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Karin sat wrapped in on herself. She was in the corner of her room between the bed and the wall. This was where she felt safest, because nobody ever bothered to find her here, even if they came to the door like Dalia had that day, they didn’t breach the doorway. Karin shook her head and then rested it in her small palm.
“I don’t want a brother.”
“It doesn’t matter what you want, Karin, it’s already happened. Do you expect me to give him up? You think that the world goes round on your command!”
“No I don’t!” She yelled in her most shrill, demonic voice.
Dalia grunted in frustration, “Don’t speak to me that way, child!”
Tired of it, having had her small privacy ruined, Karin shot up and went for the door. Dalia, always too slow for her, was easily shoved aside. She made her own monstrous sound as Karin ran past her, into the living space, then out the door and into the hallway.
Her new hiding place was between a hulking grandfather clock and a wall. They lived in an apartment block in Jettaiah, they were the first apartment in the stretch of the hall, and she was just after the last one. She sat there for a while, and of course Dalia didn’t come looking for her. She was used to Karin’s antics. She liked to call Karin dramatic, and said her reactions were overblown. Karin thought her reactions were the most reasonable. How could everyone else stand by and just let bad things happen?
Footsteps did come down the hall eventually, but they weren’t the clicking of Dalia’s heels. Just the stomping of big, heavy boots. It couldn’t be, could it? It just couldn’t be! The idea that he’d come looking for her was ridiculous. They were right next to strangers.
But those heavy footsteps came closer, and closer, and just when she’d convinced herself it was a neighbor, having counted down each door that could’ve been theirs, a face peeked around the clock. That pointy face with the high cheekbones and the blond hair resting over his forehead. She couldn’t look for long, unless she wanted to lose her dignity altogether.
“There you are. How did I know to find you here of all places?”
“Get away from me, pig!”
She could hear the frown in his voice, “It’s Pav, and that’s no way to treat your new brother.”
“You are not my brother,” she said, “I already have many brothers.”
“Where are they, then?”
“I don’t know!” She snapped, “she took me away from them!”
“Took you away, huh? Well, that’s quite the story.”
They were both silent for a few moments. Tears dripped down her cheeks as this new and inferior older brother came to rest his arm on the clock and make his shadow fall over her.
“You should go back to the flat.”
“I don’t answer to you!”
“How old are you again?”
Karin cocked an eyebrow, “Ten.”
“Well I’m seventeen, so I have seniority over you.”
“Dalia has seniority over you, she’s like a hundred!”
“And Dalia told me to come fetch you.”
“You could’ve waited just another year and you’d be out of the orphanage, but instead you chose to come and ruin everything.”
“Sounds like everything’s already ruined with you around.”
“Fuck you!”
Pav laughed hardily, “Well, well, well! You have quite the mouth on you for a little girl.”
“I’m a young woman.”
“Seems like it!” He chuckled and put out an arm for her to take, “Will this lovely young woman accompany me on a walk back home?”
“It’s not even my home…” Karin mumbled.
Her home was back in Bremen with her mother, her father, and her real brothers. Maybe mother paid her no mind most of the time, but that was okay so long as she had papa. Home was certainly not here with Dalia, and this dastardly former Bremen soldier.
“Not mine, either,” Pav said, “my home is in Voroniya.”
“Voroniya? Then why were you in the Bremen army?”
“That’s something you’ll learn as you get to know me.”
She wanted to say something about how she would refuse to get to know him, but her curiosity was piqued. She resented that fact. Instead of saying a thing, she just glared up at that damn face, wondering wherever his family went.
At last, giving in as she always had to, Karin took his arm and hers, and he hoisted her up with very little effort. That strength gave her butterflies. They walked arm in arm down the hall, Karin stiff and not knowing what to do with herself. They reached their flat, and Pav unleashed her and opened the door.
Dalia was at the oven, putting a great big chicken inside.
“Karin! Where have you—“
Knowing exactly how to dodge this lecture, she ran to her bedroom. She didn’t hide this time, but went to the nightstand and opened the drawer. She sorted through her Book of Alll-Mer, then her school papers, and found a small leather bound notebook.
Opening it up, she flipped through the pages. On each page was a crayon or pencil drawing of her, but she wasn’t alone in them, she was with a tall man. The man was blond, and had sharp features. She didn’t hate this boy for his Bremen military ties, nor his snark, but because he was the one in the drawings. The reason she hated him was that he was the most perfect boy of all, the boy of her dreams.
