Chapter Text
As Karr opened the newly replaced door of his apartment, he wondered what this feeling was that had spread through him. This apartment had been broken into, things had been broken. That was all taken care of now, but the feeling that some stranger had been in here, unsettled him in a strange way.
He set the dog he was carrying down on the floor, letting her sniff the air. She had almost run into his car the other day. He had barely managed to avoid hitting her. A dog that looked surprisingly well taken care of for a stray, the vet had said. She didn’t have a collar, nor a chip. But the vet had assumed she had been recently abandoned.
And something had snapped in him at that.
So now he had a dog. He had never had any sort of pet, but reading up on a few books and blogs had taught him quite a lot. And the dog seemed to be grateful for it too. Now we watched her explore the unfamiliar apartment, curious and without fear.
He wondered if she knew that he wasn’t going to harm her. That he had taken pity on this small thing being left to fend for herself.
Lady, he had called her. Like in that Kid’s story Matthew loved so much. And because that dog, even though she had been left behind by her owners, held herself like a dignified and quite beautiful little damsel.
Or something like that. The thought made him snort.
He put down the supplies he had bought, filled one of the bowls with water and watched Lady circled around the living room that was also the bed room as if she wanted to share opinions about it.
“I know it’s small. I never needed anything bigger.” He explained to the dog, who only looked at him for a moment before going back to sniff at everything.
There was the six hour car ride tomorrow, that Summer had talked him into. She had wanted to get away after all the horrors she had seen. Just for a day or two. And she had never been to San Francisco. He had only been briefly and that had been for a case. He hadn’t managed to take any photos.
Lady seemed to enjoy car rides, contrary to what Cindy had told him. All dogs Cindy knew had hated cars. But Lady had simply curled up on the blanket in the passenger’s seat and slept the entire ride home.
Summer didn’t know that he would bring the dog. But Summer loved dogs, she wouldn’t mind this at all.
And for a moment things just seemed perfect. Calm, peaceful. He wasn’t sure he had ever felt this sense of calm before. Of safety, even though this apartment had been broken into, even though Summer had seen things she would never forget. Even though he had almost died.
Again.
Maybe the dog added to the safety. Not that she was any match for an intruder, but he had the feeling she would try anyway.
Two months he hadn’t been here. There was a faint layer of dust on everything now, even after he and Cindy had cleaned it all up once the insurance had taken care of the aftermath of the break in. Nothing had been stolen, the property damage was minor. They really had only broken in to kidnap Summer and leave.
He still wasn’t sure how to talk to her about that. She had been asking a lot of uncomfortable questions the many times they had talked to each other on the phone. He had deflected most of them, unsure how to explain anything without revealing what he was.
He had stayed at the SSC and Cindy’s place the entire time, and only now after having picked up Lady, he felt he would not go insane alone in this apartment. It had never been supposed to be a permanent solution. He only used it to store things, and occasionally for Summer to sleep here. He rarely stayed here when he was alone. It was something he had never been able to shake.
He hated being alone.
It didn’t need to be people he knew necessarily. Just someone on the vicinity, some semblance of life in the area. Silence reminded him too much of the horrors he had faced when he had been much younger.
He found himself wishing Wilton was still alive sometimes, just to let the man see what he had done to him. How he had created a life and didn’t accept the responsibility that came with it.
It was ironic that the man who had initially ended up giving the order to shut him down, had eventually ended up being almost a father figure.
That morning he had found Devon slumped over on his desk, lifeless, he would never forget. The devastation of feeling as if the floor had been ripped out from under him. Almost a physical sensation even. Devon had been the only barrier between him and the board of directors. The board didn’t know he wasn’t human. They still didn’t. And he could never reveal this to anyone.
They would hunt him, shut him down. They wouldn’t care about his stellar track record. The two years before Michael had finally been allowed to actually take the position at FLAG he had been supposed to have the second Devon passed, had felt like forever. A constant fear of being unsafe, then Kitt had nearly been killed just because of the greed of another rich fuck that didn’t think sentient AI needed to be treated with respect and acceptance.
It was disgusting.
Karr had long since accepted that some people would never respect what he was because of what he had done. And while he didn’t like it, it was no use hoping that would ever change. But Kitt had never intentionally harmed anyone. Not in the same way Karr had.
For Kitt to have been attacked the way he had been, that had been like a punch in the face. And even now that things were finally slowly going back to the new normal they were all still getting used to, Karr couldn’t help but feel like the next storm was just around the corner, waiting for them to let their guard down.
