Work Text:
“Grace, what is ‘gay’, question?”
Grace choked on his coma slurry. “Excuse me?”
“What is ‘gay’, question?” Rocky repeated innocently.
Grace sighed — so he hadn’t misheard him the first time? Oh God… What had Mary allowed Rocky to read or watch now? The whole reason why Grace liked supervising Rocky’s Human computer time was so that there wasn’t any more translational errors or misunderstandings, so he hoped Rocky hadn’t found anything offensive or homophobic on the web… Grace finished his last spoonful of coma slurry with a sigh. God, he was in for a ride…
“‘You remember how I told you that Humans have sexes, right?” He asked, praying for not enough rant about how humans had ‘yucky yucky yucky parts’ and ‘many many many holes’.
Rocky sat at Grace’s feet like a child waiting for their teacher to read them a story on the carpet. “Yes. Male and female. Males have egg fertilising stick, and females have internal egg nest. Need both for baby. Very complicated. Little pebble only need two Eridians. No sex. No different parts. Very simple.”
Grace sighed. At least he didn’t mention the holes. “Yes, well, originally ‘gay’ meant happy, carefree, cheerful, bright, but now it describes someone who is attracted to the same gender as they are.” He explained. “For example, a man that likes other men, or a woman that likes other women. A man that is only attracted to women is usually called straight or heterosexual, but a man that is only attracted to other men is usually called gay or homosexual.”
“What is difference between sex and gender, male and man; female and woman, question?”
Yep. Definitely in for a ride. “Sex is more someone’s biology and gender is more of a, uh, feeling.” Grace tried to explain. “All Humans are born with sex chromosomes. Someone with XX chromosomes is typically female, and someone with XY chromosomes is typically male, but sometimes, a Human is born with only an X chromosome, XXY chromosomes, XYY chromosomes, XXX chromosomes, or even more than three chromosomes, and that means that they are intersex. About 1.7% of Humans are born with intersex traits. Sometimes, they are obvious, but sometimes they may never know that they have them. Males and females also have different natural levels of hormones. For example, males typically produce higher levels of a hormone called testosterone, and females typically produce higher levels of hormones called estrogen and progesterone.” Grace explained. He wondered how much of the biology aspect Rocky would understand, or whether it would just all go over his head — well, if he had a head. “Meanwhile, Gender is less about what you are born with, and more about how a Human presents themselves socially and culturally in society. Gender is someone’s personal identity and self expression. When a Human is born, their parents are told what sex their child is, but only the child knows what gender they are. It is something you cannot diagnose or label someone with. They just are that gender. Males that identify as men are typically called cisgender men, females that identify as women are typically called cisgender women, and if someone doesn’t identify with the label that they were assigned to at birth, they are typically called trans or transgender.”
“Rocky think Human sex and Human gender very complicated.” He waved an arm at him. “Eridians are much simpler. One sex. No gender. No need lots of words to explain.”
“I know, pal.” Grace sighed, running a hand through his hair. “You’ve told me before.”
“What would Humans say Rocky’s gender is on Earth, question?”
“Oh.” Grace smiled. Well, that was easy. “Agender.”
Rocky did his little non-face pout movement. “A gender, question?” The huff came through the computer’s translator perfectly. “That not answer Rocky’s question, statement.”
“No, agender!” Grace chuckled. “It’s one word. Some Human words have an ‘a’ in front of them to change their meaning, so agender doesn’t mean ‘a gender’ but ‘no gender’ or ‘without gender’. An agender person is usually someone who doesn’t identify with any gender or rejects the concept of gender. They are essentially genderless, regardless of their assigned sex at birth.”
“Amaze! Amaze! Rocky agender!” Rocky chirped, his annoyance evaporating in an instant, as he made cute little jazz hands up at Grace. “How many genders on Earth, question?”
“Lots of genders!” Grace smiled. “On Earth, there are binary genders and nonbinary genders. Men and woman, regardless of if they are cisgender or transgender, are a part of the gender binary, whilst a lot of other genders, like agender, can be considered nonbinary. Nonbinary is like an umbrella term for all kinds of different genders, but can also refer to a third, neutral gender. Someone, who has a gender that fluctuates or changes or is fluid, can identify as genderfluid, and may use different pronouns depending on what gender they are currently experiencing. There’s also genderflux, which is similar to genderfluid and can be considered a type of genderfluidity, but is when someone’s gender fluctuates in intensity. For example, a Human could feel very very very strongly a man or a male aligned gender or masculine-like gender one day, but very very very genderless the next day. A demigender person feels partly, but not fully, connected to a binary or nonbinary gender, and a bigender person experiences two gender, either simultaneously or at different times. Androgyne is when someone feels like their gender is between man and woman or masculine and feminine, Abinary is any gender that is completely unrelated to femaleness, maleness, masculinity, and femininity, and Neutrois is a neutral or null gender. Of course, there’s a lot more than just this, and it really depends on the person, but that should give you a bit of an idea of what genders are out there.” Grace explained. Rocky was lucky that researching LGBT+ identities used to be one of his hyperfixations — finally, his knowledge could be of some use!
