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"The fuel!" Grace cried out, the force of gravity pushing down on his body with a vengeance. "It's going towards Adrian!"
Rocky chirped in anxiety, too out of pitch for the computer to translate as he yelled out in fear, pressed against the side of his xenonite ball, unable to do anything to help in the oxygenated atmosphere with the weight of extreme gravity pushing down on him.
"We gotta get rid of the fuel tank!" Grace yelled out, reaching for a button and a lever, pulling the second down before hitting the former, stopping the pull immediately with a consequence Rocky would endure over and over.
The change in force slammed Grace against the wall in front of him as Rocky was thrown in his stabilized ball, forced to hear his friend's face smack against the computers with a sickening crack as his nose snapped and his head slammed into the metal, breaking open at the force of it as his vessels popped, rendering him unconscious as he bled a red Petrova line of his own along the screen, all while the ship continued to spin.
"Grace!" Rocky cried. "Grace! Wake up! Need eject fuel tank! Need stop spin! Grace!"
Grace couldn't hear him though as the ship kept spinning, holding both Rocky and Grace in place as the astrophage ran back to its home, back to planet Adrian. Slowly, oh so very slowly, the ship stopped spinning as Rocky fought to keep himself conscious against the force of it, eventually finding his footing while the ship drifted in the vast abyss of void and stars, silence and light he could not perceive.
"Grace?" Rocky hummed hesitantly as the ship's sounds quieted, no longer screaming louder than even Rocky's own thoughts. "Grace?"
Listening intently, Rocky found himself surrounded by complete and utter silence. Even the constant sounds of Grace's own body were gone. It was a silence that permeated every surface and all of Rocky's recent memories - a torture that would break any Eridian. A torture that had certainly broken him.
"No," he keened out, lowering himself to the bottom of his ball. "No. No, Grace no. Please," he whined. "Please come back."
In all of the chaos around them, Rocky couldn't even hear his friend's death, hear the loss of sounds that comforted him so deeply. The sounds that had told him that his isolation was over, that he wasn't alone in this vast universe.
Grace had gone and, like his crew, he had done nothing to stop it. He had been unable to stop it. He had sat and done nothing while Grace had slipped from his grasp.
"No," Rocky muttered, feeling himself grow sleepy. "No. Not Grace."
~~~
"Oh? Are you awake, Rock?"
"Grace!" Rocky shouted out, slamming himself against the xenonite wall in front of him as he heard his friend, his leaky space friend with all of his wonderful sounds that never stopped, never quieted - a symphony of life that Rocky never wanted to lose.
"Whoa! What's got you all excited this morning?" Grace asked, nearly tripping over his feet at Rocky's energy and need to slam himself against the xenonite wall, scaring the heck out of him. Rocky hadn't done that since they first met.
"Grace alive! Grace alive!" He chittered, pushing himself into his ball as fast as he could and running into Grace's legs with enough force to knock him over to the ground where Rocky could press against him as much as he wanted to.
"Um… yes," Grace agreed hesitantly, placing an arm over the ball and holding it close. "Last I checked, I've always been alive since I was born."
"No no no," Rocky muttered, keeping himself tight to Grace's side on the floor. "Grace no live. Grace die and Rocky come back to when Grace alive. Bad bad bad. No go near Adrian, no get predator. Need new plan."
"Buddy, I think you just got a little spooked," Grace tried to calm him, not entirely sure what to make of it. "Time travel doesn't exist and you can't dream as far as I know. I think maybe your fears got the best of you before you were fully awake and oriented."
"No," Rocky argued, knowing that he didn't dream this. It felt too real, even if he could dream. Fate had given him another chance to keep Grace safe and he would not squander it. "No. No know happen, but Grace no live at Fishing Trip. Rocky no accept, make new plan. Wait and make safer."
"We don't have any other options, Rock," Grace soothed, sitting up and hugging the ball gently, pressing himself tight against the xenonite in an attempt to calm his friend, all of his wet and squishy sounds echoing against the metal. "We'll be okay though. This plan is going to work, I promise."
"Work at cost of Grace, no worth cost," Rocky huffed. "Make new plan, safer plan," he trilled, rolling away to decide how to save his friend.
~~~
"Are you sure this is safer?" Grace asked, suiting up to do an EVA in gravity, a terrible decision by all accounts.
"Yes yes yes," Rocky chirped. "Safer for Grace go out sooner and have longer chain. Will keep astrophage away from Adrian predator," he declared, hoping that this would be enough.
"Okay then," Grace accepted, trusting Rocky completely. "Let's do it then."
Stepping out, Rocky wished Grace luck. He didn't last time and superstitions be damned, he hoped that this would make some sort of difference. He needed it to make a difference this time. He didn't know if he could watch Grace die again, exist in a world without him again.
Rocky watched intently as Grace clampered out of the ship, moving along the lines slowly as he inched towards where the predator collector was.
"So," Grace began, just about to secure the second clip in place. "How long is this-" but he didn't have a chance to finish.