The thought of leaving Kitt behind for a few days put him on edge. Now, there were six more AIs on their side, all of them grateful for having been saved, put into new bodies. Cindy had outdone herself with six new androids within three weeks, Bonnie and Sarah had worked on five new vehicles too with the dual switch system. This time around Cindy had not given them the choice on what would be the primary system. This time it was the android for all of them. A choice out of fear, because the cars were targets.
Karr wasn’t sure if all of them had been okay with that choice, and he hadn’t asked. The important part was that there were six people that would protect Kitt simply out of respect for him.
Karr knew he would never have a support system like that. The only people going out of their way for him would be Kitt, Cindy and Michael.
Lady gave him a small bark, ripping him out of his thoughts as if she sensed his spiral into self hatred. He doubted it, dogs couldn’t sense the emotions of a machine. That would be impossible. No, right now he needed to focus on the road trip and packing some things so he could pick up Summer in the morning and they would just drive for a while.
Lady had shown that she was obedient and would listen to him call her, even though this was probably not the name she had initially been given, and she clearly didn’t know the most basic of tricks.
But she seemed smart enough, he was sure he could teach her something. The thought made him chuckle. Him. A teacher. The AI that had started out knowing nothing, because he had intentionally been kept without knowledge.
He wasn’t sure where that sudden spike of rage came from, but it made him want to throw something. Anger at people he couldn’t make responsible for what they had done, was nothing new. But this rage was almost blinding. It was strange.
Unwelcome.
Lady tilted her head at him, a small whine sounding from her.
He shook himself out of it. Getting mad at dead people was unproductive.
Sarah had insisted on compensation for all of the AIs for having been mistreated and abused and at first he hadn’t understood why. Then Sarah had explained that it was because since they weren’t human they couldn’t sue anyone without revealing what they are. And in the eyes of the public they weren’t people.
So to circumvent it entirely Sarah had just paid them what she thought was appropriate for the pain that had been caused.
And he still didn’t know what to do with seven figures.
He didn’t deserve any of this to begin with. If anything he had been the least affected by all of this. If he hadn’t existed, none of them would be in this situations.
But Kitt wouldn’t exist either… that thought frightened him.
He heaved a heavy sigh, trying to keep his emotions in check. This had always been an issue. Emotions were hard to control, difficult to name and categorize. And they translated too easy still after all these years.
Lady settled on the couch as if she had never done anything else before and he moved around the apartment to pack some things. Sometimes he wondered how Summer had still not been suspicious. On the other hand even after she had seen the cars drive by themselves, she didn’t believe in anything beyond what she had seen scientifically proven. Maybe she also didn’t want to believe it.
Her mother had definitely told her the horror story of what had happened to her when she had been younger. Another reason he hesitated so much to tell her the truth.
Mandy would rip his head off if she ever learned who he was. And she was suspicious about him anyway. Had been from the start.
Shoving the thoughts away he put a movie on, one he barely cared to check the title of. It was just for background noise so he didn’t feel like he couldn’t stay here for the night. The dog was here. He wasn’t alone, and still.
It was difficult to stay focused without a clear task, thoughts constantly wandering to darker memories. He should have been grateful for the life he had right now.
It was the best he had ever been treated. He had people he considered family, and even with all the shit that had happened, there were people that cared about him.
If only he wouldn’t constantly doubt that they would stick to him even if he made a mistake.
It was impossible.
So many years and he still couldn’t shake the feeling that people only tolerated him. That he was deeply flawed and would lose all these people around him the second he did something wrong.
He had never wanted to be perfect, he had just wanted to be accepted for what he was.
His eyes burned and he snarled at it. Emotions.
They fucking sucked.
He sat down next to the dog, surprised when she stood and curled into his lap. She looked at him for a second, huffed and settled back down with a yawn.
That made him smile.
Things were okay. If only he could forget the past just a little. Just enough to feel as if he didn’t constantly have to prove that he was not a monster.
He was dimly aware that this wasn’t reality when he opened his eyes. This place he had seen before. A dark wasteland, filled with ruins. It looked like a battlefield. The sky was pitch black, almost all sound swallowed by it.
It was dark and he was alone, and that by itself was terrifying enough, even when he knew this wasn’t real. He had never been able to interrupt this, had to endure until something happened that jolted his mind enough.
Often he wondered if he would become trapped in here if he didn’t manage to find such a thing.
“Leave!” A voice growled at him.
It was everywhere, so loud he cringed at it. “This is mine!”
It was a nightmare, there was little point in engaging with this. He had heard about humans being able to change things when they became aware of the fact that they were dreaming. He had never had the luxury. He could only endure whatever his mind threw at him. It had always been like that.