“Amaze! Amaze! Amaze!” Rocky chirped, making more jazz hands. “Rocky thought binary genders were very very complicated, but now Rocky thinks binary genders are very very very simple and very very very boring compared to nonbinary genders!”
Grace chuckled. Rocky was a bit of a bossy asshole sometimes, but he was also really cute. “Yeah, man and woman are kind of boring genders, huh?”
“Can all genders be gay, question?”
Grace paused for a moment. “Yes, well, uh, it depends.” He shrugged. “Being gay usually refers to attraction, not gender. Some nonbinary people identify as gay, others don’t, but yeah, anyone could be gay if they want to.” Grace tried to explain. “When someone is gay or trans or nonbinary, they are a part of the LGBTQ+ community.”
“Is LGBTQ+ another Human ac-ro-nym, question?”
“Yes, Rocks, it’s an acronym.” Grace chuckled. “LGBTQ stands for Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, and Queer. The plus stands for all the other identities that aren’t represented by LGBTQ. I think the full acronym is LGBTQIA+ to include intersex, asexual, aromatic, and agender people as well, but I think calling the community the LGBT+ community and LGBTQ+ community is more common.“
“There’s more, question?” Rocky asked yet another question as his jazz hands fell to his sides.
“Yep.” Grace nodded. “Lesbians are typically women who are attracted to other women, or, well, women-aligned or feminine-aligned people who are attracted to other women-aligned or feminine-aligned people, or the attraction to women or nonbinary people, or-or I-I guess, anyone that—“
“—Humans not good at making simple labels.” Rocky cut him off. “Lots of meaning. Lots of opinions. Why not one definition, quest—“
“—Gay is gay; we’ve already covered that.“ Grace sighed, continuing on and ignoring Rocky’s question. “Bisexual means the sexual or physical attraction to more than one gender. Usually the sexual attraction to men and women, but it can be anything really — feminine-aligned and masculine-aligned people, men and nonbinary people, women and nonbinary people, any person — you get the idea, and Biromantic is the romantic counterpart. There’s also pansexual, which means sexual or physical attraction regardless of gender, Omnisexual, Polysexual, and a bunch of other multisexual identities, where someone is attracted to multiple genders. Trans, again, we’ve covered. Queer used to be a word for odd or strange, and was used as an insult, but now people have reclaimed it as a word to mean anyone that is in the LGBT+ community. Then there’s intersex, which I told you about earlier when explaining sex and gender, and now, of course, last but not least, A is for the a-spec umbrella. My community.” Grace finally stopped to breathe.
Rocky gestured at him with one of his arms. “Grace is LGBTQ+, question?”
“Yep.” Grace scratched the back of his head with a nervous smile. “I identify as aroace, which means that I’m both asexual and aromantic.”
It had been a while since Grace had had to come out to someone. Usually they saw the aroace pin on his bag, and if they knew, they knew, but Rocky couldn’t see colour, and even if he did, Grace hadn’t taught him the concept of ‘pride flags’ yet.
During his time at Grover Cleveland Middle School, he’d gotten used to being the only teacher that was an ‘out and proud’ member of the LGBT+ community. Unlike his coworkers, Grace was brave enough to display the rainbow flag in his classroom, despite what the government or any parent had to say on the matter, talked to his LGBT+ students with the respect and understanding that they deserved, and always allowed them to eat in his classroom to avoid the disgusting treatment from some of the other kids. For a lot of the kiddos, Grace was the first person they had ever come out to, and Grace felt so honoured that they saw him as a safe enough person to do that with.
Being aroace was also something he and Stratt bonded over. A part of Grace regretted it in case it was a reason why she found him so expendable to die in space, but then again, she had packed his favourite pride pins and shirts…
“Why not Grace say that earlier, question?” Rocky asked. “Grace tell Rocky all about aroace, statement!”
“Okay, okay, I will!” Grace chuckled. “An asexual person experiences little to no sexual attraction, and an aromantic person experiences little to no romantic attraction. Sexual attraction is a Human desire to be, well, uh, intimate with someone. The Human’s body becomes all gross and weird, and they feel a sort of electric spark for the other person, which makes them want to, uh, take their clothes off…?” Grace squeaked in embarrassment. This was not a conversation Grace wanted to have with his best friend! God, why did he have to be the one to explain sexual attraction to a species that didn’t even have the right parts to have typical Human sex and to understand what it was? “Wh-when I have sex, I-I don’t feel anything for my partner, I don’t enjoy anything we’re doing, and I guess I kinda just…— just lay there?” Grace forced himself to push through his discomfort. “There is no, uh, spark, or-or heat, or passion. I’d much rather be doing something else…” Grace trailed off, chuckling nervously with flushed cheeks and sweaty palms.
