Chapter Text
Dean stares out across the highway on his way to make final preparations before saying yes to Michael. How stupid could he be, thinking that his thing with Cas was something real. As soon as God gave up on them, Cas gave up on Dean. Like he was gonna keep the necklace after all that. Without it, none of this would have ever happened. He wouldn’t have started having all those messed up dreams about Cas, they wouldn’t have fucked twice, and he would still have his 100% straight dude card. It was worse than worthless! It was nothing but a fucking curse! And then Cas threw it all back in his face by asking him where the stupid thing was. I got it the first time, you junkless bastard. It’s fucking over! He tightens his grip on the steering wheel and grits his teeth.
There had been a little while there after that time in the back seat where Dean had considered the possibility that he and Cas could be...something after the apocalypse was all over. He wasn’t sure what, exactly, but he’d imagined them driving around, hunting stuff, pranking his brother, maybe fooling around between cases and keeping it a secret. If Sam came back to the hotel while they were going at it, Cas could just teleport them to the roof, or another unoccupied room, or, hell, a field full of flowers for all he cared. And he would never have to take another shower after sex because Cas could always just clean them up. Yeah, that sounded pretty damn good. And the best part was that Cas already knew all about hunting, what with being a fucking angel and all. It sounded, well, honestly, kind of perfect. Dean wouldn’t be putting him into the line of fire unnecessarily by being with him.
Unlike Lisa. She was absolutely fucking amazing and she knew about his hunting, but she wasn’t a hunter, and he didn’t want Ben to grow up to be one either. It was a terrible life. Deep down Dean knew that being with Lisa would cause nothing but problems for her and Ben. But if he was your average Joe instead of the hollow shell of a man he was, they would be the perfect family for him. He at least owed Lisa a goodbye before becoming Michael’s onesie.
He consults the map to Lisa’s that he’s drawn and pushes down on the gas.
~*~