A few days ago he had found some kind of ancient artifact in this scene. It had looked so out of place that his mind had finally caught up with the fact that this wasn’t real and he could just leave.
Now he was aware that he could leave somehow. But the way to do it, that was unknown again. It was different every time after all.
Something flew at him and he ducked away only for the rock to change direction and hit him in the head. The pain was stronger than it should have been.
He bit back a scream as he landed in the black dust on the ground. This was different. Nothing had ever attacked him here. Not like this.
“LEAVE!” the voice again, booming, threatening to shatter his eardrums even though that was impossible. None of this was real!
A billowing cloud of black smoke started to rise in front of him, robbing his breath. Also impossible. None of this was supposed to happen!
He didn’t need to breathe like humans, not like that! It was a necessary function, but it wouldn’t kill him if he stopped- not the same way-
And yet, he coughed as he scrambled back to his feet, stumbling, near falling again.
He was a coward, he knew that. Always running, always avoiding. The cloud followed him no matter how fast he ran and eventually he was caught at the edge of a cliff.
This wasn’t real!
But it was futile. The fear had taken over his thoughts, poisoned the logic with irrational panic.
Jump or be engulfed in whatever that thing was going to do with him.
He had been in such a situation long ago. Both outcomes were bad.
If he jumped maybe he had a chance-
the choice was taken from him as a vaguely person-shaped thing emerged from the cloud of smoke. It wasn’t really a person, it was made of this same material, almost intangible. And it lunged at him, pushing him down.
“IT IS MINE.” The voice growled. “THIS IS NOT YOURS.”
Karr screamed as he jolted awake, eyes wide, staring at the ceiling of his small apartment. Breath coming too fast, his head still hurting. He was lying on the floor as if he had fallen off the couch. Maybe he had hit the coffee table? Was that why his head was hurting?
And then… the panic hit him again when he remembered what had just happened. A typical nightmare, like the hundreds of others he had had. Too many of them to count, too many to want to recall.
Lady was next to him, whining, licking his face. And all he could do was stare at the ceiling, trying to reel this terror back in.
It hadn’t been real. Hadn’t been!
He clumsily wiped at his face with shaking hands, realizing Lady was licking the tears. There was no salt in them, it was just water. The dog didn’t seem to care.
He reached out to pet her and she huffed, curling up into a donut against his face as if to comfort him.
Turning to his side he wrapped an arm around the dog, the thought of being comforted by an animal that didn’t even know the cruel things he had done finally broke the dam.
He was no stranger to violent outbursts of emotion, it was rarely just a little. All or nothing. Constantly. He wasn’t just unsettled, he was disturbed. And the android bodies Cindy had built had never allowed him to hide his emotions very well in the first place.
The problems started when he tried to suppress them for too long. So often he had managed to lock the body up, overload the neural network, unable to control it for extended periods of time because of this.
But here no one would see this. And Lady didn’t seem too bothered by it.
“I’m sorry-” he hissed into the dogs fur, not quite sure who he was even apologizing to.
Summer for having lied to her? Mandy for not having walked away immediately when he became aware of the fact? Michael and Kitt for still bothering them after so many years? Cindy? For worrying her constantly?
Wilton? For not being perfect, for having disappointed the man?
He couldn’t sort his thoughts. He had to ride it out. And it would exhaust him. But Summer still wanted to go on the road trip. And he could function like this too. Driving for a few hours was probably the one thing that could calm him down now.
Summer stormed out the front door as he got out of the car in front of her house, much earlier than planned.
He simply couldn’t stand being alone any longer.
She jumped at him with so much force, he nearly lost his balance. He hadn’t thought it possible for her to hug him as tightly as she did. It was comforting.
Her heart hammered against her chest, he could sense it with how close she was. “Are you really okay?” She whispered, voice trembling.
It was a difficult question to answer after that night. If he had stayed at Cindy’s place, he wouldn’t have had to deal with this alone. But he couldn’t just always run to someone to solve his issues for him.
He deliberately ignored the nagging little thought that this was exactly what he was doing right now. Summer didn’t know much of the things he dealt with. He had always managed to hide this from her, stayed awake when she was around. It wasn’t much of an issue. Sometimes he needed to power down, but he had planned most of their little get togethers around that.
She wouldn’t ever know unless he told her. And he really should have after all of this. But for a little while longer he wanted to have her around.
There was no way she would still get this close once she learned what he really was, after all.
“Most of me, yeah.” he whispered finally, squeezing her back.
There had been nothing that Cindy hadn’t been able to rebuild and Bonnie had looked him over too. And even after touching that main board of this… terrifying copy in Mike’s room, Cindy and Bonnie hadn't been able to find anything wrong.
