Archive of Our Own

“Hey, Grapes-ie,” says Agent Choi, swinging an arm around Kim Soleum’s shoulder. He smiles, light and casual. “I love you.”

The words are so nonchalant, Kim Soleum almost overlooks them. As it is, he’s not entirely sure how to react. Agent Choi’s cheeks may already be red from alcohol, but Kim Soleum doubts he’s drunk. Agent Choi had been the one to invite Kim Soleum to his apartment for a night of drinking, oddly just the two of them- but he’s been nursing a single can of beer for a while now. 

Still, devoid of any other context, Kim Soleum has no reason to believe this is anything other than his ever-ridiculous senior being obnoxiously affectionate to a junior he so missed. 

But…

The look in Agent Choi’s eyes is- not quite resigned. Settled, perhaps. As though he’s come to terms with an answer he doesn’t want but knows to expect. 

It’s odd. Kim Soleum swallows, not quite sure what to say. 

“No response?” Agent Choi adds, his voice still as jovial as ever. “My junior is so cruel…”

“I…” Kim Soleum just swallowed, but somehow his throat still feels dry. “I wouldn’t have stayed if I didn’t care for all of you.”

“‘All of us’, hm?” A hint of bitterness in Agent Choi’s voice. 

“…”

Perhaps this really is a love confession. 

It’s… not something that Kim Soleum ever expected, especially from Agent Choi. To be clear, he doesn’t see anything wrong with it. Everyone’s different, and regardless, he feels it would be rather silly to be hung up on it in a world of ghost stories. He has- friends- 

(It still doesn’t feel quite right to admit that. But he’s chosen to stay in this world he saved from destruction, and he’s chosen to accept he cherishes the people he stayed for.)

-who are thoroughly contaminated, helplessly abnormal even if humanity still lives within them. In comparison, simply preferring men doesn’t register as even unusual.   

But he supposes part of him still superimposes Agent Choi with the tales of the Bureau’s early agents. It can’t really be helped, not when he so exemplifies their virtues. The Darkness Exploration Records didn’t focus on romance except as ghost story fodder, but agents were still, well- they made Kim Soleum vaguely think of action flicks with copious explosions and steamy romances… with women. 

“C’mon now,” says Agent Choi. He leans in, his eyes piercing- their blue doesn’t even waver. “Your senior is a tough guy. He can take a rejection or two. Just go for it, eh?”

For a moment, anger simmers in him. Things had been going well. He was barely a month into his return to Black Tortoise Team 1, and it was- everything was so very normal. 

(Devastatingly comfortable, despite the blood Agent Choi would sometimes cough into tissues, the leg Agent Bronze only had through a dokkaebi flame- 

Despite the memories of a world Kim Soleum chose to abandon still haunting him.)

So why would Agent Choi choose to wreck that careful normalcy? He must know what Kim Soleum’s response would be. With how skilled he is at reading people, Agent Choi shouldn’t need Kim Soleum to reject him explicitly. 

This is one secret Kim Soleum would’ve never suspected if Agent Choi hadn’t told him, so why-

-His vague anger fades like the wind. 

Agent Choi still told him, despite Kim Soleum never suspecting otherwise. He revealed a secret he could’ve kept close to his heart, airing it out for Kim Soleum to see and judge as he pleased. 

That means something in itself. 

“My apologies,” says Kim Soleum, quiet. “I don’t see you in that way.”

Relief, oddly enough, blooms in Agent Choi’s gaze. He shifts back, his warm embrace falling from Kim Soleum’s shoulders- and promptly rips a clear plastic bag out from a jacket pocket. 

Kim Soleum blinks. 

“Thanks,” Agent Choi says breezily, opening the bag with a crinkle- it’s a plastic zipper bag, resealable. The kind of bag they’d use to store items with potential contamination. 

He hacks, a raspy guttural sound, and blood splatters into the bag- Kim Soleum jerks up like a rod.

“Agent?!” 

Agent Choi hacks again, and again, and again, each cough increasingly wretched. More blood splatters the bag- Kim Soleum’s hand draws to Agent Choi’s back in a poor pastiche of comfort. 

This has happened before. Kim Soleum knows Agent Choi’s body is… something of a mess from the payment the Tiger General demanded of him. His lantern helps, but there’s some things a dokkaebi flame’s mere recreation doesn’t entirely cover. 

But it’s never been quite this bad. Kim Soleum’s other hand slips to his phone- Agent Choi clearly needs medical attention, and Kim Soleum means to call for it. 

That’s when a blood-stained petal falls into the bag. 

Kim Soleum pauses. For a moment, he wonders if he’s seeing things- but then another yellow petal follows the first. A third. A fourth. 

Then with a loud, retching cough, an entire head of a tulip is hacked into the bag Agent Choi holds with a white-knuckled grip. 

“Sunbae?!”

“Haha, sorry for the scare,” says Agent Choi, voice raspy. “I’m all cured now though.”

“From what?” Kim Soleum demands, but Agent Choi is already back at hacking up flowers. A second tulip joins the first, speckled with blood from its stem to its head. 

It’s obviously some kind of supernatural phenomenon, but he can’t recall anything similar in the Darkness Exploration Records. There’s plenty of Darknesses that involve flowers, and even contaminating human bodies with them: but none that fit with the current situation. This was clearly triggered the moment Kim Soleum rejected Agent Choi. 

…One fictional disease does come to mind. A melodramatic romance trope, one that any number of contributors certainly could’ve proposed in draft to the wiki.  

But from what he can recall of the hanahakibyong - the flower-retching disease - it would only heal when the feelings were requited. Kim Soleum just rejected Agent Choi. Was this something different after all? 

He rubs circles on Agent Choi’s back as he continues to cough up flowers. Agent Choi goes at for some minutes, long enough that Kim Soleum considers calling the Bureau after all- but finally, bag three-quarters full of blood-stained yellow tulips, he zips it closed. 

A deep, breathy inhale- then Agent Choi barks out a raspy laugh. “My lungs haven’t felt this clear in at least five years.”  

Five years? 

They just spent the last year desperately trying to avert the apocalypse. A good half-year before that, Kim Soleum was scrambling to survive after his return in a questionable body. The three years prior, Kim Soleum was nowhere to be found in this world. 

So five years ago was before Kim Soleum left. 

Five years ago was when Kim Soleum had been trapped in Sekwang Special City. 

Five years ago was when Agent Choi pleaded for him to-

“-No need to furrow your brow like that.” Agent Choi’s raspy voice cuts through his thoughts. His smile is as easy and as false as ever. “I made my own choices. And so did you, eh? I doubt you’d ever regret it either way.”

…It’s true. But Kim Soleum stays silent.

He doubts Agent Choi would’ve just let that slip. Was it a ploy for more sympathy? An attempt to change Kim Soleum’s mind? But Kim Soleum knows Agent Choi is sharp enough to understand that petty manipulations like that wouldn’t work. 

Perhaps, in the end, Agent Choi just wanted Kim Soleum to know. 

(He can still feel guilt at decisions he doesn’t regret.)

Another cough escapes Agent Choi's throat, but no blood or flowers accompany it this time. With a low grunt, he hoists himself up to his feet. 

Kim Soleum’s hand slips to the floor. 

Agent Choi shakes his bag of bloodstained tulips, acting perfectly nonchalant. “I’d better go get this cleared at the Bureau. Let’s end things here for tonight.”

“I’ll-” Kim Soleum starts, scrambling to his feet as well. 

“-I’d rather go alone, Soleum-ah.” 

Agent Choi’s voice is rough, even beyond its raspiness. 

Kim Soleum’s mouth falls shut. 

Perhaps Agent Choi knew it was coming. Perhaps he was relieved to be free of whatever curse afflicted his lungs. 

But none of it changed the fact that Kim Soleum just rejected him tonight. 

So Kim Soleum nods. 

Agent Choi’s lips twist up into a bitter smile. “Don’t worry about cleaning up,” he says, waving at the mess of cans and half-empty plates of homemade dishes on the table. “I’ll deal with it later.”

“…I’ll clean up.”

“Haha. How diligent.” The praise is clearly hollow. “Anyway, tell me early if you’re gonna quit. There’ll be piles of paperwork for me to file.”

Huh?

That- settled look is back in Agent Choi’s eyes. There’s not an ounce of doubt in them- as though he’s already certain of what’s to come. 

Already certain that Kim Soleum would leave. 

Kim Soleum’s hands squeeze, then open. He swallows, then- 

“Sunbae,” he says, firm. “I’ll see you at work tomorrow.”

Agent Choi’s eyes widen. He coughs once, then turns. 

“Alright. See you then.”

His voice cracks. 

Kim Soleum tries not to notice. 

The apocalypse came, and went. 

Kim Soleum tried and failed to stop it from coming at all, but the world was still saved in the end. The ghost stories that fill this world have been defanged- child-proofed, through the Cheerful Research Institute’s lifelong work. And the ones too dangerous for a cheery veneer to fix at least now have a dreamy barrier between them and the world. 

(Braun is one of those who’ve been partially blocked from the waking world. He can see it - Kim Soleum usually still carries his pink plush bunny in his front pocket, and he has no doubt Braun can follow him regardless - but he only speaks now in dreams and Darknesses. Still, Braun hasn’t changed much aside from that. 

At the end of the day, Kim Soleum can’t help but be glad for it. He knows the Late-Night Talk Show is still a danger- but he’s lost so much. At least he still has one good friend who’s stayed the same.)

Until the very end, Kim Soleum fully intended to return home. He fought because he found he couldn’t abandon those he grew to care for- but that didn’t mean he wanted to live out his life in the world of a ghost story, no matter that it’s been sanitized. 

But when he faced that lower-rung [Name]-nim, when he demanded it fulfill its side of the deal they struck… he couldn’t accept its twisted offer in the end. He should’ve understood the danger of dealing with supernatural entities, much less a god from a pantheon devoted to suffering, and yet he had still been taken aback. 

