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The eyelids of the girl sunk in deep sleep fluttered when from the direction of the kitchenette came first a loud crash, then a string of curses. She yawned; her round, tanned arms shot up as she stretched until something cracked in her joints. Still half-asleep, she sniffed curiously. The pleasant smell of strong coffee hung in the air and Marlene finally sat up on the bed, rubbing her puffy, sleep-filled eyes with her hands. She reached for her phone and checked the time. A groan of protest escaped her lips when it turned out it wasn’t even nine yet.
“You’ve got to be kidding me,” she mumbled, throwing herself back onto the bed. She growled something when someone unceremoniously smacked her bare ass. “Get off! It’s the damn middle of the night!”
“It’s nine,” Sirius laughed. He was in suspiciously good spirits for someone who’d gone to bed well past five in the morning and who had never, at least not once since she’d known him, gotten up before eleven. They opened the tattoo parlor at noon sharp and Sirius usually rolled out of bed only a quarter of an hour before, threw on some random pieces of clothing, ran his fingers through those incredible locks of his and was ready to go conquer the world.
Marlene hated him for it deeply. She could spend three hours in front of the mirror and still not look half as good as he did, even if he’d just rolled out of bed. Even now, holding a cigarette in one hand and a mug of coffee in the other, with tangled black curls around his striking, pale face with strongly defined cheekbones, he was absurdly attractive. She gave up trying to bury herself under the pillow and finally rolled onto her back, putting her hands under her head simply because she genuinely liked looking at him.
“And so what if it’s nine? It’s the holidays, baby, we’re not working for the next week.”
“I told you I have to be somewhere.”
“At a family dinner.” Marlene ran her hand over his bare back, up to his neck, tangling her fingers in his long, silky hair and pulling his head down. He took a drag of his cigarette and pressed his lips to hers, and she inhaled the smoke deep, all the way into her lungs. When they broke apart, a thread of spit still gleamed between their lips. “A family dinner is a family dinner, you’re not signing an attendance sheet there. You can be late. If you came back to bed, we could…”
“Marl.” Sirius stubbed out his cigarette in the half-drunk coffee and, naked, walked to the wardrobe, carelessly pulling out a few items of clothing to throw into an already packed large suitcase. There was that same steel tone in his voice as always when he’d made up his mind, and Marlene rolled her eyes. No matter how naked and tempting she was right now, she knew he wasn’t coming back to that bed. “If you want, go back to sleep. You have the keys. Just lock up behind you when you leave. I have a plane to catch in less than two hours. There might not be an attendance sheet, but I wouldn’t miss this for anything.”
***
Unlike many teenagers at odds with their parents, Sirius didn’t have any spectacular escape from home behind him. He didn’t run away from it, he just didn’t go back - after finishing the semester at Harvard, he and James were picked up from the station by the latter’s parents and Sirius almost fainted with relief when he found out he could finally live with them.
“But my mum… And Reggie…” he still couldn’t believe it, swallowing nervously, and Euphemia Potter pulled him to her with that same protective gesture as over the last five years, even though he was already a head taller than her.
“Thanks to the fact that you kept going back there for the last two years, we managed to gather enough evidence to prove extreme neglect of duty toward you and abuse with particular cruelty. Your parents had to choose between fighting for custody of you or having charges brought, so…”
“I can guess what they chose.” Sirius smiled like he was mocking, but there was bitterness lurking in the corner of his mouth and James awkwardly patted him on the back.
“Come on, buddy, the important thing is that you can stay with us. You know damn well that mum and dad love you more than me anyway.”
“What can I say, I’m amazing.” Sirius was only teasing out of habit, because his eyes were still serious. “And Regulus?”
“Regulus was taken in by your cousin Andromeda. Of course you’re welcome there too whenever you finish your studies. But for now, it’ll be easier for you to live with us. Though of course, if you want to be with your family…”
“You are my family.” The bitterness disappeared when Sirius finally returned the hug. James’s mother had suspiciously wet eyes as she herded them both into the car with her arms.
Ever since that day, spending the holidays at the Potters’ had become a tradition for Sirius. Every year - no matter what part of the world he happened to be in and no matter what he was doing - he dropped everything to make it back to London on time. It was only last year that he broke the tradition. Not by choice: he’d just broken himself skiing and spent the holidays almost entirely in a cast, in some Swiss hospital. The recovery was painful, long, and he still hadn’t regained full mobility. He had no intention of ever looking at skis, alpine slopes, or Switzerland again for the rest of his life. He had the money from the trust fund he’d inherited when he turned twenty-five, Marlene had the business plan and the vision. In less than eight months their tattoo studio was not only no longer running at a loss, it was bringing in enough decent income that they could start thinking about opening a third branch. On top of that, Marlene was funny and sweet, and the sex was great and Sirius was at that stage in life where he liked it just fine and thought he wouldn’t change a thing about it. Maybe except for getting closer with Regulus.
When Andromeda had taken him in, their contact had almost died out. Sirius hadn’t seen his brother in three years, though they exchanged messages often. Sometimes Sirius even sent more than just memes, and Regulus didn’t just reply with gifs. They were making progress, especially since this year they were finally going to meet. Andromeda had invited Sirius over and he was going there the day after tomorrow at the latest. Truthfully, he couldn’t wait. Reggie was already of age and Sirius had been toying with the idea for a while that if his brother agreed, he’d offer for him to come live with him. Life in a small Welsh village somewhere at the end of the world might have been fine for a child, but what could a teenager do there, besides herding sheep? Sirius had no idea, and Regulus was enthusiastic about the whole idea. Especially since apparently Andromeda’s daughter had recently had a baby, so a wedding was expected soon and perhaps the young married couple would want to live there. Regulus was more than willing to give up his room to them. Life in a big city with a laid-back brother was tempting.
***
After landing, Sirius had another coffee in the small, obscenely expensive bistro at the airport, ate a hot dog, smoked a cigarette, and rented a car. At first he’d planned to order an Uber, but he decided he’d just drive to Andromeda’s first thing in the morning; he’d spend a few days there, give Reggie time to say goodbye, and then they’d go to the Potters’ and at the end of the week they’d drive back to the airport and catch a flight to London.
It was a good plan. Fleshing it out, Sirius forgot that the easiest way to make God laugh is to tell Him your plans. Maybe if he’d remembered that, he wouldn’t have been so surprised when everything went completely differently than he expected.
James’s hug was just as strong as always. Sinking into the arms of his best friend, who was even closer to him than his own brother, Sirius couldn’t stop the blinding smile that only dimmed a little when he saw how downcast James was.
“Jamie, you look like shit.” Sirius pushed his friend to arm’s length and looked him over critically. A shadow of worry flickered in his eyes. “Something with your parents? Harry…?”
“Hey, hey, no, no one’s hurt, everyone’s fine and healthy,” James reassured him. He took his crooked glasses off his nose and wiped them with that same nervous gesture as always. Sirius had seen him do it all through college, when they’d passed a tough exam, or crammed finance all night. Funny that after finishing law school James had actually opened his own firm, while Sirius ended up with a tattoo parlor. He’d actually enjoyed university, because he was smart enough that he learned and absorbed knowledge instantly, so while others spent their time studying, he was usually having fun, but did he really need the degree? Well, it looked pretty nice framed on the wall. Like it was laughing in the face of the system that was no use to him at all.