The loose covering of the ship that had knocked Grace off his feet last time had let go sooner than expected. Rocky wasn't even looking for it yet and wasn't able to warn Grace before it went flying towards his friend, hitting him with less force than last time, but Grace wasn't properly secured yet.
Silently, the void swallowing any sound that might have been made, the single cable holding him in place snapped.
All Rocky could hear were Grace's screams over the comms as his friend sailed into the inky black abyss, far out of reach, until he was too far to be received. All Rocky could do was listen in horror as his friend was ripped from his grasp yet again and a heavy tiredness hit him again, forcing him to sleep and endure yet another nightmare - something he would never wish on anyone now that he knew them personally.
~~~
Each and every idea hit a wall as Rocky tried and tested them, waking back up in the same position with Grace completely unaware of his own death.
Getting too close to Adrian burned the ship up. Being too far away meant that the predator wasn't captured and retrying only got Grace killed anyway. Lengthening the chain made no difference, neither did trying to change the predator catcher. No matter how many times Rocky pushed back the schedule of the Fishing Plan, nothing changed. Even re-securing the fuel tanks did nothing to stop the astrophage from racing back to Adrian at the first chance they got.
Over and over, Rocky was forced to watch Grace die just as his crewmates did. One at a time, with nothing Rocky could do making any difference, only adding to his pain each and every time he forcefully fell asleep at the loss of his friend, unwatched and unable to help.
Rocky wished that his brain would stop keeping track of how many times he'd gotten Grace killed, watched his friend die in front of him or heard it and been unable to do anything. If he counted each death separately, Rocky had lost well over 100 crew mates now, each loss hurting more than the last.
He couldn't do this again. Rocky knew he wouldn't survive watching another death. Thinking about it over and over, Rocky realized that there was only one plan to make. Whatever kept putting him back in this hell-scape had given him only one option and he was fine with that. He'd be fine with anything as long as it meant Grace got to live, even if he didn't see Adrian again.
Grace meant too much to Rocky to allowing losing him, even at the cost to himself.
"Have good feeling about plan," Rocky chirped, pressing himself against Grace, taking in every sensation he could before his time was up.
"Oh yeah? Is that why you're so clingy today?" Grace joked, running a hand over the top of the ball, where Rocky's carapace sat. "Not that I mind it. It's great actually."
"Yes yes yes," Rocky repeated. "Have good feeling, want share with Grace. Have favor to ask of Grace."
"Sure buddy. Anything you want."
"If plan go wrong, if Rocky no live," Rocky spoke gently, "want Grace send predator to Erid. Want make sure mate and planet safe, even if Rocky no return."
"Whoa," Grace breathed out, kneeling down to Rocky's level. "What happened to the good feeling, bud?"
"Good feeling there. Need make sure Erid be safe if bad bad bad happen," Rocky lied, willingly walking into his fate with open arms.
"It's not going to happen, Rock. I promise," Grace said with such conviction that under any other circumstance, Rocky would have believed him wholeheartedly. "But, if it does, which I don't think it's going to, but whatever, I will do everything it takes to ensure that Erid gets the predator too. I wouldn't do that to you and your planet."
"Thank thank thank," Rocky chittered, tapping his claws in glee. He had no more reservations about his plan, trusting Grace to follow through on his word. Grace had already saved Rocky, Rocky was certain he'd save Erid too.
Everything was in place and Rocky had only one regret: not getting to see Adrian again and have pebbles, a family, with them, a dream they had so often talked about before the astrophage crisis and he had been sent off. The loss of that dream was more than worth ensuring they, his planet, and Grace got to live.
~~~
Everything proceeded as it had the first time, and many times after that, including the fuel escaping and the ship spinning out of control.
Rocky sat silently as Grace ejected the first fuel bay before he could move, sending his friend careening towards the metal, followed by the same snaps and pops that Rocky was far to desensitized to to care about.
With little hesitation, Rocky began banging his body against the wall of his ball, popping it open as oxygen rushed against his body with Adrian, his wonderful mate, as his only thoughts and regret.
He was cold. He was burning. He was yelling. He was quiet. He was feeling everything. He was feeling nothing.
He pulled down on the lever, pressing the button as Grace had failed to do so many times over and over. His weak, wonderful, and leaky space blob would be safe if nothing else and Rocky couldn't find it in himself to regret any of that, even at the cost of his own life.
Rocky dragged Grace to the medical assistant, Armando as Grace called it, before skittering back to his own atmosphere, content to sit as he slowly died while watching over Grace. He wouldn't, couldn't let go until he knew that Grace had lived this time. He would wait, thinking of Adrian and the life they could have had all the while.
When Grace finally awoke, promising to watch over Rocky, Rocky finally found it in himself to let go, hoping to finally experience the dreams that Grace had talked so much about.
Maybe then, he and Adrian could be happy. Maybe then, Adrian and Grace could meet. Maybe then, he could live a life that wasn't at the cost of others.