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The smell of grilled food and the faint sounds of laughter float from the backyard, flooding Annie’s senses as she steps out of her friend’s car. The sun was starting it’s descent in the sky, but things were just getting started in Therise’s backyard.
Today was a grand occasion, at least that’s how Rosette described it to Annie when she told her about the cookout at Therise and Cornbread’s. Annie remembers rolling her eyes as her friend all but begged her to make those cinnamon rolls that always get ate up first when dessert is brought out.
That was almost a month ago, though. She didn’t understand what made today so special, but she loved baking for her friends, so she found herself planning to full pans of those rolls. It wasn’t until the day came closer that something she kept tucked into a small corner of her mind, started consuming her thoughts.
Or someone, rather.
Elijah Moore.
It all clicked into place when she ran into Therise on her way to the hair salon earlier in the week. When she found out where Annie was headed, she thought her friend knew the twins were coming home. The easy smile Annie had been wearing all day faded. Her friend hadn’t even noticed the change in her demeanor, too excited about the return of her husband and his friends.
What stuck in Annie’s mind, and still sat there as she and Rosette grabbed the pans of cinnamon rolls, was that Therise said the twins were home for good.
For Good.
Annie felt it was too good to be true. The men she’d known for eight years, back in Clarksdale to stay? It didn’t even sound right in her thoughts, it was something she’d never voice out loud.
She didn’t believe it. Couldn’t believe it. Believing it meant getting her hopes up. Elijah would be home for good. Her heart could rest, and she’d finally let him take her out on that date he’d been begging for since 6 months before he left the first time.
But she wouldn’t let herself hope. Not until she saw him, and heard the words herself. Even then she’d still be hesitant. No matter what Elijah decided for himself, if Elias decided different, he’d be changing his plans.
She’s pulled from her thoughts when Rosette steps up next to her.
“I see your man is here already,” she teases with a smirk.
Annie cuts her eyes at her. “Last I checked, I’m single,” she says, making Rosette chuckle.
“You sure don’t act like it, Ann. That man been in and outta here for years and you ain’t gave no other man a real chance.”
Annie just smacks her teeth softly and starts up the path to the door.
Rosette follows behind her, a confused expression on her face.
“Why you goin’ through the front? Everybody in the back,” she questions.
Annie glances back at her.
“These can’t be in the heat. Unless you want the icing melted off.”
But the truth they both knew was that she needed a moment before she saw him. She didn’t miss his truck parked in the driveway. It was the first thing her eyes landed on when they pulled up. Seeing him for the first time in three years was all she’d thought about since Tuesday when she ran into her friend.
It was all that sat in her mind as she pinned her curls up before bed last night, and when she took them down this morning. It was all she thought about as she looked between his her two favorite sundresses before settling on the blue one that hugged her waist just right.
Annie pulls the screen door open, stepping across the threshold with bated breath. Her feet carry her to the kitchen, Rosette not too far behind her buzzing about who’s she’s excited to see, but Annie isn’t paying her any attention.
Her focus is on the people scattered throughout the yard that she has full view of through the windows above the sink. Therise and Cornbread are running around one of the tables, chasing after their 4 year old daughter. Annie’s chest warms as she watches the little girl have the time of her life with her parents hot on her heels.
She looks further to the left, seeing Bo and Grace seated at a table in the shade, baby Lisa cradled in Bo’s arms. She rolls her eyes softly when she looks back across the yard, spotting Pearline sitting in a lawn chair wearing a wide smile, Stack leaned over her whispering something in her ear.
She didn’t see him, though.
She let out a soft sigh, turning to sit her rolls on the counter. Rosette places the other pan beside it before looking at Annie. She watches her for a moment, and though Annie can feel her eyes on her, she doesn’t look up from the pans in front of her.
“Annie girl. What’s troublin’ you?” Rosette asks softly, rubbing a supportive hand on her friend’s arm.
Annie looks at her for a moment, a conflicted expression on her face.
“I don’t know,” is what she settles on as her gaze falls to the counter again.
Rosette just gives her a look. “You do know.”
Annie rolls her eyes softly.
“I do,” she says after a moment. “I’m scared.”
“Of what? Finally giving that man the chance the both of y’all been waitin’ on?”
“No,” Annie shakes her head, looking at her friend again. “Of him deciding to leave again if I do.”
Rosette frowns sympathetically, her hand finding Annie’s.
She almost didn’t know what to say. She couldn’t say it was Annie overthinking, he’d done it before.
Elijah, and Elias left Clarksdale eight years ago for the army. Annie had only been in town for a few months, having moved down there to be with her grandmother after finishing school. She was newly 18, and the idea of a new town and new people excited her as she was entering adulthood. She met him on her third day in town. She and her grandmother were walking down the strip when the twins crossed their path.
Angeline Vincent stopped the twins, who wouldn’t have dared walked past the older woman without speaking anyways. She talked to them, but Annie can’t recall what the woman was saying. Her eyes were fixated on him from the moment he came into her line of vision. Even standing directly beside a man with the same face as his, she felt like she hadn’t, and would never, meet a man like him again.
Angeline invited them over for dinner that evening, and that day was the start of… whatever led to this moment. Love almost didn’t feel like a big enough word to describe how they felt about each other. Both Elijah and Annie knew deep down that there was nobody else for them.
Annie stood in Therise’s kitchen, her mind combing through all the memories she did have with him. He never hid his feelings for her, quite the opposite actually. It was her who was hesitant. She wouldn’t allow herself to fall for a man who might leave and not come back to her. Elijah understood how she felt, but he didn’t let it stop him from making it known how he was feeling.