“So what’s wrong?” Sirius nudged James in the side as the other helped him unload his luggage. “I can see it.”
“Ech, man, what’s even right?” James asked with discouragement, shrugging. “Come inside. Lily didn’t want to say anything over the phone, but I guess there’s no point avoiding the topic anymore. We’re getting a divorce,” he said straight up, and Sirius, who was just pulling a heavy suitcase out of the car trunk, dropped it on his foot.
“Fuck,” he cursed, kicking the suitcase and wincing when his injured leg hurt even more. “Prongs, what the hell did you do? Divorce? From Lily? You’re crazy about that girl!”
“You think I don’t know that, for heaven’s sake?” James ruffled his already messy hair, pressing his lips into an ugly grimace that Sirius had never seen on him before, because James Potter had the energy of a golden retriever, not a ruffled crow. “Turns out, buddy, that sometimes love isn’t enough. Can you believe that?” he mumbled and Sirius shrugged.
“I don’t even believe in love,” he said and put an arm around James. “Damn, kids, what did you do?”
***
Lily was waiting for them inside, with the baby in her arms. At the sight of Sirius, Harry first hid timidly in his mother’s arms, then peeked out curiously from behind her elbow, burying his face in her long, red hair.
“Hi, Siri.” Lily’s hug was strong and warm when they greeted each other. Harry blinked when he suddenly found himself in the arms of that slightly forgotten, dark-haired uncle, and giggled when he was tossed in the air. Lily’s drawn face brightened when her son burst into a shrill laugh, tugging now at Sirius’s long curls instead of her hair. "How is it that he doesn’t see you for a year and still seems to know exactly who you are?”
“He’s my best mate.” Sirius tickled his godson’s belly and the kid laughed like crazy, wriggling in his arms like an eel. He settled little Harry more securely on his hip and kissed his forehead. Under the dark fringe was a thin line of scar, shaped a little like lightning.
When Harry was barely a year old, someone had broken into James and Lily’s flat. They weren’t supposed to be home all evening, but they’d come back early because Harry had colic. When Lily, holding her son in her arms, walked into the apartment, a man with a gun suddenly stood before her. With a cry she turned to shield the child, but the bullet, going through her raised arm, reached Harry. Luckily it only grazed his forehead, which all the doctors present at the surgery agreed was a miracle. The boy had almost died and Lily had never forgiven her husband for not being with her then, and instead, in some stupid show of bravado, going after the burglar. Because even when he managed to knock the gun out of his hand, someone else came down from upstairs. A former school friend of James and Sirius, a Peter, who’d never done well in college and who’d always been kind of on the sidelines. Peter, who’d been to their house and who’d helped plan the break-in for some guy because he owed him money… The day Tom Riddle and Peter Pettigrew went to prison with sentences of at least twenty-five years each was the first day Lily slept soundly and the first day she let her husband touch her again.
Sirius had really hoped they’d managed to get past that crisis, but apparently he was wrong.
“I got a job offer I couldn’t refuse at a military research facility.” Lily nervously wound a strand of hair around her finger, watching as Sirius cradled Harry in his arms. She smiled briefly when her son burped after eating and threw up on Sirius’s extravagant and presumably expensive shirt, and he didn’t even blink, just efficiently wiped the baby’s face and hugged him back to himself. “It’s a once-in-a-million opportunity, but I had to sign a full secrecy agreement. We’ll be locked in the lab for at least three months. Twice that long we’re not allowed to contact the outside world.”
Lily was a microbiologist and had been working with the army for a long time. She worked on neutralizing threats related to pathogens that could be used as biological weapons. Everyone knew, though no one said it out loud, that she’d probably also been involved in creating them; she was a valued scientist and now it turned out just how much. Sirius wasn’t surprised they’d offered her this prestigious job, because she was brilliant and talented like almost no one. He was just surprised she’d accepted it. What kind of mother decides to leave her child for at least six months? With a protective gesture he pulled his godson closer to himself. His own mother hadn’t been good at that role and Sirius had a deeply developed compassion for children who’d been failed by their parents. And abandoning them he definitely considered that.
“Don’t look at me like that.” Lily curled up in her chair and took a sip of wine. “I knew what I was getting into when I signed the contract with the army. I was aware they could call me up someday. The fight happens on many fronts, not just the battlefield. I’m not leaving Harry alone. James will take care of him. And his parents. If it weren’t for the fact that you live more than three hundred kilometers away now, I’d say he has you too.”
“Of course Harry has me, Lils, but…” Sirius sighed and patted her calf. “It’s hard to blame James for not understanding your decision.”
“I don’t expect him to understand.” Lily shrugged. “You see, Siri, that’s the worst part: we don’t expect anything from each other anymore, not for a long time. Only fulfilling our duties toward Harry. Our marriage is already gone, all that’s left is family.”
“And that’s not enough? Family?” Sirius tried to understand it, but he couldn’t.
“Of course it is. But my work matters for protecting millions of families in this country.” Lily set down her empty wine glass. “It won’t last forever, I’m not disappearing for good. I’ll just be gone six, eight months at most. Harry didn’t forget you after a year.”
“I’m not his mum.” Sirius looked sadly at the sleeping boy. “Do what you have to, Lils, but promise me you’ll come back as soon as possible.”
“I will.” Lily was silent for a moment, then held out her arms and took her son to put him in his crib.
“Lily.” Sirius stopped her, lowering his voice. “But why divorce right away? You said yourself it won’t be that long. Maybe you could still work things out. Isn’t that a last resort? This divorce could wait until you get back.”
“It wouldn’t be fair to James. I made my decision and I can’t deny him the right to go his own way. Or to demand that he wait for me, not knowing if we’ll make it or not. If we’re meant to make it, we will. If not… who knows. A lot can happen in six months. He might meet someone who can give him what I couldn’t.”
“Or maybe you’ve already met someone you want to give something like that to.” James appeared on the porch, holding a bottle of beer; it was obvious it wasn’t his first of the evening. “Did she tell you?” he smiled cynically, raising the beer in a mocking toast. “That Snape is going to be her boss?”
“Severus is my friend.” Lily gave him a cold look. “Which is more than I can say about you these past few weeks. Goodnight, James. Sirius. I’m leaving tomorrow morning, I have a lot of things to sort out. Take care of Harry. I never would have agreed to leave if I didn’t believe he’d be in good hands.”
***
Lily really did leave early in the morning. James’s parents were sad, Harry was fussy, and for several days in a row James got blind drunk every evening.
Sirius gave up the idea of a quick departure, torn between worry for Regulus, who was waiting for him impatiently, and his duty toward his godson. In the end it was James’s parents who suggested a solution that could be good for everyone.