Karin thought she’d be happy when he came, but not with his attitude, and the fact that she was forced to be his sister of all things.
“Oh little Miss Karin~” came his sing-song voice from the hallway, “Dinner’s ready!”
She was entranced by his voice for a moment, the unique blend of Voroniyan and Bremish. Then, an electric jolt was sent through her body, and she began to stuff the notebook back into the drawer. She covered it with the schoolwork, then the Skin Bible. He came in just as she was slamming the drawer shut.
“Oh my, what are you hiding in there?”
Karin turned to face him and pressed her back to the nightstand, “none of your business, pig!”
“Come on now! It’s nothing you can’t show your big brother.”
He shoved her aside and she grunted as she was pushed against the bed frame. Pav opened the drawer, “Let’s see…”
“No!”
“The more you protest, the more curious I get.”
“Don’t look!”
But he did look. He pulled away the school papers and the Bible and found the little leather notebook.
“Oh, I see, a diary.”
She flushed , “It’s not a diary, it’s a notebook!”
“Well, I’m sure your notes are innocent.”
He opened up the notebook to the worst page possible. The kissing page! She was mortified. He flipped through more of it, seeing all those pictures of her and the perfect boy. His silence terrified her.
“When did you get all the time to draw all this? You’ve known me for hardly a week.”
“I drew it before you, stupid.”
“Ah, so I’m your type.”
Her face twisted into something ugly, and she snatched the notebook from his dirty hands.
“Hey now! Karin, it’s alright to have a little crush. But you must know, you’re too young for me.”
“Obviously.”
“Pavel! Karin!” Dalia called.
“Better get going,” Pav said, “won’t you follow your boyfriend to the table?”
“Shut up, Pav.”
“Finally! She uses my name!”
They both sat at the table as Dalia set up their plates. Karin had her head in her hands, still humiliated by what happened in the bedroom. This was something Pav would use against her forever, she was sure of it. The worst part was that he was right, she was too young for him! She was no young woman, even if her monthly already came, she still went to primary school.
“Karin, no elbows on the table.”
Karin slipped her hands onto her lap and folded them. Her eyes drifted to Pav. She liked how his nose had a bump and a slight hook. She also liked that he had eyelashes like a girl. Eyes now on Dalia, a horrible concept entered her mind.
She made haste to get out of her chair and go over to Pav, looking every second to see if Dalia watched, but she was too focused on her duties. Karin cupped her hand over her mouth, and leaned to whisper in Pav’s ear.
“That’s my deaf ear.”
Karin rolled her eyes and went to his other side, whispering, “Don’t tell Dalia.”
When she pulled away, Pav was smiling and nodding. He offered her his pinkie, and she took it. A promise.
Over dinner, Dalia and Pav did most of the talking while Karin wallowed in her misery. Dalia pulled a photo off a shelf, and showed it to Pav. Karin had to lean painfully to see it.
“Me and my late husband,” she said with pride, “weren’t we so young? We married in a beautiful garden just outside of the city.”
“Beautiful!” Pav doted.
He met her gaze.
“Maybe Karin and I can get hitched there too!”
Dalia chuckled, and Karin glared at him while she slunk back into her chair. Could this day get any worse?
“Well, I suppose you’re not related by blood!”
She shot a dirty look Dalia’s way.
“What? It’s the truth! And you know I’m only kidding, dear.”
That night, she got up from her bed in the dark. She sat at her vanity and brushed her tangled hair. Then, she left the room. She slipped from the black hallway into Dalia’s old room, now occupied by Pav. You wouldn’t have been able to tell, for Dalia had yet to move her things. The only giveaway was the suitcases on the floor. She nearly tripped over one of them trying to get to a light.
A light did flip on, but it was dim, as Pav had turned on the bed lamp.
“Karin?”
“I have a question.”
He yawned, “can it wait until morning?”
She couldn’t look at him, because that stupid idiot was shirtless. He was probably doing it just to tease her.
“No. I need to ask it right now.”
He laid back in bed, “Ask away, little miss.”
“When you say we’ll get married, are you serious?”
He contemplated this for a moment, “In some ways.”
“Well, when will it happen?”
His smile was warm, “When you’re a grownup, Karin, but I’ll be an old man by then, and you’ll want someone your own age.”
“What if I don’t?”
“Then I’ll wait for you to catch up,” he reasoned, “Now, out of my room. You definitely need your beauty rest!”
“Fuck you,” she said on her way out.
He turned off the light, and she tripped on a suitcase, tumbling to the floor. All that could be heard was a thump and a round of laughter.