Back in his original body as he was, he was no longer missing memories of his family, his friends, his entire life in a normal world. But the cost for Kim Soleum’s return home… when he glanced back at everyone he had desperately struggled to survive with until moments prior, frozen in time from the [Name]-nim’s temporal block-

(When his eyes flitted over Agent Choi, and he thought of Looky Mart-)

-he bitterly found the cost was more than he was willing to bear. 

And he realized, simultaneously. He would never escape this ghost story. So long as there was danger, he would want to leave- but so long as there was danger, he would find himself returning. Because there was too much he cared for in this world now. Too much to just close his eyes and forget. 

So he stayed. 

He still doubts he can build that home that Agent Bronze pleaded he could, that Agent Choi begged him to consider. He’s still not entirely sure if he wants to try. 

Kim Soleum misses his family. It’s easier to reconcile within him now he can actually remember what’s causing his desperate longing- but he still misses them. His silly little sister, his cheery little brother- his awkward but caring mother and quiet father. 

It’s laughable. When he left home to work full time, he was so eager to put them behind him. He thought the weekly dinners were a chore, sighed about his mother calling him and his father texting him. He was always glad for the packed banchan his mother would push at him as he stepped out the door, but he never thought to properly cherish it. 

Now, he’d have dinner with them every night without complaint, if only he could.

But there were times in this world when he was happy, despite all the danger, despite his ever-longing for home. In Squad D, scrambling to clear Darknesses in record time to save himself from fright, everyone laughing together after. In Black Tortoise Team 1’s waiting room, tapping away at a report as an obnoxious senior makes silly comments over his shoulder. 

So when Agent Bronze invited him back to the Bureau, when Agent Choi nodded with an easy smile as well, despite the utter lack of expectation in his eyes-

What else could he do but say yes?

Kim Soleum suffers from nightmares, but it’s thankfully rare that he remembers them. He’s woken up with a gasp more than once, fading memories of miserable horrors haunting him, but he’s faced too many true frights for false ones to leave too lasting of a mark. 

It’s a different matter when his dreams blend with Darknesses, however. 

[My. I wouldn’t have thought that poverty-struck agent saw you quite like that.] 

Braun’s words are cruelly delighted. While he never quite despised Agent Choi, not like Lee Jaheon, it was obvious Agent Choi’s flippant attitude always grated on him. It’s no surprise he’s revelling in Agent Choi’s- well, failure today. 

Kim Soleum opens his eyes- and immediately slams them back shut, regretting everything. 

Aargh! 

He knows this is a dream. Probably. Mostly. But with Braun around right now, what he sees won’t fade quite as easily from his mind… 

[How rude. Your good friend came all this way to support you…] 

And of course he appreciates it. But he’ll never get used to horrors. 

A blood-red sky, eerie shadows floating across it- a field of blood-stained tulips all around him. As he shifts, he can feel the disgusting stickiness of half-dried blood on the flowers he’s crushing. 

Kim Soleum takes a deep breath- then another. One more. He steadies his heart the best he can, and finally cracks his eyes back open. 

…He still wants to scream. But he needs to stay aware of his surroundings- the line between dream and Darkness is thin now, and dream-Darknesses are far less child-proofed than in the waking world. 

[As they should! The ratings committees are truly out of line these days… there’s far more to showbiz than simple shows for children.]

He’s used to hearing Braun’s complaints about it by now- he lets them wash over him. Instead, Kim Soleum turns a sharp eye onto his surroundings. The lighting is eerily red-tinged, but it’s still more than bright enough to make out tulips as far as the eye can see. 

Yellow, blood-stained tulips. 

…He won’t let his guard down, but he’s putting his bets on this being a nightmare and not a Darkness. 

[Perhaps so! Though I find it rather incomprehensible that you’d let that agent’s petty disease affect you at all.]

Kim Soleum turns his gaze up at the sky to speak- then sees a dark cloud shift into an imperceivable shape and immediately reconsiders, staring back down at the flower-filled ground instead. 

“Do you know what that disease was?” 

[My, didn’t you already mention it yourself? But as a good friend, I’m always happy to refresh your memory. It’s the flower-retching disease, of course.]

Hanahaki? It really was that melodramatic romance trope?

[A rather pathetic disease, really. It only impacts cowards. So long as one has a love they refuse to convey, flowers will grow endlessly in their lungs… until they gain the courage to confess and receive a proper answer in return.]

[Or until they fall out of love, of course!]

The variant Braun describes is a little kinder than the hanahaki Kim Soleum knows, but thankfully so. In retrospect, Agent Choi wouldn’t have bothered to confess if he knew a rejection wouldn’t heal him. 

[Quite so. It’s good that agent at least knows his place. Mr. Roe Deer, you’re destined for far greater things than to languish by the side of a mere public servant.]

[That’s why you rejected him, no?]

“No, nothing like that.” Kim Soleum is a ‘mere’ public servant as well now, and he already intends to ‘languish’ by Agent Choi’s side for now. “It was just… I mean, he’s a guy.”

[…Is that so?]

Braun sounds a little disbelieving, so Kim Soleum scrambles to justify himself. 

“Gender is pretty important in a partner to most humans, you know.”

And Kim Soleum knows he’s not gay. He hasn’t had too many crushes in the past, but all of them have been on women. To be clear, he isn’t blind by any means. Objectively, Agent Choi has decent enough looks, and he’s attractive in most other aspects as well. But that’s not something Kim Soleum has ever paid much attention to, because he doesn’t like Agent Choi like that. 

[Hm. Of course, of course. You know, my friend, if you’re looking for a partner, I’d be overjoyed to introduce you to some lovely women in my audience. I’ve been getting a few regulars these days who certainly know how to work up a crowd!]

“Thanks, but I’m good,” Kim Soleum is quick to say. He really isn’t looking for a romantic relationship, and it’s a blatant attempt to tie him back to the talk show either way. 

[If you’re certain! The offer is always open.]

[Especially if you find yourself considering whether to give that poverty-struck agent a chance.]

He just rejected Agent Choi, and for good reason. Kim Soleum frowns. “Where is this coming from?” 

[Nowhere at all, really. But your good friend is prepared to help in even the unlikeliest of situations!]

“Right. Of course.”

…Maybe Braun is just hoping to see Agent Choi suffer more. 

When Kim Soleum clocks into work the next morning - a full fifteen minutes early - both of his seniors are already lounging away on the waiting room’s couches. A new vase is sitting on the table between them- it’s a beautiful celadon vase, a smooth jade green adorned with swooping white strokes of a tiger. 

Unfortunately, it’s rather marred by the blood-speckled yellow tulips carelessly plopped into it. 

“Sunbae,” says Kim Soleum, a little incredulous, “Is that…?”

Ryu Jaekwan rubs at his forehead and sighs. “I told him to throw them out.”

“The Equipment Management Team gave their sign-off,” Agent Choi says brightly. His voice is still a little raspy, but he surprisingly doesn’t seem to be forcing his cheer. “They even let me borrow a spare vase. How kind!” Only after Agent Choi needled them into it, no doubt. “Don’t worry, they’re perfectly normal flowers.”

“They’re blood-stained,” Ryu Jaekwan says, unamused. 

“It gives them character!” 

“It seems rather unsanitary,” Kim Soleum agrees, heading to the couches. He sits himself down next to Agent Choi on the lumpy couch, eyeing the vase with something of a doubtful look. 

“They’ve been fully decontaminated,” Agent Choi insists. He throws Kim Soleum a grin. “Besides, we should have something to commemorate our dear junior's return!”

Kim Soleum gives the vase another doubtful look. Symbolism is often important when it comes to supernatural phenomena: it likely meant something that it had been yellow tulips blooming in Agent Choi. So he looked up their meaning last night as he was walking home from Agent Choi’s apartment. 

Pointless, fruitless love. Loving in vain. Love that would never be fulfilled. 

He’s not so sure how he feels about that. Kim Soleum knows Agent Choi has always cared too much: but somehow, it still feels strange to realize Agent Choi held onto a love he so vividly thought was unrequited. It’s utterly irrational, and Agent Choi has always been rational in Kim Soleum’s experience. 

But he supposes it’s far easier to do the rational thing than to actually feel it. 

(Agent Choi has always been dedicated to his juniors. So Kim Soleum never stopped to consider that Agent Choi’s devotion could be something more than just his shining determination as an early-era agent. That Agent Choi could care for him more than just as another civilian to save, another coworker to protect.

That, too, feels strange.)  

“Agent Grapes returned an entire month ago,” Ryu Jaekwan says, as utterly merciless as ever when it comes to his unserious senior. “And this is a rather morbid choice for commemoration.” 

Kim Soleum fully agrees. Go, Agent Bronze! 

“Well, he might’ve still left,” says Agent Choi. “But it seems like our Grapes-ie has decided to stick around a little longer this time, eh?”

Agent Choi reaches out to ruffle Kim Soleum’s hair- he closes his eyes automatically, but a second passes, two, and he doesn’t feel an obnoxious ruffle. Kim Soleum cracks an eye back open, questioning. Agent Choi’s hair is paused mid-air between them, as though it’s frozen in time. 

For a moment, there’s something of a confused look on Agent Choi’s face as he meets Kim Soleum’s gaze- but it’s soon wiped away with a smile, and he ruffles Kim Soleum’s hair. It’s more aggressive than usual- he grouches internally as he fixes his hair back up.  

Ryu Jaekwan sighs deeply. “He said he would, didn’t he? How many times did I tell you telling him wouldn’t change anything?”

Kim Soleum jerks up, his hair still askew. “You knew about Agent Choi’s condition?”

Somehow, he thought Agent Choi wouldn’t have told anyone unless he needed to, especially in the workplace. But he supposes Ryu Jaekwan is different. 

“Of course,” Ryu Jaekwan says. “I kept telling him to get over his pride, to admit he missed you and wanted you back. He’s done it before.” He coughs once, a touch of red to his cheeks. “Perhaps it’s embarrassing, but I’m still more than happy to say I love you as my junior as well, Agent Grapes.” 

…Ah. So he doesn’t know. 