“Take James with you, son.” Euphemia sighed as James, like every day, put his son to bed and then sat on the porch with a bottle of whiskey. “A change of scenery will do him good. Everything here reminds him of Lily, and when they go back with Harry to their house, it’ll be even worse. Because of Lily’s contract, the army arranged a long-term parental leave for James with very good financial security negotiated. At least he doesn’t have to worry about money, and he’s in no shape to run the firm right now, oh no. My husband has already decided to come out of retirement for a few months and take over the practice. We’ll try to arrange everything so he’s not overburdened. And you take him far away from here. Let him think about something else, have a bit of fun. Your cousin won’t mind, will she?”
“I don’t think so. And even if she does, there’s probably some B&B there where we could stay for a bit.” Sirius actually liked the idea. After all, it was Wales! He’d been dreaming of seeing Cardiff ever since he was a teenager and binged all the seasons of Torchwood in one sitting and learned what a dick was for. Strangely, he hadn’t been jerking off to the image of Captain Jack Harkness, because Ianto Jones had done it for him more. What charisma that guy had! He still had a dozen favorite fanfics on his Kindle. Sirius smiled at the thought that maybe somewhere in Cardiff his own, slightly nerdy Ianto was waiting for him.
“You might be right, mum number two,” he said. “Time to pull James out of the swamp he wants to throw himself into. We’ll leave the day after tomorrow, I’ll call the girl I work with right away and tell her I’m extending my vacation a bit. After all, I haven’t had one in a year. Tell dad to return the car, I rented it at the airport, have someone pick it up. Can we take one of the cars?”
“Of course. Besides, Sirius, in all this we forgot to finally tell you about your birthday present. It’s not for another month, but it’ll come in handy right now. It’s waiting for you in the garage.”
***
Sirius’s present turned out to be a stunning Aston Martin DBX 707. Sirius was ecstatic at the sight of this automotive miracle and even James perked up as they looked under the hood together and ran around the gleaming car like excited kids. Harry didn’t really know yet what they were so excited about, but he laughed happily along with them. For the first time since Lily left, there was a wide smile on James’s face. He didn’t reach for a bottle either, nor did he take one for the road, which Sirius took as a good sign.
“Jesus Christ, I’m having an orgasm just listening to this engine.” Sirius smoothly backed the automotive gem out of the driveway, pulling onto the road. “What a car! Parents must be insane to give me a present like this, it must have cost a fortune.”
“You know our family is rich, and they’ve never skimped on us.” James checked that Harry was properly strapped into his car seat and handed him a pouch, which his father’s true son immediately smeared all over himself. He babbled something happily, clearly enjoying the ride, and James put a cartoon on for him on a tablet, then climbed over the seat to the front, taking the place next to Sirius. “Okay, so how long do we have, what does Google Maps say? Four hours, not bad. I’ll take over halfway. And now tell me, buddy, what’s up with you. Lately you never had a minute when I called. And a female voice answered your phone more than once. Unless you’ve started talking in falsetto…”
“No, that’s my business partner. Marlene. I’m telling you, that girl has her head screwed on right, she runs our whole business.”
“And I guess that head is on a pretty nice neck too, if she’s answering your phone at two in the morning?” James grinned and Sirius saluted him casually. “Bloody hell, Padfoot, do you have to be like the proverbial sailor and have a girl in every port? At Harvard more than one cried her eyes out over you…”
“Or more than one cried his eyes out,” Sirius corrected him innocently and James sighed, putting a hand over his heart.
“Don’t even remind me of that bloody Gilderoy,” he groaned. “That was the most self-absorbed, pretentious, narcissistic bastard I’ve ever known!”
“And that’s saying something, since as long as I can remember they’ve been saying that about us.” Sirius laughed, pulling designer sunglasses out of the glove compartment and sliding them on. The car handled like a dream and driving it was pure pleasure. If all went well, they should get to Andromeda’s house around two, which would give them enough time to get a feel for the situation. If Tonks’s husband and her family were living there too, they’d just look for some B&B to stay at for a few days. Further plans were still unformed: James had muttered something about maybe finally visiting him in London and Sirius actually liked that idea. As soon as they got back he’d probably throw himself into work to catch up a bit, so James and Regulus could help each other out: one with childcare, the other with sightseeing.
“But Gilderoy Lockhart is really an embarrassing entry on your list of conquests, Siri.” James was crunching nuts and for a moment he didn’t look like a man whose wife had abandoned him to work for six months with her former lover in some facility cut off from people.
“He had a brain the size of a peanut, but something else was appropriately sized,” Sirius replied and James threw a pistachio at him.
“Do you have any shame?”
“Have you met me at all?” Sirius winked at him and for a moment lowered his glasses to glance at his friend from under his lashes. “Have you forgotten that I tried to hit on you too?”
“Eyes on the road.” James didn’t even comment on that awkward dance they’d done around each other somehow in their first year of college, when after one of their drunken parties they ended up in bed together. They’d been so drunk that nothing came of it, except that Sirius threw up on James’s shoes while trying to take his pants off, and James, jumping back, punched him in the nose and they had to go to the ER to get the break set. That was even worse than Gilderoy.
They got to Cardiff ahead of schedule, though neither James nor Sirius were really speeding; maybe they would have been if they were alone, but there was Harry in the back seat and both of them had that in mind. Unfortunately, almost as soon as they left the city, it started to rain. As long as they were on the asphalt road, everything was fine, but the way to Andromeda’s house led down some dirt roads, which soon turned into soggy clumps of earth in the downpour. Sirius’s new car was great, but maybe not for these conditions. First the engine howled like it was in competition with Harry, who was already bored with the trip and started screaming for no reason at all, and then they suddenly realized they were stuck when the wheels just spun in place. James got out of the car to check the terrain and immediately sank to his ankles in mud. The pouring rain didn’t help; even if they only had about a ten minute walk to his aunt’s house, marching in this weather with a child in his arms…
“Stay with Harry, I’ll go.” Sirius was frantically tapping at his phone, making strange gestures with his hand. “Fuck, man, there’s no damn signal here. I didn’t think there were still places in the world with no signal. But if I go straight down the road…”
“Have mercy, there isn’t even a road here,” James reined him in. He pulled Harry out of his car seat and sat him on his lap. The boy immediately stopped crying, reaching his arms out to Sirius. As soon as he took him, he clenched his fists in his long curls and sighed, hugging himself to him in a tight grip. There was no need to say anything, because both James and Sirius were thinking the same thing. Harry missed his mother, and Sirius’s long curls reminded him of her hair.
“In that case I guess we have to wait until this cloudburst calms down a bit and it clears up enough that we can see again.” Sirius turned on music from his phone and pulled a pack of diapers out of the bag James’s mum had packed. “And now it’s time for the smelly part of life with a child, you’d better hold your nose.”
It didn’t clear up until a few hours later, and by then dusk was already falling. Sirius took Harry in his arms and went to show him the nearby little woods, while James walked around the car once more, to confirm again that there was no way they were getting out of here on their own. Someone was going to have to help them. Most likely someone with a tow truck. Or at least a tractor.
Right when he’d thought that, a tractor came around the bend. The huge wheels handled the soft ground without trouble and James waved, squinting in the glare of the headlights. The driver blinked them to show he’d seen him and the machine stopped. A young man, probably not much older than him, jumped out. He was wearing mud-splattered jeans tucked into tall boots and a faded t-shirt. On his head was a worn-out hat, sitting there probably just out of habit, because there wasn’t much sun in this strange place anyway.
