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The ad still echoed in Santana’s ears. She bolted out of the office as Sue apologized. She ran to the restroom at the end of the school. Thankfully, it looked empty. Santana went into the closest stall to the door and fumbled the lock until it clicked. She sat on the cold seat and clutched her knees to stifle her sobs. Her fingernails dug in anyway. She felt like she couldn’t breathe. Her head pounded and her breathing grew faster.
She was walking with Brittany to class, both holding their black and red binders. Brittany looked ahead of her as she spoke.
“I think you should stop making fun of Finn, you’re being way too harsh.”
Ugh. Whatever. She would not grovel at his feet, especially since he told the whole school about her by shouting it in a hallway of all places.
Santana scoffed before quipping.
“Walruses are all flabby.”
Becky Jackson ran up to them. Her footsteps echoed on the tile as she spoke.
“Santana, Coach needs you in her office.”
Mr. Schue and Burt Hummel stood on either side of a red and black chair in the office as Sue sat by the desk. They all watched Santana walk in. Why they had called her, she wouldn’t know. It couldn’t be about that, even with Kurt’s dad there.
She looked around.
“What’s going on?”
Sue nodded, blue tracksuit and all. Mr. Schue had his mouth open but didn’t speak. Santana looked back at Sue.
“Sit, Santana.”
Shit. Sue always called her Sandbags. As she sat, Mr. Schue patted her back. He still wore that ugly grey sweater. Most people knew not to touch her.
Sue looked at her the whole time she spoke, unflinching.
“I have some bad news…and I think it’s my fault.”
Burt cut in, exasperated. His brows were furrowed.
“Oh, you think?”
Santana looked through the windows between the locker-lined hallways and the office. She could see students walking, but could they see her?
Sue snapped back.
“Watch it.”
She continued.
“During my campaign to become Ohio’s newest congresswoman…”
She heard Mr. Schue sit down from the sound of fabric screeching against a leather chair.
“I’ve lied.”
God, no. It couldn’t be that. She could barely meet Sue’s gaze.
Sue walked up to lean against her desk, getting closer.
“I set the tone for this run, and now we have to deal with the consequences.”
What?
Mr. Schue added on. Santana whipped her head to him at the sound of his voice.
“Santana…I have the phone number of a counselor who can help.”
Burt cut in.
“It’s something that I’ve been through…I can talk to your family.”
All because Finn Hudson got upset with her insults. Santana couldn’t believe it, so she asked.
“Wha-what’re you talking about?”
Burt spoke from behind her.
“Sue’s rival sent me his latest ad.”
He held up the tape and put it in the player.
Sue's voice grew softer as she added some details.
“His niece goes here, and she overheard a conversation between you…”
Santana met her gaze. Not about that. No.
“And Finn Hudson.”
She blinked and looked away. Sue pressed play and watched the television above.
Menacing music played. The ad showed black and white photos of Sue…and colored photos of her. Santana’s face was circled, then it showed her next to a rainbow heart, two interlocked venus signs inside. The male voice boomed: "Why did you promote a lesbian student to be your head cheerleader, and when did you plan on telling Ohio?"
She zoned out for the rest of the ad. Tears formed in Santana’s eyes as she shook her head. What would her parents say? What would her abuela say? Would being a cheerleader even provide status anymore if this was hanging over her head? Her whole plan was to hide it until college, then be with Brittany eventually.
Santana’s breath shook as tears streamed down.
“I haven’t even told my family yet.”
Sue apologized, but she barely heard it as she ran out.
She had been in the stall so long her nails had left marks in her knees. She didn’t want to face the world right now, but she had to in order to go home. She picked her binder off the floor and unlocked the door, only to be met by a familiar face in the hall.
“Britt! Um-hi.”
Brittany’s smile faded as she saw Santana’s tear-streaked face and uniform. She wrapped her arms around Santana. Did Brittany think she was drunk? Santana always cried when she was drunk. Or when she felt everyone hated her.
“Oh, honey.”
Santana leaned into Brittany’s touch. Her mouth felt dry. She just wanted to love her girl quietly, without having to deal with it all. She wasn’t ready. Brittany ran her fingers through Santana’s hair. The tension that coiled in her body loosened with Brittany’s touch. Just like that, her lips brushed against Santana’s forehead before pulling back a little bit. She didn’t want to talk about it, but she couldn’t dismiss Brittany either. How would she explain herself? She could either storm off, cry again and explain, or act like everything was fine. Santana felt caught between crying and acting like everything was normal. It definitely showed on her face as Brittany paused.
“San, I just wanted to tell you that I’m here for you. Every step of the way. You will find people who accept you no matter what because you are worth it. And if they don’t realize that, that’s their issue.”
Santana wanted to believe her words, but it wasn’t easy. Her social standing was about to crumble. What if she got beaten up? What if the Cheerios dropped her? What if she was disowned? Or worse, what if something happened to Brittany? She shook her head.
Every step of the way.
Time to be honest, for once. Santana hugged Brittany again.
“Britt…if I ever got kicked out, could I stay with you?”
“Yeah, of course.”
Brittany’s certainty surprised Santana, but then again, she was always the more open of the two. Brittany smiled.
“And…I know you can protect yourself. But you also have me, Kurt, the glee club.”
Santana sighed.
“I just want to get my mind off things. Everyone’s expectations. My abuela’s dreams of my future husband. The future, period.”
Brittany hummed in response.
“Do you want to go to Breadstix? I saw they have a shrimp deal, and Lord Tubbington loves shrimp.”