Rocky had all five legs on the ground, and sat silently still like an actual rock for an agonising minute. “Rocky thought Grace had ex-mate, question?” He asked, quietly.
“Oh, Linda?” Grace scratched the back of his head. “Yeah, we tried to make it work after college, but we just weren’t compatible enough to make the relationship last. I was… clingy. I constantly wanted massages and cuddles and words of affirmation, but then I didn’t put any effort into having sex. Linda said I never cared about her needs, and never tried to make her feel good, which, I-I mean, she’s not exactly wrong about that, but I struggled to understand how to make her feel good during sex when nothing felt good for me in sex, either, but I wasn’t actively trying to ignore her needs. I just…” Grace pulled at his hair with a deep sigh, “…I couldn’t give her what she needed.” He admitted, lowering his head in shame. “It was my fault. I wasn’t… enough.”
“No! No! No!” Rocky waved an arm at a solemn Grace. “Grace stupid! Grace enough! Linda mean! Linda not deserve special cherished best friend saviour clustermate Grace!”
“Whoa! Hey!” Grace raised his own hands. “Linda wasn’t mean! We ended… amicably. She isn’t the villain here. We just weren’t meant for each other, that’s all.” Grace tried to calm Rocky down. “Besides, being with Linda made me realise that I wasn’t actually dating for romance — I just didn’t want to be alone. All my friends kinda ditched me once they married, settled down, and started families of their own. I became the only single guy in the group, and every time they talked about their lives, it felt like I was missing out on something; like I was broken for not having what they had. Their homes were always nosy, and mine was… quiet. If they had a long, horrible day, they came home to a warm meal and hug, but if I had a long, horrible day, I came back home to an empty house with no food, no hugs, and no one to help me feel better. It made it worse that I had no family to talk to, either.” Grace sighed, running a hand through his hair. “At least, if I had a family, I could make excuses to call or hang out with them every once in a while…”
“Grace alone on Earth.” Rocky whined a minor chord. “Rocky sad no one watch Grace sleep for long, long time. Rocky will call Grace. Rocky will spend time with Grace. Rocky will annoy Grace until Grace wants Rocky to go away, but Rocky will never go away because Rocky loves cherished best friend saviour clustermate Grace.”
“Rocky.” Grace’s eyes were already tearing up — god, he was such a leaky space blob! “Grace loves cherished best friend saviour clustermate Rocky, too.” He ran his fingers over his bondmarked sleeve with a grateful smile.
“Rocky love cherished best friend saviour clustermate Grace more!” Rocky argued, waving three arms. “Rocky not care cherished best friend saviour clustermate Grace is aroace! Rocky not want yucky Human sex with cherished best friend saviour clustermate Grace! Rocky not want romance with cherished best friend saviour clustermate Grace! Rocky just wants cherished best friend saviour clustermate Grace to never leave Rocky again! Rocky just wants cherished best friend saviour clustermate Grace to be clustermates with Rocky forever! Cherished best friend saviour clustermate Grace understand, question? Rocky not Linda. Rocky say Grace is enough. Rocky say Grace is perfect how Grace is. Rocky say Grace never change.”
“Rocky!” Grace croaked, using his sleeves to dab his wet eyes and sniffling nose. “You’re making me leak!”
“Grace leak all the time anyway.” Rocky shrugged. “Leaking happy leaking, question?”
Grace sniffled. “Leaking happy leaky.” He croaked back. “Do you have any more questions?”
Rocky waved an arm at him. “Rocky will make list for later.” He told Grace. “Rocky Grace watch new movie and cuddle. Grace like, question?”
“Yeah, we can watch a movie, pal.” Grace gave the top of Rocky’s carapace a gentle rub, and wiped his eyes for the final time, before standing up. “What do you want to watch?” He asked, already on the way to the Projection Room.
“Something gay!” Rocky followed Grace, catching up quickly on his five feet. “Rocky bored of straight movies!”
“Oh, Rocky bored of straight people now?” Grace teased with a light chuckle. “Isn’t that a bit straightphobic of Rocky, question?”
“Rocky is not straightphobic! Rocky is straight threat!“ He exclaimed, causing Grace to gasp sharply and laugh at his answer. “What so funny, question?” Rocky immediately followed with a huff.
“Nothing!” Grace laughed. “Don’t worry about it, pal.”
“Rocky wants to know!” Rocky whined. “Grace tell Rocky! Grace tell Rocky now!”
“But Grace has nothing to tell Rocky!” Grace laughed. “I just thought it was cute that you wanted straight people to see you as a threat.”
“Rocky not cute!” He protested with the cutest clash of notes. “Rocky threat! Rocky protector of the LGBTQ!”
“I know you are, pal.” Grace leant down to pat him, again. “And I’m very grateful.” He was so lucky.