“Stuck, huh?” he asked knowingly. “Nice car, but it won’t handle our roads in this weather. Even I had trouble getting out of the field, and my wheels are ten times bigger than yours.”
“Funny, that’s the second time today I’ve heard about how size matters.” James laughed at the expression on the stranger’s face. “Sorry, bad joke.”
“Hilarious,” the stranger commented with a stone face, but he winked at him and James chuckled. Country boy or not, he had a sense of humor. “If you help me, I’ll hook you up to a tow rope. But first I have to drive to my house, because mum’s probably dying of worry, I disappeared for the whole day. From our farm there’s a normal asphalt road, so you’ll be able to drive wherever you want without any problem.”
“Works for me. We just have to wait for… oh, speak of the devil.” James waved in the direction Sirius and Harry were coming from. Sirius was carrying Harry on his shoulders, and the boy was telling him something animatedly in his funny, childish babbling. Every so often Sirius would throw in a few words in his low, melodic voice.
James noticed that the stranger looked a little too long at Sirius’s hard, muscular stomach, which showed under his t-shirt when he raised his arms to hold Harry. Sirius’s low-slung pants revealed a bit of sharp hip bone, from which dark lines of tattoo ran. You couldn’t see the rest of the design, it ended right at his collarbone. A quick flash of hunger appeared in the stranger’s eyes. James was sure he would very much like to see the whole tattoo. James smiled discreetly. Well, Sirius was hellishly attractive, he knew that well. Even if he himself didn’t look at him that way, he hadn’t missed the looks other people gave him.
“Where have you been?” he shouted when Sirius handed him his son and Harry immediately enthusiastically shoved a bunch of flowers, crumpled from being squeezed so long in a small, sticky hand, into his face. “Umpf, thank you, darling.” James spat out a few petals and Sirius burst out laughing. Tucked behind his ear, standing out bright against his silky, dark curls, was a yellow flower.
“We found a beautiful field of flowers nearby and Harry was so delighted that I had to pick him a few. Strange, they don’t look like wildflowers.”
“Those are daffodils.” The stranger’s voice was a little choked; when James glanced at him, he saw a trace of a blush on his sunburned cheeks. “The national flower of Wales. I grow them in the field.”
“So I stole your property.” Sirius smiled and reached for the flower, handing it to the stranger with a slight bow. His movements had that lazy grace he moved and danced with. When his fingers brushed the other man’s battered hat, he tucked the daffodil behind the turned-up brim. “They’re beautiful. They suit you,” he added in a quieter, more dreamy voice and James couldn’t help watching his best friend with bated breath, flirting effortlessly and on autopilot. And he probably didn’t even realize what effect his words had on the stranger, who was looking at him with darkened eyes. Their hands almost touched when he raised his hand, brushing the delicate, yellow petals of the flower. Master seducer in action. James felt like pulling out a pen and starting to take notes.
The moments moved lazily, like flies trapped in thick syrup, until finally the man shook himself and laughed softly, with more certainty now reaching out his hand and touching his hat in a gesture of greeting.
“Nice to meet you, guys.” His gaze, like it was searching for something, skipped between James and Sirius to rest on Harry. The flash of hunger in his eyes disappeared, replaced by cheerful politeness. “You too, little man. I’m Remus. And you?”
“Harry,” Harry replied proudly. He didn’t pronounce “r” clearly yet so his name sounded more like “Ha-awwy,” but Remus repeated it gallantly and Harry beamed. “And that’s daddy,” he added, pointing at James. “And father,” he added, tugging at a strand of Sirius’s hair.
True, Sirius was his godfather, but the kid didn’t mention that. And James, who could have clarified it, was busy wiping the yellow pollen off his son’s hands because Harry was starting to sneeze. Meanwhile Sirius was just looking at the stranger with a mysterious half-smile. He probably hadn’t even heard his godson’s words. Remus returned the smile, making sure it was as indifferent as possible. The stranger he’d met on the side of the road was the most beautiful man he’d ever seen, but he apparently also had a husband and a son, so Remus intended to admire him only from afar. He took one last greedy look at the tattoos covering his forearms. For the first time in his life he had such a strong urge to tear someone’s clothes off, to see him, to know him, to taste him… He bit his lip, stepping back and pulling his hat lower over his forehead to hide his face.
“I’ll hook your car up to the tow and we can go,” he said in his normal voice of a kind farmer. “You only have to look at those clouds to know the rain hasn’t said its last word here today.”
***
Remus’s farm was nearby and indeed a proper asphalt road ran from it. James had intended to just thank him for the help and set off to Sirius’s cousin, but a short, plump woman came out to greet them. She had worried eyes the same light amber color as her son’s and the same soft, wavy brown hair.
“You’re finally here, I was starting to worry,” she said with relief, hugging her son. She laughed when she saw the flower resting on his hat. “I thought daffodils had already lost their appeal for you, with how much you deal with them.”
“Their beauty struck me again today.” Remus returned his mother’s hug and waited until James took Harry out of his car seat before going over to them with Sirius. “I met this city trio on the road. They almost got properly buried at the Four Pines.”
“No wonder, that place is like quicksand in this weather.” Hope Lupin’s sharp eyes took in the two men and the adorable toddler, who was looking at her curiously from his father’s arms. “Hello, little one, I’m Hope. Do you want a cookie?”
“Cookie! Yes!” Harry beamed, kicking his chubby little legs impatiently in the air. When James set him on the ground, he immediately ran toward Hope, and she caught him skillfully before he fell.
“Adorable little boy,” she praised him fondly, looking at James. “My grandson is not even a year old, I’m already scared of what it’ll be like when he starts running around corners like this.”
“You have to have eyes in the back of your head, and even that’s not always enough, because kids are faster than us.” James looked at the woman with sympathy. “The grandson must be a pretty child, if he looks like you.”
“And like his dad,” Sirius added. His posture became a bit more withdrawn when he looked at Remus and his gaze slipped away, wandering over the surroundings. “Oh, what beautiful ironwork!” he noticed with delight, walking over to the gate. He ran his long, slender fingers over the intricately bent metal. “What exquisite craftsmanship,” he said in amazement. His eyes lit up when he saw the metal trellis with climbing vines and tiny ivy leaves rendered in every detail. “God, this is gorgeous,” he whispered with such sincere admiration that warmth filled Hope’s chest as she looked at her son with pride. He stood motionless, and on his face, as he watched Sirius’s greedy delight, appeared an expression of longing.
“This is my Remus’s work,” she said with motherly pride and Sirius’s eyes, as if pulled by a magnet, focused on her son.
“Beautiful, Remus,” he said quietly, like he was sharing some secret known only to the two of them. Remus’s eyes widened as he returned his gaze with almost helpless admiration. Then he cleared his throat, smiling briefly and dropping his eyes.
“It’s nothing,” he said, shrugging. “I do it in my spare time.”