“Mom has been asking about you too.” Summer whispered. “I think she finally realized you’re actually a good person.”
He resisted the urge to scoff. No, Mandy was right in that regard. What he had done to that woman was unforgivable, and she still suffered the consequences. She didn’t have to forgive him and he didn’t expect her to.
He did owe her an apology anyway, but maybe that could wait a bit longer. When he was less irritated.
Summer slowly moved away from him, looking him over. “Are you sure you should be running around? Are you still hurt?”
“I’m fine.” He smirked at her. It was a completely new android after all. No harm had ever come to it, yet.
She didn’t look convinced, but moved a step backwards anyway. “Come inside for a moment, okay? Just to put my mom’s mind at ease, please?”
He couldn’t argue with her logic. The house he had been in twice, and once he had realized who Summer’s mother was he had done his best to avoid the woman.
Mandy looked him up and down as Summer dragged him inside, frowning slightly. “…You look entirely too healthy for having been exploded in a car.” She commented.
That woman was too smart for her own good.
What was he even supposed to say? The woman had studied three different science fields, she knew humans wouldn’t recover from something like this without a single scar. “Cindy knows some very skilled people.” He tried. That wasn’t a lie.
Mandy tensed the way she always did when she heard his voice, but she recovered quickly. “It’s only been two months.” She leaned in closer, inspecting his face. “…Your hair’s shorter.”
It wasn’t. But humans had a funny perception of things when they wanted to see something.
“Very skilled people. Like I said.” he repeated.
“Mom…” Summer whined, looking back at him. “I’m… just really glad you’re actually okay.”
He wasn’t used to people worrying about him that weren’t immediate family, so to speak. Cindy and Avery always texted him when he hadn’t shown up for a few days.
Nodding he glanced at her, now noting she hadn’t even put on shoes when she had run out to greet him. She grabbed her backpack from the door, pocketed her keys and wallet and grinned at her mother.
“Are you really up for a drive that far?” Mandy asked him.
“We’re taking turns.” Summer insisted. He had wondered before how it was so easy for her to lie to her mother. Maybe this was just a human trait. He wasn’t a fan of lying anyway. But he knew how to twist the truth.
“It was nice to see you again.” He nodded at Mandy, then turned to leave.
Mandy watched them walk over to the car, and Karr couldn’t help but flick the scanner once, making the woman jump.
Maybe he would tell her some day.
At the car, Summer looked at him intently.
“What?” He asked, stopping.
“You know my mom is right.”
“About what?”
“About not recovering that fast after what happened…. if at all.” She muttered, crossing her arms on the roof of his car. “I saw what happened.”
He paused, glancing at her. She obviously hadn’t told her mother about this, but now all these questions he had tried to avoid, would finally need answering.
“And what is your conclusion?” He challenged.
Summer rolled her eyes, throwing the backpack in the trunk that opened for her automatically. He wondered if one day she would realize cars from that era didn’t really do that.
As she shut the trunk she saw Lady shift in the backseat, and her eyes lit up.
“Oh hello!” She opened the door and immediately had she small dog jump at her as if Lady was greeting an old friend. “Who are you?”
“Her name is Lady.” Karr answered, glad the dog had distracted Summer from all her questions. At least for now. “I found her a few days ago, someone must’ve have abandoned her.”
“Yeah, people do that around summer break a lot.” Summer muttered, happily petting the the soft fur. “Oh, you’re so cute!”
“You never said that to me.” Karr commented, getting into the car.
“You’re not cute, you’re attractive.”
He couldn’t help the laugh that escaped him. It was beyond him why she thought that. He had been aware, simply couldn’t understand it. How anyone could ever see him as anything but a monster, it was a mystery to him.
If he ever told her, things between them would change. These silly interactions would stop. She would probably hate him for having been lied to.
Summer joined him after shutting the door, taking off her shoes immediately. Something she just always did whenever they were in the car for a bit longer.
“Do you have the address?”
“I texted that to you last night.” She frowned slightly, pulling out her phone to show him. Somehow he had missed this. “Did you not get it?
He looked at his phone, shaking his head. “No.”
Unusual.
“Do you need a map?” She continued, opening the glove compartment only to, once more, realize there were no maps in there.
“I know where that is.” the benefit of being able to connect to GPS data and see the entire map in a way no human would ever understand.
It all had its advantages.
“I can barely remember how to get home… how do you do this?”
“Good memory.” He smirked.
She huffed, reaching for the radio. At least she shared his taste in music. And for a while they drove in comfortable silence, scenery changing along the coast, and Summer seemed to have forgotten all about the million questions she had had just a bit ago.