“I wouldn’t have stayed if I didn’t care for all of you,” Kim Soleum quickly offers. 

If it isn’t broken, don’t fix it! He may have just used those exact same words last night, but it isn’t as though they aren’t true! Ryu Jaekwan seems satisfied enough, at least. 

Kim Soleum glances over at Agent Choi, but he’s studiously avoiding Kim Soleum’s gaze. 

“Haha,” Agent Choi laughs freely. “Hey, it all worked out in the end.”

Well, that’s the type of person Agent Choi is. He keeps his feelings close to his chest, even from those he cares for the most. Would he have ever told Kim Soleum how he felt if the hanahaki hadn’t forced his hand?

Kim Soleum doubts it. 

(He feels a little stupid now for reading any trust in Agent Choi’s confession.) 

“Anyway, Jaekwan-ah. Now that Grapes-ie is here, wanna go grab the manuals for today?” 

“I believe it was your turn,” Ryu Jaekwan says.

“C’mon.” Agent Choi says, drawing his hands together in apology and winking. “Throw a bone to your recovering senior?”

Ryu Jaekwan’s eyes flick to the blood-stained tulips, and Kim Soleum can see him relent in real time. With a sigh, he hoists himself up off the couch. 

“I’ll be right back,” he says, and heads out the exit. 

The moment the door shuts behind him, Agent Choi throws an arm around Kim Soleum’s shoulders and smiles, leaning close. 

Kim Soleum’s stomach drops. It’s no closer than Agent Choi usually is, but- of course he’s a little more conscious of it, now that he knows how Agent Choi sees him. 

“I still would’ve told you,” Agent Choi says, and immediately Kim Soleum forgets any lingering feelings of awkwardness. 

He stares at Agent Choi with a frown. 

“It’s painted all over your face,” Agent Choi continues. His lips quirk up, obnoxiously smug. “You were disappointed, eh? That I didn’t tell you a special little secret just because I wanted to. I did though.” 

Kim Soleum is fairly sure that nothing is showing on his face, but he digresses. 

“You didn’t even tell Agent Bronze,” he says. “Why would you tell me?”

“Because I wouldn’t have wanted that Sword of Damocles floating over me,” Agent Choi says, voice going still. “Because if you were gonna use that as an excuse to leave, I would’ve wanted it to be on my own terms.”  

He’s still smiling, but the light is gone from his eyes. 

“I…” Kim Soleum trails off. “I already said I’m staying.” 

“You did,” Agent Choi agrees. “What was it again? You’ll stay, because this world is too dangerous? You’d worry too much about people you care about here?” 

“…”

“It was an emotional moment, eh? Jaekwan-ie even shed a tear,” continues Agent Choi. “But you know. I noticed the caveat.” A bitter chuckle. “You’ll stay because the world is dangerous. So once you feel the world is safe enough, you’ll leave. And hey! We just finished making sure the world was gonna be safe.”

That wasn’t what he…

“Maybe dealing with the gods didn’t work out, but you still have the connections you need to nab a Wish Ticket or two, don’t you?” Agent Choi shifts back from Kim Soleum, draws his arms up into a lazy shrug. “That new eyepatched director sure does owe you a few favours.” 

It’s true, but-

“You didn’t lie when you said you like it more here than in Daydream. It’s cutthroat there, and you like saving people, even if it makes you scared,” Agent Choi continues. “But we’ll never convince you to value here over your h-”

“-I’d ask you don’t put words in my mouth, Agent Choi,” Kim Soleum cuts in. 

“Haha. Mad I hit the nail on the head?”

“This world will never be safe enough.”

Agent Choi laughs again, low and rough. “Don’t lie, Soleum-ah.”

Why doesn’t he understand? Isn’t it obvious? It doesn’t matter how safe this world becomes, how much they confirm the new child-proofed Darknesses are here to stay. There will always be some danger. 

And as long as there’s some danger, as long as someone out there is calling for rescue-

Kim Soleum’s hand desperately clenches onto Agent Choi’s collar. 

-Agent Choi will run straight into it. 

“How can I leave when you’re still here?”

And Agent Choi’s mouth slams shut. He blinks at him, then blinks again, shockingly like a deer in headlights for a man who’s so loath to run. 

A spot of red rises on his cheeks. 

“You-” Agent Choi tries. “Soleum-ah-” His voice sounds strangled. “Grapes-ie,” he finally chokes out. He sighs roughly, pulling Kim Soleum’s hand off of him. “I understand what you mean. But I wish you phrased it a little differently. My junior really has no mercy on his poor lovelorn senior…”

“I know you can handle it, sunbae-nim.”

Besides, he’s certain he needed to go at least that far for Agent Choi to trust his words. Kim Soleum truly doesn’t intend to return home, as much as it aches- but in the end, he supposes it’s unsurprising Agent Choi finds that so doubtful. 

“Ack, no pity either.” Agent Choi laughs- it’s a little awkward, but nothing more. “Fine, fine, I see how it is. That’s alright too, I guess.” He shifts up from the couch, brushing non-existent dust off his pants. “Anyway, we should get things ready. Jaekwan-ie will give us an earful if he comes back and nothing’s done…” 

Kim Soleum nods. 

“And Soleum-ah?” Agent Choi glances back. “You won’t get a fourth chance.” 

“I won’t need one.”

And Agent Choi snorts, looking away. “Alright. We’ll see.” 

The past month has been a mess of work. The Supernatural Disaster Management Bureau has hundreds upon hundreds of disaster manuals, and almost all of them are now inaccurate. Given the glut of new information needed, the Black Tortoise teams have been conscripted to work with the White Tiger teams for the foreseeable future. Rescue is still the priority, but it’s difficult to do without first rebuilding a baseline. 

This new baseline is mostly for the better, but not always. ‘Child-friendly’ doesn’t necessarily mean ‘safe’- they’ve already run into more than one Darkness that’s decided to keep its visitors inside a pleasant dream forever. Child-friendly, however, does mean that everything stays strictly R12-rated at most, much to Kim Soleum’s joy. No more creepy ghosts, no more jumpscares, no more bloody gore. 

…Unless he enters a dream Darkness. There’s usually a smaller risk of permanent contamination or death in dreams, but in exchange the Darkness remains as terrifying as ever. But this last month, he’s only ever entered dream Darknesses for rescue operations, not simple redocumentation purposes.  

He suspects Agent Choi is to blame. Kim Soleum knows Agent Choi has long since guessed he’s a coward- and Agent Choi seems more than happy to cater to it, so long as it doesn’t risk human lives. 

(Kim Soleum thought it was pure pragmatism before: the more Kim Soleum enjoys his work, the less likely he is to leave, and the more people who are saved. 

Now, he realizes Agent Choi may have also let his personal feelings interfere with his decision-making.)

The Darkness he’s entered today was originally an occasional maintenance target. 

[Under Construction]

: A ghost story featured in <Darkness Exploration Records>

: Supernatural Disaster Management Bureau registration number - 0542PSYA.2012.나4.

A bizarre phenomenon that occurs when a death occurs at a construction site. A total of nine victims are drawn into a false version of the construction site every day, precisely when construction is scheduled to begin. 

It is classified by the Bureau as a Fracture-sanctioned Disaster, as it is responsible for over two hundred known disappearances over the last decade.

Criteria for victim-selection is unclear, but salarymen standing within a hundred-metre radius of the site at the scheduled time appear to be more frequently chosen. However, should the area around the construction site be cleared such that it only has a small number of victims to choose from, the site will expand its radius in search for more choices. 

Victims are instructed to carry out tasks at the false construction site, which will be surrounded by a large, insurmountable concrete wall during the work day. Tasks become progressively more absurd and inhumane as the day proceeds. At the end of the work day, most victims are permitted to leave via an exit that appears in the wall. 

However, victims who fail to complete enough tasks will instead be taken into the foreman’s office for a lecture. 

It is unknown what happens to victims who stay. 

The phenomenon stops once construction on the real construction site is either completed or fully demolished.  

Even for the Supernatural Disaster Management Bureau, it’s difficult for them to order a construction site in the middle of Seoul be immediately demolished and the land condemned. Instead, they typically request the company temporarily adjust its construction hours to a time with less traffic. Then, they send agents disguised as salarymen in the hopes they’re picked. 

Through this technique, they’ve succeeded in leaving enough instructional pamphlets in the Disaster that its death rate is now considered ‘acceptable’. A typical example of the Bureau’s strict triage- Kim Soleum didn’t return to the Bureau with any misconceptions about its true nature, no matter how easy it is to forget when faced with Agent Choi’s dazzling smile. 

(He knows what the Bureau has officially classified him as. Agent Choi showed him and Agent Bronze once, laughing at the ridiculousness of it all. But it’s fine- he isn’t at the Bureau because of higher-ups. 

He’s here for the good he can do as an agent.) 

Yesterday, the Bureau noticed another construction site with an accidental death. Thus, seeing it as an opportunity to reassess the Disaster's danger level, they sent out a mass of agents dressed as salarymen to mill around one hour before construction was adjusted to begin. Black Tortoise Team 1 was among them. 

Knowing his luck, Kim Soleum suspected he would be chosen as a victim. 

He was. 

Unfortunately, so was Agent Choi. 

[What a disgustingly smug expression. He’s thinking too highly of himself after you needlessly indulged him earlier. As your friend, I would recommend you put him in his place…]

Kim Soleum didn’t say anything he didn’t mean to. But that doesn’t mean he wants to see Agent Choi in a Darkness like this. 

“Haha, Grapes-ie, no need to look so obviously annoyed.”

“Shouldn’t you be focusing on your tasks?”

“When you do.”

Kim Soleum just holds back a sigh, and continues pretending to move debris to the dumpster. 

They arrived around an hour back, the only agents: thankfully, the civilians were easy enough to wrangle, memories of the apocalypse that wasn’t still fresh enough in their mind to keep them in line.

They’ve already succeeded in confirming the child-proofing is in effect. The foreman is meant to be a walking corpse, mirroring the state of their body in real life- instead, he looked healthy enough. The sole oddity is the large plastic flower that’s taken the place of a hole in his chest, but it’s arranged naturally enough even Kim Soleum didn't feel his stomach turn. 

