Chapter Text
[XIAHOU DUN LOGGED INTO EDO WARRIORS]
[GLASSES LOGGED INTO EDO WARRIORS]
[DOZAEMON LOGGED INTO EDO WARRIORS]
[GINKO LOGGED INTO EDO WARRIORS]
[XIAHOU DUN ENTERED YOROZUYA CLAN ROOM]
[GLASSES ENTERED YOROZUYA CLAN ROOM]
[DOZAEMON ENTERED YOROZUYA CLAN ROOM]
[GINKO ENTERED YOROZUYA CLAN ROOM]
[YOROZUYA CLAN ROOM IS SETTING IS THE YOROZUYA APARTMENT]
GINKO : Is everyone here?
XIAHOU DUN : I think so?
GLASSES : We only have four members so obviously everyone is here.
DOZAEMON : Don't you two have to study?
GLASSES : Says the one who has college entrance exams in 2 weeks!
GINKO : Calm down Pachi, you only get to live once so let DOZAEMON play.
XIAHOU DUN : Says the 28 years old cafeteria worker.
GINKO : Don't insult cafeteria workers! Do you have any idea how much pleasure it is to eat parfaits everyday?
GLASSES : Aren't you supposed to be 'selling' not 'eating'?
GINKO : One bird, two rocks.
DOZAEMON : Isn't it 'One rock, two birds'?
XIAHOU DUN : Aren't we going to play? I upgraded my sword yesterday to level 5. It now has a 'power absorbing spell'.
GLASSES : You played yesterday? Didn't we decide not to play on Sundays?
GINKO : It was an emergency meeting, you see. So we just played with the people who were here.
GLASSES : 'Who were here' meaning 'everyone except me.'
GINKO : Oh my god Pachi, calm down. We have bigger problems.
DOZAEMON : Right. There's a new clan that is suddenly uprising. Looks like they got a new member.
GLASSES : What's the name?
GINKO : SHINSENGUMI
GLASSES : Didn't they have good fighters before?
XIAHOU DUN : Yeah, that SOUKO. I was just a few attacks away from defeating the bitch until she used the power regression spell. They are suddenly gaining more power.
DOZAEMON : I think it's because of their new member MAYORA-13.
GINKO : Yeah. I think so too. They were just 'attack' only before but it looks like they got a 'strategist'.
GLASSES : So what's the plan?
GINKO : Today we have the auction. So let's see how they move and tomorrow we'll attack one of their TERRITORY.
GLASSES : OK
XIAHOU DUN : OK
DOZAEMON : OK
[XIAHOU DUN LEFT YOROZUYA CLAN ROOM]
[GLASSES LEFT YOROZUYA CLAN ROOM]
[DOZAEMON LEFT YOROZUYA CLAN ROOM]
[GINKO LEFT YOROZUYA CLAN ROOM]
[XIAHOU DUN ENTERED KABUKI-CHO AUCTION]
[GLASSES ENTERED KABUKI-CHO AUCTION]
[DOZAEMON ENTERED KABUKI-CHO AUCTION]
[GINKO ENTERED KABUKI-CHO AUCTION]
[KABUKI-CHO AUCTION SETTING IS THE KARAKURI-DO (GENGAI'S SHOP)]
3 minutes later
[GORILLA ENTERED KABUKI-CHO AUCTION]
[SOUKO ENTERED KABUKI-CHO AUCTION]
[ROBOZAKI ENTERED KABUKI-CHO AUCTION]
[MAYORA-13 ENTERED KABUKI-CHO AUCTION]
2 minutes later
[GORILLA LEFT KABUKI-CHO AUCTION]
[SOUKO LEFT KABUKI-CHO AUCTION]
[ROBOZAKI LEFT KABUKI-CHO AUCTION]
[MAYORA-13 LEFT KABUKI-CHO AUCTION]
2 minutes later
[GINKO LEFT KABUKI-CHO AUCTION]
[GLASSES LEFT KABUKI-CHO AUCTION]
[DOZAEMON LEFT KABUKI-CHO AUCTION]
[ XIAHOU DUN LEFT KABUKI-CHO AUCTION]
1 minute later
[ROBOZAKI ENTERED KABUKI-CHO AUCTION]
3 minutes later
[ROBOZAKI LEFT KABUKI-CHO AUCTION]
[XIAHOU DUN ENTERED YOROZUYA CLAN ROOM]
[GLASSES ENTERED YOROZUYA CLAN ROOM]
[DOZAEMON ENTERED YOROZUYA CLAN ROOM]
[GINKO ENTERED YOROZUYA CLAN ROOM]
GLASSES : They just left without purchasing anything.
