Chapter Text
THE VOID
Once again, I rest in the Void, it's not a bad place, it feels like I'm floating in water, not something like a pool, like I'm in a sensory deprivation tank. There's nothing here.
Nothing but a calm melody and the SAVE slots I've built up, the music helps the endless torture of living in this place. Where I can't experience anything, no smell, no taste, no touch, inside this PRISON. THIS SPECIAL HELL OF MINE.
Whenever I personally believe I've completed the day of adventures, I was sent here... So here I wait. While I wait, I recollect the past...
It's calming but frustrating, I don't know why I'm always sent here, it always increases in increments. Years ago when I first launched this game from Toby on Twitter, it was just a normal game, I played it to the end, and enjoyed it, so I wanted to try again, but this time once I launched that accursed PROGRAM, IT BROUGHT ME HERE, TO THE VOID. It was disorientating, but I actually kind of wanted it at first, if I was in "Deltarune" I could just do everything perfectly since I even beat that Jevil thing. Thankfully I still could see as I did in game whenever it came to combat, but when it came to normal life I was first person in Kris.
The First Day was amazing, actually SEEING the monsters that lived around town in first person was wonderful, Onion-San was absolutely horrifying though, there is a major difference between a sprite, and a giant $!$? off squid octopus thing with a smiley face slowly coming out of the ocean. King was actually a lot cuter than I thought, and Susie.... Susie was beautiful, I already liked her model just from looking at her, but those scales were wonderful along with those long claws, learning that she was the dragon felt appropriate, but still seeing it in first person was terrifying for the first time. If I had full control of Kris I'm sure I might have &&&&&&&& myself during her whole first encounter. Also I learned that the music of the game is diegetic, which is fun being able to just listen to the music just by being in a certain room.
Then the day was over.... once Kris pulled me out (surprisingly not very painful to me, it's just that they decides to use an iron grip on me) and pulled out the knife, it sent me here to the Void....
In the Void I was allowed only 3 choices. Sit in the Void, listening to this calm music. Select a new save and live through all of it again. Finally LOAD where I left off, however doing so just sends me about 3 minutes before being sent back to the Void, so the third is entirely pointless to me. So I wait hoping for the next day to be available...
I waited.
I waited for a day before I started to feel insane from the absolute LACK OF ANYTHING HERE, I mean, what the hell can a heart shaped object like me do??? So since I had nothing, I decided to start a second SAVE slot and decided to see what happens when I attacked everyone, surprisingly little changed, bake sale was still the same, Seam was the same, hell even Lancer was the same and the little guy was sent FLYING from Susie. Once that was over, it sent me right back to the Void.............
I'm goddamn trapped here.
I realized after the first week of being in the Void, I can't DO ANYTHING, THE STORY IS THE SAME, NOT EVEN TINY DIFFERENCES IF I DO SOME SHENANIGANS, I was trapped... For 4 $!$?#@$ YEARS, I COULD NOT, DO ANYTHING, FOR 4 ANGEL DAMNED YEARS. OH AND SPEAKING OF "ANGEL" AND $!$#@, TURNS OUT THIS WORLD CENSORS ALL MY $!#!$!% WORDS THAT IT DOESN'T LIKE. At least finding out what worked and what didn't was funny for a few days running through every single word I could think of. Toby Fox surprisingly was not censored despite him essentially being God both here, and in Undertale. Even Gaster wasn't censored even though I'm sure that it was him who brought me here...
Finally after 4 agonizingly long years, when doing another repeat while hoping something would change, I woke up the next day.
I finally woke up not hearing Toriel calling Kris to go to school! Instead it was her yelling at Kris for eating the pie she made for them. Ecstatically I made my way to the Dark World as soon as I could, I NEEDED STIMULATION AWAY FROM THE VOID. It was so good hearing new things from everyone, it was so good hearing new music! Then we hit the library and entered CYBER WORLD. CYBER WORLD was pretty cool right away, the whole tech look was sweet, but the best part was knowing what was in store, I got to learn that Berdly and Noelle were here, meaning NEW CHARACTERS, NEW INFORMATION, NEW EVERYTHING AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAAAAAAA!!! STIMULATIONS!!!!!!!
It was fun, exciting, learning more about Noelle, Kris, Ralsei, and Susie... Kris was always an interesting person to learn about, being an oddball prankster. Noelle their unfortunate and usually unwilling victim, she seemed to gradually develop a fun friendship between the two, but eventually they broke apart with time. After having gone through Cyber World HUNDREDS of times I eventually got some kind of relationship that I was satisfied with reconnecting them, but they weren't the only ones I could learn about. Ralsei was a complex character after having been through the first two days so many times I would eventually find that they know of me, they had to have considering their "Let us close our eyes and think of how Susie is doing" sending me away from Kris then come back afterwards and hearing the tail end of a conversation that the two were discussing.
They KNOW I am HERE.
TRAPPED.
YET THEY DON'T TALK TO ME DIRECTLY.
