Work Text:
“You need to stop leaving dead bodies in my kitchen.”
Riz purrs and rubs up against Fabian, his thin, whip-like tail wrapping around his legs as he circles him, causing Fabian to wobble. Fabian steadies himself and grabs a plastic bag to stuff the pigeon corpse into; it’s the fourth one this week. Riz cleans himself as he watches Fabian clean up the bird, and then hops onto the table and screams.
“Hold on, The Ball! I’ll get you dinner in a minute!” A can of tuna is produced and the contents dumped into a bowl as Riz tries to shove his head underneath the falling flakes of fish, but Fabian manages to push him back, ultimately avoiding having to give him a bath. Riz attacks the tuna with fervor, loudly munching as he gobbles down the food.
With dinner complete, Riz washed his face before sauntering out to the living room and curling up in a ball on the sofa. Fabian sighs and sits down next to him, and Riz stretches and moves over to curl up on Fabian’s lap, purring away as he falls asleep.
<<Photosynthadults>>
FancyFeat: He’s been fed and he’s asleep on my lap. Send help, I can’t move now.
<attachment:cat_on_skeleton_s_lap.jpg>
TheDevilOnUrShoulder: Awww, how cute!
EyeCU: It’s not cute, Fig. That’s our friend who is under a spell!
IDoubtItsButter: Come on, cat or not, it’s cute when he balls up. Admit it!
RageAgainstTheArcanotech: Do you really need help, Fabian? I can be there in about an hour and a half. Sorry, traffic is bad at this time of day.
FancyFeat: I’m fine, Gorgug. It’s just a joke about cats sleeping on you.
RageAgainstTheArcanotech: Oh
EyeCU: Just hold tight, Fabian. We’ll get this cleared up soon. I’m onto this cunt.
~~~
Three weeks ago The Bad Kids had met up for their annual Adventuring Week, where they would pick a quest posted at the Bastion City Adventurer’s Guild to fulfill. It’s a great way to escape daily life and for the party to catch up on life. This year they decided to bring an insidious bard who goes by the moniker “The Zookeeper” to justice. The miscreant was wanted for casting permanent True Polymorph spells on victims, transforming them into various animals and then kidnapping them to create her personal zoo.
Things had been going pretty well – between Riz and Adaine, they were able to quickly find and confront her – right up until she hit Riz with her True Polymorph spell and transformed him into an olive-green Cornish Rex housecat. She ran to scoop him up but he fought back, clawing, hissing, and successfully wriggling out of her grasp before fleeing towards his friends.
“Fine! I don’t want you as part of my collection anyway!” she shrieked before teleporting away, leaving the group bewildered. To everyone’s dismay, a ninth-level Dispel Magic didn’t revert the transformation, and of course after an hour Riz still remained a cat. Meanwhile, he had immediately taken a shine to Fabian, rubbing up against him and purring, while he acted aloof and indifferent towards the rest. For this reason Fabian was automatically chosen as Riz’s keeper while the others did their best to track down the bard. And so Fabian returned to his apartment with his best friend perched on his shoulder, although not in the manner he was used to.
The first day had been rough, what with Fabian having to cat-proof his place, then finding out that Riz seemed to retain the same intelligence he had before and had figured out how to open doors and cupboards. That cleverness had led to the influx of pigeon and rat carcasses in his kitchen as Riz would open a window at night to slip outside to prowl the streets for ‘gifts’ for Fabian.
Bringing Riz back home also led to some… complications. Wanessa, the girl Fabian had been seriously dating for about two months, was highly allergic to cats and taking antihistamines wasn’t enough to abate her symptoms. When Fabian broke the news to her that he had a new ‘roommate’ for an indefinite amount of time, she immediately gave him the ultimatum: it’s me or the cat. Fabian knew where his loyalty lied, and with a heavy heart (and to her shock) he promptly broke things off with her.
Living with a cat definitely had some drawbacks. Among his more annoying habits (aside from constantly tripping him or leaping onto his shoulders without warning), Riz would keep trying to eat from Fabian’s dish, crouching on the table and lunging for his food. Fabian would have to push Riz away, but damn, he was tenacious and squirmy and each meal became a battle. But it wasn’t all terrible; if there was a silver lining to this curse, Riz was getting a lot more sleep as a cat, and he was eating better as well now that he wasn’t guzzling coffee and running on fumes all the time. He was really starting to fill out and Fabian decided he’d have to have a talk with him once this was over and set him up for some sort of food delivery program as clearly he wasn’t getting proper nutrition living on his own.