XIAHOU DUN : RIGHT! What are we going to do now?
GINKO : Calm down, we'll just attack as planned tomorrow and if things turn bad we bail out with minimum damage.
DOZAEMON : I really can't help but feel nervous.
XIAHOU DUN : It's alright! Since I upgraded my sword if they use any special spell I'll absorb it.
GINKO : That's a good plan. Then see you guys tomorrow then. BYE
GLASSES : BYE
XIAHOU DUN : BYE
DOZAEMON : BYE
[XIAHOU DUN LOGGED OUT OF EDO WARRIORS]
[GLASSES LOGGED OUT OF EDO WARRIORS]
[DOZAEMON LOGGED OUT OF EDO WARRIORS]
[GINKO LOGGED OUT OF EDO WARRIORS]
Meanwhile in the SHINSENGUMI CLAN ROOM
[GORILLA ENTERED SHINSENGUMI CLAN ROOM]
[SOUKO ENTERED SHINSENGUMI CLAN ROOM]
[ROBOZAKI ENTERED SHINSENGUMI CLAN ROOM]
[MAYORA-13 ENTERED SHINSENGUMI CLAN ROOM]
[SHINSENGUMI CLAN ROOM IS SETTING IS THE SHINSENGUMI CAFETERIA]
MAYORA-13 : What happened?
ROBOZAKI : They left as soon as we left. Just like you said.
SOUKO : Not bad. Meaning they too didn't purchase anything.
MAYORA-13 : They are the top 1 clan. I'm sure they have plenty of upgraded weapons. But from what you guys said it looks like they concentrate on player stats a lot.
GORILLA : Especially DOZAEMON, GINKO AND XIAHOU DUN strength lvl is 10 and they also have weapons.
ROBOZAKI : Last time we fought them SOUKO was able to defeat XIAHOU DUN by using the 'power regression spell'. But DOZAEMON launched a surprise attack and we lost.
MAYORA-13 : Whose their healer?
SOUKO : GLASSES
MAYORA-13 : Wizard?
GORILLA : They don't have one as far as we know. But GLASSES uses a lot of spells.
MAYORA-13 : Since they have player stats it's not going to be easy but all our weapons are currently lvl 10 so there must be something we can do.
MAYORA-13 : So as planned we attack with weapons and weapons only except GORILLA and when I find an opening I'll attack GINKO and take her down
SOUKO : That sounds good. If the leader falls they are sure to panic
MAYORA-13 : ROBOZAKI did you upgrade the arm cannons?
ROBOZAKI : Yes
MAYORA-13 : Don't use them on the other players. Keep it for the final attack on GINKO
ROBOZAKI : OK
MAYORA : GORILLA at my signal will 'ultimate smash' close to the 'FLAG'.
GORILLA : OK
MAYORA-13 : That's all then see you guys tomorrow. BYE
SOUKO : BYE
ROBOZAKI : BYE
GORILLA : BYE
[GORILLA LOGGED OUT OF EDO WARRIORS]
[SOUKO LOGGED OUT OF EDO WARRIORS]
[ROBOZAKI LOGGED OUT OF EDO WARRIORS]
[MAYORA-13 LOGGED OUT OF EDO WARRIORS]
(The next day 08:05)
ALERT : [YOROZUYA CLAN TERRITORY A IS UNDER ATTACK BY SHINSENGUMI CLAN]
ALERT : [YOROZUYA CLAN TERRITORY A IS UNDER ATTACK BY SHINSENGUMI CLAN]
ALERT : [YOROZUYA CLAN TERRITORY A IS UNDER ATTACK BY SHINSENGUMI CLAN]
ALERT : [YOROZUYA CLAN TERRITORY A IS UNDER ATTACK BY SHINSENGUMI CLAN]
ALERT : [YOROZUYA CLAN TERRITORY A IS UNDER ATTACK BY SHINSENGUMI CLAN]
[XIAHOU DUN LOGGED INTO EDO WARRIORS]
[GLASSES LOGGED INTO EDO WARRIORS]
[DOZAEMON LOGGED INTO EDO WARRIORS]
[GINKO LOGGED INTO EDO WARRIORS]
[XIAHOU DUN ENTERED YOROZUYA CLAN ROOM]
[GLASSES ENTERED YOROZUYA CLAN ROOM]
[DOZAEMON ENTERED YOROZUYA CLAN ROOM]
[GINKO ENTERED YOROZUYA CLAN ROOM]
XIAHOU DUN : What the hell is happening!?
