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Larry sighed out yet again, while trying to grip the parts of his slipping sanity - quite a usual day.
He scanned the computer screen with his eyes which took no longer than four seconds: a massage appointment for an anonymous couple.
The questionaire in which the client is supposed to write an entire autobiography's worth of information (jealousy for the clients who have the time to do such a thing panged again) was left fully blank, with the exception of a single line.
One of the partners simply wrote "I enjoy candle".
Well, that sounds fun.
While placing a few candles in the midst of a harshly smiling morning sun peeping behind the window (the customer is always right!), he was having disturbing flashbacks of the Nigel and Lucy's couple visits (and the damage of property that tagged along with them). With different types of deep breaths, he was counting the dreadful seconds.
Breathe in small doses of air to the rythm of a slow, romantic song and breathe it all out at once (and reversed). Karen taught him this one. He didn't know a lot of songs, but there was this slow, yet catchy tune playing at the Elmore Mall the other day.
Breathe in the entire room's worth of air, release it through the open window while screaming on full ape volume. Steve taught him this one. He still would try to look civilised (the other demonstrated exercises could potentially end him up in prison), so he didn't attempt the yelling part yet, but the view from the open window was quite mesmerising.
Catching the seconds of love in the hours of dread...
He secretly wished those two would be the ones showing up behind the door. It all turned out simply too well in the end, but between him and them still stood a barrier of time and pretty much hundreds of dead-end jobs. Since there's two, it could be them. But Karen worked nearly every single day of the week as well and treated schedules seriously, unlike a certain hippie who'd dabble in every cashier job of his. This tactic of going as an anonymous romantic couple also seemed all too strange for him. And so, he pushed these sweet thoughts aside as he heard the doorbell chime.
He opened the door, finding an empty hall. Maybe not so empty, as the cushions by the door were shaped quite oddly. And it's Sunday - Karen's often free on Sundays...
"Wait a minute..." he thought to himself, without a single hint of annoyance. Suddenly, a smile adorned Larry's face as he pulled Karen out of the impractically comfortable seat.
"Oh, Laurence... your smiling face is simply one of a kind!"
Hearing the pink woman's compliment, her calling him by his own true name yet again and having his secret daydreams turning out to be true after all, Larry felt the warmth and joy of love and that feeling was the equivalent to what more than a thousand copies of the main couple in his film "From The Moment our Eyes Met" would have felt, beaming all over him as he tried to get Mr. Small out. After a few tries, he managed to pull out the zoned-out cloud primate and set him standing. After a brief moment, he suddenly managed to wake up:
"I had transcended into a different reality just now... but it felt empty without you in it," Steve remarked wholeheartedly, as he put his hand on Larry's shoulder. And then put on his classic flirty face and winked at him. Larry could barely keep his cool.
"Maybe it felt empty because it was a waste of poor dollars- I mean, nice fabric," he then sighed, as he looked at the seats.
"Laurence, don't you worry about money someone else wasted! We've got thirty minutes to ourselves, and no money could buy what we have," Karen blushed as she took Larry's hand with a reassuring smile.
"Aw, you guys..." Larry's eyes darted to the both of them and then checked if there wasn't anybody else nearby. He kneeled down slightly so he could hug them both. "You're like family to me... but we kind of are, we did kinda get married... I can't believe I am not in the middle of a quick night-shift nap right now... that or a Watterson is about to blow us up," he kept confessing as he led his partners in. Suddenly, Steve Small grabbed him and threw him straight onto a massage bed.
"I thought I was supposed to-"
"Shh. Not a word," Small said with a comically deadpan expression, raising his pointer finger to Larry's lips. "You are now entering a state of calm in three! Two! One! Takeoff! Whoooooooosh... pow pow pow..."
"Besides, how are you supposed to calm your clients from their troubles when you're as tense as a rock?" Karen chimed in as she began to lightly stroke Larry's back.