“This is not ‘nothing,’ Remus, this is incredible, masterful precision. Real artistry!” Sirius brushed his fingers over the cool metal once more and Remus once again succumbed to the charm of that graceful gesture, watching his hands with some underlying tension. “Believe me, I know what I’m talking about. I work in a tattoo parlor and I’d be more than happy if you’d sketch a few of your designs for me. These patterns are wonderful, on one hand fairytale, ethereal, and on the other there’s this ruthless, continuous cyclicality of composition. I think you underestimate yourself.”
“Or maybe you’re overestimating me for no reason.” Remus stepped back, humiliated by the words that had escaped him. God, he was so messed up. This man was saying such nice things to him; complimenting his work, and all he could think about was how beautiful this man’s stormy grey eyes were and wonder how soft his dark curls were. What would it feel like to run his fingers through them? That kid, Harry, had grabbed those black strands in his hands and Remus was jealous. He was jealous of a little boy who’d touched his father’s hair. A father who was in a relationship and had a child with someone! Remus felt like the worst person in the world. What sounds does Sirius make when he’s kissed? What’s he like when you fuck him?
“Come in for tea, boys!” His mother’s voice cut into his thoughts and pulled him out of the rabbit hole he was sinking deeper into. He flinched like he’d been whipped, caught in the act of staring; he touched the brim of his hat with his fingers, jumped into the tractor and was gone. He didn’t come out of the garage until they’d driven off - and then he stared for a long time in the direction of the hill behind which their car had disappeared.
***
It seemed like everyone came out to meet them - Regulus, Andromeda, and her daughter with the baby. At the sight of the guests the boy showed no enthusiasm at all, just blinked sleepily with big eyes, scrunched up his little nose, and went right back to sleep in his mother’s arms.
“Hi, you must be Sirius. And you’re probably James. And this is little Harry.” The girl greeted them. James noticed there was some resemblance to Sirius in her, though she was much more down-to-earth than his friend. She looked like she stood firmly with both feet on the ground, which couldn’t be said about Sirius, who walked like he was dancing and often smiled like he saw things invisible to others. Meanwhile the boy standing next to her had completely Sirius-like cheekbones and a similar grey eye color; he in turn seemed largely defensive and James wondered if it came from innate distance or shyness around people he didn’t know well yet.
“I’m James, your cousin is right,” he said, letting Sirius take Harry in his arms and greeting Regulus. Instead of a greeting he just got a quick look from those clear, slightly slanted eyes. Little prince! While Sirius carried himself with the grace of a true prince, his brother was more like a delicate young lady who was so suffocated by the tight corset of what was proper and other people’s expectations that she almost forgot to breathe. “I’m a friend of Sirius’s. These are my parents…” And suddenly James cut off when his brain finally caught up with his mouth. In the dark eyes of the boy who’d been silent until now appeared a flash of hostility.
“Yeah, I know, it’s your parents who pulled us out of the land of misery and led us to paradise when our parents turned out to be shit,” he said in a sharp voice and James sighed.
“Bloody hell, I really don’t think before I speak sometimes,” he noted with remorse. “Sorry, Reggie.”
“My name is Regulus.”
“And that can’t be shortened?” James asked in surprise, getting another unfriendly look. “Reggie sounds friendlier. Though I guess you’re not very friendly,” he continued carelessly, again with his brain-mouth filter off. “And the last time we saw each other you were maybe five. You were such a sweet kid,” he sighed and a muscle in Regulus’s jaw clearly twitched. He gave James one last furious look, then turned sharply and marched into the house. The door slammed behind him like a cannon shot and James smiled sheepishly when everyone looked first at it, then at him in surprise.
“Today’s youth.” He spread his hands. “So sensitive!”
“Reg is five years younger than you, you idiot.” Sirius narrowed his eyes, looking at his friend suspiciously. “What did you say to him?”
“That he was a sweet kid?” James replied innocently. Andromeda had trouble suppressing a laugh.
“He’s exactly at that age where you’re too old to be a kid and too young to be an adult. He’s twenty, but he’s spent most of his life in the middle of nowhere. Your brother isn’t a very sociable person, Sirius. Sometimes you have to force him to go anywhere. I don’t know if it’s a good idea, taking him to London.”
“Andy, you said it yourself, he’s twenty. He’s not a child anymore.” Sirius moved away from Tonks because Harry kept trying to reach for his cousin’s baby. “See? This is a child. Regulus is just a grumpy gnome. He’s always been like that. Maybe London will shake him up a bit. Because our family home, well - it definitely didn’t help.”
“I really don’t want to speak ill of your parents, so I’ll just refrain,” Andromeda muttered. “You know my sister reminds me a lot of them. Bellatrix. When our parents died, they divided the estate equally between the three of us: me, Narcissa, and Bella. Bella contested the will, and then took everything from us because her husband is some lawyer from hell. I was even glad when she took it and disappeared. Narcissa married well, Ted and I successfully opened a restaurant chain and a riding school. We can’t complain about lack of money. And Bellatrix has already blown through the family fortune and wants more. Apparently she dropped by to visit your mother recently.”
“Bitch against bitch, maybe they’ll take each other out and we’ll have peace.” Tonks returned Andromeda’s protest unflinchingly. “Come on, mum, you think that too. Anyway, come on, boys, you probably want something to eat? We were expecting you much earlier, that damn weather held you up, huh? I’m surprised your little car even managed on our roads… or rather, lack of roads.”
“We had help.” James offered to carry the baby for her, which she accepted gratefully, stretching her arms. They all settled on the porch at an oak table. Andromeda’s husband, Ted, came over too. “A remarkably picturesque man with an even more picturesque, almost fairytale name pulled us out of the mud and poor Sirius almost lost his head for him,” he added in a theatrical whisper. Tonks giggled, and Sirius gave him a nasty look, rocking aggressively in his chair in a way that defied the laws of physics as he somehow kept his balance and managed not to tip over. Sirius had the grace of a cat.
“Go to hell, Prongs,” he advised him and James shook his head with fake sadness.
“I went, but they didn’t want me there,” he replied smoothly and this time even Andromeda burst out laughing. “Anyway, our savior with broad shoulders and so tall I had to stand on tiptoes to look at him has this amazing name: Remus. I immediately noticed how wonderfully it fits with another name we know, Sirius and…”
“Remus? Remus Lupin?” Tonks looked at him in surprise. “But that’s the father of my child!”
There was a loud crash. James didn’t even have to turn around to know that Sirius had finally tipped over his chair.
***
Andromeda didn’t want to hear about them looking for some B&B. It turned out there was plenty of room to sleep here. On the grounds was something like a guest house, which on two levels had six beds, and also had its own plumbing and shower. Harry slept soundly upstairs in a travel cot, and James looked uncertainly at the silent Sirius. His usually carefree, laid-back friend looked like a hail cloud.
“Siri, I only…” he tried and got a look that made him flinch. “Come on, Padfoot, you can’t be mad at me forever!”
“Want to find out?” Sirius’s eyes were throwing lightning. “I lost my head! For my cousin’s husband! Great introduction, really!”
“That wasn’t my best performance, I admit.” James sighed humbly. “But hey, we don’t know if they’re married. Actually Tonks only said ‘father of my child.’”
“As if that changes anything.”
“Well it does for me,” James noted. “Lily is the mother of my child, which doesn’t mean I’m her husband. Or at least not for long.”
