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Christmas Eve dinner was not going according to Eric’s plan.
At first only small things started going wrong, like the store not having the spices he needed for the chicken, or his nervously-trembling hands messing up the lattice for his blueberry pie. Those things were obviously not the end of the world; Eric could shrug them off, fix the messy lattice and keep going like he’d always done.
Then some bigger, more important things went south.
His moomaw’s doctor hadn’t cleared her to fly, so she couldn’t make the flight from Georgia all the way to Providence. Eric was disappointed that she wouldn’t get to try the chicken recipe he had been working on for weeks, but, again, he shrugged it off. He lifted his chin and painted a smile on his face, determined to host a wonderful Christmas Eve dinner.
While he was putting the chicken in the oven, his uncle called to let him know he couldn’t go to his house, and neither could his wife and kids. Apparently both kids had caught the flu virus that had been flying around, they were fighting some really high fevers and their parents didn’t want to leave them on their own –much less on Christmas Eve-.
Eric could feel a weight pulling at his heart, the idea of half his family being absent from his dinner making him feel sick. Though he couldn’t pretend to be stoked by the new information, he enthusiastically wished his uncle a merry Christmas and his cousins a speedy recovery. He quickly walked back to the kitchen to check on the chicken; even if the guests were few, Eric Bittle would not allow himself to serve a bad meal.
With the food going along nicely and a few minutes to spare, he got his phone and checked his social media, tweeting about the situation and wishing everyone happy holidays. When he checked Instagram, he felt the weight on his chest grow heavier.
Jack had posted a picture with Camilla and their cat, looking happy cuddled together with matching Christmas sweaters. The caption was simple; Family.
Eric swallowed the knot that had suddenly formed on his throat, mentally scolding himself. He couldn’t still be hung up on Jack, their thing –it couldn’t even be called a relationship- had lasted just under a year, and three years had passed since that day. The day when their jobs had pulled them on opposite directions with a strength that overpowered their love for each other, taking Jack to California and leaving Eric in Providence, in the house they’d bought together only weeks before parting ways.
Shaking his head in an attempt to clear his mind, Eric pocketed his phone and started taking out his fancy China and silver cutlery, absentmindedly setting the table.
His phone rang again, and his eyes lit up as he saw the caller ID. His mama had probably just arrived at the airport, calling just to let him know. He wouldn’t mind some cheering up on the day that had quickly become quite somber.
When he picked up, however, his mood only worsened. Apparently the airline had overbooked his mama and Coach’s flight, and they had been left behind. With no other flights to Providence that night, it seemed like Eric would have to do without them. It wasn’t a big deal, right? He had his moomaw, uncle, aunt, and cousins to keep him company. Eric didn’t have the heart to tell her that none of them were showing up, knowing Suzanne would feel guilty no matter what he said. He kept his voice cheery until he hung up the phone, he sat down and set his elbows on the table.
That was when Eric took in the state of his house; a large Christmas tree with carefully wrapped gifts lying underneath it, the delicious smell of his new chicken recipe baking in the oven, an uncooked pie waiting for its turn in the oven, and a table set for four, as he always made sure to have a spot ready for Jack, in case he decided to come back home.
He knew Jack was happy with his job and his wife, but a more childish part of him didn’t want to believe that the only man he had ever been –and still was- in love with, had moved on and didn’t love him anymore.
He couldn’t just keep pretending he was alright, all the things that had gone wrong on what was supposed to be a happy day with family had built up on his already-stressed-out brain, up to the point where it was too much for him.
Eric let his head drop into his hands, finally allowing the tears to run down his face and the sobs to leave his mouth as they made his body tremble and shake. Each new tear felt like fire burning his cheeks, full of frustration –at himself, at his failed relationship, at fate- and just plain sadness.
So much for a merry Christmas.