Chapter Text
I know death now. I’ve seen it. It’s not as uncomfortable as I’d anticipated, but that’s likely because I can’t feel anything. Unlike a snake, it has no fangs.
Ichigo can take it from here.
My arms numb— more than the rest of my body anyway. I don’t feel real, yet all the same death kindles me. Smiles at me. It’s beautiful.
“Gin?” Is that…
Rangiku?
My eyes must have opened at some point without my knowledge. I don’t see her, not quite. I’m having difficulty figuring out sight, I think. The shapes and colors I see don’t spark any resemblance in my mind, yet I know Rangiku.
Of course, she can’t let go. She shouldn’t be here; snakes can bite out of reflex, even hours after death. The electrical impulses keep firing away in their brains, leaving their muscles still functional. She can’t stay away, even in my death I suppose.
Even worse, I’m certain that we’re far too close to Aizen. We can’t stay here. She can’t stay here. There’s no point in comforting a dead man, much less one as uncompassionate as myself.
I try to tell her to leave, to flee, to go anywhere but here but I can’t form the words. My tongue feels thick. My eyelids are heavy. My senses are dulled. Everything feels so distant; I really must be dead.
“Gin! You’re okay…!” She’s seen my eyes open, I suppose. Quite an odd thing to say to a dead man. Even stranger, I find the energy within myself to summon up some last words.
“Mm… sorry,” I manage to cough out as a pitiful start. I don’t know when my throat became so dry. “I’m sorry for… everything. For joining Aizen… for not returning… your…”
“Gin!” Her hand is warm on my face, just as comforting as the dull sensation around my body. She must be wrapped around me. “Don’t waste your energy! I’m so glad you’re…!” She breaks off into sobs, pulling me tighter before I let out another involuntary hack. I must have startled her away, what a pity.
She comes into focus properly when she pulls back. I’m alive. So is she. Ichigo must have done it; I see that now.
I see the sand of her hair. I see the ocean of her eyes. I see the tether around her neck, pulling me to shore. Water drips onto my chest as I stare, trying to think of something. Anything. My memories are hazy.
Snakes typically avoid the beach. The sands aren’t particularly difficult to bury in, but the heat often leaves them completely and utterly exposed if they linger for long. Hiding away in the coastal brush is the smarter thing for them to do; admiring from afar, yet I find myself engulfed in the coastline.
It takes me far longer than it should to realize that we are no longer in Karakura town. Strange; I remember stealing the hogyoku, or at the very least something along those lines. “Where…?”
“Squad Four’s medical area,” Toshiro answered, leaving just as I’m alerted to his presence to give Rangiku some privacy. I’ll have to pay him back for the motion later.
I don’t speak for a long time. I’m not sure what to say. I died, serving my purpose in the sabotage of Aizen, I can’t possibly be here. I still can’t feel much of anything.
There’s a good chance I’m on an absurd amount of painkillers from the slowed speed my thoughts feel like they come in. Every time a thought process begins, something washes it away, carrying it out to sea.
After a moment of trying to… what I think is compose myself, I hear Rangiku chuckle, drawing my attention back. She places a hand at my chin and gently pushes upward, closing a mouth that I hadn’t realized was open. “What’s so amusing, hm…?” I ask, hardly able to blink and miss a second of her being here, safe, and well.
“Captain Unohana must have really given you the good stuff, huh? I-I don’t think I’ve ever seen your eyes open for so long. They’re so… blue,” she continues to laugh as I piece together that she’s laughing at me. I must look absurd at the moment, mouth agape in confusion.
“What other color’d they be…?”
“Don’t worry about it,” she giggles, wiping her tears off my chest. I go to sit up when she pulls away, falling back when I go to support myself. “Gin!”
“What…? Just want to see what’s happening…”
“You—“ she’s staring at me like I’m missing something. I’m not sure what information it is, but I definitely feel out of the loop. I go to sit up again, and she pulls me to sit, propping a hand behind my back for stability.
Her face is still damp with her tears from earlier. A real pity; someone like her never deserves to cry. I go to wipe them from her face, feeling bolder than I’d typically be from whatever it is I’m on, but my hand doesn’t connect. Perhaps a depth perception issue from the painkillers? I try again, noticing my arm hasn’t moved at all, sleeve still by my side.
Before I can worry too much, Rangiku’s other hand finds my face again and turns my face to hers once more. I don’t seem to mind, but she seems thoroughly bothered that I’ve noticed whatever’s happening with my right arm. If I had to guess, it would likely be combat injuries from Aizen, but I can’t say I’ve got the care to find out right now.
“We can worry about… that… later. God, you’re so lucky you’re all doped up right now— I’m going to kill you later, you hear me?” I think I hum or nod or something, because she seems satisfied enough.
My other hand manages to find her face this time, brushing away the salty sea of tears that are starting to dry up on her cheek. This doesn’t seem to calm her at all, instead starting another wave of crying.
“Oh, don’t… do that…”
“What’d you expect me to do? Are you out of your mind? Putting yourself in danger like that— what the hell is wrong with you?!” Her frustrations seem to have distracted her and finally stopped her sorrow, because her tears well up as she lectures.
I feel the corners of my mouth quirk up into what must be a smirk and she relaxes. Time feels as if it washes over me, as everything else is swept away in silence.
Oh, she’s laid me back down at some point or another. I must make some sort of expression that she takes to be an invitation, because she follows suit and lies down next to me as I realize just how disheveled she is.
I presume she’s waited quite a while for me to wake up. I’ll have to add the distress I’ve cause to my list to amend for. I can do that some other time. Rangiku is safe. Happy, even. “For that…. mm grateful…”
“What?” She bites back a smile, dimples showing in the way I can never forget.
Has she heard my thoughts? Perhaps I’ve mumbled out loud. Oh well… Ichigo certainly has handled Aizen. We’re safe. She’s safe. Buried in blankets on the cot as if in a snake's burrow, nothing else could ever matter.