dohoon sleeping, curled up under a warm blanket. He looked so…serene, with long eyelashes that casted faint shadows on his eye bags, his once neat bangs now messy and flattened by the fluffy pillow. The mattress was spongy as Hanjin carefully sat next to the sleeping boy, trying not to wake him up. He slowly reached out his hand and gently pressed it onto Dohoon’s forehead—it was sweaty and hot. His expression immediately shifted into worry.
Suddenly, Dohoon’s eyes gently opened, startling Hanjin. “Hanjinnie?” His voice was low, grainy and tired. “What are you doing here?” He sat up on the cushion, the blanket resting on his knees.
“I heard you’re sick, hyung. How’re you feeling?”
Dohoon smiled weakly. “It’s just a fever, Hanjinnie. You worry too much.”
“Alright. Whatever,” Hanjin chuckled. “What matters is for you to get better soon.”
“Aw~," Dohoon cooed. “You’re such an angel, Hanjinnie.”
Hanjin’s cheeks warmed up at the sudden compliment. “Thanks, hyung," his voice was barely a whisper. He stared into Dohoon’s drowsy eyes, their shoulders leaning on each other. Dohoon reached his hand out to caress Hanjin’s cheek, gently tracing over the delicate, soft skin with his thumb. He leaned in close enough that Hanjin could feel his warm breath.
Then, Dohoon’s lips landed on his cheek, giving it a soft kiss before his weight shifted down to lay over Hanjin’s shoulder.
Hanjin caught him before he hit the bed, warmth creeping up his throat as he froze in disbelief. The room was quiet again, only the faint snores of Dohoon could be heard. Hajin softly put his fingers over his cheek, tracing over it like he was trying to make sure that the kiss was real.
He laid Dohoon down on the soft cushion, putting a blanket over him. Then, he carefully laid down on the bed himself next to Dohoon. Suddenly, Dohoon shifted in his position, turned around and wrapped his arms around Hanjin’s neck, pulling him closer to his chest. Hanjin could feel his steady heartbeat and in Dohoon’s warm clasp, he fell asleep.
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Hanjin sat under a large oak tree by the campus garden, laughing with his friends—Shinyu, Youngjae, Jihoon, Kyungmin, and of course, Kim Dohoon. His smile faltered as he saw Dohoon beaming so happily, as if nothing happened the night before. “Guys! Summer break is near, you know?” Shinyu reminded.
“Let’s go on a trip together! Just the six of us?” Kyungmin exclaimed. He clapped cheerfully as everyone started agreeing. “Sure. I’ll come, Kyungmin-ah," Hanjin beamed.
Before they knew it, summer break arrived in a blink of an eye. They boarded the airplane, buzzing with excitement. Coincidentally, Dohoon and Hanjin got seated right next to each other on the airplane. At one point, as they were in the middle of the way to Japan, Dohoon fell into a deep slumber and his head stumbled onto Hanjin's shoulder, comfortably tucking it in like it belonged there as Hanjin's cheeks flushed with a tint of bright red.
Fukuoka was bright, with the ocean glistening under the warm sunlight, the busy streets of strangers buzzing with conversation, and the pastel blue sky that held fluffy, white clouds. Nighttime came in faster than they expected and the six of them laid on the bed, tired from collecting seashells, eating ice cream from the convenience store and splashing each other with salty seawater from the beach all day. “This is the best!” Jihoon chuckled. “I love this vacation so much!”
“We’re all on the same page, Jihoon-ah," Youngjae chimed in as he gently stroked Shinyu’s hair, who was laying on his lap. “Hyungs! Get a room!” Kyungmin covered his eyes jokingly as everyone else chuckled around him.
“Hanjinnie," Dohoon whispered into Hanjin’s ears amongst the laughter. “Meet me at the beach tonight when everybody else is sleeping. Don’t bring company.” He shuffled out of the room, mumbling about buying snacks for everyone and leaving Hanjin flustered.
Hanjin snapped himself into reality, laughing along with the maknaes at Youngjae and Shinyu, who were being so lovey-dovey with each other.
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Hanjin laid awake in the soft mattress and after making sure everybody was asleep, he got up to meet Dohoon. As expected, Dohoon’s bed was empty, his blanket left messy and thrown all over his bed.
The chilly night air whistled through the city, making Hanjin shiver in his place although a warm, thick jacket was wrapped around him. Then, he saw him. Dohoon was sitting on the sand, sipping a can of soda as he observed the calm waves. Hanjin sat beside him, slightly reluctant. “What did you want to tell me?”, he cautiously asked. Dohoon handed him a can with a small grin and Hanjin took the cold can. Dohoon adjusted his cap, sighing heavily.
“Hanjin-ah.”
Hanjin hummed in response.
Dohoon sighed again - longer this time, like he was letting the weight off his shoulders. “The first time you passed me in the hallways, I didn’t really think about it. But when it kept happening again and again, I...started to observe you more than I intended to.”
Hanjin felt recognition inside his chest. So he also noticed me.
“I…” Dohoon swallowed the nervousness building up his throat. “I like you, Park Hanjin. I realized it a while ago but I think always had liked you.”
“And…I’m not sure whether you feel the same way, but I just wanted to let it all out today," he added
Hanjin’s expression remained frozen as he tried to make sense of what he just heard. For a while, silence took over them. Then, a subtle smile curved on Hanjin’s lips. “Hyung.”
Dohoon turned to look at him, hope flickering in his pupils. “I…” he sighed. “I like you too. Maybe more than I think, but I really, really like you, hyung.”
Dohoon’s eyes sparked instantly as a wide grin appeared on his face. “Really?” Hanjin nodded. “Oh my god, Hanjinnie. I love you so much!” He wrapped his arms around Hanjin's waist with such captivating eyes. A mischievous smirk tugged at his lips and he leaned in, pressing their lips together.
Hanjin was shaken at first, but melted into their kiss. After letting their lips dance and tangle with each other, they pulled back, pressing their foreheads together as both of their cheeks were faintly tinted with red under the blue moonlight. "So," Dohoon started. "we're a thing now?" Hanjin nodded shyly, his face turning even redder at the sight of Dohoon giggling and beaming like an elementary school kid when they get candy. He caressed Dohoon's cheeks, tracing his thumb over his lips as if he was debating whether the kiss was real or not. He quickly pressed his lips against Dohoon's again but it was quicker, more rushed this time. "Let's go back before the others wake up, hyung." Dohoon nodded, leading the way.
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They returned to the hotel room, their fingers intertwined together, refusing to separate. As they entered the room with a slow shift of the door, cheers and whistles erupted and Shinyu, Youngjae, Jihoon and Kyungmin all wore bright beams on their faces. "Congratulations, you guys!" Shinyu exclaimed amidst the loud cheers.
"What is this, hyung?" Hanjin whispered to Dohoon.
Dohoon awkwardly rubbed the back of his neck, slightly chuckling out of nervousness. "I kinda planned it. The confession. I told them in advance."
Hanjin giggled, the same cute little giggle that he does when he's flustered. "So, everyone knew before I did."
Dohoon clutched his hand tighter as if reassuring that he won't ever let go.
And Hanjin was sure of it.