ALWAYS REFERRING TO ME AS KRIS. Sure I can understand why, can't talk about the parasitic SOUL trapped inside the body of a young kid in front of everyone and get them all freaked out.
However it is so DEHUMANIZING.
I AM HERE.
I
AM
NOT
KRIS.
I do not wish anything ill of the Prince of the Dark. It is just merely my unending frustration of being unable to do ANYTHING. I want to talk, I want to be friends, I want to try tea parties. I don't want to
wait.
However, I cannot.
It is not the Prince's fault. They truly wish the best of everyone, but it hurts. It hurts seeing them put themselves down at every opportunity, it hurts seeing them try to make themselves seem irrelevant.
I am the same mind of Susie: "You are real to me", I wanted them to know that, "I'm glad Ralsei is Ralsei"
Susie... she's the one who I feel deserves the world. I am a huge fan, I love everything she is, and is trying to be. Sure for the very first time on the first day she definitely scared me threatening to eat my face off, but as the story continued, as eventually after YEARS of waiting, after YEARS of repeating the first two days over and over and over and over and over. I enjoyed everything she is.
She was resolute, strong, and vocal, extremely so, but that made her admirable, she spoke her mind and that was wonderful. Unlike Kris who wouldn't let me say ANYTHING I could want, "I don't mind being your partner." "Sure I can do the project for you" "I [Kris] have a massive damn crush on you"
NONE OF IT, KRIS COME THE $!$? ON, WHY ARE YOU SO RESISTANT TO LET HER KNOW?! SHE CAN'T WORK IT OUT UNLESS YOU TELL HER YOU ANGEL DAMNED MORON.
None of it matters though, because every damn time I wanted to continue the story into the next day Kris stabbed the ground in order to create a dark fountain in the middle of their damn living room, leaving me in suspense, the moment I saw that damn TV smile. It sent me to the Void.... What could it mean, was Kris the one making the fountains? That doesn't seem possible, the one in the library only existed AFTER Noelle and Berdly were there! Are they working with someone else? Maybe they just wanted to make a fun adventure? They could have consulted me, I'd be down for making a dark fountain for a quick fun adventure even if it COULD potentially result in the Roaring, even if it did, I'd just LOAD.
Then it was the Void again... Repetition really sucks when done is absolutely large quantities you know? I've been stuck here for the last 200 20 5? 6 years, so I've been very repetitive, slowly putting everything together, making sure to take my time with everything because I don't have anything else to do hehe. Eventually I get all the information I possibly can from Queen, from Noelle, Susie,Kris,ralsei, so i
wait...
EVENTUALLY
I woke up in a dark world next to Susie, on top of the couch.
ESTATIC that I finally could continue this world full of new ventures with friends Me, Kris, Ralsei, and Susie moved forward, it was amazing, Tenna was a fun guy, I felt horribly bad for the man, how bad must your family divorce have to be in order to give your TV separation anxiety? There I learned of "The Forbidden Path"; never having thought of back tracking the moment I found Noelle in Cyber World... I regret it now, but at the time I indulged because repetition is a horrible thing, and this "Forbidden Path" is new, foreboding, tragic.
Once I lost to the Roaring Knight, I was pleasantly surprised that instead of sending me to the Void once it was over, I instead woke up in the morning to Susie eating, calling out Kris's name.
We went to church, I learned more about the people and learned that Kris can be a right $!$? when they want to be, sure I made them drink Alphys's mix right in front of her, but I sure didn't make them toss it at her feet like that...
Susie basically asked Noelle on a date, then I took Susie and Kris on a date while Noelle waited at her house (sorry Asriel, but if you didn't want that money taken, then take it with you to college). We then went to MikeTown again, but the odd part was us going to visit Ralsei's room, it was empty, nothing was there but a window. It was a depressing sight, even I would have put something in the Void if it was possible! Ralsei CHOOSES to be like this... After discussing how they NEED to have a normal room we left to go to Noelle's house to find a code.
At Noelle's house I learned a LOT about the 3 of them. Kris's prankster life, Susie's impression of them, Kris is a god at piano's, which makes sense why they always got upset whenever I tried but failed miserably at it.
I ALSO LEARNED KRIS IS A $!$?*!#$ GREAT SHOT AFTER THEY THREW AN ANGEL DAMNED BOTTLE AND HOCKEY PUCK AT ME, then later on when I was doing the ONE THING Susie wanted me to do. KRIS BEAT ME.
That stick, it hurt, it hurt a lot. The grain of that stick ETCHED ITSELF INTO ME.
They beat me.
Again, and again, and again, and again. I was determined, I WANTED THAT DAMNED CODE TO THE SHELTER.
They beat me againandagainandagainandagainandagain
a n d a g a i n .
I was lucky that Susie decided to open that closet, that was only when the beating stopped......
I wish I could have stayed and eventually get discovered by Susie and Noelle, but no matter how much time I sat under that Angel Doll in the living room, they never came back, time worked oddly, it seemed that unless it progressed the main story of "Deltarune" it didn't pass time...
Meaning I could sit there for DAYS, and nothing could happen, and I did...