In order to fully gauge the current state of the Disaster, however, they need someone to fail to complete enough tasks to escape. 

Agent Choi tosses a chunk of debris up in a hand. “How about we fail together?” 

Kim Soleum nods. It’s better to cooperate at least outwardly for now. 

“You really don’t want to, huh? Haha.” Agent Choi tosses the debris back in the pile behind them- then picks another back up. They aren’t being actively watched, and the civilians have been assigned elsewhere: but the manual says the foreman can sense when a worker is doing nothing at all. 

Agent Choi shrugs. “Well, it’s not like I don’t get it. But I feel like you get worse in Disasters like this. Y’know, ones with unmapped regions.” 

Because Agent Choi gets needlessly reckless in Darknesses like this! 

It isn’t as though it’s vital they fully explore this Darkness. It’s likely every civilian here today will survive, especially if they confirm the afternoon tasks are no longer as gruesome as they were before. If Agent Bronze were here, Kim Soleum has no doubt he’d agree. 

It is classified by the Bureau as a Fracture-sanctioned Disaster, as it is responsible for over two hundred known disappearances over the last decade.

…This Darkness has been as good as abandoned by the Bureau. Anyone who falls in and refuses to follow the Bureau’s instructions is no longer deemed as a candidate for rescue. And reasonably so. The Bureau doesn’t have enough agents to waste them on a Darkness with a relatively low death rate. 

Still. 

It would be nice to deal with it for good, if they could. 

Kim Soleum tosses a piece of debris halfway to the dumpster, and thinks.

“Agent Choi,” he finally says. “I have an idea.”

The exploration records for [Under Construction] were mainly focused on the disgusting, horrific tasks the foreman would force workers to complete in order to escape. None, however, mention the entity that must be behind the foreman- its records generally favoured cheap thrills through a horrifying monster. 

But…

“This is a construction site,” says Kim Soleum. “It’s not the foreman who’s really in charge. It’s the site manager.”

“Disasters don’t always follow human rules.”

“Yes,” Kim Soleum acknowledges. “But I strongly suspect a site manager does exist.” 

The reason being: the eerie foreman’s office is implied to actually be the site manager's office. While no one has entered the office and survived, one exploration record notes hearing an unfamiliar man’s voice from the office after the unproductive workers were escorted in. Another record reports seeing a placard for an unfamiliar name on the office door- the same record comments that foremen don’t typically have offices.  

In addition, this Darkness has no set location, reappearing with a new foreman whenever a death occurs on a construction site. However, if multiple construction sites meet the criteria for manifestation, only one is active. 

As though there’s a single site manager unable to monitor more than one site at a time. 

“And,” Kim Soleum continues, “I suspect it wants to quit.”

The key lies in its choice of victims. The Bureau’s manual only notes the Darkness generally selects salarymen: but the Darkness Exploration Records, with civilian perspectives as well, paint a fuller picture. Auditors and inspectors are unusually well-represented in its victims- but also actors, fraudsters, and other professions that require some form of deception.

Of all the agents present around the site, was it just coincidence that it was specifically him and Agent Choi drawn into the Disaster? 

Kim Soleum doubts it. 

Many agents are good at deception in the Bureau: but how many would risk stepping out of line for a snowball’s chance at destroying a Disaster? It’s more likely that the Darkness saw him and Agent Choi as the most capable liars among the crowd- the most willing to deceive even their ‘manager’ to shut down the site. In the absence of an actual inspector, a trickster is seen as good enough.  

“If the manual is still accurate, we will have a thirty-minute ‘lunch’ break in approximately two hours,” Kim Soleum says. “The foreman won’t monitor our locations during that time.” He flashes a smile at Agent Choi. “That’s when we can destroy this Disaster.”

They wrangle up a clipboard and papers from an abandoned corner of the site, and knock on the door to the site manager’s office halfway into their lunch break, posing as surprise inspectors from the Ministry of Employment and Labour. 

The site manager has what Kim Soleum has begun to dub ‘cheap censorship’: when an entity is so utterly horrifying that the child-proofing gives up and just makes it look like a nebulous blob of light. Kim Soleum isn’t complaining, however. He suspects conquering this Darkness would’ve originally risked madness from the close proximity of the manager. 

But as it is, they complete their inspection without issue, noting several workplace safety violations to successfully shut down the site a full four hours earlier than scheduled. The exit appears in the insurmountable concrete wall, and everyone eagerly races out- including the site manager and foreman. 

Though thankfully neither are anywhere to be seen once Kim Soleum steps back out onto the street. 

The civilians would likely have their memories erased, but that’s not a job for Black Tortoise Team 1. Once they’ve confirmed every civilian has successfully escaped, they retreat to a bench in a nearby park for a breather. 

It’s early evening in a quiet neighbourhood, red and orange streaking the sky above them. The park is fairly empty. 

“Haha, the Destruction King still hasn't lost his edge, eh?” Grinning wide, Agent Choi pats Kim Soleum’s back. “What’s this, the third one since you came back?”

“We don’t know for certain this Disaster is resolved,” Kim Soleum points out. 

Even if the Darkness doesn’t trigger tomorrow morning, the Bureau would need to wait until the next death on a construction site to confirm it’s been completely destroyed. Though with the amount of reconstruction going on right now, Kim Soleum unfortunately predicts it won’t take long to confirm. 

“I’m sure it is,” Agent Choi says glibly. “But it’s a great accomplishment either way.” He fishes his phone out from his pocket, checks the time. “We entered the Disaster at two- we should’ve left at around ten at best, but it’s still only six. Lemme text Jaekwan-ie… and the agent anonymous group chat…”

“Is the last thing necessary?”

“Of course!”

As expected, Agent Choi ignores him. For someone who apparently loves him, Agent Choi still tends to just do whatever he pleases…

“Don’t pout, Grapes-ie,” Agent Choi says, falsely. Kim Soleum is frowning at best. “I’ll skip the group chat if you really want, but I want everyone to know my junior’s accomplishments!”

He glances back at Kim Soleum, his smile softening, his eyes crinkling. 

Ah. 

Kim Soleum knows that Agent Choi has been working behind the scenes to ensure his smooth reintegration into the Bureau. The role he played in averting the apocalypse isn’t widely known- outside of the Bureau’s top, he’s still seen primarily as a former Daydream employee and spy. 

As embarrassing as it feels, this kind of positive propaganda is probably part of Agent Choi’s efforts to bring him back into the Bureau fold. 

Kim Soleum looks away. 

“I do appreciate it,” he says quietly. “Especially when you thought I’d leave.”

Who would go to all that effort for a junior they thought wouldn’t stay? Agent Choi, of course. He would never do anything less. 

“Even once you go, I don’t want them to speak badly of you.”

Kim Soleum frowns. “I’m not-”

“-Right, right. Sorry,” Agent Choi cuts in. He laughs, though there’s a bit of an edge to it. “Force of habit.” 

“…Right.”

They both fall silent for a few moments. Kim Soleum flicks on his phone as well- he’s missed a few messages. He should probably respond. 

“There’s a good barbecue place nearby,” Agent Choi finally says, cutting through the awkward silence. “We can do the full debrief tomorrow- how about dinner for now? My treat. Jaekwan-ie’s all done too, so I invited him to come over.”

“You don’t need to bribe me,” says Kim Soleum. “I’ll join.”

“Ah, good. My wallet’s actually a bit tight this month.”

Kim Soleum can’t help but laugh. “Really, sunbae?”

“My toilet broke last week,” Agent Choi laments. “Wouldn’t stop flushing by itself. I had to pay for a plumber…”

“That’s unfortunate.”

“Mm.” Agent Choi hoists himself back on the bench, gazing up at the orange sky. “Jaekwan-ie won’t be here for another thirty minutes or so, so we have some time to kill.” He smiles lazily, his eyes shifting back to Kim Soleum. “Why don’t we chat a bit?”

Kim Soleum is getting a bad feeling about this. “Aren’t we already?”

“About those prophetic records of yours,” Agent Choi clarifies. “The ones you’re using to destroy these Disasters.”

“…”

In all honesty, it’s more surprising they haven’t had a proper conversation about it yet. When Kim Soleum told Agent Choi the full truth, they weren’t in any real state to discuss it deeply: the apocalypse was in full swing, and what they could do with the knowledge was more important than the exact details. 

This discussion is well overdue, unfortunately. 

“I gotta say, I’m curious,” continues Agent Choi. “Which Darkness did me in? Obviously, it’s one with a dangerous unmapped region, but that doesn’t narrow things down much.” He hums. “If I had to guess… Looky Mart? In a world without you, Jaekwan-ie might’ve died there.” His voice is flat, matter-of-fact. “And I could’ve gotten desperate.”

Kim Soleum exhales, then nods curtly. “Your last words in the records were ‘Welcome to Looky Mart!’”

“Ha!” Agent Choi barks out a laugh. “I actually got it right?” His smile grows wry. “I was kinda hoping I didn’t.”

“That timeline doesn’t exist anymore.”

“But it could’ve,” says Agent Choi. “Was I still your favourite character, even with that stupid death?”

“No,” says Kim Soleum, and Agent Choi immediately jerks up, looking almost offended. 

“What? Then who is?” 

“I didn’t read the Darkness Exploration Records like that,” Kim Soleum explains. “I- well. I liked the horror, not the characters.”

He knows that some people enjoyed the wiki for the characters. There were discussion threads with thousands of posts arguing over Agent Choi’s ignoble death, countless pieces of fanart fantasizing over Viper or Employee D. But none of that was anything Kim Soleum ever paid attention to- he never really saw the appeal, in all honesty.  

(His little sister was more into that kind of thing. Kim Soleum’s chest throbs with pain at the reminder, but he pushes the memories out of his mind.)

Still…

“But I enjoyed reading your records the most,” Kim Soleum says truthfully. 

