Chapter Text
“Eye movement, detected.” Comes a robotic female voice.
That was the first thing Ryland Grace heard when woke up on the Hail Mary with no memories. He has officially been alone, awake, for three months.
He remembers some things, like his mission, and why he's in space. And obviously his name and the fact that he's a teacher. He doesn't really remember his dead crew mates, but he held a small funeral for them before he launched them into space.
Then he met Rocky! It's been so amazing to not be completely alone in space, but Rocky isn't human…
Grace was about to go to bed due to a reoccurring headache when he heard a loud bang on the door connecting the two ships.
Grace frowns and walks over to the door, opening it, expecting a gift from Rocky… only to find Rocky himself in a hamster ball.
“Hi Grace!” Rocky says, making his excited jazz hands.
“Y-you're in a ball.” Grace says, astonished.
“So Rocky no die in Grace atmosphere! I come up!” Rocky starts to walk up the ramp, shoving past Grace and running into the ship.
Grace chases Rocky through the ship while Rocky excitedly narrates everything. It takes twenty minutes to calm Rocky down and explain boundaries. Of course Rocky doesn't care, but honestly as long as he's calm Grace doesn't really mind.
“Alright, Rock. I'm going to sleep. My head is killing me.”
“Killing? New word, question? New word. What mean? New word.”
“Uh, it's an expression. It just means that I have a headache and it hurts incredibly bad.”
“Why head hurt? Question. Did Grace receive head injury? Question.”
“No, it's just something that happens to humans sometimes. There's not really any particular reason, but I need to sleep to help it go away.”
“Rocky watch Grace sleep. Statement.”
“Alright, bud. Just please remember to be quiet.”
“Yes. Rocky be quiet for Grace friend.”
Grace nods and grabs his blanket that got thrown around in the chaos. That's when he sees it. A small chest that he's never noticed before. It has a big “R” on it and lots of star stickers.
Grace stares at it for a long moment.
“Grace okay? Question.”
“Uh… Yeah. I just found something that I haven't noticed before.” Grace crouches down in front of the chest. He runs his fingers over the “R”, something vaguely familiar about it.
His fingers find their way to the latch and Grace finds himself opening it. It opens with a soft click. He's instantly hit with the scent of coffee and Mama's perfume.
Mama.
Mama.
“Grace leaking. Why Grace leaking? Question.” Rocky's voice calls from behind Grace, but his mind is too far away to answer.
Grace reaches forward with a shaky hand, picking up the piece of folded paper on top of all the clothes and soft things.
“Dear Ryland. I know you're probably very mad at me and you have every right to be. But I know Yáo and Olesya will take amazing care of you. You're such a good boy and I'm so proud of you. You can do this. You're smart. I believe in you… Love, Mama.★” There are dried water spots on the bottom, like someone cried while writing it.
Grace is hit with a sudden memory.
"Why are you avoiding me?” Eva asks, blunt, straight to the issue.
Grace feels his throat close around the words bubbling up in his throat, the tears threatening to spill finally falling onto his sleeves. “Because I called you Mama!” Grace blurts. “Oh no. Word vomit.”
“...That is what you are upset about?” Eva huffs out a laugh, barely there, but there nonetheless.
Grace's head snaps up at her laugh. Why is she laughing? She's laughing at him. God he's such a screw-up.
“Ryland, I am not understanding why you are upset about calling me “Mama”. You were regressed, you have no control over what you saw me as. At that moment a Mama is what you needed, and so that's who I became.”
Grace stares at her, more tears streaming down his cheeks at her bluntness. He very much appreciates it at this moment. It grounds him enough to finally speak again. “Y-you're not-not upset?”
“I see no reason to be.” Eva simply shrugs… like it's no big deal. Because she doesn't see it as one.
“Y-you-you don't see less of me?” Grace whispers, almost afraid of her answer.
“Dr. Grace. You are literally the smartest man in the world. Why on Earth would I think less of you merely because you are classified as a Little?”
Before Grace realizes it, he's on the floor, sobbing, curled into the fetal position. He's screaming and clawing at his face. A meltdown, part of him realizes.
Somewhere in the background of his mind, he hears Rocky's frantic movements and scared questions. Grace can't answer right nowait everything is too much. He wants his Mama.
“Grace! Grace hurt?! Question. Grace! Grace looks at Rocky! Rocky fix!”