The sun was burning down on them, wit no shade being provided. He had air conditioning in the car, but it had been acting up for a few days. Something he wanted to have Bonnie look at before this trip and forgot.
Why had he forgotten?
He wasn’t supposed to forget…
Lady was starting to pant on the backseat as they passed through a small city and he decided it was good enough for a break. The buildings provided some shade, Summer probably needed to stretch her legs anyway.
He parked at a cafe, watching Summer put on her shoes again. “What, you need to pee?” She joked, getting out of the car.
He watched her stretch and then open the backseat to let Lady out. The dog seemed happy enough to be freed of the overheating piece of metal and circled around Summer.
Karr handed her a bottle of water and a bowl, then got out of the car, nearly crashing into the ground with the sharp pain that suddenly surged through his head.
And that was an issue he should have told Cindy about too. Why was he so distracted? This never happened to him!
Summer frowned as he gripped after the door to steady himself. “You okay?”
He bit down the fear, the images of the nightmare, all the implications this could have. Something could be wrong. It could also be nothing. Not knowing was freaking him out. And he couldn’t check without making Summer suspicious.
“Y-yeah.” he managed, locking his jaw.
“Okay. I’m going to go pee in that cafe over there, do you want a coffee?” She said, sounding somewhat distant.
“Yeah…” If only to get her to leave for a while.
He staggered around the car to Lady, sitting down heavily. He needed to check this… but now he was already sitting.
Lady looked up at him, water dripping from her muzzle. He reached out, hand shaking. The dog didn’t care, readily approached for some extra pets.
Maybe the night had just taken more out of him than he had thought. And still this nagging feel that something was wrong wouldn’t leave him.
It took him a few more minutes to get up again and move to the trunk to look at the laptop he had stored in there. The remote connection to it failed twice, which was also concerning. Something was wrong after all. But what?
He grabbed for the cable to get a direct connection when Summer returned, two cups in her hands, one of them obnoxiously pink. She loved these overly sweet things. He wasn’t much of a fan.
And when their eyes met her smile dropped.
She knew something was wrong. How, he had no idea, but it was obvious in how her expression shifted.
“I can drive for a bit, if you’re tired.” She offered.
He had never let anyone but Bonnie willingly drive this car. Kro had taken it by force. And every time he connected to the system now, for the first few moments it felt as if it wasn’t his anymore.
But Summer couldn’t get into it. He could stay connected and she wouldn’t even realize. “Okay.”
He wasn’t sure why he agreed. Summer had never driven this car.
“…really?” She sounded way too excited about that fact.
He nodded, shutting the trunk. Maybe he would get a moment later to check on the system. Or manage to get remote access.
Lady had wandered off to do her business in a bush and Karr picked up the almost empty bowl, watering a nearby planter with it before he returned the items to the car. The dog seemed to take that as her cue to get back in too.
Too smart for her own good. How could this small abandoned thing be so trusting of him? So certain that he wouldn’t just leave her here too, like her previous owners had? He ran a shaking hand through her fur as Summer shut the driver’s door, making him jump.
He had allowed her to do that. And still it felt so wrong. No one had ever asked permission before.
Not even Bonnie.
But he trusted Bonnie. By now anyway. That had taken a while.
He shut the door, moving to the passenger’s side.
He had never sat there before.
It felt wrong.
“You’re really silent.” Summer noted as she adjusted the seat and mirrors. “Are you in pain or something? I saw a pharmacy over there.”
“I’m fine.” He was surprised at how clipped his tone was. That wasn’t what he had intended.
And then there was anger at himself over this. Why?
Summer lifted an eyebrow at him. “I think you really need a nap.” She half joked.
He huffed, crossing his arms and leaning back in the seat. He wasn’t sure if he could relax like this.
“Maybe I should get a map first-”
“Another 253.7 miles on this road.” He said before he could stop himself.
Shit.
Humans never were this precise with any measurement. Not when they weren’t directly looking at the exact number.
He usually had a better grasp on this!
“…Sometimes i think you really have a GPS in your head or something. How do you know that?” Summer sounded baffled.
“I’m really good at remembering things.” he deflected.
“I thought you said you’ve only been to San Francisco once.” She muttered, starting the engine. It stuttered, dying on her.
She took her hand off the key, staring at the dashboard in confusion, then shock and surprise when the engine turned over by itself.
It hadn’t, he had forced it. But there was no way she would have ever made that connection.
“Mind of its own.” he muttered simply.
Summer hummed, patting the steering wheel gently. “….Only for a while, you’ll have your person back in a few hours.” She whispered as if she was talking to someone in the car.
Now it was his turn to stare at her in shock.