He always preferred reading about good people, about people who would try their very best to save whoever they could, even if they fail in the end. It’s part of why he was never that fond of the Church entries- at least Daydream had a good mix of morality in its employees. 

And early Bureau agents perfectly embodied that virtue. Agent Choi - both the shadow described in the records, and the real one sitting next to him in the flesh - is no different. 

Agent Choi rubs the back of his neck, quiet for a moment. 

“Soleum-ah,” he says. “You know I’m not whatever idealized agent was in those records, right?”

Hm?

“I think you’re misunderstanding something, sunbae,” says Kim Soleum. “You weren’t idealized in the records. It had all your failures. For example, I know about when you were a rookie agent and got trapped in a haunted painting for two days because you poked it out of curiosity.”

Agent Choi half-chokes. 

(Kim Soleum knows about Agent Choi’s biggest failures too. Cold Storage, for one. But there’s no way he wants to throw salt on that wound, so silly anecdotes it is.)

“There was a lot that wasn’t in the records too,” continues Kim Soleum. So many idiosyncrasies, so much personality that could never be fully conveyed through text alone. “But they still depicted you accurately.”

As a self-sacrificial, passionate agent who would do anything to save just one more person. 

Kim Soleum smiles at Agent Choi, and Agent Choi-

-buries his face in a hand. 

“Soleum,” he says, voice muffled, “I really love you.”

Mngh? 

Kim Soleum’s smile freezes, though he keeps his expression natural. Where is this coming from? 

“Ah, geez, the way you look at me… even at our worst, you’d always look at me like I hung up the stars at night,” Agent Choi laments. 

Is Agent Choi saying it’s Kim Soleum to blame?! He’s never looked at Agent Choi anything but normally. It’s clearly Agent Choi’s own fault for reading into things. 

“Haha. I guess I’m a bit of an egoist in the end,” Agent Choi continues. He draws his head back up from his hand, smiles stupidly softly at Kim Soleum. “Can’t say I hate hearing you sing my praises. But you know…” he slouches, his gaze shifting back forward. “I’m not as good a man as you think I am.”

Kim Soleum frowns, his mouth opening-

“Because if I was, I wouldn’t be so happy I’m shackling you down.”

-only to close. 

“This world is still a ghost story to you, isn’t it? It’s still somewhere you think you need to escape,” says Agent Choi. “But when you said you were only staying because you couldn’t trust me to stay safe… for a moment, I really wanted to get more reckless. Stupid, right?”

That isn’t exactly what Kim Soleum said, but as expected Agent Choi had successfully read through the lines regardless. 

He thinks of his little sister, her room in his memories always filled with trinkets from her latest obsession. Is she still into that one idol group? He doesn’t know.  

Kim Soleum will never know, so long as he stays here. 

He finds himself rubbing the back of his neck as well, looking away. 

“You wouldn’t have,” he just says. Agent Choi is too rational for that. 

“…Yeah. Still…” Agent Choi sighs. “Y’know, is it really completely either-or?” He waves his hands vaguely in the air. “Couldn’t you, I don’t know, connect your phone to the other world?”

Kim Soleum considered it before. Even with just a Wish Ticket as opposed to the true children’s syrup, there’s plenty it can accomplish. He could’ve asked it to allow his phone to call his family, requested a method to travel freely between the two worlds. But…

“It’s too risky to leave a path open.”

His world doesn’t have the Supernatural Disaster Management Bureau. It doesn’t even have Daydream. That isn’t an issue, because right now, its connections to worlds with ghost stories is minimal. But if Kim Soleum ripped open a permanent path, and some dangerous ghost story piggybacked off of it- 

His world would have no defenses.  

“Right, of course.” Agent Choi smiles wryly. “Sorry. I don’t know what I was thinking.”

“It wasn’t a bad idea.”

“Haha, it really was,” says Agent Choi. “But thanks anyway.” He stretches his arms high in the air, his back cracking. “So, barbecue. What’s your favourite cut of meat, Grapes-ie?”

And Kim Soleum lets Agent Choi draw him back into a gentler conversation. 

When Kim Soleum sleeps that night, he opens his eyes again to an endless field of bloodstained yellow tulips.  

Reoccurring dreams are generally a bad sign. Kim Soleum grimaces. 

Reluctantly, he glances around, ensuring he only gets brief glimpses of the sky after his scare last time. Little seems to have changed since yesterday, at least as far as he can tell. But…

There’s a single flower out of place by his feet. A tall, thin plant, filled with light pink blossoms that taper out at its tip- Kim Soleum doesn’t recognize it. The way it bunches up kind of reminds him of hyacinths? He’s no expert on flowers. 

[A baby snapdragon. It represents grace, strength, and deviousness: the perfect flower for you, my friend, wouldn’t you say?]

The baby snapdragon sways in a wind Kim Soleum can’t feel. 

Deviousness… his grimace deepens. Was today’s mission to blame for this? Some kind of unconscious symbolism? But he could’ve sworn he had never seen this flower before. 

[Deviousness is nothing to lament! Why, a certain amount of deception is needed in any career… I quite enjoyed seeing you dance circles around that mediocre pencil-pusher today.]

[Though I will say your supporting cast member took too much of the spotlight for my taste.] 

Braun seems to be growing more and more impatient with Agent Choi for some reason, which isn’t a good sign. It’s probably best to talk things out now. 

“Agent Choi is my friend too,” says Kim Soleum. “You don’t have to like him, but- can you accept him, at least?”

A long-suffering sigh echoes in Kim Soleum’s mind. 

[He isn’t my favourite of your supporting cast… but I suppose neither is he the worst. A good friend such as I can tolerate his place, if he truly makes you happy.]

…Why does he suddenly feel like he’s introducing his new girlfriend to a disapproving group chat? 

“He’s my friend,” Kim Soleum repeats. 

[Of course, Mr. Roe Deer! Did I claim otherwise?]

Maybe he’s just overthinking. He gives his head a rough shake, clearing it. 

The baby snapdragon still sways by his foot. 

Aside from the odd dreams, all in all nothing really changes after Agent Choi confesses his love. 

It’s quietly driving Kim Soleum a bit crazy. 

Agent Choi has always been the touchy sort. Ruffling his hair, patting his back, hand on his shoulder and leaning in as he talks. It isn’t as though he’s gotten any more touchy since confessing, but-

Kim Soleum is so much more conscious of it now. 

He’s had people confess to him before. He’s rejected people before too. But somehow, with Agent Choi, it’s so much harder to just forget and move on. Kim Soleum has never been so grateful for his poker face. 

His mind just keeps wandering to inappropriate topics when Agent Choi has his hands on him. 

At a desk, working on a report with Agent Choi’s hand warm on his shoulder, Agent Choi leaning in from behind to chatter away in his ear-

Suddenly, Kim Soleum can’t stop wondering whether Agent Choi enjoys this. Whether he uses it as fodder for fantasies, at night in bed all alone. 

It’s a ridiculous thought with an obvious answer: he must. Kim Soleum doubts much is different just because Agent Choi is presumably gay. Kim Soleum has shamefully done the same whenever he’s had crushes- he’s never been touchy like Agent Choi, but most of the people he’s fallen for have been the openly affectionate type. 

Kim Soleum is happy if Agent Choi gets some comfort out of this. It feels nice, even. For the sake of their friendship, there’s no need to think about it any further.

And yet, the thought of Agent Choi in bed thinking of him won’t leave his mind. 

His throat itches. He wants a glass of water. 

“Grapes-ie, you alright?” Agent Choi asks. “You aren’t typing.” 

“Apologies, sunbae,” Kim Soleum says quickly, and focuses his attention back on the crisp black text on the screen. 

At this rate, he really will go mad.

In his dreams, the baby snapdragons steadily expand in a neat circle around him, an unbloodied haven in the field of stained yellow tulips. 

It’s probably not a good sign. Kim Soleum wishes he still had his Memorial Popsocket to search the wiki about it. But Braun did agree that this likely wasn’t a Darkness, and despite his eerie surroundings, there’s no sign of danger just yet. 

For now, he’ll continue to monitor. 

On a crisp spring afternoon almost a month after Agent Choi’s confession, Ryu Jaekwan treats him to coffee after work. 

They just got out of a low-tier Darkness, one that had been decently safe even before the mass child-proofing- so long as you entered with someone else. Agent Choi is off on his own assignment somewhere across the city. He likely wouldn’t be done until tomorrow at the earliest. 

So it’s just the two of them who enter the café. It’s a typical chain store, decently bustling even at a time when most people are still at work. Ryu Jaekwan is quick to select a simple cold brew from the ordering screen- Kim Soleum wavers more over the options. 

In the end, he gives in and taps the strawberry cold foam latte he was eyeing from the very start. He briskly selects two shots of vanilla syrup and one shot of strawberry, then adds to cart. 

“Hm,” comments Ryu Jaekwan. “You have the same taste as Agent Choi.” 

…Yes, he knows!

“Is that so?” Kim Soleum just says politely. 

In truth, he only started ordering this drink because it had been mentioned at the start of one of his favourite exploration records. It was a little too sweet for him at first, but he eventually developed a taste for it. 

The exploration record in question was, of course, unfortunately one of Agent Choi’s. He’ll carry this secret to his grave. 

They’re lucky enough to spot a table for two by a window after grabbing their drinks- Kim Soleum quickly slips into a seat, Ryu Jaekwan following soon after.  

“You did well today, Agent,” says Ryu Jaekwan after a moment. 

“Thanks to your help.”

“No need to be humble,” Ryu Jaekwan says. He takes a small sip of his coffee, his gaze shifting outside. 

Kim Soleum looks as well. There’s not much of a view from this café, just concrete roads and sparsely spaced trees. This chain store isn’t really meant to be a place to stay and relax- it’s more catered to commuters grabbing a quick drink. 

Ryu Jaekwan lets out a small sigh, sounding almost conflicted- but finally, he turns back to Kim Soleum. 

“Grapes,” he says. “I wanted to talk to you about Agent Choi.” He clinks his plastic cup onto the table. “How much do you know about hanahaki?”

