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It had been a rough few days for a certain pair of Sentinels.
They sat back-to-back in Chance’s cabin, Two Time’s tail carefully curled around his waist. The Rounds had finally ended for the day, and the two had quickly squirreled themselves away from the prying eyes of the other Survivors.
“....Are you alright?” Chance asked, voice low and soft. There was a moment of quiet, peaceful and unexpectant on either end.
“....No.” Two Time finally responded.
“....Me either.” Chance admitted, after another long pause. He learned back slightly, just enough to rest the back of their head on Two Time’s own, gentle not to bump too hard into their skull.
“Do you want to talk about it?” Two Time asked, leaning back against Chance’s head. His fedora lay in his lap, the silken edges being gently stroked by glove-free fingers.
“Not really. What about you?” He asked in return, and a small hum of thought came from Two Time.
“....Me either. We probably should though, right? That’s what Noob told me, about sharing your bad feelings.” Two Time’s tail flicked against Chance’s waist, before settling again, the points curled delicately into the fabric of his suit.
“Yeah, probably. Doesn’t mean I want to, though.” Chance sighed, grinding his teeth in a self-soothing motion. A bad habit, they hadn’t done such a thing in a while, not since arriving to the Realm.
“What…. What was he, to you?” Two Time asked slowly, their hands clasped tightly together in their own lap.
Silence, for a moment.
“....I gave up everything for him. He was…. I don’t even know how to describe it.” A breathy, heartbroken laugh.
“....He was my world. I ruined it.” Two Time admitted. Chance pulled a hand away from their fedora, placing it on the ground. After a moment’s hesitation, Two Time peeled their hands apart, placing one on Chance’s own.
“He killed me, y’know? Got me to do so, so many stupid, reckless things. Ever heard of Russian Roulette, Timey?” Chance asked with a broken giggle. Two Time merely shook their head no, movements slow as to not jostle the weight pressed into their back.
“It’s when you take a gun, like mine, and only load a single bullet into it. It’s a game, the ultimate risk of life or death. He brought me to so, so many of them, and I just drank it up.” He sighed, soft, almost wistful.
“You were that lucky? As to survive?”
“I was. Guess I was too lucky. I remember him dragging me off to take the “scenic route” home, except the only route we took was to the woods. It was so cold, out there….” A phantom shiver traced over Chance’s body, and Two Time tightened their grip on his hand.
“I take it that’s where….”
“Where he killed me, yes. Straight through the heart. It was quick, at least.” Two Time swallowed silently.
“That’s….”
“Yeah. All I remember is him ranting about some sort of key, before he stabbed me with that sword of his. Bastard.” A scowl was practically foreign to the happy-go-lucky Gambler, but he scowled nonetheless. Two Time hummed softly, a deep sense of foreboding in their chest.
“You didn’t deserve that. Any of it.” Two Time murmured, trying to distract themself from the inevitable while still comforting Chance.
Their turn.
“....It was me, who ruined it. I thought it was what I was supposed to do, I thought I was saving them. He was telling me all of these awful, awful things, about bodies in the church’s basement, about how he was pretty sure we were eating them during the full moon rituals-” A shudder went down Two Time’s back, but as caught up as they were in their retelling, they didn’t notice the way Chance had stiffened.
“So I- I went to the Elder. He wanted to leave and I was scared, and then I was handed my dagger and then-” A shuddering gasp of air. “I went to him, in the field where they asked to meet me. And I- I….”
“You hurt him, didn’t you?” Chance’s voice was soft, barely a whisper. Two Time nodded frantically, leaning forward, away from Chance.
“I stabbed him in the heart. Like a monster.” They whispered, and tears finally began to fall. Their hand withdrew from Chance’s own to cover their face, to wipe away the unworthy tears.
There was nothing but silence, and the sound of Two Time’s muffled sobs, for a long moment. Chance sat there, back to the Avian, thinking intently.