Sirius pointed a finger at him. “This is the last time I’m letting you use the abandoned poor soul card,” he declared and James immediately brightened.
“It stands,” he promised solemnly. “But you’re not angry anymore?”
“A little,” Sirius admitted, though the anger had left his face, replaced by dejection. “But it’s my fault, really, I made an idiot of myself. I really liked that guy. And the way he looked at me… I don’t know, I thought he liked me too.”
“As bad as that bodes for the mother of his child, I thought so too,” James assured him. “That he likes you. He couldn’t take his eyes off you. If he could, he would’ve thrown you on a bed of those daffodils and not blinked that he was ruining them. At least now we know why he didn’t make a move, and more, why he bolted at the first opportunity. He was probably afraid he wouldn’t be able to keep his hands off you. Besides, Siri, you supposedly have a girlfriend…”
“Marlene and I aren’t exclusive.” Sirius threw himself on the bed, leaving unpacking for tomorrow. “I never promised her anything like that, or demanded such promises from her. We talk well and work even better, but it’s more like…”
“Friends with benefits?”
“Acquaintances who sometimes fuck,” Sirius corrected. “Regulus and I are more alike than people think. I don’t have many friends either. Except for one asshole who can manage to embarrass me in front of people spectacularly and his wife, who apparently saw through his nasty character and ran off to a military facility inaccessible to others…”
“Too soon!” James howled and threw a pillow at him. “Way too soon, you vile creature.”
“We’re even,” Sirius agreed. “By the way, Jamie, do you really think she’s got something going on with Snape?…”
“I have no idea.” James shrugged. “Does it even matter? I know Lily. And you know her too. You know that once she’s made up her mind, there’s nothing that can make her change it. She really believes in this whole idea of fighting for the country. And I know people like that are respected, but that’s on the TV screen, right? Soldiers who are never home because they’re fighting on the front. And she’s doing that too, in a way, but we - me and Harry - we stayed here. And that’s already a lost battle. I don’t know. I guess it was never really good between us after what happened with Peter…”
“That rat!” Sirius clenched his fists. “Really, Jamie, how did you not kill him right there on the spot…”
“I ran after him, but I heard Lily’s scream. And you know what I didn’t hear? Harry crying. For a moment I thought he was dead. That I’d lost him. And I know Lily thought the same. It lasted so short, maybe ten seconds, before she fell on him and saw that he was breathing - but that one moment was enough for me to lose her. For us to lose each other.”
“I’m sorry. I always thought you and Lils… that it was forever. I don’t believe in love, Jamie. But in you? In you two I did.”
***
Tonks hadn’t slept much that night. During dinner, from a few half-sentences and cut-off phrases, she’d found out what Lily had done. And James was doing so well with the kid… and his parents had promised help…
When it started to dawn outside, Tonks finally made her decision. The fact that she’d gotten pregnant with Remus was the result of a stupid one-night stand. He hadn’t been with anyone in a long time, and she finally wanted to try sex. She hadn’t even planned a life with Remus, because Remus was inextricably tied to this area, to the village she hated and to the lack of prospects. He’d once been completely different. He’d had dreams, like her. He wanted to get out of here and he’d finally managed to escape. He’d studied in Beijing, in Copenhagen, worked as an architect in Toronto. All those names sounded so delicious, tasted so exotic on her tongue, that because of them she’d fallen in love with the man who talked about them. Remus had tasted the big world, which she so greedily wanted to know. And then his father had a stroke and before the ambulance could get him to the hospital, he died. Remus’s mother was left alone, with a huge mortgage that had to be paid off and with a farm on land she loved and didn’t want to leave. Remus - good, noble, altruistic and always thinking of others first Remus - immediately quit his job and came back here, to this backwater village. Yes, he earned well - as an architect he worked remotely, creating designs for the biggest firms in the world… but for her that meant he was stuck. Tonks abandoned her dreams of leaving with Remus without much regret and decided to leave on her own. Aunt Narcissa gladly agreed to help her. After Draco’s birth she probably felt a bit lonely in France - Uncle Lucius held the position of consul at the diplomatic post there - and both of them warmly invited their niece to them. From the new year Draco was supposed to go to preschool, and Narcissa could start going out again. The company of her niece, whom she’d always liked very much, was extremely convenient for her.
And then Tonks found out she was pregnant. For a long time there was nothing to show. She’d always been thin and even during the pregnancy she managed to maintain her figure. It didn’t even occur to her that she was carrying a child - after all, they’d used a condom, they weren’t that stupid. And yet, condoms that were effective almost a hundred percent of the time failed and Tonks had never before hated being the exception to the statistic so much. She found out she was pregnant when she suddenly fainted. She was five months along. They kept her in the hospital because she had a hemorrhage. It turned out she had gestational diabetes and had an increased risk of preeclampsia. Before she could process all of that, her parents arrived, and after them Remus with his mother. And everyone promised her help. They said she wasn’t alone and assured her how happy they were. Her mum was so excited she was going to be a grandma. Remus’s mother hugged her carefully, tenderly. Remus, initially as shaken as she was, told her quietly that he would marry her. Aching, stunned Tonks accepted the proposal and somehow it became common knowledge that she was going to have this baby.
Even if the thought crossed her mind to terminate it, fate decided otherwise. Little Teddy Lupin was born in the twenty-fourth week of pregnancy, when his mum still didn’t know what she thought about any of this and mentally was barely smarter than he was. Remus put an engagement ring on her finger, and she took it off almost immediately, making excuses that her hands were swelling. When Teddy cried, she cried with him. She had no milk, so when it was decided to keep him in the hospital as a preemie - she went home with relief. It was her parents who went to see their grandson and it was them who brought him home. When she finally took him in her arms, Tonks looked at this little being who had been brought into the world with her participation and was surprised, and even a bit worried, that she felt nothing for him. She didn’t love him. She didn’t hate him. This child - her child - was completely indifferent to her.
Only four months after the birth was she finally allowed to get out of bed. She kept putting off the wedding, coming up with one excuse after another. If she hadn’t been so occupied with herself, she would have noticed that Remus wasn’t insisting on the wedding either. Yes, he loved his son and both he and his mother insisted they could take him in when Tonks wasn’t able to care for him, but not once was there a proposal that she move in with her future husband. She never even thought to do that. It suited her that the child was far from her. Now she took him in her arms every so often. She’d even grown to like the little boy to some degree; she felt toward him a detached, shallow fondness, like you have for a kitten born somewhere in a country barn, knowing you’re not taking it with you when you go back to the city for winter. And maybe if the alternative had been that the child would be left alone, Tonks never would have decided to leave. She was selfish and spoiled, but she wasn’t fundamentally evil. She wouldn’t have left a child to die. But when she realized others would take care of him better than she herself was able to…
And yet, even though she didn’t feel she was doing anything wrong and she’d rationalized her decision, Tonks didn’t decide to tell anyone about it. Before the sun rose, she slipped quietly out through the back gate, took the bike she’d hidden there earlier and rode to town. She had nothing with her but her phone and a charger. At the station she got on a bus that would take her to London, and from there she intended to take a ferry to France. Aunt Narcissa didn’t know about her pregnancy, and even less that she’d had a baby and Tonks preferred it to stay that way. When she stepped onto land in Calais, setting foot on French soil, for the first time in months she felt free.