They’re in public, but even if anyone overhears them it’s unlikely they’ll think it’s anything more than a discussion on fiction. 

“I’ve read our manual on it,” says Kim Soleum. “It’s a supernatural phenomenon that occasionally infects people who visit plant-related Disasters. The main commonality among the infected is feelings they refuse to convey, and the only known resolutions are to lose the feelings or to successfully see through a confession.” 

There was a rather extensive list of applicable Darknesses in the manual: it seems to be a surprisingly rampant issue. 

“The infected feel as though flowers are growing in their lungs, and cough up materialized flowers and petals. However, x-rays show their lungs as empty, and any attempt at surgery fails.” He takes a small sip of his latte, then, matter-of-fact- “Long-term infection leads to lung and throat scarring, and risks death from suffocation. Dokkaebi flame can be used to suppress the symptoms.” 

Agent Choi likely only survived as long as he did thanks to his dokkaebi lantern. If he didn’t have one, or his flame had been too weak to support both his missing organs and his weakened lungs-

Kim Soleum’s hand clenches around his drink. His throat itches- he downs a generous gulp of his latte, but the itch unfortunately remains.  

“Great memory as always,” Ryu Jaekwan says, the compliment sounding genuine. “But yes. Agent Choi reported his infection to the Bureau and I early-on. He claimed he wished he could tell you how much he cared for you as his junior- but obviously, that was impossible with you gone.” There’s no blame in his voice, only a matter-of-fact tone. “Platonic cases of hanahaki are rare. However, given the extreme circumstances, no one had any reason to doubt it. Including myself.”

Ah. Kim Soleum is beginning to suspect where this is going. 

“But,” Ryu Jaekwan continues, looking conflicted, “Yellow tulips mean unrequited romantic love.”

Briefly, Kim Soleum flicks his eyes closed. “Are you asking what Agent Choi confessed to me that night?”

“No,” says Ryu Jaekwan, shaking his head. “If he wants me to know, he’ll tell me himself.” He’s quiet for a moment, then- “Grapes,” he continues. “Agent Choi never recovered even after years. He still coughed up petals, blood, on a weekly basis. Since you just quoted the manual to me, you must know what that means.” 

“…Yes.”

“Agent Choi is cured now, and I’m grateful you helped him with that,” Ryu Jaekwan says. “I’m grateful you came back too. But-” he smiles wryly. “Please don’t lead him on. That’s all I ask.” His gaze shifts down, his thumb fidgeting over his cup’s lid. “That way, I think he’ll be able to move on properly this time.”

Even once you leave again, Ryu Jaekwan doesn’t say. But it still sits in the air between them, unsaid. 

In all honesty, Kim Soleum assumed that Agent Bronze forgave him easier. He had been the one to invite him back to the team, after all. But he should’ve known better- he should’ve known broken trust couldn’t be rebuilt with a few pretty words.  

He’s made it through so many of his struggles through deception, desperate acting, and grandiose words. Somehow though, he feels like that careful shield of his has always fallen apart in the end when he faces the Bureau agents.

I won’t leave this time, Kim Soleum could say. But would that be any more effective on Agent Bronze than on Agent Choi? He doubts it. 

There’s nothing he can say to fix this, nothing he can declare to make Ryu Jaekwan believe in him again. The only thing that will help is time. 

But he won’t say nothing. 

“I don’t intend to,” says Kim Soleum. “I care for him too, Agent Bronze.”

And from how Ryu Jaekwan smiles and nods, that at least was believed. 

let’s grab dinner tonight at 8? naver.me/B6fa1dEb

badger’s been doing well

Kim Soleum receives the string of texts first thing in the morning from Eun Haje. The restaurant she’s linked him is a bar with private rooms not too far from Daydream headquarters. 

Sounds good.

He texts back, though they both know the appointment is tentative. When you deal with Darknesses for work, you never know when you might get thrown into one that lasts days. 

On his side at least, there’s no hiccups- he tumbles out of his last Darkness for the day late evening, with plenty of time to make it to the restaurant even after dropping by his apartment to change.

When he arrives at the restaurant with five minutes to spare, there’s three familiar silhouettes milling around nearby. 

Eun Haje. Park Minseong. Lee Jaheon. 

“Roe!” Eun Haje calls out, waving at him with a grin. 

And Kim Soleum smiles back, jogging over. 

They all still work at Daydream, though no longer on the same squad. Lee Jaheon is frontlining Squad D as always, while Eun Haje is flitting around under the newly-promoted Baek Saheon- she’s cagey about the exact nature of her work, but Kim Soleum suspects it's intelligence-related. 

And Park Minseong is still on the Security Team. 

With the ousting of Director Cheong and the destruction of all her contracts, none of the Security Team employees are strictly beholden to Daydream any longer- but in practical terms, it just means they can choose to move to the Bureau instead. Any heavily-contaminated human wandering around freely would likely be swiftly captured by them, after all. 

Only a handful of employees chose that route, mainly former agents and employees with lower levels of contamination who could get away with minimal Bureau monitoring. Most were too apathetic to leave, or pragmatic enough to recognize the Bureau’s own dangers. 

Kim Soleum has the connections to ensure Park Minseong’s safety at the Bureau if he chose to leave Daydream, but unsurprisingly, he chose to stay. He has more friends and coworkers there, and the work there gives him structure, especially with Baek Saheon’s reforms for productivity. 

A waiter seats them at a table in a private room, menus tucked under his arm. But when he makes to hand them out-

“I’ll handle it,” Eun Haje is quick to say, snatching them all from the waiter’s hand. Menus aren’t quite the same as manuals, but they’re close enough it’s best not to risk it.

In the end, it’s impossible for everything to return to normal in a world like this. 

(Despite that, Kim Soleum is still glad everyone is alive.)

They’ve caught up like this only once before, on another day Park Minseong was doing well enough to leave at night. Kim Soleum hopes there’ll be more to come. 

“I’ve been getting Dream Essence almost a third of the time now,” Park Minseong shares with a wide smile, and Kim Soleum congratulates him with a matching smile. 

It’s hard to keep a tight grasp on being human. Kim Soleum understands that keenly- as well as most of his allies. He suspects he was the inspiration behind Baek Saheon’s revamp of the Security Team, to insist on their humanity so they could have them use essence collectors once more. Not that Baek Saheon has ever admitted it. 

Conversation is generally light. They chat what they can about work - though in Lee Jaheon’s case, it’s more Kim Soleum asking specific questions and having them answered - and Park Minseong brings up a show he’s been watching lately. 

“You got anything going on outside of work, Roe?” Eun Haje teases, and- 

Agent Choi’s face flits in his mind. Kim Soleum hesitates for a moment, but- it isn’t as though he has to mention names. And he has been wanting to talk to someone about it. 

“Someone did confess to me,” admits Kim Soleum. 

Park Minseong’s eyes widen, Eun Haje grins widely- Lee Jaheon remains nonplussed. 

“That’s our Roe,” says Eun Haje. “With a face like yours, surprised it didn’t happen earlier. So? You have a girlfriend now?”

“I turned them down.” 

Thankfully, it’s easy enough to avoid any mention of gender, even if Eun Haje and Park Minseong will likely make their own assumptions. Though Lee Jaheon… now that he thinks about it, he’s not entirely sure if aliens even have sexuality. 

“Ack, poor girl.” Eun Haje laughs. “Well, you can’t force that kinda thing. Don’t feel bad about it.”

“Was it someone at the Bureau?” asks Park Minseong. 

“It was another agent,” Kim Soleum confirms.

“Don’t tell me it was Goral!”

“It wasn’t. I’d prefer not to say either way.”

“Got it, got it,” says Eun Haje, backing down easily enough. “Still, that’s exciting!”

“Might be awkward too if he works with the girl,” Park Minseong points out. 

“Fair-”

“-Was it Agent Choi?” Lee Jaheon asks, and Kim Soleum internally chokes on his beer. 

Outwardly, he takes a calm sip and raises an eyebrow. “Can you explain your reasoning?”

“You have the same contamination he previously had.” 

Kim Soleum’s hand draws to his chin. 

His recurring dreams of a flower field. Lee Jaheon’s words. 

He has hanahaki. 

Kim Soleum really should’ve guessed earlier, but he was thrown off by the lack of symptoms- but given that he’s not in love with anyone, it only makes sense. Could it be transmitted through the air like a normal disease? Kim Soleum did sit right by Agent Choi as he hacked up half his lungs. But if it could, the Bureau didn’t know about it: there was nothing suggesting that possibility in the manual Kim Soleum read from cover to cover. Nothing mentioning dreams either. 

Perhaps there’s a secret transmission method… or perhaps he just picked it up from somewhere else? 

“Uh, Roe?” Eun Haje cuts through his thoughts. “Care to explain?”

Kim Soleum takes a moment to consider, then gives them an abridged version of events. “Agent Choi was infected by a supernatural disease that forced him to confess to me for the cure. I now suspect he may have infected me as well, but the cure is equally straightforward.”

Technically true, while also saving Agent Choi’s privacy by implying he was forced to confess to a man. 

“Ah, that explains things,” says Eun Haje, deflating a little. “So it wasn’t even real.”

“Did you… want it to be?” Park Minseong asks hesitantly. “Roe?”

Huh? 

“Huh? Oh!” Eun Haje leans in over the table, nodding. “Because that’s totally fine too. Everyone has their differences, yeah?” 

Park Minseong nods fervently next to her. 

“…I said I turned him down.”

“Well, it’s you we’re talking about,” Park Minseong says. “I figured you would’ve noticed something was off. It would’ve been embarrassing to accept if it was fake, right?”

Kim Soleum absolutely did not notice a thing! He was far too distracted by Agent Choi to notice anything else! And at any rate, Agent Choi’s confession had been real anyway. 

“I don’t see him as anything more than a friend,” Kim Soleum says firmly. 

“So you wouldn’t mind if he say, found a wife?” Eun Haje asks. 

Kim Soleum’s brow furrows. “He wouldn’t do that.”