~~~
So here Fabian finds himself, alone save for the ball of fur he calls his best friend, kneading his lap and purring as loud as a motorcycle. That night, as Fabian goes to sleep (with Riz curling up on top of his chest), he wonders how much longer this will last and at what point he needs to take responsibility and take Riz to a vet for vaccinations and all the other things that go with pet ownership, even if he never would consider himself ‘owning’ Riz, nor Riz as a pet.
Also, if this spell isn’t lifted soon, they’re going to have to break it to Sklonda that her son now weighs six pounds and craps in a box.
The next morning Fabian is awoken at 5:30 sharp by Riz batting his face and screaming at him for breakfast. He pulls himself out of bed, tripping over the cat dancing between his feet as he makes his way to the kitchen. Half a mouse waits for him by the fridge, and Riz trots over and sits next to the grisly remains, beaming proudly up at Fabian.
“Thanks, The Ball. I’ll, uh, I’ll get right on that.”
He cleans up the mess and then prepares some salmon pâté cat food for Riz (he had originally wanted to feed Riz only canned tuna or chicken – people food – but when Aelwyn found out she lectured him on nutrients and balanced diets, so now Fabian feeds him only the highest-quality cat food with the occasional canned tuna (like last night)). Riz gobbles it up while Fabian prepares some peanut butter toast for himself. He bathes after breakfast (making sure to shut Riz out of the bathroom, and he gets scratching at the door and paws poking out from beneath the door as a result) before he heads out to the dance studio for morning practice. Riz tags along, of course, jumping up onto Fabian’s shoulder and perching there as Fabian walks the two blocks to the studio. Once there, Riz hops down and loafs on the floor beside the wall-length mirror, watching Fabian do his warm-ups through half-closed eyes. Eventually he falls asleep as Fabian prances around, but is awoken when younger kids come into the studio and start fawning over him. Irritated, Riz stretches and scampers away from the youths, chasing after Fabian as he twirls around with his battle silk. Attracted by the flowing silk, Riz leaps and bats at the cloth, dancing alongside Fabian as he does his best to not step on the cat. The kids go crazy and begin recording and snapping pictures, all the while cooing at how adorable the pair are.
Fabian finishes up at the studio and the two return home, Riz perched on Fabian’s shoulder as usual, and the cat takes the opportunity to nap some more while Fabian refreshes himself. Next up are errands, and Riz insists on tagging along for those as well. They go grocery shopping where Fabian gets tons of people asking if they can take a picture of him shopping with his cat on his shoulder, and then to the bank where Riz glares at and flexes his claws in an intimidating manner at the banker as if threatening him.
When they return home, Riz is all riled up to play and attacks Fabian’s feet as he walks through his apartment, tidying up. Fabian relents and pulls out Kristen’s ribbon dancer that she loaned him (specifically for playing with Riz) and taunts him with it, dangling and flicking it around so that Riz darts after it, butt wiggling in the air as he stalks the ribbon before pouncing. Fabian smiles, but it’s a sad one; yes, he’s very cute and lovable, but this is his best friend, a brilliant detective and expert rogue. It’s all wrong. He sighs and pulls out his crystal as Riz rolls around with the ribbon like a rainbow-striped serpent.
<<Photosynthadults>>
FancyFeat: He’s really feisty today. He loves the ribbon dancer, Kristen
IDoubtItsButter: 😀🥰🥰🥰
TheDevilOnUrShoulder: No pic?
EyeCU: We promised no pics of Riz like this. It’s demeaning
TheDevilOnUrShoulder: Ah poop. Fine. I get it.
RageAgainstTheArcanotech: Any luck tracking down the Zookeeper, Adaine?
EyeCU: Wherever she is she’s got wards up that prevent me from finding her, but I won’t stop trying. We’ll get Riz back to normal if it’s the last thing I do.
FancyFeat: Do you need my help?
EyeCU: You just make sure Riz is happy and healthy.
FancyFeat: 👍🏾
A paw enters Fabian’s view and Riz gently slaps at the crystal, then looks up and mews at him.
