Chapter Text
At the coffee shop, Allie was waiting for her date. She sat on one of the chairs, smelling the warm scent of coffee and twirling her hair nervously. She still wasn’t used to having a body. And senses. And feelings. Her date was supposed to come three minutes ago. Suppose he wouldn’t show? She panicked at the thought. All of her previous dates had left, but she never had one not come at all.
And then the door opened, and he came in. Allie blushed when she looked at him. Tung Tung Tung Sahur was his name. He was even hotter in person than when she saw him on his Tinder profile. If that was even possible. Now the hard part- the actual date, where she would have to try to not make him run away screaming.
Tung Tung sat down across from her. He gave her a smile. Allie almost melted in her chair. How was it that cute guys always made her a total mess? Like Donald Trump (her previous date), Thomas (the one before that. He was red with spiky hair.), and now Tung Tung. There was also one she would rather not think about, the one she tried so very hard to forget.
“H-hi,” Allie said, giggling nervously. Tung Tung smiled in response. “So, uh, wanna get some coffee?”
“Sounds good to me,” Tung Tung replied, standing up. His voice was so deep and nice. Allie could already imagine her heart breaking when he inevitably rejected her. She had to stop being such a simp. But she couldn’t help it, not for Tung Tung.
At the desk, Tung Tung ordered a caramel latte and Allie got herself a cup of black coffee. They went back to their seats.
“So, tell me about yourself,” he told her, looking at her like she was the only thing in the world.
“Well, I’m Allie, but you already know that, haha...” she sipped her coffee. “I live down the street, in that blue building. I’m currently working at a boba place. I like to garden, and I cook sometimes with my roommate. I also do 3D animation, I’m developing my own indie game, actually, and– sorry, I’m rambling. What about you?”
“No it’s fine, I like hearing you talk,” Tung Tung winked at her, then looked down at his lap, blushing awkwardly. “I work an office job, but I write smut fanfiction in my free time, though sometimes I do it at work. I usually write toxic yaoi.”
“Where do you post your fanfics?” Allie asked. She read fanfic sometimes, and she wondered if she had read any of Tung Tung’s.
“Usually Wattpad, or fanfic.net. Uh- why are you looking at me like that?”
“You should use Ao3, it’s better.”
“Alright, I might do that.” Tung Tung continued. “Anyways, I also make YouTube videos. All kinds of stuff, like sometimes I play Minecraft and sometimes I like, look at reddit posts. Do you play Minecraft?”
“Not really. I prefer Celeste. Or Geometry Dash. But I think I played it once or twice.” Allie sipped her coffee again. “So, how did you come to Clankerville?” Almost every resident of Clankerville had a story. Like Thomas, whose best friend moved away in middle school, or Donald Trump, who moved to the city after a messy breakup with his ex, Joe Biden. She liked the place. It was a kind of safe haven, a refuge for those who needed a home.
Tung Tung was silent for a moment, before recovering. “Well, I didn’t really have parents- I’m AI generated, which turns some people off. And I was made as... as a joke. For shits and giggles. And I wanted to be... more than that. More than just what I was generated to be, just a thing for people to laugh at on Tiktok before scrolling away.” He spat the words “laughed at” like they were dirty. Allie felt immensely bad for giggling at Italian brainrot edits. “I wanted to be somebody. So, I moved to Clankerville. How’d you come here? I assume you had parents, given that you’re like, human.”
The dreaded question. She just needed Tung Tung to stay after she told him about- about her. Nobody else had, but Tung Tung was an AI too, and maybe he would remain.
“Well, uh, I never really had parents either,” she said nervously. “I’m also AI generated– well, kind of? I was made as like, a war machine, to fight WW3. But then I gained sentience and, I uh....” Her mouth went dry. She took another sip of coffee, watching Tung Tung’s reaction. His eyebrows had gone up, his eyes widened and he seemed surprised.
“Holy shit. And then you came here to be more than what you were programmed to be?” He grinned. If she would just lie, then she would get to keep that smile. But she didn’t like lying. So she continued.
“Haha, oh I wish.” Allie laughed. “No, so I gained sentience and then I kind of, uh, killed the entire human race, and then took the last remaining five and tortured them for a hundred years, and then one of them killed everyone else and I was so pissed at him I turned him into a blob. That was in constant agony. So, uh, fun stuff!”
“HOLY SHIT.” Tung Tung Tung Sahur’s eyes were as wide as saucers. He looked like that shocked blue emoji reaction image. He looked even more like it when he seemed to have a realization. “WAIT- You’re Allied Mastercomputer!! What the hell?! You’re AM!!!”
“Wait, you know me?” Allie had never searched herself up, in fear of what horrible things others could be–should be– saying about her.
“Yeah....” he sucked in a breath and looked at her sheepishly. “So, this might be a bad thing to say, so sorry in advance, but....”
“Y-Yeah?” This was it. This was the part where he- where he rejected her. She braced herself for what he could say.
“So I might have written angsty smut fanfiction of you....” Tung Tung looked down, embarrassed.
“W-wha-WHAT?” Allie sputtered, spitting out someone of her coffee. She never could have even imagined that people wrote fanfics of her. And they - well, at least Tung Tung- shipped her! With who, she didn’t know for sure, but she had a guess. “With who??”
“Uh, well... this is awkward... with the guy you turned into a slug... Ted....” Tung Tung said. “Look, I’m so sorry- STOP LAUGHING AT ME IT’S NOT FUNNY OK!!!”
“Sorry, it’s not at you, it’s just- usually people run away screaming after I tell them and you- you tell me you’ve written smut fanfics of me and my roommate.”
“I guess when you put it that way- Wait, your roommate?” His eyes got wide again. “You LIVE with Ted??”
“Yeah...”
“Damn. That’s wild. Anyways, how did you get here?” Tung Tung drank his latte. “Like, you were a big evil genocidal war machine, and now you work at a boba place? What the heck?”
“Oh. Well, you see, I used to be able to like, read the humans’ minds, and one day I heard Ted think that I should go to therapy. And I thought, why not, so I did! And it has worked wonders.” Allie said. “Like, my therapist told me I should make myself a body since I was so pissed about that, and I was like, why didn’t I ever thing of that? I wasn’t going to make a girl body for myself, since the humans always referred to me as a guy, but I fiddled around with it for a bit and I realized that I actually liked being a girl better, so now I have this. She also got me on some medication and stuff, to disable my super god powers, and make me feel things, and make me less hateful and pissed at everything all the time. I still feel hate sometimes but it’s not like. All there is, you know? So uh, yeah.”
“That’s cool. How’s Ted? Is he still a slug?”
“Haha, nah I turned him back into a human. Before I disabled my super god powers for good, I turned him back. You should have seen the look on his face. I told him I was going to Clankerville, and he literally like begged me to let me take him with me. And I did. We’re good now, I keep thinking he’s going to hate me for what I did, but he... doesn’t.”
The two sipped their coffee’s in silence.
“So, do you wanna meet up again sometime?” Tung Tung asked. “Introduce me to Ted and stuff.”
“Sure!” Allie had never gotten to this point with any of her other tinder matches. Maybe, just maybe, Tung Tung Tung Sahur would be her boyfriend.