“Okay, fine, so the guy’s pretty dedicated to his job,” Eun Haje relents. “But what if some new dashing rookie joined the team and he fell heads over heels for her? Would be pretty easy to manage both work and romance then.”

That’s admittedly a bit more plausible. It’s basically what happened with him, after all. Some new faceless rookie, Agent Choi ruffling her hair in praise, slinging his arm over her shoulder, working together in the field and slowly falling for her- 

His throat itches. Kim Soleum coughs. 

“You alright, Roe?”

Something is caught in his throat. He draws a napkin to his mouth, coughing again, and again- with a final hack, something small and soft escapes his throat. 

He draws the napkin away from his mouth. 

A soft pink blossom from a baby snapdragon sits in his hand.

Kim Soleum crushes it with the napkin into a ball, tosses it onto the table- and buries his face into his hands. 

“Roe?” It’s Park Minseong this time. 

Does he have a crush on Agent Choi? Surely not, he wants to say. He’s only ever fallen for women, he wants to say. Agent Choi is a totally obnoxious and unbearable senior who would never let him live this down, he wants to say. 

But he just coughed up a flower. 

And he tastes ash in his mouth at the thought of Agent Choi falling for someone else. 

Which is ridiculous. Agent Choi wouldn’t stop caring for him just because he wasn’t in love with him. He values his juniors deeply either way- he would go just as far for Ryu Jaekwan as he has for Kim Soleum. That’s just the type of person he is. 

But if there’s someone else more important than them both, someone else who would share Agent Choi’s home and bed and comfort and love-

Kim Soleum coughs again. With a flash of a grimace, he straightens up and grabs another napkin, neatly hacking up the second blossom. At least it’s not bloody just yet. 

With a sigh, he downs a good half of a can of beer. Not that it does much for the mild irritation in his throat, since it’s from his windpipe. 

“Are you okay?” Park Minseong asks. 

“Sorry for the scare. I’m fine,” says Kim Soleum. And when he sees two pairs of doubtful eyes in front of him, he adds- “I know the cure.”

“Is this that contamination?” Eun Haje asks, sharp. 

Kim Soleum nods. 

“Well, alright,” Eun Haje concedes. “But let us know if you need help, okay? Don’t go running off into a dusty corner like a sick cat.”

“I won’t,” Kim Soleum promises. 

He does really know the cure, after all. And it’s extremely simple. 

…It’s just also extremely embarrassing. 

He finishes off his dinner with his former Squad D friends. It’s only partly a way to procrastinate the inevitable- Park Minseong is only sometimes stable enough to safely leave Daydream, and he doesn’t want to cut their rare time together short. Getting a visitor’s badge to the Security Division is a bit of a pain for him these days. 

But too soon, he finds himself standing back outside the restaurant with them, staring at Agent Choi’s contact on his phone. 

He’s said his goodbyes to everyone. Eun Haje and Park Minseong have already headed off. 

But Lee Jaheon lingers for a moment. 

“There’s another cure,” Lee Jaheon says abruptly. 

“What is it?”

“Surgery. We can do it.”

As Kim Soleum thought. If anyone had the technology to surgically remove a supernatural phenomenon that doesn’t show up on scans, it would be the aliens. “I’m alright,” he says. “But thank you.”

Lee Jaheon nods, taking no offense. “Good luck,” he offers. 

“Thank you,” Kim Soleum says again, and Lee Jaheon heads off. 

Kim Soleum stares at his phone for just a moment longer, then sighs and taps the call button. 

It only rings once before Agent Choi picks it up. “Y’ello? What’s up, Grapes-ie?” 

“Agent Choi,” says Kim Soleum. “Could I come over?”

“Hm? Well, alright.” 

Agent Choi doesn’t even ask any questions, despite it being unacceptably late to visit- that too makes his throat itch, so he tries not to dwell on it. Kim Soleum would really rather get this over with sooner than later. 

…And if he waits too long, he fears he’ll lose his nerve. 

“Thank you. I’ll be there in twenty minutes.”

Kim Soleum ends the call, and exhales. 

Is it too late to back out?

Part of him knows he’s being ridiculous. Over two months ago, Agent Choi confessed even knowing he’d be rejected, expecting Kim Soleum to leave right after. Tonight, all Kim Soleum needs to do is confess to a man who’s said he loves him countless times. 

But Kim Soleum hasn’t even come to terms with any of this. Spouting an I love you would be easy, but he truly doesn’t believe it would be true. Perhaps he really does have the smallest crush on Agent Choi, but is that love? He doesn’t think so. 

He doesn't want to lie to Agent Choi yet again. 

(Agent Choi already trusts him so little.)

Kim Soleum slips his phone into his pocket, and breathes out a sigh.  

Well, he has twenty whole minutes to put together a plan- he’s faced far worse time constraints in his life. 

He’ll figure it out. 

He hasn’t figured it out. 

Regardless, he knocks on the door to Agent Choi’s apartment. He has a simple problem with a simple solution, and it would be ridiculous to develop say, permanent lung scarring just because he can’t manage a confession. 

“Grapes-ie,” Agent Choi greets. “Come on in.”

“…”

Should he just do it here? That would be the easiest method- he could quickly retreat after. They would still see each other tomorrow morning, but at least then Kim Soleum would have several hours’ leeway to get his thoughts together…

But- how would Agent Choi feel, if he confessed then left?

His throat is beginning to itch again- he immediately forces himself to stop thinking about it. He’s starting to get a hang on managing these symptoms at least. 

“Grapes-ie.” Agent Choi’s hand is warm on his shoulder. He herds Kim Soleum inside- Kim Soleum lets him. He’s lost the right timing to confess outside anyway. 

Kim Soleum is sat down on Agent Choi’s lumpy couch. It’s exactly where he sat last month, when Agent Choi swung an arm around his shoulder and so casually confessed his love. 

“I’ll go make us some tea,” says Agent Choi, but Kim Soleum’s hand whips out, clenching Agent Choi’s tight. 

“Wait,” he says. He tugs Agent Choi down next to him- Agent Choi plops down easily enough, but he raises an eyebrow, questioning. 

“What do you need?” Agent Choi asks. 

He’s worrying him. He can tell. But his throat itches, and he stops thinking about it. 

Kim Soleum takes a breath. 

In a way, this is like conquering a Darkness- so can’t he treat it as such? His expression settles. 

He was overthinking this. All he needs to do is state the fact that’s causing the hanahaki- so long as Agent Choi responds to it, that should fulfill the conditions of the curse and free him from it. 

“I believe I have a crush on you.”

Agent Choi- doesn’t particularly react. He just pulls his hand out of Kim Soleum’s hold, shifting back with a sigh. 

“Alright. And you’re hoping to get over it by telling me?” Agent Choi asks. 

No, that’s not what he-

“It was pretty obvious. Normally you’d at least be a little uncomfortable with someone after they confessed to you,” Agent Choi says. He smiles wryly. “I can tell you’re a little tipsy. Is that how you figured it out?”

There’s still that same utter lack of expectation in Agent Choi’s eyes, despite Kim Soleum’s confession. 

His hanahaki may be gone, but the yellow tulips still sit drying in their waiting room. 

Suddenly, Kim Soleum fully feels the weight of five years. A pointless, fruitless unrequited love for five entire years. 

Agent Choi never stopped loving him. 

But at some point, he stopped expecting anything from him, didn’t he? 

A simple statement of facts wouldn’t get through to him. Of course it wouldn’t. Kim Soleum already knew that- he had just forgotten, in his flurry to confess without lying.  

Kim Soleum doesn’t know if he loves Agent Choi, not yet. So he won’t claim he does. 

But there’s other things he can say that aren’t lies. 

“Sunbae,” he says. “I want to grow old with you.”

Agent Choi’s brows furrow. 

“I don’t want to imagine living without you.” 

“What are you…”

“I want to spend the rest of my life with you.”

But even after all that, there’s still nothing but confusion in Agent Choi’s gaze.   

“Sunbae,” Kim Soleum says again. “I did stay for everyone. But…” He draws Agent Choi’s hands back into his own. “I’m not leaving because of you. That much is true.” 

The blue wavers in Agent Choi’s eyes. 

“Soleum,” Agent Choi says. His voice cracks. “What exactly are you trying to accomplish with all this?”

Cure his hanahaki is the most immediate answer, but also definitely not the one Kim Soleum should offer. What is he trying to accomplish? What does he want to be to Agent Choi?

He doesn’t know. Of course he doesn’t. Part of him still wants to deny this crush, no matter how the thought of Agent Choi falling for someone else makes him want to bury his head under the sheets and lose himself in children’s cartoons on repeat. 

But he does want to be by Agent Choi’s side. He doesn’t mind the thought of being someone like that to Agent Choi anymore, no matter that he’s a guy. He thought he would only ever be into women, but he can admit now it was a flawed assumption- it’s rare for him to fall for someone, and naturally Kim Soleum wouldn’t be interested until that happened. 

So how could he have been sure a man wouldn’t ever draw his attention? He couldn’t. He just blindly assumed his crushes would continue to- well, fit typical norms. 

It doesn’t matter. He does have a crush on Agent Choi, even if part of him is still too embarrassed to admit it. Agent Choi reciprocates. 

And in that case, isn’t there just one thing for them to do?

“Let’s go on a date, Agent Choi,” Kim Soleum says. 

Agent Choi stares at him, uncomprehending. 

“To the aquarium, or a restaurant, or the movies, or-” Kim Soleum cuts himself off. “Maybe not the movies,” he amends. Too many bad memories of the only date he’s ever had in his life. “To somewhere. Anywhere.”

And when Agent Choi just keeps staring at him, still uncharacteristically silent, he tries again, squeezing Agent Choi’s hands tight. 

“I can pay,” he offers. 

“That’s not the…” Agent Choi’s voice trails off. “Soleum-ah. You turned me down just two months ago.”

“And things can’t change?” demands Kim Soleum, growing frustrated now. He leans in, still gripping Agent Choi’s hands in a warm grip. “You noticed I had a crush on you, but you can’t notice I’m telling the truth?”