That first time, he was gone for 4 years. He wrote to her every week, and she’d respond after she received two letters. When his contract ended, she allowed her hopes to rise.
She wanted to believe he’d be home for good. He’d never said outright he was done, but she allowed herself to believe it until Elias came home a year later.
He wasn’t even home for a month before he started talking about reenlisting. Elijah didn’t need to talk to her about it, she knew what it meant for him. All she could think about was how foolish she felt.
This time, it’d been three years. Those three years were all it took for the doubts she held to settle deep in her bones.
“Talk to him, Ann. You know he’ll answer whatever questions you might have, you just gotta ask ‘em.”
Annie nods at her friend’s words, a thankful smile finding her face. Rosette pulls her into a hug, pulling away with refreshed enthusiasm.
“Alright, I’m heading out back!”
“Okay, I’m gonna cut these then I’ll be out there.”
Annie watches as she walks out of the kitchen, turning to grab a knife from the block on the counter and pulls the wrap on the first pan back. She looks over the pan, more than satisfied with how the cinnamon rolls turned out.
She takes her time cutting them, using the time to settle her thoughts and nerves, but also wanting to make sure there was enough for everyone. As she moves on to the second pan, she hears the door open again.
She doesn’t glance back, she doesn’t need to. His steady footsteps and the smell of grilled meat mixing with the tobacco that lingered on his clothes flood her senses. He doesn’t say anything at first, walking over to the refrigerator for another pan of burgers waiting to be cooked.
Annie’s eyes are trained on the pan in front of her, cutting into the cinnamon rolls meticulously, as if it was the most important thing in the world. Elijah closes the door and turns to face her, sitting the pan on the counter.
He watches her for a moment, a smile ghosting his lips as he clocks her commitment to not acknowledging him. It widens as he takes in her appearance. He lets the silence sit around them for another moment, making his way to stand next to her at the counter.
He watches as she makes the last cut and places the knife on the counter. Her hands rest on the counter, and he wants nothing more than to reach out and touch her. He knows he shouldn’t, though. His eyes shift to the sweets in front of her, and the aroma bringing back memories of him sitting in her grandma’s kitchen while Annie baked.
Being in her presence put his mind at ease and loosened the tension in his shoulders. But as much as relief filled him, the guilt he felt as a result of his choice, lingered.
“How you been?” he asks, his voice low.
Annie pulls the wraps back over the pans to keep herself busy.
“Fine. How you?”
“Better, now,” he says, and Annie hates the way her heart melts a little.
She finally looks at him, and his whole body softens under her gaze.
“I missed you, sugar.”
Annie smiles softly. “I missed you too,” she tells him, and he moves in for a hug.
His arms wrap around her waist as her hands come to rest at the nape of his neck. They hold each other for what feels like forever, savoring the moment, but the guilt he felt still gnawed at his nerves.
“I’m sorry,” he murmurs into her hair.
Annie pulls back, arms still resting on his shoulders as she looks into his eyes.
Elijah frowns softly when he notices the misty look in hers. “I know I ain’t do things how I should’ve before I left, and for that I apologize.”
Annie bites her lip softly. “You never told me you was stayin’, Elijah.”
“But, I could’ve told you what was going on before things were set in stone. I knew how you felt, and I was bein’ selfish.”
Annie knew what he meant without him having to say it.
“I want you to know it won’t happen again. I’m done. He done. We stayin’ this time.”
Annie closes her eyes for a moment, wanting so badly to believe his words. When she opens them again, the fear she felt was clear on her face.
“You can’t see the future, Smoke.”
His brow creases slightly.
“I don’t need to see it to know I ain’t leavin’ here again. Not unless it’s with you.”
Annie’s arms fall from his shoulders, and she steps back, but he grabs her hand before she can get too far away.
“How can I trust that, though?” she questions, the words shaking as they pass her lips.
“You left the first time seven years ago. I barely knew you then, but I was terrified that you wouldn’t come back. Then when I finally thought I could breathe, there you came tellin’ me you were doin’ it all over again.”
“And now I’m tellin’ you I’m here,” he says, squeezing her hand softly. “I mean what I say, you know that.”
Annie looks down as he speaks, but he gently lifts her chin to meet her gaze again.
“All them years ago, I told you what I wanted. It’s nobody else out here for me, Antoinette. I told you I wanted to spend my life with you. I still want that with you, and I’ll do whatever it takes to get there.”
It’s then that her tears begin to fall. She pushes at his chest with her free hand, and he comes up to grab it.
“Today’s supposed to be fun, and you got me cryin’ before I even said hello to anybody.”
Elijah chuckles softly, pulling her back into his arms. “You still the most beautiful girl here,” he says, his hands cupping her face as he wiped her tears.
He places a soft kiss on her forehead before she rests her head against his chest. They stand there in each other’s embrace before Annie speaks again.
“I need you to mean it, Elijah,” she says softly.
“I do.”
She lets out a soft sigh.
“Good. Because you owe me a date, and I’ll be real upset if it goes well and you leave again.”
Elijah knows she’s serious even behind her lighthearted words, but he feels lighter knowing her spirits were lifting.
“So you finally sayin’ yes?”
She pulls back slightly, eyebrows furrowed.
“No. You gotta ask properly. Then I’ll say yes.”
Elijah just smiles and nods.
“Yes Ma’am.”