“Hungry, The Ball?”
“Mrowr.” He nudges the crystal, pushing it away, and crawls into Fabian’s lap where he flops over onto his back, exposing his soft, furry stomach.
It looks so soft, so inviting. Fabian’s been trying to give Riz some dignity by only stroking him on the back of the head, but this is the first time he’s offered his belly to him. Aelwyn had given him a crash course in cat body language, and he knows how much trust is being placed in him with this gesture. Should he? He knows what to expect, but the allure of that belly is so tempting…
Cautiously, he reaches out.
Fabian’s crystal pings, and then pings over and over again. It’s the group chat going wild, and as Fabian reaches over to check it, a puff of chartreuse smoke erupts from his lap. Riz reappears – just as he looked before he was transformed – lying on his back in Fabian’s lap, belly in the air and his arms curled up in a submissive position. Riz cuts himself off mid-purr and blinks up at Fabian.
“Fabian…?” He looks around, taking in his surroundings, and proceeds to slide off his lap to the ground. “Are we… in your apartment? What’s going on? Where’s The Zookeeper? Was I in your lap just now?”
“The Ball!” As Riz peppers Fabian with questions, Fabian drops to the floor as well and embraces Riz, hugging him tightly. Still flustered, Riz instinctively struggles and hisses, and Fabian reluctantly releases him.
“I’ve got to tell the others you’re back!”
“Back? Back from where?”
“The Zookeeper got you! She turned you into this scrawny cat, and I’ve been caring for you for the past three weeks!”
“Um… what? Three weeks?! Does Mom know??”
Fabian helps Riz off of the floor and back onto the sofa where he explains the whole ordeal to him.
“That’s… wild, to say the least. I have no recollection of it; I remember fighting The Zookeeper and then suddenly Bam! Here I am on your lap!”
“While you’ve been a fun roommate, these past three weeks have also been stressful to say the least,” Fabian admits wearily.
“So why did I turn back? Did you kill her?”
“The others must have. The group chat was going crazy right before you reverted. Let’s see…” Fabian leans over, grabs his crystal, and unlocks it.
<<Photosynthadults>>
TheDevilOnUrShoulder: Zoopkeeper sighted!
IDoubtItsButter: What, seriously!? Where?????
TheDevilOnUrShoulder: She walked into the library! Ayda’s stalking her through the aisles right now!
TheDevilOnUrShoulder: Whoa. Ayda just cast power word kill on her! It’s over!
RageAgainstTheArcanotech: Holy shit, it was that easy?
EyeCU: I can’t believe it. It was that easy.
TheDevilOnUrShoulder: <attachment:that_bitch_dead.jpg>
EyeCU: OK, cool and all, but how is Riz??
EyeCU: Fabian???
IDoubtItsButter: 👀👀👀 Fabian, you there? How’s Riz?
TheDevilOnUrShoulder: Dude’s probably got it on dnd again.
Fabian huffs in indignation: how dare Fig imply that he would put his crystal on Do Not Disturb mode when Riz’s future was on the line?? Instead of replying, however, he opens the camera app and holds up his crystal. “I’m gonna take a pic so everyone knows you’re alright, OK?”
“Yeah, that’s cool.”
Fabian snaps a picture and sends it to the group while Riz pulls his own crystal out of his pocket. He scowls.
“Aw, damn, looks like I ran out of battery. I guess even though my gear transformed with me, it couldn’t keep a charge for that long. Tell the others I’ll check the group chat when I get home and get this charged.”
Fabian looks up from his crystal, feeling a sudden emptiness in his chest. “What? You’re going already?”
Riz turns to him, annoyance written all over his face. “It’s been three weeks, Fabian! Has anyone been taking care of my apartment? I need to also talk to my mom! What about my job??” He runs a hand down his face as he groans. “Ohhh, it’s a good thing I negotiated that clause in my contract that if I go missing due to adventuring they can’t fire me!”
“...You keep your job a secret so we had no idea who to contact,” mumbles Fabian. “I’m sorry about not telling your mama. We thought we could kill The Zookeeper sooner.”
Riz sighs. “Look, I get it. Thanks for making sure I didn’t get hit by a car or get taken to a shelter or something like that. I appreciate it, I really do. But now I’ve gotta dive right back into my actual life, so yeah, I’m going. I’ll see you around, Fabian.”