At this point, he doesn’t care about curing the hanahaki. That can wait. If Agent Choi survived five years, Kim Soleum can manage a fraction of that. 

He just wants Agent Choi to say yes. 

Pink is beginning to rise on Agent Choi’s cheeks. It’s a bit entrancing. “That’s-”

“I know I left three times. I know you know I still miss home,” says Kim Soleum. “So I won’t ask you to trust me. But a date with a guy you like isn’t asking for much, is it?” 

“Soleum-ah, you’re not thinking this through-”

“I am.” Kim Soleum’s voice is calm. “What makes you think I’m not?”

“You can find better options than an ahjussi like me-”

“I don’t mind, hyung.” 

“You- Soleum-ah-” Agent Choi closes his eyes, makes an unintelligible noise. 

But then he smiles. 

“Haha.” His laugh is a little wry. “I really can’t win against my upstart junior, huh? Fine, fine. Let’s go on a date.”

Kim Soleum brightens, straightening and squeezing Agent Choi’s hands tight. 

“But why not the movies?” 

“…Do I have to say?” 

In the end, Kim Soleum agrees to stay the night. It’s late, and Kim Soleum finds he doesn’t want to leave, no matter that he offers to. 

Agent Choi suggests he take the mattress while Agent Choi takes the couch. Kim Soleum politely refuses. Agent Choi politely refuses the refusal. The debate swiftly reaches a standstill, but neither of them are in any mood to move from the couch just yet either way. It can wait. 

Kim Soleum breathes in, relaxing. He presses his face into Agent Choi’s shoulder.  

…Agent Choi’s embrace is warm. 

It’s far from the first time Agent Choi has hugged him. But it’s the first time it’s lasted this long. 

“Soleum-ah,” says Agent Choi. “Not that I mind, but what triggered all this?”

“…”

He doesn’t want to lie, but neither does he want to admit to the hanahaki anymore. What if it makes Agent Choi distrust him again, makes him feel like Kim Soleum’s confessions were a cold necessity? How would-

His throat itches, sharp. He can’t quite hold back a cough. 

That’s a mistake. 

“Did you contract hanahaki?” Agent Choi’s voice is exasperated. 

“…Yes,” admits Kim Soleum. 

A small laugh, then Agent Choi pushing Kim Soleum back even as Kim Soleum frowns at the loss of contact. He fishes a plastic zipper bag from his pocket, presses it into Kim Soleum’s hand. 

“I guess I never properly responded to any of your confessions.” Agent Choi smiles, light and easy. “You already know I still love you, Kim Soleum.”

And suddenly, Kim Soleum feels something blocking his throat- he can’t breathe. He coughs, and coughs again- it’s miserable, painful, but he keeps at it, and-

A single baby snapdragon falls into the bag, solid and unbloodied. 

Kim Soleum breathes in deeply, relieved. 

“Only one? Well, you couldn’t have been infected for long.” Agent Choi retrieves the bag from his hands, peering down at it. “Oh, I see. I wish you’d notice my feelings.”

Huh? Kim Soleum furrows his brow- Agent Choi quickly clarifies. 

“Ah, that’s its meaning. ‘I wish you’d notice my feelings.’”

“I was under the impression it meant strength and deviousness?”

“Hm? Well, it’s been a while since I read up on flower language, but I’m pretty sure it’s not,” says Agent Choi. “Could be the Western meanings. They do like their one-word labels for flowers.”

…Given that Braun was the one to tell him those meanings, it’s a good bet that’s the case. 

“Anyway, Grapes-ie,” continues Agent Choi, and grins. “Even your flowers were telling you to get a clue, huh?”

The smug look on Agent Choi’s face is unfortunately more endearing than infuriating. Kim Soleum doesn’t think he can escape this man anytime soon. 

But he doesn’t mind. 

It was his choice to leave, and it’s now his choice to stay. 

And he thinks now he can see his future here a little more clearly. 

“Sunbae, I was going to head out.”

The voice comes from above him- Choi looks up from his laptop, and sees Kim Soleum peering down at him from behind the couch. His expression is politely neutral, but Choi can see the request behind it. 

He glances at the time- it’s almost six. Well, no sense in not clocking out when all he’s doing is editing his last report. Ryu Jaekwan already left an hour ago. 

“Alright,” he says with an easy smile, shutting the laptop. “Let’s go.”

Their apartments are only one subway station apart, so they’ve gotten into the habit of heading back together- at least on the days they aren’t out in a Disaster until late. The life of a Bureau field team agent is still unstable, even if it’s gotten far less risky than it was just a year back- 

Choi glances over at Kim Soleum, offers a silly comment Choi knows will make him smile even as he rolls his eyes. 

-thanks to the man he’s brushing shoulders with right now. 

It’s late autumn, the trees mostly empty of leaves. The sky is already dark above them as they walk side-by-side to the subway- that’s autumn for you. 

Kim Soleum is Agent Grapes, a salaried employee of the Supernatural Disaster Management Bureau under Black Tortoise Team 1. To Choi, Ryu Jaekwan, to anyone who actually knows Kim Soleum, that’s who he is. 

But at the highest levels of the Bureau, behind deep layers of censored documents, Kim Soleum is classified as a god with the potential to become an Annihilation-sanctioned Disaster. 

Choi has never heard anything so stupid. 

It would be funny how frightened the higher-ups are of Kim Soleum if it weren’t so ridiculous. Kim Soleum may technically be a [Name]-nim, but he was always originally human, and he’s chosen to stay as one. And even if he weren’t, even if contamination overtook him, Grapes would still be Grapes. It wouldn’t matter to him. 

Choi fell for who he is, not what he is. 

Still, it made submitting the workplace relationship waiver a little less nerve-racking than it might’ve been otherwise. Kim Soleum was still adorably nervous about it, despite knowing perfectly well what the Bureau had classified him as. But Choi supposes Kim Soleum hadn’t thought through the full implications. 

The only consequence from the waiver had been a politely-worded letter congratulating him on the good work, and all but ordering Choi to never do anything that might displease Kim Soleum. 

He burnt it in his kitchen sink and briefly considered tossing the ashes into their offices. 

Choi isn’t going to manage Kim Soleum. Kim Soleum has had enough of people using him- Choi won’t become one of them. And if the Bureau tries, they’ll swiftly regret it. 

Choi will make sure of it. 

“-so I wanted to see that movie,” Kim Soleum says next to him, and Choi turns his full attention back onto the conversation. 

“Oh? You want to do take two of our movie date?” Choi says, teasing. 

A small huff. Kim Soleum knocks into his side. “I can’t believe you made me go to a horror movie with you.”

Says the man who was watching the trailer on repeat for weeks. Kim Soleum may get scared very easily, but he’s peerlessly brave- and perhaps because of that, he’s always been obviously fond of small levels of controlled fright. 

“I thought it was really cute how you shoved your face into my shoulder at the climax…”

“Agent Choi, I think your memory may be going.” 

Choi just laughs again. 

“At any rate,” says Kim Soleum, flashing him an unamused look. “Shall we go see another movie sometime? Perhaps the next evening we’re off at a reasonable time.”

“Sounds good,” Choi says freely. 

“And,” Kim Soleum continues, shifting in something of a self-conscious gesture. “Would you want to come for dinner? I made some extra jjigae last night.”

“A homemade meal from my beloved junior?” Choi grins. “Haha, I guess I have to.”

It’s been almost half a year since they started dating, and a little more than that since Kim Soleum chose to stay. 

They’ve been inviting each other over to their apartments occasionally like this for a while now. Choi likes making sure his easily-stressed junior is eating properly, and the junior in question likes returning the favour. 

The privacy is, of course, another bonus. 

Choi presses a kiss on Kim Soleum’s lips as soon as the door shuts behind them- Kim Soleum wraps his arms around Choi and happily leans in. 

Even before they started dating, it was obvious how much Kim Soleum enjoyed physical contact. Choi, meanwhile, loves giving the ones he cares for plenty of affection, so really it all works out. 

Choi leans back, pecks another quick kiss on Kim Soleum’s nose, his cheek, the side of his mouth…

“Is something wrong?” Kim Soleum asks, raising an eyebrow. 

“I’m just glad you’re here.”

Guilt shifts over Kim Soleum’s face for a moment, but he seems happy enough to let Choi pepper him with kisses either way. 

In truth, he’s begun to believe against his better judgement that Kim Soleum really won’t leave this time. 

Kim Soleum has no real reason to lie anymore. It’s still possible that something will change, that he’ll discover some new information that drags him back to his original home- but that’s life, isn’t it? It’s also possible that both of them drop dead tomorrow. Why worry over possibilities?

Even before his illness, he knew there was little point in living for what-ifs. He knew it was important to grasp onto what he had while he still could.

He lost most of what he grasped onto either way.  

Choi spent five years with an infection he first couldn’t, then wouldn’t get rid of. He spent five years feeling himself cough at the thought of Kim Soleum, five years with a suffocating fruitless love filling his lungs. By the end of it, it felt almost like an old friend. 

He suspects the hanahaki felt the same way.

Choi is the longest known surviving case of a hanahaki victim. Near the end, he was even seeing flowers in his dreams every night- a beautiful flower field of yellow tulips as far as the eye could see, clear blue skies above and a pleasant smell in the air. 

So when Choi finally confessed, when Kim Soleum rejected him- did his hanahaki take offense? Did it decide to jump ship before it died completely?

Perhaps it wanted Kim Soleum to feel even a fraction of the pain Choi had over the years, no matter that Choi wouldn’t have ever wanted that for Kim Soleum.  

They have no way of knowing for sure. But still, he suspects.

Choi nuzzles into Kim Soleum’s neck, settles there. 

“So, jjigae. What kind?” he asks. 

“Kimchi.”

“Sounds good,” says Choi, cheery. He doesn't move an inch. 

“…I’m getting hungry, sunbae,” Kim Soleum finally says, obviously exasperated. Though his arms still stay warm around Choi. 

“Alright, alright.” Choi shifts back and grins. “Let’s go have dinner.”