***
While Tonks was enjoying her newly acquired freedom in France, in the village near Cardiff pandemonium broke out. Andromeda discovered her daughter’s escape when she found a letter slipped under her bedroom door. She read the first line and ran to her room, but Tonks had been gone for a long time. Ted went to the station and was sent away empty-handed. Yes, a girl who looked like Tonks had been seen at the station, but no one knew exactly where she’d gone or why. She hadn’t bought a ticket at the counter, so she must have bought it earlier. Andromeda and Ted, stunned by their daughter’s behavior, completely lost their heads. Andromeda was calling all her friends, trying to pick up any trace of where she might have gone, and Ted drove from one place to another with the same zero result. Screaming Teddy was unceremoniously shoved into Regulus’s arms and told to change the baby, then feed him and put him to sleep.
Regulus wasn’t devoid of feelings; on the contrary, because of his own childhood he had the same compassion for all children abandoned by their mothers as Sirius, but while he managed the first two tasks, he failed completely at the third. Teddy had no intention of stopping crying and left alone with the screaming baby Regulus banged on the guest house door, then almost threw Teddy into the arms of sleepy James. Because Teddy was still screaming, Harry immediately started screaming upstairs too. Regulus felt like joining them.
Sirius came downstairs, holding his godson in his arms.
“What the hell, Reggie,” he said in amazement and Regulus threw his hands in the air. How, how was this suddenly his fault?
“It’s your fault,” he accused James, who looked like a giant question mark. “Because of all that talk about your wife and how well you manage with Harry on your own, Tonks quietly made a break for it and ran off. Who knows. Maybe she decided that since Sirius likes Remus, they can raise this kid together.”
“Huh?” James was clearly struggling to connect the dots this early in the morning. “What are you talking about?”
“Wait, what do you mean she ran off?” Sirius, strangely completely calm in all this chaos, somehow managed to sit Harry in his high chair, handed him a peeled banana cut into pieces and turned on a cartoon, then took the screaming Teddy from James and wrinkled his nose when he caught the smell of poop. “You didn’t even change him?”
“I did!” Regulus was close to stamping his foot. “He peed.”
“Apparently he’s done a poop now. Give me the diapers.” Sirius efficiently cleaned Teddy up, and the baby finally tired himself out crying and calmed down, lying in Sirius’s arms quite peacefully and only tugging his hair now and then. Regulus looked at his brother with involuntary admiration.
“You’re like some kind of baby whisperer or something,” he said honestly and Sirius gave him a self-satisfied half-smile.
“You screamed even worse,” he pointed out. “And Harry can scream like a banshee when he doesn’t like something. I’ve got practice.”
“Does your soothing work on adults too?” Regulus shifted uncertainly from foot to foot. “Because Andromeda and Ted have completely lost their heads, and on top of that someone has to tell Remus about everything, right?”
“No problem,” Sirius confirmed absently and then flinched. “Christ, what am I saying. Reggie, do we at least know where she bolted off to? And for how long? Maybe she’s planning to come back soon?”
“Probably not.” Regulus handed him Tonks’s letter, which Andromeda had shoved at him along with the baby. Tonks informed them laconically that she was leaving, that she’d let them know when she arrived, and that they shouldn’t worry about her, and should direct any protective feelings instead toward Teddy, because she was an adult and knew what she was doing. Sirius snorted when he read that part.
“She knows what she’s doing, right,” he muttered. “I don’t even know what I’m doing, and here she is, the little brat’s already figured it out.”
“Maybe she has.” Regulus narrowed his eyes, thinking hard about something. “Are you really planning to raise this child together with Lupin?”
His brother looked at him in a way that made him feel faint.
“Have you lost all your marbles and completely lost your mind?” Sirius asked, though his gentle tone of voice strongly contrasted with his words. Little Teddy, nestled in his arms, murmured something sleepily to himself. “Just stop creating ridiculous fantasies and go get the car. Someone really should tell that poor guy that the mother of his child has shown the same level of maturity as the child.”
“I don’t have a driver’s license.” Regulus frowned and took a step back just in case when Sirius moved to take the keys from him and hand over the baby. “Are you crazy, he’ll start crying again.”
“And you’re not staying with Harry either, because he’ll start crying?” James asked knowingly.
Sirius growled something under his breath, snatching the car keys from his brother.
“Just get out of my way. How is it that in just five days, that’s how long it’s been since I left London, I’ve gotten myself into such a mess? I have no idea what I’m supposed to do with all of this. And even less why it’s me who feels like I should do something about it.”
***
Remus couldn’t get the gorgeous guy he’d met the previous day out of his head. His name was Sirius. A beautiful, unusual name. No other would have fit him so well. Driven by a sudden impulse, he pulled from the bottom drawer a portable drive that had been carelessly tossed in there, one where he kept his old designs. Had Sirius been serious when he said he’d like to use them? If those designs could be of use to him, Remus wanted to offer them without hesitation. Only were they good enough? Or had he just been saying that out of politeness?…
“It’s beautiful, Remus. I think you underestimate yourself.” Jesus Christ, just the memory of that voice, with the smoothness and timbre of honey, made him hard. And he blushed thinking about those words. Could someone completely foreign really, so easily and effortlessly, look right into the depths of him? With just a few words he’d exposed and brought out into the world that core of Remus’s being that never valued itself. Was that why he’d buried himself in this God-forsaken Welsh village, where no one knew him and no one judged him? Was that why at the first opportunity he’d fled the city, left behind the career he’d been fulfilling himself in and where he proved something to someone every day, so that he’d never have to feel inferior again by accident?
He flinched when his mother’s light, gentle hand touched his shoulder.
“He could be for you, Remus. But he isn’t,” she said and Remus realized with shame that he’d mindlessly typed Sirius’s name on the computer screen. His mother looked at him with such enormous understanding that he hid his face in his hands. “My poor, poor child. On one hand I’m glad someone finally got through to you, and on the other I deeply regret that you had to meet him on your path. You know you have your duty toward Tonks. And little Teddy.”
“I know, mum.” Remus stood up abruptly. The drive, tossed back to the bottom of the drawer, rattled deep in its depths like it was mocking him. “You don’t have to tell me what duty toward someone is. If you’d agreed to sell this damned house, this bottomless pit, at the very beginning, none of this would have happened.”
He regretted those words the moment they left his mouth. His mother looked at him for a long time, and he, humiliated and angry, couldn’t look away from her.
“You’re right. Parents shouldn’t bring children into the world and think that just because of that they have the right to expect anything from them. I’m sorry, darling. I acted selfishly, and you acted foolishly. You shouldn’t stay here with me. You don’t belong to this place. You never did. I was lying to myself that you were fine here and that you’d find yourself in time, when you were suffering every single day. Only this boy… but he’s not for you, Remus. You know that.”
“I know that,” Remus said with stiff lips. A car horn sounded from outside the window and he stood up, moving mechanically, like a robot. “Someone’s here. I’ll go see what it’s about.”
“Probably the water bill.”
“Probably,” Remus agreed.