He gets up and crosses the room to the front door. As he puts his hand on the doorknob, Fabian calls out.
“Wait!”
Riz begrudgingly turns his head as Fabian stands.
“Let me drive you home.”
“I live on the other side of Bastion City, Fabian. There’s a reason we don’t get to meet up very much these days.”
“It’s quicker than walking and cheaper than taking the bus. Just let me help you.”
Riz looks down for a moment and scratches his head, frustrated. “Yeah, OK,” he says with a sigh. “Thanks.”
The motorcycle ride across town is silent, and the pinpricks of Riz’s claws in Fabian’s sides as he holds on reminds Fabian of cat claws scrambling up his back and digging into his shoulders as Riz would perch on him.
Fabian watches as Riz disappears into his apartment complex, leaving him in the parking lot. At least he’s home safe. He waits in the lot until Riz’s apartment lights up and he comes outside and waves to him from the balcony. Fabian waves back and drives off. He misses him already.
Life over the next week is lonely for Fabian. He’s glad that Riz is back – he truly is – but he misses the companionship. It felt like high school all over again with Riz always sticking by his side, as best friends tend to do. Life had made them – all of them, really – go separate ways (as it usually did at that stage), which was why they made sure to have their week together every year, and just as Fabian had been growing used to the company, it was gone. Mealtimes are boring without having to fight off Riz, and he has a difficult time sleeping without the reassuring weight and purrs of a cat on his chest as he lays in bed. At the dance studio people ask him where his shadow has gone, and he doesn't have the energy to explain the whole situation so he tells them he was just babysitting a friend’s cat for a while.
At least he no longer has to clean up dead animals, but secretly he even misses those.
One night, as he flops down on the sofa, something pokes him in the butt. He digs around and pulls out Kristen’s ribbon dancer. He sets it aside to mail it back to her, and he decides that he’s had enough moping around. He gathers up the tins of cat food to donate to a shelter, intending to drop them off the next morning, and goes to bed in a bad mood. Somewhere in the back of his mind a thought floats up: just get a cat, if you miss the companionship so much, but he knows that’s not a solution. It isn’t that he misses having a cat; he misses having Riz. He grabs his crystal and pulls up Riz on the texting app. His thumbs hover over the keyboard, unsure what he wants to say.
After staring at the blinking cursor for five minutes without moving, he gives up and puts the crystal aside. He goes about his usual bedtime routine: brushing his teeth (no Riz trying to drink from the faucet), washing his face (no Riz cleaning himself on the toilet cistern), applying his lotions and creams and tucking his hair into his satin bonnet (no Riz staring at him, blinking slowly). He climbs into bed, sighs, and turns out the light. Sleep doesn't come easily (it hasn’t since Riz left), but eventually he relaxes and begins to doze.
A sharp rapping sound rouses him. Startled, he jolts up in bed and looks around, trying to figure out where it had come from. Again, a rapping noise, this time clearly from the window. There’s a shadow out there, and, curious, he leaves his bed and goes over to it. There’s a goblin crouched outside on the fire escape – Riz.
Fabian opens the window and Riz crawls inside before dusting himself off.
“...The Ball? What are you doing here? It’s… 2:15 am! And people usually use the door, you know!”
“I can’t sleep.”
Fabian rolls his eye. “That’s not new. You never sleep.”
“Ha, ha. I’ll have you know that I had been getting better, but ever since the curse was broken, I just can’t fall asleep.”
Fabian scratches at the back of his neck. “And you came to me because…”
“Because some part of my brain was screaming that I needed to.”
“So you crossed the entire city in the wee hours of the night, climbed the fire escape – again, why?? – all because you can’t sleep?”
“I didn’t know your apartment number, but somehow I knew which window was yours.”
Ah.
It clicks for Fabian, but he can’t bring himself to explain it to Riz.
“Well, if you think my luxury memory foam mattress and one-thousand thread count sheets will be more comfortable than your junky, broken-spring bed and scratchy, bargain-store sheets… you’re damn right. But you just climbed that fire escape, which means you were going through that nasty alleyway downstairs; you’re taking a shower first, mister.”
Riz grins. “Fair. And thank you.”