"I'm an actor, dear. That, and I'm quite literally made out of rock," Needlemeyer let out a small chuckle and felt himself getting warm everywhere from her touch.
"So that's it! Is my love finally pursuing a career path he loves?" Steve asked hopefully.
"Hahahahaha! No," Larry retorted, leaving the furry cloud looking like a sad wet dog.
"Now is the wrong time to act, Laurence," Karen stated as she continued to stroke his back.
"Ah..." Larry let out a sigh of relief which was music to the ears of his lovers. They both showed each other a thumbs-up - the operation is going successfully!
"We're just getting started, organic sugar!" Steve exclaimed as he pulled out a gong and a singing bowl out of thin air and started to play them loudly.
"This sounds delightful, Steven," Karen whispered. "You know, I've always wanted to play an instrument, but something would always get in the way..." Larry used to relate to this sentiment every single day.
"Why don't you try it?" Steve suggested.
"Why should I? I'm no good! As if Laurence hasn't experienced enough horrible sounds already," Karen chuckled, starting to trace Larry's back in circular motions. She noticed how this SPA uniform Needlemeyer wore looked so casual. Almost as if he was wearing his home clothing (which he could never put on at this point). She found that the light blue T-shirt suited him well.
"How will you know if you never try it? It's pretty simple, too! Just follow your heart!" Steve stated, encouraging her.
And so, Karen and Steve switched places. Karen was very hesitant at first, but it took just a slight tap to produce a quiet, yet mesmerising sound. Her eyes twinkled as she continued releasing different sound waves. She eventually got brave enough and grabbed the singing bowl as well.
Meanwhile, Steve had gotten his hands on Larry. Mr. Small got him out of his shirt and prepared his hands by spitting on them and then rubbing them together. He did try to do it quietly (Larry heard it anyway, but he didn't mind at all), though.
Steve kneaded Larry's hard, yet foldable skin. It hurt sometimes, but the relief afterwards made up for it (and the melody Karen was playing helped out as well). Larry wondered how he was doing it.
"I see those candles you've picked up, sweetest berry," Steve said. "I can smell the soy from afar!"
"If you're talking about the wax, it's paraffin," Larry corrected him.
"Your attention to detail amazes me!" Steve replied.
"Why did you write that thing about candles in the customer form anyway?"
"Well..." Steve and Karen said in unison.
"I have to say, your idea is great!" Steve replied earlier that day.
"So should we do it?" Karen smiled.
"Yes! And I say we enter incognito mode," he stated mysteriously while mispronouncing the word "incognito".
"I don't think it's necessary, Steven... we aren't trying to hide our search history from anyone, I believe this is more of a shared space problem. Or a problem the kids have nowadays."
"I meant we should go incognito! So our visit would be a surprise!"
"Oh, I see! Let's do it then, shall we?"
They searched for the registration form on Mr. Small's phone.
"There are some questions here..." Beat. "Quite a lot, actually." Another beat. "Well, we could just leave blanks and write "Anonymous"!" Karen said.
"Sure! But... what if he gets scared?"
"What do you mean?" she replied with a blank expression.
"He might get stressed out and think we might... rob him," Steve tried to think of more examples, but failed.
"Who would ever rob a SPA?"
"Crazy people tend to do crazy things, I'll tell you that..."
"So why did you want to do this "incognito" thing in the first place? And it isn't even pronounced like that!" Karen began to lose her patience.
"Yes, it is! We could write something random about us that wouldn't immediately give us away, but doesn't make us look all intimidating. Like..." Steve was getting annoyed as well. He started typing out "I enjoy candles and meditation".
"What are you doing?! He'll see right through you! Right through us, actually!"
"No, he won't! Meditation is universal tete a tete!"
"That doesn't make any sense! And you've said tête à tête wrong!"
"No, it's tete a tete!"
They started to banter and let their tiny fingers loose (Steve had a persistent dejá-vu feeling... and kept hearing the word quinoa yelled out in his mind). The statement got partially, but not fully deleted. And one of them accidentally clicked the "Done" button.