GINKO : Why the hell are they attacking at 8am!?
GLASSES : No time to shout among us here! Let's attack before they take TERRITORY A (TERRITORY A is Otose's Snack Bar — Yorozuya Down Floor)
DOZAEMON : Let's go!
[XIAHOU DUN ENTERED YOROZUYA TERRITORY A]
[GLASSES ENTERED YOROZUYA CLAN TERRITORY A]
[DOZAEMON ENTERED YOROZUYA CLAN TERRITORY A]
[GINKO ENTERED YOROZUYA CLAN TERRITORY A]
SOUKO : Incoming!
MAYORA-13 : ROBOZAKI
ROBOZAKI : I got it!
(ROBOZAKI and GORILLA are destroying the level 10 tables while SOUKO is standing outside to guard. MAYORA-13 is behind the counter waiting for a surprise attack)
(YOROZUYA CLAN members arrive in front of the YOROZUYA CLAN TERRITORY A)
(XIAHOU DUN immediately attacks SOUKO)
XIAHOU DUN : I'll take my revenge for what you did last time!
SOUKO : Give it your best shot!
(XIAHOU DUN and SOUKO fight outside and taking this chance GINKO, GLASSES and DOZAEMON enter YOROZUYA CLAN TERRITORY A)
(As soon as they enter ROBOZAKI launches bullet attacks with his hand guns while GORILLA continues smashing the tables and collecting GOLD)
(GLASSES charges forward and attacks using the 'rusting elixir' which had always worked against ROBOZAKI but a surprise attack appears from behind the counter)
(MAYORA-13 shoots right at ROBOZAKI's right butt and he explodes along with GLASSES)
[GLASSES STATUS : DEAD]
[ROBOZAKI STATUS : DEAD]
(GINKO charges at MAYORA-13)
GINKO : Did you really just blast your own member!
MAYORA-13 : Ultimate goal is to win. Casualties are not my concern
GINKO : I see. THEN DIE!
(GINKO bolts an attack on MAYORA-13 which he escapes)
(GINKO swipes her sword at MAYORA-13 which he dodges)
[ROBOZAKI REVIVES]
(GINKO chases behind MAYORA-13 and he runs away)
GINKO : Stop running away, you coward!
MAYORA-13 : Does it say in the rules 'not to run'?
GINKO : No it doesn't but you can't win without defeating the other side.
MAYORA-13 : Who said I need to attack to win?
GINKO : You really are an annoying piece of shit!
(GINKO launches a heavy attack but ROBOZAKI blocks it with his arm cannons)
GINKO : Where the hell did you come from? And so fast!
[ROBOZAKI STATUS : DEAD]
GINKO : And he's dead again!
MAYORA-13 : Sayonara
(MAYORA-13 splashes 'melting mayonnaise elixir' at GINKO)
(GORILLA who was fighting DOZAEMON launches 'ultimate smash' and YOROZUYA CLAN TERRITORY A; FLAG breaks)
[ GLASSES REVIVES]
[GINKO WAS KILLED BY MAYORA-13]
[YOROZUYA CLAN WAS DEFEATED BY SHINSENGUMI CLAN]
[SHINSENGUMI CLAN TAKES OVER YOROZUYA CLAN TERRITORY A]
XIAHOU DUN : "......."
GLASSES : "......."
DOZAEMON : "......."
[GINKO STATUS : DEAD]
Gintoki, "AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!"