And when he went outside, the man he desired and whom he should never have met was standing in front of the house. He was holding his son in his arms, who was opening his toothless little mouth in a loving, adoring smile and tugging his hair. Their eyes met over the child’s head and Sirius took a step toward him, and Remus stepped back. He immediately realized how stupid that was and clenched his jaw, then carefully took Teddy from him.
“What the hell are you doing here with my child?” he asked helplessly. Sirius’s grey eyes today were the color of the sky right after a storm and Remus swallowed. If it were only physical attraction, only desire, he could handle that. But in Sirius’s eyes there was still that understanding - and that damned admiration, which made Remus want to immediately go and prove to him that he was worthy of all those good things this man thought of him. Even if he risked failure in doing so. “Don’t look at me like that, for god’s sake. You shouldn’t look at me like that. Like I mean something. Like I could be something. I can’t! Not for you.”
“I know.” Sirius tenderly stroked the sleeping child’s dark hair and pulled his hand back, though his fingers tingled with the urge to touch the father’s cheek too. “You already know my first name, but perhaps we should start our acquaintance with my last name. My name is Sirius Black and the mother of your son, Nymphadora, is my cousin.” And just like that, as if he hadn’t just turned Remus’s world upside down and then made it cease to exist for a moment, he added something else. “And now be a good host, Remus, and invite your ordinary neighbor inside, because that’s not all I have to tell you. Hello, Hope,” he added, addressing his mother. “And you’ll probably want to hear this too.”
***
Six years later
The factory-white sedan, now quite dusty, bounced cheerfully along the country road, driven by a steady hand where the GPS signal pointed. On the driver’s lips, a thin man with an unattractive but intelligent face, sat a slightly mocking smile. Lily, sitting next to her husband, shot him an angry look.
“Severus, I’m inclined to think that you’re enjoying all of this,” she noted and Severus Snape smiled even wider. “Bloody hell, exactly, right? Are you enjoying my misfortune?”
“As it happens, since we’ve been married, your misfortune is also my misfortune, and since I’m not a masochist…” Severus shrugged. “What amuses me is rather the concept of this bizarre situation we’ve found ourselves in. Allow me to clarify. We’re going to your son Harry’s communion, held at his house, which is also the family home of the father of the child of the best friend of your ex-husband’s cousin, and currently belongs to his mother and your ex-husband and his current husband? You have to admit that’s absurd.”
“Comical.” Lily rolled her eyes, though her mouth twitched in a smile. “It really does sound like quite a mess, doesn’t it? I still can’t believe that not only did James retrain, but he also decided to open a law practice here, in this village forgotten by God and man. And that Harry is delighted with this place! He really seems to be seriously thinking about taking over this farm someday.”
“I’m having a harder time believing that the current husband of your ex-husband is encouraging him…” Severus began and Lily hit him on the arm. He laughed finally.
“That will never stop amusing you, will it?”
“No, as long as it’s funny. Who would have thought that either of the famous Black brothers would become a farmer. If it were Sirius! But no, he took his boyfriend, and that boyfriend’s child and his own cousin’s, and they first went to Chile, then Argentina, lately I think they were somewhere in West Asia…”
“Cyprus.” Lily touched up her lipstick, glancing at the compact she’d taken out of her pocket. “Don’t shake so much, please, or you’ll make me look like the Joker.”
“That’s not my fault, my flower, this road is really shit. Couldn’t James and Regulus do something so wetlands aren’t running through the middle of their village?”
“Apparently not. The area the locals call the Four Pines is a site of ancient Celtic battles. There are graves everywhere here. And because of the quicksand it’s impossible to extract the bones.”
“Charming. Your son is growing up on graves.”
“Sev, for god’s sake! Don’t you dare say something like that in front of Regulus, or he’ll rip your legs off and quarter you, and James will help him hide the body. You have to at least admit that Hope Lupin is really very nice. Harry’s gained a wonderful honorary grandma in her.”
“I’m not denying it. I just don’t understand why he needs an honorary one when he has a real one near London. Unless I’m mistaken James’s parents are still alive.”
“Yes, but her, the mother of Sirius’s adopted son and Hope’s grandson, Nymphadora, is living with them now. Apparently she really likes London. Please stop chuckling to yourself.”
“Your family is just so weird.”
“This is just as much your family as mine, and above all it’s Harry’s family.” At the mention of his stepson’s name, Severus smiled slightly. He really liked that boy: he was smart for his age and sharp. And little Teddy Lupin-Black was too. Lily had sent him a Little Chemist set for his birthday and Sirius and Remus had sent them a few videos of the boy having no problem with the various experiments, focused at each one like he was dealing with a beloved toy. Though no surprise, his fathers were also able to devote themselves to projects completely. Remus was a sought-after, damn talented architect, and Sirius was apparently opening his sixth tattoo parlor branch. Severus glanced at his pale forearm, where he had a small lily tattooed. Sirius had once done tattoos like that for him and Remus, only Remus’s was a daffodil. It fit nicely right next to the constellation of Sirius on Remus’s back. Because of the nature of their work, Lily and Severus traveled all over the world. They’d happened to be in the same city as Sirius’s family a few times, and after overcoming old grudges, they’d both become genuinely friendly with them. Severus regretted that he couldn’t say the same about James Potter and the second Black brother, but Potter and Regulus were simply unbearable. One loved almost the whole world, and the other hated it with almost no exceptions and both those options were equally exhausting. Well, as long as they somehow complemented each other…
Hope Lupin checked the tables set up under tents outside, waiting for guests, once again and smiled with satisfaction. It looked gorgeous. Primarily thanks to Regulus; that boy really had a special way of seeing beauty and a highly developed sense of aesthetics. James, on the other hand, if he’d been allowed, probably would have served guests food in some dented tin bowl. One bowl, to have less washing up.
“But you’re not going to the field today, are you, Reggie?” Andromeda asked worriedly, coming up with an armful of daffodils and putting them in vases. Regulus shook his head reluctantly.
“I’d like to, Andy, but apparently when your son is having his communion it’s not done,” he stated gloomily; but no one was fooled, because at the sight of Harry running toward him, he smiled fondly and pulled the boy into his arms. “What’s up, kiddo? Where’s dad?”
“Uncle Siri and Remmy are here! And Teddy!” Harry was practically bouncing with excitement, pulling him by the hand. “Come on, come on, we have to go greet them!”
“Not so fast, Harry, your uncle Sirius already thinks that wherever he appears, he’s the brightest star in the sky, and Remus only reinforces that…”
“Reggie! Be nice.” James, who was standing at the gate, pulled him to himself and kissed him briefly on the mouth. “You’re not fooling anyone. Everyone knows the Black brothers would jump into fire for each other.”
“Probably just to make sure the other one finally actually burns.” Regulus argued out of principle, but lost with a smile when little Teddy grabbed onto his legs with the strength of a bear cub. “Hi, little Banshee. Gonna scream for Uncle Reg? Harry, want to help him? Uncle Siri definitely missed your voice.”
Teddy took a breath. Harry did too. Both screamed so loudly that the birds sitting in the nearby fields took off with a loud flutter of wings.
Wales was beautiful at this time of year.