She laughed nervoulsy when she noticed his gaze. “…W-well… I- I talked to that mustang and-”
“Go on.”
“It-… he? Is it a he? He. Is he a he? A-anyway I spoke to that car and …” Summer stammered, cheeks turning red in embarrassment. “Well maybe… you said there was a computer in the car and… I am invading a space that isn’t mine- So… i wanted to make sure the car knew it was only temporary.” She groaned running her hands over her face. “Please don’t laugh-”
No. Laughing was the last thing that had entered his mind. His eyes burned with emotion. No one had ever said anything like that to him. Not like this. Cindy didn’t know him in any other form but the android. She had never seen him being the car.
She knew about it of course, but she had barely ever asked about it.
Summer had just surprised him.
“D-did i say something wrong?” She back pedalled in surprise when she looked back at him, eyes wide and ready to apologize for whatever she had just done.
He shook his head. “…no one has ever talked like that to... the car.” He couldn’t reveal it. Not like this.
“Ahhh it’s embarrassing!” She cringed, finally backing out of the parking space.
“It’s… comforting.” He muttered instead. “Safe…”
She made a confused noise, pulling into the road to follow it.
“You know,” She said two hours later, startling him.
Two hours had passed. Why didn’t he have any recollection of it? “I don’t get it. I really thought they wouldn’t let me see you until you’ve recovered enough to have visitors… but it’s as if nothing ever happened.”
He stayed quiet.
“I am really glad you’re okay but I am scared you’re hiding injuries or something., because you’re super silent. That’s not like you.”
It wasn’t. They would talk about a million things for hours, usually. But he couldn’t find anything to talk about, the worry still eating at him.
What was wrong with his system? And Why hadn’t he just turned around and went to Cindy? She could have fixed this.
But Summer had been so excited.
“I assure you, I am fine.” He insisted.
“Seriously, Carter, that car exploded! I saw it!”
The name caught him off guard. She didn’t know. She barely ever used his name. It was usually just some form of endearment. This did imply that she was serious.
“Will you stop with all these questions if I tell you?” He gave up. She would find out eventually, anyway. The timing was bad. He barely knew two things about relationships. Cindy had given him a lot of advice but as with all things that involved humans, there were too many variables to account for every situation.
Normal people didn’t get into such a situation in the first place. But Summer had surprised him earlier too. Maybe she would take it better than he thought.
Ha. Wishful thinking.
She tilted her head. “Yes?”
“You better” He smirked at her. “Once we get there…” He muttered, already hoping she would forget about it by the time they arrived.
He had no idea what kind of place it would be in the first place. Something her mother had picked out, that was all he knew. And given the address she had shown him, somewhere in the woods, a bit out from the actual city.
Odd choice.
By the time they arrived, Karr had somewhat calmed down. There had been no more lapses in memory and the fear had slowly dissipated. By the time Summer parked the car, he even thougth that it had just been a glitch.
It was a log cabin in the woods, two floors, and a lot bigger than Michael’s house. Out of the city, far enough away from everything to not be bothered.
“…You know this is how every horror movie starts?” He sighed as he let Lady out of the car.
“Don’t do that…” Summer muttered, her curious expression shifting into concern. “My parents stayed here that one fall in ‘84. Dad proposed to her here. And apparently mom liked it so much that she kept wanting to go but things happened and well, now we are here instead.”
Karr glanced at her for a second, then focused back on the dog. Lady was already exploring the area, sniffing the grass and flowers and all the surroundings.
“’84, huh…”
Summer nodded. “I don’t know the full story but Mom said she almost got killed and that made her rethink her entire life and how she didn’t want to be stuck with a guy who gave into temptation that easily. Whatever that means.”
Karr turned away, trying to hide the horror he felt at these words, by getting their luggage out of the car. Two backpacks and his laptop. It wasn’t a lot.
“She said you reminded her of that, when she first saw you.” Summer shrugged, moving towards the lockbox with the key inside. “Something about your voice digging up some thing she didn’t want to think about ever again.” She shrugged, unlocked the front door and let the dog inside.
Karr clenched his jaw, picked up the bag with supplies for the dog from the backseat and followed Summer and Lady inside.
What was he doing here?
If he told Summer the truth, Mandy would find out.
And all other implications aside, that woman would not let him off the hook.
“Did I say something wrong?” Summer asked, tilting her head when he put the backpacks on the couch.
He shook his head. “Just thinking about some things I have done, that I am not proud of.”
“I think we all have those things.” She smiled at him, kicked her shoes off and sprawled herself across the couch, happily joined by Lady who jumped onto her back, making her laugh.
“I guess so.”