"I enjoy candle".
The trio had a laugh together after the flashback.
"Maybe I had stolen your man from you for too long? Come here, I can play now. You did wonderfully! Your soul guides you to do wonderful things..." Steve exclaimed, making Karen's smile even wider. "Larry is so calm that he might need a little refresher if he wants to get up later!" he joked.
"I did take up a few carate classes when I was younger..." Karen stated. Larry's relaxed eyes suddenly shot up, wide open. Karen noticed him getting just a tiny bit tense again:
"Don't worry, Laurence! I had stopped learning once I received the green belt."
She then started to perform all kinds of preparation and chop moves on Larry's back. They were precise, yet surprisingly quite gentle.
"Steven, maybe you want to join in? Come!"
He was eager to improvise together with her.
"Uh... this is a strange request, especially since you've brought me to the heavens already, but... I don't really wanna stare at the floor like this right now," Larry mumbled awkwardly. "You know I don't get to see you two very often and I just-" Larry's flush of embarrassment turned into one of surprise as he suddenly saw Karen staring into his eyes from below the hole of the bed.
"Don't worry, we've got you covered," Karen winked sweetly.
They both exchanged in peeking through at their lover's face a few times, until a good question popped up in his head:
"Wait... how much time have we got?
"We've got all the time in the world, naturally sweet raisin..."
"Five minutes and five seconds," Karen stated.
"Perfect... alright, it's time for me to get to work!"
"Noo! Why are you leaving so soon?" Steve cried out.
"Not yet... It's time to treat you two as a thank you! After all, you were the ones who booked a couple massage, not me," he smiled at them as he sat up. "Just don't overdo these things... not that I wouldn't love that myself, but who else is gonna prevent Elmore's economy from inevitable doom? Ha, ha... ha," normally, his eyelid would twitch here, but it didn't.
"Don't worry, Laurence. You know I'll be sure to keep Steve in check!"
The work of his paper-rock hands was precise - like the cuts of scissors. He had been qualified for it, after all.
The massage movements fit the very finely detailed, though concerningly see-through ribcage/spine and the delicately round pear shape without a single edge to be seen perfectly.
Maybe it wasn't just the experience he had.
Maybe it was like Steve would say - the soul leads the way.
Maybe it was because these were the bodies of very special individuals, the only individuals of Elmore who have respect for him and even manage to love him.
Those thirty minutes had melted away, leaving Larry feel the best he's ever felt in a very long time.
Steve and Karen still had all of the remaining half-hours of the day to themselves.
They decided to head to the park and meditate together on the grass while holding hands, connecting their physical and inner presence.
Steve turned out to be like a mentor to Karen, who would show her ways to the spiritual world. What she didn't know is that she guided him even more. Steve used to lead a vegetarian diet only vocally, but when Karen confessed that she had been inspired by him of all people to start herself, shame ate him up from the inside. She accidentally gave him insights on how to actually start. She showed him the ways to cook many amazing vegetarian dishes from India... This brought them very close, so Steve found it really hard to continue living this lie.
Then, they talked about their possible start of a musical journey together. Karen, unlike most of the Elmore citizens with ears and/or fine hearing, enjoyed listening to the CDs of his experimental tunes (especially "Hit Single"). They were the only reason she'd find herself at store dumpsters.
After that, the duo decided to have a lunch/dinner at the fancy restaurant. This was no ordinary Sunday, after all!
And it shouldn't have come as a slightest surprise to see that Larry was the waiter serving them, yet it did for the couple, in a way.
He winked at them and did the rest in the almost ordinarily formal way, saying the "sirs" and "madams" with a very noticeably tender tone to them. He was oh-so-glad that his partners were starting to enjoy each other's company. That was one of his biggest concerns when he was still stuck in the dilemma before his dream-come-true. And that bond of his partners didn't have a name, though it could be put as a friendly and romantic guide.
a sunset for three
a taxi drove by the bench
a day's third meet-up