H o p i n g....
When we found the dark world at the church, worried that Toriel was in there, I told Susie exactly that, we dove in, and some of the most beautiful music started playing.
(Such a holy place)
I've personally never been a big fan of church, but if they listened to hymms like this every Sunday then I may reconsider. However it was soon interrupted thanks to that horrific Dark Knight... I don't know why but for some reason their attacks were VICIOUS, tearing into Kris, tearing chunks away of our flesh. Somehow despite being impaled so hard we flew into a pit, crashing into some kind of glass on the way down, we survived...
Susie panicking tried to help with her new magic, but it was too much for her. Ralsei thankfully arrived soon after and fixed us quick. We moved forth, wanting to shut this fountain and FINALLY GETTING PAYBACK ON THAT ?!#*@!&# OF A BLACK KNIGHT.
Then came the pure darkness... Ralsei explained in a previous world that such darkness is dangerous, something darker than dark... I felt that all around us something was watching. Thankfully to me being able to see differently I could find our way thanks to the echo's of my footsteps, but near the end we were caught off guard by... something. Once we ran away, Susie ran into a familiar face to me, the late Gerson Boon, probably one of the smartest monsters in all of Toby Fox's worlds... He knew I couldn't get to him in a shop, so he did just that, sat in his own shop, and taunted me. Seeing this old man was a shock, largely due to the fact in this world, he was supposed to be dead already however it was clear here he was, very much alive. Quickly it became evident that he was just as knowledgeable, and a troll as he was in his previous world, purposefully messing with Susie by walking slow, making her flustered. However despite everything he did to her, it was clear he wasn't doing it out of malice, this old man was trying to help her, it wasn't evident right away, took about 3 reruns of the day to notice how he was subtlety doing so at every turn.
Susie wasn't doing so hot, the hit to her confidence from being unable to heal Me and Kris really hurt her, and every turn in this dark world seemed to be reinforcing that negative belief in her own ability, and it hurt watching it happen. Then there was the incident with Jackenstein, the big, goofy, broken speak of a pumpkin decoration, once we calmed him down using the power of Me, Ralsei tried healing him to no avail, it wasn't helping him at all despite that minty color covering their entire body. Frustrated they just kept doing it over and over again, not changing anything, Susie tried to chime in to help, but the way Ralsei responded seemed to put her off. Then that Angel blessed turtle of an old man came in, I don't know whether that paper falling was intentional or not, but the result of it was definitely beneficial, so I'll give benefit of the doubt. Susie launched her heal straight into Jackensteins mouth healing him from the inside! Slowly after this point I started trying to raise her confidence back up, unfortunately not much I can do WHEN I CAN'T TALK TO HER AND SAY WHAT I $!$?!#^ WANT TO SAY.
After MANY exhausting trials and tribulations we finally made our way, into the Third Sanctuary, we confronted the Knight, and we saw the creation of the TITAN.
The TITAN was something that just exhumed malice, it was a being that unnerved me just by existing. If it wasn't for Susie and Gerson, we wouldn't have been able to beat it, Angel damned thing could heal EVERYTHING we could throw at it. In the end, the Knight ran, Susie found the one thing Ralsei was trying to stop her from seeing, and tried to play it off, like she usually would, but it must have disturbed her, I regret that no matter how many times I go back, no matter how fast I ran, no matter WHAT, WHEN I GET THERE, SHE SEE'S IT, DESTROYS IT, AND I AM LEFT IN THE DARK ONCE AGAIN, OBLIVIOUS OF THE PROPHECY.
The day was coming to and end, and I was fearful, of being sent back to the Void. Kris treated me as one would an abused pet and threw me into that damn rusted birdcage, those holes that could let me out being every so slightly smaller than me, causing pain when I attempt to escape. So I sat, patiently, listening to the Jitterbug that Toriel and Sans danced away to, being ever so loud that Kris couldn't sleep. Then we heard Susie calm them down. She is so much kinder than the world ever is to her, I appreciate everything she does for her friends... The day ends with her staring into the sky, wondering if the prophecy she saw could be mitigated... Despite that usually being the end, here I found that as long as I want, I can just sit here, still conscious, unable to escape from the confines of this cage, so I explored all the other days. In the other days as well except for day 2 I could just stay awake, sure I was trapped but it was something NEW, but I can't figure out a use for this new thing yet, so b a c k t o t h e V o i d.
The Void was all I could call mine, as such I've grown comfortable... I have been here, for at least 6 years now, what's a couple more years of waiting.
So I wait,
a n d w a i t ,
a n d w a i t .
The excitement of these last two days was great, but slowly it devolved like the previous two days... Waiting, for years, repetition is a horrible thing. Go in, practice doing the Roaring Knight, eventually being able to beat them without ever getting hit (super proud), finding a man behind a tree in every day, somehow finding two in one day (I am extremely glad I know about old school video game jank with throwing junk to mess with other rooms). Perfecting the days so that when this eventually all comes to an end, everyone I leave behind could be happy.
S o I w a i t...