“So,” Summer said, half turning towards him, careful not to shake the dog off, “You wanted to explain once we arrived.”
Damn it.
“Yeah…” Suddenly the room felt too small and too big at the same time. He couldn’t gauge what would happen if she reacted badly. And she probably would. “…Can we take a walk while I explain this?”
“Sure.” Summer nodded, still trapped under the dog.
Karr lured to dog off her with a treat he had found in the pocket of his jacket. Something he assumed would happen a lot more often. Cindy had said that even years after her dog had died she’d found treats in pockets of jackets.
Lady jumped off, happily accepting the treat and Summer got back up. “A walk sounds nice after sitting for so long.”
That wasn’t really anything that bothered him. He didn’t get sore the same way humans did.
Summer pocketed the key and put her shoes back on, then followed him outside.
“Are you not gonna leash her?” She asked as Lady circled around the too.
“She listens to me calling her.” Karr simply shrugged.
Summer hummed, following him. “Mom said the beach isn’t far from here.”
He paused, staring at her.
Summer frowned, then grimaced. “I can go alone, it’s no big deal. Mom wanted some shells from here.”
Somehow the thought of leaving her alone in an unfamiliar place didn’t sit right with him either. “Tomorrow?” He tried, still hoping she would just forget.
“Okay.”
They walked in silence for a moment and he noticed that there was no phone reception here at all. Exactly like all those horror movies KITT and him had watched. While his Kitt would not shut up about movies and their unrealistic depiction of events, KITT was all for it.
Karr was fine with just the background noise.
“Now tell me.” Summer demanded. She had walked a few paces ahead, now going backwards. arms crossed. “You said you would.”
He sighed, angered at himself. She would have to learn this eventually if this was supposed to last longer than a year.
“I am scared of your reaction.” He admitted.
She stopped, lifting an eyebrow. “Did you cheat on me?”
That almost made him laugh. “That thought never occurred to me.”
“Then what else could there be that I could react badly to?”
So many things… he thought.
“Theres a branch behind you.” He warned and Summer stopped just in time to step over it before she tripped.
“You’re not getting out of this, Carter. I want answers.” She insisted.
He closed his eyes for a moment, the sharp pain searing through his skull just for the fraction of a second again.
Damn. He had thought this had fixed itself.
It was enough to disorient him, but gone so fast he barely managed to register it as pain.
Summer stopped, narrowing her eyes at him. Lady had stopped too, turning back to them as if to tell them to hurry up.
“That isn’t actually my name.” He finally started. That would be the easiest to explain. He only hoped she wouldn’t tell her mother about it.
“Yeah, you all use aliases. Mike told me about it. So what’s your real name?”
She took that better than he had expected. “Karr.”
“I thought that was a nickname. Avery and Cindy call you that.”
He nodded.
“Do you like it more than the alias?”
“It is my name.” He shrugged. It was an acronym, but it had become his name. And while he wasn’t sure what in the world Wilton was thinking when he gave that to him, it was still that one unique thing that defined him as his own person. Everything else had been copied over to Kitt.
But his name.
That was his alone.
“I think it’s about as stupid as calling your kid Summer…” She sighed. “What does that even mean? Did your parents like cars?”
He chuckled, welcoming the distraction from that weird glitch, even when it was an uncomfortable topic. “It’s spelled differently.”
She shook her head, amused. “I know you’re adopted, but really, did your real parents hate you that much?”
He supposed if one was to apply human terms to both of them, then yes. “I guess they did.”
“Horrible.” She grimaced, climbing across another branch. “But your real name has nothing to do with what happened back there.”
He sighed. “You know the organization i work for. They… have a lot more skeletons in the closet than we thought, initially.”
Summer raised an eyebrow. “I thought you’re just employed… not involved in some shady shit. You’re not involved in shady shit, right?”
A snort escaped him. “Not what you’re thinking, no. The man that kidnapped you was the CEO of it for a while in the 90s. He… did a lot of bad things.”
“To you?”
“Not to me directly. Just to people who are related to me in a way… if you want to call it that. They’re not human.”
Maybe that would take the edge of the truth. Maybe she would not freak out over it, then.
“Oh so …like that mustang? The friendly one? Related how?”
He really wasn’t sure what else to call the other five AIs. Kro was definitely a brother, for lack of a better term. He had the Knight in his acronym. The other five were different. And still, even though they weren’t made the same way, they were all somehow involved.
“All from the same idea some delusional rich man had a few decades ago.”
“Mike told me about artificial intelligence and I don’t think I really understand what that means. But it all has to do something with computers. Are you involved with that too?”