Grace doesn't answer, he continues to scream and sob, pulling on his hair. He's overwhelmed and Rocky's voice isn't helping. He screams, slamming his head into the ground.
Something soft is shoved under Grace's head and it shocks Grace enough to open his eyes and look behind him. Rocky somehow grabbed one of Grace's stuffed animals and put it under his head to keep Grace from hurting himself.
“Soft Earth animal help? Question.” Rocky asks softly his front leg tapping the ground to enunciate his question.
Grace sobs again, grabbing the stuffed bear, blue with yellow stars, and pulling Teddy closer and hugging him.
It takes Grace almost two Earth hours to calm down. Rocky was patient the whole time, he quickly realized that talking was overwhelming Grace so, Rocky stayed mostly quiet. Only making soft trill sounds.
“Grace better now? Question.”
Grace stares at the floor, now in an upright position with his knees to his chest. He shakes his head. He feels numb, fuzzy. He wants Mama. “Wan’ Mama.” He slurs, his tongue feels heavy.
“Mama? What is Mama? Question.”
“...Mama takes care o’ me. She makes me feel bet'er. And she-...” Grace's expression falls. “...Mama sent me to space. She-... She didn't want me.” Grace chokes out a sob.
“...Rocky can be Grace Mama. Statement.” Rocky says firmly. “Rocky won't send pebble Grace to space ever again.”
Grace laughs wetly and wipes his nose on his bear. “Rocky can't be Mama. Rocky's not a girl. Can be Papa. Papa take care of pebble Grace. On Earth I'm called a Little. It means that sometimes my mind turns to pebble age while my body stays adult age.”
“Rocky can be Papa! Is male term for Mama? Question.”
“Yeah… I miss my Mama, Rocky… She promised that everything would be okay… and then she sent me away…”
Grace is hit with another memory.
“What's wrong?”
“...I just feel bad being able to be Little and feel safe when some family out there just lost their son, husband, father, cousin, whatever DuBois was to them…”
“...Yes, I understand that.”
“...What are we going to do about Project Hail Mary? Lift off is in three days.”
Eva goes silent for a long moment. “I will figure it out. I just- I need you to-” Eva starts to stutter, for the first time in her life she has no idea what to do.
Carl suddenly speaks up. “Ry, I think Stratt needs you to be Little more than you need to be Little. You know that sometimes Caregivers need to take care of someone?”
Ryland blinks, like it just suddenly occurred to him that Eva might need this just as much as he does.
Eva glares at Carl, but she knows he's right.
“...Mama needs me too?” Ryland whispers, his voice just so soft, so small.
Eva's brain immediately switches to Caregiver mode and she pulls Ryland into her lap. “Yes, yes, of course I need you, liefje.”
Ryland buries his face in her neck, wrapping his arms around her torso. His hands are cold from the ice pack.
“No need to worry, Little Star. Everything will be okay.” Eva whispers.
“She called me her Little Star…” Grace whimpers.
“...Why? Question.”
“...Cause I like the stars. Its all over my clothes and stuffies.” Grace mumbles.
“What do stars look like to humans? Question.”
“Um… you know how I said that humans can see through our eyes due to light reflectors?” Grace rubs his face, the scientist in him coming out.
“Yes! Rocky remember!”
“Well, cause of the way light hits our eyes it branches off. So when we look up at the stars at night, it looks like this.” Grace draws a quick star, making sure to color it in so rocky gets the full picture.
Rocky points his invention at it and looks at his small pad thing that shows him the shape so he can use his echolocation. “Is pretty shape! Statement.” Rocky exclaims.
Grace nods. “Its how humans see the stars from Earth. When in space, though, we see them how you see them.”
Rocky makes a soft chittering noise of confirmation, his version of a nod.
Grace rubs his eyes. He's so tired… his brain wants to melt through his ears.
“Grace need sleep? Question.”
Grace nods and struggles to stand. He uses Rocky's new hamster ball to help him stand. He rubs his eyes and stumbles to bed. He hates this bed, it's so uncomfy.
Rocky follows Grace to the dormitory and makes sure he doesn't fall. Grace lays down, rolling around a bit to get comfortable, and pulls his blanket to his chin.
“Grace sleep now. Rocky watch.”
Grace lets his eyes fall closed, he has a feeling tomorrow won't go well.