After the shower, Fabian loans Riz some oversized pajamas and Riz climbs into bed beside him. The light is turned off and Fabian closes his eye.
It’s awkward. He can hear Riz breathing beside him, feel him shifting and turning over as he tries to fall asleep, but after ten minutes Riz hasn’t stilled. Fabian, for all his effort to relax, isn’t having any more luck, either. Riz accidentally kicks him and mutters an apology, and for Fabian, it’s the last straw.
“C’mere,” he grunts, rolling over and grabbing Riz.
“Wha-? Fab-!”
He hauls Riz onto his chest and centers him there. “You’re used to sleeping here, that’s why you can’t get comfortable.”
“Huh?”
“When you were a cat, you used to always sleep on me,” Fabian explains with a sigh. “I think your body misses it, which is why you can’t get comfortable and sleep.”
“What? That- that’s ridiculous! I-” Riz cuts himself off as his body instinctively curls up into a ball and he begins to purr.
“...What the fuck?” he mumbles, but he’s already half-asleep.
“Just go with it, The Ball. I haven’t been sleeping well without you, either.”
“But I don’t remember…” Riz mumbles, but he trails off as he falls asleep.
Fabian feels the reassuring weight on his chest (albeit a lot heavier than normal) and succumbs to his sleep as well.
The next morning, Riz is curled up in the crook of Fabian’s arm, lightly snoring when Fabian wakes up. It’s the first time in a week that he’s felt this refreshed and as he shifts, Riz wakes up as well. He stiffens immediately as he takes in what he’s doing, and then he shuffles off to the side of the bed.
“Um… sorry.”
“Don’t be. I had the best sleep in a long time, thanks to you.”
Riz fidgets beneath the sheets. “...Yeah… me, too,” he says after a long pause.
“I’m glad you’re no longer a cat,” Fabian says. “But I’ll admit that life is a lot more boring and lonely without you.”
“What? What happened to that girl you’ve been seeing?”
“I broke up with her. Differences in priorities.”
“Oh.”
“The Ball, move in with me.”
“Um…”
“I miss you. We used to be so close in high school, but now that we’ve grown up and gone our separate ways, I’ve been lonely. I didn’t realize it beforehand, but even with Wanessa I felt it. There’s just a certain… camaraderie I get with you that no one else can replicate, and I felt it again when I was looking after you.”
“Then get yourself a pet.”
Fabian looks over at him, a little hurt.
“I would hate to think that you could be replaced so easily.”
“This was one night! It doesn't mean anything!” he says hotly, his face darkening with blush.
“Don’t tell me you don’t feel better being with me, too? You know it’s not about the mattress or threadcount. Your body knows where it wants to be.”
“...I’m not in love with you, Fabian.”
“And I’m not in love with you, either. But I do love you, if you know what I mean.”
Riz hesitates. “...You do live closer to work,” he finally admits.
“We can do a trial run, if you’d prefer. I’ll foot your rent for two months if you move in to see what it’s like.”
“Fabian…”
“I’m serious. I love you and miss you.”
“This is a lot of pressure for just waking up.”
“OK, fair enough. Let’s go have breakfast and it’ll give you time to think.”
“Do you have tuna? Lately I’ve been craving fish really badly for some reason.”
“As a matter of fact, I do.”
Riz gobbles his tuna fish sandwich with his usual gusto and then eyes Fabian’s omelet and toast hungrily.
“...Did you want something else?” Fabian asks as Riz slurps a bit of drool back into his mouth.
“I, uh… can I just have a little bite of what you’ve got there? It looks good.”
Fabian bites back a smile. “I suppose I can let you have some.”
After breakfast, Fabian gets ready for his daily walk down to the dance studio, packing his duffle bag and filling his tumbler with electrolyte water. “Sorry I can’t drive you home yet, The Ball. I’ve got my usual time reserved and I don’t want to miss it.”
“Oh, no, it’s fine. I don’t work today anyway.”
“Well, I’ve got all the streaming services you could want, or you can read a book, take a nap, hell, I’ve got some sudoku books in the bathroom if you want to solve some puzzles while I’m gone.”
“Thanks. Uh… I don’t feel like being cooped up alone, actually. …Do you mind if I join you? I’ll be quiet. It’s been a long time since I’ve seen you dance, anyway.”