“Yeah.” Another sigh escaped him. “I…” he paused, unsure how to word it. “The reason I’m fine is because I…” The way she looked at him made him stop again.
How was he supposed to word this? With everyone else he had ever told, he had taken joy in freaking them out. Why was it so difficult now?
Summer frowned slightly, walking back up to him. She had stayed quiet, concern in her gaze. Would she still look at him like that once she knew?
“…do you trust me so little that you think I would get mad over something you haven’t told me?” She asked, voice soft, gentle even.
“I don’t know.” He muttered. “…Trust is something I don’t give easily anymore.”
“I know.” She whispered, tugging his sleeve. “Tell me. Then we can talk about it. And if i get upset I’ll just go calm down and then we talk.”
He ran his hands over his face. “This is classified… don’t tell anyone about it who doesn’t already know.”
“Who knows?”
“Cindy, Michael, Mike, Sarah… all the people you met at the SSC.”
“Okay.” She nodded, “Now spill it.” her voice had taken on a playful tone, a glint in her eyes.
He closed his eyes. If anything, Lady didn’t care at least. The dog would stick to him even if Summer was driven away by the truth.
“Consider what Mike told you about AI and the androids…” He started, biting his lip so hard it split. That would take days to fix itself again. Great. He kept doing it too.
“Okay. Cindy builds androids. And these cars have computers inside them. One of them talked to me.” Summer shrugged. “That creepy car even drove by itself too.” She blabbed. “Come to think of it…” She muttered looking back up at him. “The voice of that thing was freakishly similar to yours…”
He turned away, jaw locked. He hadn’t known that. He had never heard it speak… Of course they would have copied everything. It had made sense. Why make something new if they could have just stolen the base? He wasn’t sure how they had even gotten that in the first place, but there was still a gap of 14 years where he hadn’t been active beyond his own processor. They could have made hundreds of copies of him and he wouldn’t have known.
“Yeah.” He muttered. “Somehow that doesn’t surprise me.”
She was still looking at him when he turned back to her.
“I… I am one of them.” He finally said, pressing his eyes shut as he turned his head away, too scared to look into her face, seeing her reaction.
The silence stretched, neither of them willing to say anything for a long moment.
“I… am an Artificial Intelligence inside of an android body.” he eventually added, head still turned away from her. “I didn’t mean to deceive you. It was safer for you if you didn’t know… and I was — am, scared of how you’re going to react to this.”
Summer shifted next to him, hand grabbing his sleeve, the touch careful, gentle.
He had expected her to scream at him or run away. Perhaps she was too shocked to react, her mind not having caught up to what he had just been told.
“I don’t know a lot of things.” He continued when she stayed silent, “About relationships and how to treat people properly, and I barely understand my own emotions. I… didn’t want to tell you this in the middle of nowhere… y-you would have found out eventually. Noticed that I don’t age visibly, that the car functions the way it does because I control it, seen me do maintenance on myself…”
“Look at me…” She whispered.
There was a deep frown in her face when he finally opened his eyes and turned to her again.
“I think a few weeks ago I would have asked if you were making fun of me…” She admitted. “But I have seen so many things no one would ever believe… That whole cave, with the car… it talked to me.” She repeated. “And even my mom seemed to know something about this.” She sighed, putting her hands at the sides of his face. “This is strange. Crazy even. But I… I somehow think you’re telling the truth.”
He nodded slightly, wondering how she would react if he told her the rest of this, but that was for another time.
She smiled at him, tiptoeing just slightly to kiss his cheek and then grabbed his hand to pull him along. “…So how does that all work? I’ve seen you eat.”
“It’s incredibly complicated.” He muttered, relief slowly filling him. He hadn’t expected her to be so calm. “When we’re back at the cabin I can show you some data.”
“Even though it’s classified?” She challenged.
“You don’t have photographic memory, do you?” He shot back.
A laugh escaped her. “You do have GPS in your head!”
“I do.” He couldn’t help the small smile. “I thought you were going to leave me right there…” He muttered more quietly, almost not wanting her to hear it.
She looked at him, the frown back in her face, piercing blue eyes narrowing. “Why?”
“Because of what I am.”
She shook her head. “You’re still the same person you were ten minutes ago. The guy who picked me up in the pouring rain, even though my drenched clothes got the car wet. The guy who nearly fainted when I kissed your cheek after we left that stupid movie we both hated…”
He knew she was smart, perceptive. And still he hadn’t trusted her to look past what he was. To be shown understanding for it was strange.
“I guess I should be shocked or something, or angry or whatever… but…” She shook her head. “I’m not.”
“That is relieving.” He sighed.
“Lets go back and order pizza or something. I am starving.”