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He notices them when he moves to push his white vans towards the shoe shelf, a pair of black converse placed innocently on the floor. They would look wildly out of place if not for the fact that Suho has seen these shoes almost as often as his own—he has probably tied the laces on the cotton shoes more than his own. Sieun hadn’t told him that he would come over, he checks their chat just to be sure, but he’s clearly here—unless the shorter man now walks around without shoes.
Suho grins to himself as he moves out of the entryway, butterflies flutter around in his stomach and his heart feels warm—something he always feels when it’s about his Sieun.
Sieun is almost invisible from the doorway, buried under the duvet—surrounded by the smell of Suho—only his fluffy brown hair is visible. He pulls off his windbreaker and jeans so he can lay down next to the owner of his heart, the other smells so good that he can’t help but pull him closer to himself so his nose can get buried in the soft hair. Arms wrapped tightly around the soft and pliant body.
It hits him then and there that he wants to marry Sieun, wants him to be his.
He wants to browse for rings, already knowing that he immediately would go towards either the plain rings or the pattern ones—his Sieun doesn’t wear jewelry but could probably be happy to wear a ring from him. Their rings would match, the same type of metal adorning their left hands—embracing their ring fingers in a hug that promises love until death do them apart.
Imagining himself in a situation where he goes down on one knee and asks Sieun to be his husband—asks him to be his forever love—makes his body tingle with excitement, yet at the same it feels so correct to be asking Sieun to be his husband. He wants it so bad he doesn’t even know what to do with himself, he craves it—like a man in the desert needing water.
Suho is aware that they’re young, they’re only nineteen, he knows that the rings he should be looking for are couple rings and not wedding rings. But when he considers it, it feels wrong, as if someone’s given him a puzzle with one corner piece missing—making it incorrect from the beginning. If he’s going to give Sieun a ring then it will be together with the promise to love him until he’s on his last breath.
It’s not exactly shocking when he thinks about it, this is not the first time he has thought about marrying Sieun, no it’s far from even the tenth time he’s thought about it. Sieun has always made him a bit insane, made him act obsessed, he wants to lock Sieun in his room so no one else can lay their eyes on such a stunning man—so no one can imagine stealing him away.
He thinks about it when they’re at a restaurant—where the dishes have complicated names so you don’t really know what you ordered—and Sieun pouts at him because there’s olives on his plate. The same man that their classmates thought were unable to show any expression besides boredom will pout at Suho because he wants him to fix it. His Sieun is so cute with his plump lips and eyes filled with all the stars in the universe—Suho must have him for himself.
It’s in his mind when he peels oranges for Sieun before the other one can start—despite having told Baku that he can peel his fruit himself, thank you very much. It's a natural reaction for Suho to peel oranges for Sieun, just as it is to eat his olives, if his boyfriend hands him an orange he will peel it. “I see, only your husband is allowed to peel your fruit” Suho hadn’t even registered what Baku said before Sieun had confirmed that statement. Knowing that Sieun sees him as his husband causes his heart to skip a beat, the only thing he can hear is his own heartbeat as his cheeks start to flush.
He imagines being married to him when he comes home and Sieun is sitting in the living room with his grandmother, a knife in a light grip as he peels a peach while his eyes stay fixated on the TV in front of them. Taking the time to peel the skin despite the fact that Suho can eat it—he just doesn’t like it.
He can see it when they’re in his bedroom, bodies rocking against each other, covering each other in their sweat, they’re flushed and out of breath, it’s as intimate as it can become. Suho loves taking Sieun apart before he puts him together, he cherishes the trust Sieun gives him, that he allows Suho to see him when he’s vulnerable, that he permits him to worship the body in front of him. Sees it clearly when Sieun shows off the purple marks on his neck, his boyfriend must know how he has Suho wrapped around his finger.
Suho wants to eat him so he can always keep a part of Sieun with him, he wants to belong to Sieun more than he already does, he wants to be able to introduce him as his husband.
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He vividly remembers asking Sieun if they were married in their past lives, to this day he still doesn’t know what made him ask that. Maybe it was to observe the other’s reaction, a weird way to check if he would be disgusted? Suho doesn’t know. What he does know is that he thought about Sieun and marriage before the question left his lips.
The first time Suho thought about marrying him must’ve been when he saw him for the first time—a boy whose cheeks still had that baby fat, fluffy brown hair that laid perfect as if to frame his watery eyes. Oh those eyes, Suho remembers when they landed on him, they set him alight when they swept over him. Their eyes met and it truly felt like the world stopped, he had never seen such expressive eyes before, he had to get them on him again, had to feel the weight of them on him. He remembers thinking that he wants to marry that pretty boy, despite the fact that they never talked.
His grandmother used to tell him that he would feel it when he met his person, something about soulmates and how every person has someone that is theirs. It sounded unbelievable at the start but then he met Yeon Sieun and he truly felt it inside him that this person is his.
Perhaps it’s weird to want to marry someone based on their eyes but Suho knew, he knew that Sieun would be the one for him, felt it in the way everything felt right when they were near each other, felt it in the way that made him question if they actually were married in a past life, are they reincarnations of themselves from a different life?
Ever since then Yeon Sieun has had a place both in his heart and in his brain, he’s unforgettable, he’s an addiction Suho doesn’t want to get cured from, if anything he wants Sieun so bad that he would fight anyone that tries to take him away. He knows that Sieun shares that sentiment.
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It’s not like people—okay the ones they care about—would think badly of them if they decided to get married at nineteen, everyone already knows they’re obsessed with each other, they’re codependent, they’re two halves of one soul—incomplete without the other.
Their friends already make jokes about it, how they act like a married couple, asking who is taking the other’s last name. Suho can’t lie, imagining Sieun with his last name made him short circuit, it was an insane thought and it was something he wanted, he wanted to hear people call out to Sieun only to get a response from two voices because both would have the last name Ahn.
He’s taken out of his thoughts when the warm body next to him starts moving, trying to wiggle out of his tight hold. Sieun's cheeks have marks from his pillows—Suho is not jealous, it would be insane to be jealous of a pillow. Suho is hovering over the other before he realized he even moved, lowering his head until his lips meet the warm cheek, he can’t resist it, biting softly at the flesh, a hand is running through his hair.
“Were you watching me sleep again?” Sieun’s voice is deep and raspy from the nap, he doesn’t have to reply, the answer is obvious but he still mumbles out a confirmation. Anyone else would think it was creepy, watching someone else sleep—laying next to them watching as their chest moves up and down at every breath. Not Sieun, he’s used to Suho watching him—has felt that intense stare land on him multiple times, even before they became friends and then boyfriends.
Suho moves down from the warm cheeks, leaves light kisses as he rests his head on Sieun’s shoulder.
“Do you want to get married?” The question escapes his lips before he even has a chance to catch it, blood rushes to his face, he can feel his cheeks darken. He doesn’t even have a ring, he has one picked out with matching chains they can use, but he doesn’t have it physically, what kind of idiot proposes without a ring? Then it hits him, what if Sieun thinks they’re too young? “I know we're young, we can wait if you need to, or not do it at all if you don’t want to get married” he’s rambling, the words fall out of his mouth in a panic, he can’t lose his true love.
“Sure.”
Did—did Suho hear that correctly? He springs up so fast he gets lightheaded, looking down at Sieun—he’s stunning, so breathtaking, basically begging to get worshiped. He can feel his cheeks flush dark as Sieun continues talking “I have already looked at some apartments we can move to” Suho isn’t sure he’s breathing, Sieun has that ability to take his breath away.
Suho can’t do anything other than to dive down to catch the plump lips pouting up at him.