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A squeak filled up the empty, majestic church. Asta lifted his chin, looking at the ceiling. It was far, very far from where he was. Stained glass decorated the huge windows, each of them facing the other. A cool scent caught in his nose. It was refreshing. He let go of the doorknob when he realized he was still holding it. The door slammed shut.
His footsteps were the only thing that could be heard. Why am I even here? I should have just gone to the regular church in my town, and not to this fancy, old-fashioned one. He wondered.
Asta wanted to confess his sins. They were driving him crazy. A couple of months ago he started dreaming about a woman, a very beautiful one. In those dreams he would want to approach her, but something stopped him every time. It felt wrong, sinful. He didn’t know why. However, he’d wake up before he could talk to the mysterious woman.
Thus, he came here. As he had thought, he could have gone to the village church, but he had heard some rumors about this antique church. Supposedly, everyone who went there was forgiven, no matter what sins they had committed. He also heard that no one had ever seen the priestess in charge of the church. Some said she was a fraud, while others claimed she was an angel.
Asta didn’t care who the priestess was. He just wanted to clear his head and find out if he was sinning.
"Is someone there?" he said. Despite the vastness of the church, the echo allowed the priestess to hear him wherever she was.
There was a brief moment of silence during which Asta thought the speculation about this being a fraud might be true. Still, this thought did not last long.
"Did you come here to confess your sins?" a soft, feminine voice asked. She stood still at the end of the church. Only half of her body was visible; the other half was hidden by a curtain. She wore a long white dress that dragged along the floor. Her silver hair covered most of her face, but her large, drooping pink eyes were visible. Her gaze was perplexing.
Asta was startled by her appearance. It was almost eerie. Yet somehow it felt familiar.
"More or less, I want to know if my actions are sinful. If they are, then yes, I’ve come to confess,” he said, getting closer to the woman.
Suddenly, she lifted her hand, stopping Asta from approaching her.
“Do not get closer. This distance should be fine” she demanded.
“I… understand. However, should it be fine for what?” Asta came to a halt. He was puzzled by the actions of the priestess.
"That matter is none of your business. You came here to confess your sins. You can start whenever you're ready. I will listen until the very end. I will not stop you. After you finish, I will speak. When I speak, make sure you do not interrupt. I will respect your turn; you will respect mine. All right?” she explained, setting the record straight.
Asta swallowed hard before answering. “Yes, understood,” he breathed heavily. It was time to know if he would get forgiven.
He hesitated a bit before he finally started speaking. "I've been dreaming a lot the last few months. At first, it may seem normal; everyone dreams. However, I think my dreams are odd. A young woman appears in every single dream I’ve had in the past few months. She is gorgeous. The most beautiful woman I have ever seen in my life. No matter how hard I try, I can't talk to her. I don't know why, but it's as if I'm not allowed to communicate with her or touch her. Dream after dream is always the same. Nonetheless, I believe I’m starting to develop romantic feelings for her: I love her silk-like hair, her almond eyes, and her porcelain skin. I love everything about her. Nevertheless, I don't even know if she's a real person or just a figment of my imagination. I can't speak to her, and loving someone this way just feels wrong. I'm not sure how much longer I'll have these dreams, and that’s my biggest concern. One day, I’ll have to marry someone, love someone, and care for someone. How can I do all that while still daydreaming about a woman I don’t know? Who emerges every time I go to sleep? I’d feel like I’m cheating. Tell me, are my dreams a sin? I want to stop them. I love that woman, but I can't stand this situation anymore.”
A long, almost awkward silence fell upon the large room. The woman stared at him for what seemed like hours. Not much later, Asta noticed how she raised her eyebrows, as if she had just realised something.
“You have not committed a sin.” she stated, in a serious tone.
The man was surprised by how assertive she sounded. “How are you so sure? If I may ask”
“To love is not a sin. Moreover, it’s just a dream; it will never come true. Even if your dreams continue to occur and you get married, it will not be considered a sin,” she declared.
“I… know my dreams will almost surely never come true. We don’t live in a fairy tale. However, why can’t I reach her in my dreams? I just want to have a chat with her, to get to know her.” he asked, still uncertain.
The priestess let out a breath before speaking again. “That is because you were never meant to meet her. Your dreams are a consequence, nothing more, nothing less.”
"A...consequence?"
"You could say that. Or you could say it's my fault," she revealed, leaving the man speechless.
“I’m not human.”
Asta could not believe what he had just heard. “What? Your fault? Are you saying…”
"I am the woman who appears in your dreams," she said, raising her gaze to meet the man's.
He was astonished, he did not expect this situation. “Wow… I was… not anticipating that. But, what do you mean you are not human?”
“I…” she thought carefully about what she was going to say. “I fell. I was cast out of Heaven. I am what humans say a fallen angel” Then, she moved, leaving the hidden half of her body in plain sight. A broken wing protruded from her back. It was clear that she was unable to fly. Now, he understood why she hid here. No one came to this old church, unless someone wanted to confess, like him.
"Why...?" Why were you banished from Heaven?” he wondered, showing concern for her.
She looked away from him. "Angels have positions. In my case, I was a guardian angel. To be more exact, I was your guardian angel. I was too foolish and let myself get too close to you. Eventually, I fell in love. With a human—none other than you," the fallen angel said, glancing at him. "In Heaven, angels cannot fall in love with humans. It's forbidden. If they do, they get expelled, just like me. As a punishment, I must wander this world until the laws of Heaven change or you die. I can’t let humans get too close to me; that would only increase the time I spend on Earth,” she explained.
Asta was still processing everything he had heard. She was his guardian angel, the one looking after him. He found it, the girl of his dreams, literally. Nevertheless, There was one thing that just didn't quite add up for him.
“But why do you keep appearing in my dreams?”
“It’s a whim.” she said, a little embarrassed. “In your dreams, I am conscious. I also can see you. The reason why I can’t talk to you in your dreams is because humans and angels are not meant to be close. I’m already close enough by being in your head, that’s plenty.”
He was, once again, dumbfounded. Thereupon, he realised something.
“Then I guess I’ll keep dreaming,” he said, showing a genuine grin. “I also love you. If that’s the only way we can ‘be together’, I don’t want to stop all this daydreaming.”
The one that was surprised this time was the fallen angel. She grinned thankfully.
“Oh, by the way, you haven’t told me your name yet.” Asta asked, curious.
She smiled softly. “I’m Noelle”
“I see, it suits you. Well, as you probably know, I’m Asta” he mentioned.
“Yeah… I know” she chuckled slightly.
Another silence filled up the room. Asta checked his watch.
“It’s getting late for me… Are you always here? In this church I mean?” he had to go, though he didn’t want to.
"I am not. I have to keep moving every once in a while. Otherwise, villagers would eventually find out that I am an angel, which could cause unnecessary trouble,” she said. Noelle was sad to see him leave, but after all, he had his own duties, and she had hers.
“I see…” he also felt a little bit sorrowful by that fact. “I gotta go now.” he tried to approach her again.
“Don’t, please.” and Noelle stopped him again. “Bye”
Asta knew she would not let him get closer, but at least he made an attempt.
“See you tonight?”
“See you tonight.” she assured.
Noelle was preparing to leave for another church, knowing she would never see that man again—at least not in person. However, she felt at peace, happy to have finally met him.
Asta headed home. However, he made one promise to himself. He would never love anyone other than Noelle. Even if their relationship could never be, he would stay loyal to her forever.