The similarities were obvious, and cruel. A betrayer and the betrayed. But…. It wasn’t the same situation. Chance wasn’t blind, he could see the differences a mile away.
Itrapped was never in an abusive cult, for instance.
Chance couldn’t forgive them, though. That right wasn’t reserved for him. It was for someone else, across the lake, waiting in a garden of flowers. It wasn’t Chance’s place to forgive Two Time for their sins.
“Please- It’s okay, if you hate me now.” Two Time sobbed, shaking violently under the force of it. Silently, Chance turned around.
“It’s okay, I hate me too.” They gave a wet laugh, before startling as they were pulled back into Chance’s embrace. He held them tightly, a warm weight against their back, head hooking over their shoulder to rest on it.
“I don’t hate you, Times. You were scared, weren’t you? Would you have done it if they didn’t tell you to?” He had to ask, had to know. Hesitantly, Two Time shook their head.
“I- I don’t know, what I would have done. I trusted our Elder to lead us, above all else, how could I have done anything else? I was so scared…. But I hurt him. I hurt him so badly, and now look at him….” The sobs increased in intensity, but Chance merely held them through it.
“I’m no better than your own monster.” They whispered, arms wrapping around themself in a self-soothing manner. Chance increased the strength of his grip on Two Time, holding them tightly.
“No you’re not. You’re not like him, okay Times? I don’t hate you. I can’t judge you for a situation I can’t even begin to imagine. I’m so sorry, Times, for what they did to you.” Chance murmured softly into their ear, and their sobs strengthened once more.
“I’m a monster.”
“No, you’re not.”
“I killed him.”
“You did, yes.”
“I can’t fix it. It’s broken.”
“You won’t know if you don’t try. You regret it, don’t you?” Chance rocked the two of them back and forth, a gentle, soothing motion that seemed to reduce the sobbing hiccups and frantic nodding from the small Avian. Silently, Chance brought his moth wings forward, draping them around the figure that had been pulled into their lap.
“Was everything a lie?” Two Time whispered, shuddering. Chance pondered the question for a moment, frowning.
“I don’t know, bud. I don’t know a lot about Deities.” They admitted, a pang of pain racing through his stomach at not being able to help them more.
“....Do you think we were…. Actually eating people?” They asked, little talons poking holes in the sleeves of Chance’s suit as they gripped onto his arms.
“I don’t know. Maybe, maybe not. I couldn’t tell you. I’m sorry.” Chance admitted, and Two Time sniffled, trembling with the force of their grief.
“I’m sorry you have to hold me after…. After what you talked about. It wasn’t right, to do that to you. You’re so nice….” Two Time trailed off, leaning their head against Chance’s own, the soft fur of their rabbit ears tickling the side of their face.
“I’m sorry you went through that hell, too. I’m sorry they hurt you so, so badly.” Chance tightened his grip again, just for a moment, before relaxing.
“It wasn’t always bad.” Two Time whispered.
“But it was still bad.” Chance admitted. Two Time merely nodded, small and slow.
For a long moment, the two just held each other, sitting on the floor of Chance’s cabin. It was a little dusty, but it was peaceful. There was no one else to bother them, while they both grieved lives they could have had if things hadn’t gone so horribly wrong.
“I want to be better. I…. Don’t know how, though.” Two Time swallowed, gaze avoidant as they stared at the wall.
“Me too. Wanna try to figure it out together?” Chance offered, an olive branch swaying with fragility in the wind.
“Yes. I’d like that a lot. You are a true blessing, Chance, from…. Someone. Not the Spawn.”
“Thanks, Times. That means a lot, coming from you.”
“Can we stay like this, just a little longer?”
“Yeah, of course we can.”
Wrapped in each other, the two sat on that floor together, letting the time pass by. There would be more Rounds, more misery, more inevitable confrontations with the demons that haunted their pasts. It would be messy, and painful, and undoubtedly confusing.
But at least they would be together for it. It was better than being alone.