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"Thank you, Warrior of Darkness. The peoples of Norvrandt are ever in your debt," he says in his Formal Exarch voice. When I hesitate in the doorway, he adds, "Is there aught else I can assist you with?"
I have just delivered a report on a recent foray into the Rak'tika Greatwood, dry and businesslike—but the complicated tangle of emotions I have been trying to hold back throughout is anything but. It's just as well that he stands with his back to me, for even now my gaze lingers on him in a way I could not hide. His ceaseless work is taking its toll—I see it in the way he holds himself even in the dim light of the Ocular, the fatigue in his silhouetted frame.
Action preceding thought, I step forward and the Exarch turns at the sound of my armored boots against the floor, surprise registering on what I can see of his features. My eyes drop to his arm—the one formed of crystal, shot through with veins of gold.
The part of himself he shattered so he could fix the world.
"Does it hurt?"
He swallows hard, every ilm of his body radiating tension.
"…Yes." His voice is low and strained, as if the confession were physically dragged out of him.
I am reaching for him before I am fully conscious of the action—not for his arm or his hood, but for the crystal seam that splits his cheek.
He inhales sharply, and his hand shoots up to grasp my wrist with surprising strength. I flush at the contact, indirect as it is through layers of armor and padding. He turns his head away, but I can still see the angry twist of his mouth as he looks down.
"Don't."
"But I—"
"Aiko. Please." The words are clipped and sharper than I've ever heard him speak—the Formal Exarch voice is long gone. His fingers tighten around my wrist. His grip is not quite painful, but the pressure—even through the steel of my gauntlet—is jarring enough to snap me out of my daze, and suddenly I am painfully aware of the mere ilms between us and how alone we are in this private space.
Stricken, I take a step back, dislodging his grip as my hand lowers to my side.
"I—I apologize. It was not my intent to cause offense. Pray forgive the intrusion. I— should go," I choke out, all but running as I flee the Crystal Exarch's presence.
My stride carries me swiftly through the Crystarium, my face a stoic mask that no doubt discourages passersby from approaching. I don't stop until I reach my room in the Pendants, where I let out a long breath as I let the façade fall.
Back braced against the sturdy wooden door, I allow myself to sink to the floor and draw my knees up to my chest.
"You bloody fool. What were you thinking?" I mutter to myself.
"From where I stand, you appear to have not been thinking at all." The sardonic yet soft-spoken words prompt me to look up, with no surprise, into the knowing blue eyes of Ardbert.
I feel my cheeks grow warm and resist the urge to duck my head. "You— saw all of that?"
"Not all," he admits, folding his arms across his chest. "Enough to know that paying the Crystal Exarch a social visit in such a fashion was ill-advised. But I could have told you that."
I let out a sigh and tip my head back to rest against the door, holding his gaze in mute appeal.
The mirth in his eyes fades, replaced by a gentle empathy that makes my throat feel tight. Unexpectedly, the spectral figure comes forth to kneel before me. He searches my gaze, as if to ensure I am taking his words to heart. "I told you to be careful with him, Aiko. I have no inkling of where he came from, and he guards his identity far too carefully. And as I've said before, there existed no figure of such renown when I walked this world." He shakes his head, some distant memory of his clouding his features. "You simply can't know whom to trust."
I wonder if he is thinking of the Ascian Elidibus, who lured him and his friends to the Source with false promises of salvation for their dying world. Or maybe there is some other, more painful memory that has brought his grief to the forefront and scarred his soul so.
I want to stop up my ears, but a lifetime of survival compels me to heed the Hume's warnings. I only nod wearily and let my eyes drift closed, shutting out the world without.
There follows a pause, during which I can feel Ardbert watching me until he abruptly clears his throat, seeming to remember himself. "Right, then. I'll leave you to rest."
When I open my eyes, Ardbert is gone.