Not as long as you think, actually.
“I’d love that. Come on then, it’s about time I leave.”
At the dance studio Riz pulls out a chair and watches Fabian as he does his warm-ups before he prances about the studio. When the music ends and Fabian stands there, panting heavily, Riz claps. It feels exhilarating to have him as an audience of one. The next track begins and Fabian holds out his hand. “Would you care to join me?”
Riz hesitates, and then a shy smile creeps across his face. “Fuck it, why not?” They dance. Riz has no rhythm, gyrating and grooving to his own beat as Fabian moves around him, twirling his sheet and losing himself to the music, and by the time the track ends, Riz is grinning like, well, like a cat that’s got the cream.
“That was fun,” he says, his chest rising and falling rapidly as he tries to catch his breath.
“Yes, it was,” agrees Fabian. “But my time is up. Time to head home.”
“Oh… already?”
“Well, I need to get groceries if you’d rather do that with me.”
“Yeah!”
At the grocery store, Riz can’t help but give feedback on what Fabian buys, mentioning how long it’s been since he’s had pork chops or making a face when Fabian contemplates buying asparagus.
“What’s wrong with asparagus?”
“It stinks. Get zucchini instead.”
“Oh? Is this meal for me, or for us?”
Riz goes silent.
“It could be for us,” Fabian hints
“I… I shouldn’t.”
“Why not?”
A haunted look covers Riz’s face. “...What if it ruins our friendship?” he whispers.
A warm smile creeps across Fabian’s face. “The Ball, nothing could ever ruin our friendship. So come on, say ‘yes’ and be my roommate. Just try it for two months. I guarantee you’ll sleep and eat better, at least. When’s the last time you had a home-cooked meal?”
“Does your omelet count?” Fabian eyes him. “…Alright, yeah, sure. Let’s do this.”
Yes!
“Then I’ll get zucchini. How does rice sound as the side?”
“Perfect.”
After dropping the groceries off at the apartment, Fabian takes Riz back to his place so he can gather up what he needs to move in with Fabian for the next two months, and then they return to Fabian’s place to cook up dinner.
Over the next two months, Riz fills out some and gains some extra muscle thanks to the daily walks and increase in protein in his diet. The bags under his eyes disappear and he has a spring in his step that wasn’t there before. They sleep together every night, and cook dinner together when Riz has time off from work. As the end of the trial period wears down, Fabian sits Riz down at the kitchen table to discuss their future.
“Well, what did you think of our experiment?”
Riz fidgets as if he’s being interrogated.
“I mean, it was good…”
“But?”
“...’But’ nothing. It was good. I feel good. I’m having fun.”
Fabian eyes him suspiciously. He knows Riz. “...But…?”
Riz sighs. “But what about you? You can’t have a partner if we’re like this, sharing the same bed and all that.”
“What makes you think I don’t have one already?”
“Because no one’s coming over?”
“The Ball, I mean you.”
“...Me?” He laughs, a high-pitched, nervous laugh. “Ohhhh, no, no, no! We’re-! I mean, I’m-! Hahaha, you don’t mean-!”
“Riz, I told you before. I might not be in love with you, but I love you, and having you by my side has made me realize how much I don’t want you to leave me.”
“But I can’t! I don’t want to-”
“You don’t have to do anything outside of what you’re doing now. Just being yourself. I don’t need romance or sex from you, if you’re afraid of that. I just want my best friend.”
“...Really? That’s it?”
“That’s it.”
“It’s that simple?”
“It’s that simple.”
“Then yeah… let’s make it official.”
Fabian grins, reaches over, and grasps Riz’s hand, his eye aprakling. “Thank you, The Ball.”
<<Photosynthadults>>
FancyFeat: Guess who’s officially moved in!
<attachment:moving_in.jpg>
IDoubtItsButter: Yay!
RageAgainstTheArcanotech: I’m so glad for you two! I’m sorry I couldn’t make it to help with the move.
FancyFeat: Don’t sweat it, Gorgug.
EyeCU: Next time I’m in BC I’ll stop by!
TheDevilOnUrShoulder: Same! You guys make the perfect couple!
FuckItWeBall: Thanks, guys.
FuckItWeBall: Did we mention we’re also getting a cat?