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Performing was fine. It came easy. Following Singe’s guidance was basically effortless for him, what worry did he have when something like this came naturally?
It was the ‘keeping up’ part that got him.
Not to say that he couldn’t hold up to Singe’s standards, that part was fine, he was no Floyd after all. But John Dory specifically was always Clay’s reminder that he just wasn’t good enough yet. No matter how hard they all practised together, John just did whatever John wanted and got the highest praise for it.
Just today they’d wrapped up practice and Singe went ahead and patted JD’s shoulder and told him to keep up the good work.
Clay didn’t get anything like that.
Left the dance room in a huff, shoving past a skittish Floyd and started heading for the indoor pool. Of course they had one, what kind of rich maniacs would they be if they didn’t have an indoor and outdoor pool?
He didn’t care much about his clothes, threw them off in the changing rooms- paused briefly before meticulously folding them neatly- and then threw on some swimming trunks before he simply stood by the edge, and dropped himself into the water without so much as a jump.
He laid face down for a few seconds, partly contemplating to just linger there until he needed air, but ultimately pushed his lazy body for one last move and twisting himself around.
Limbs spread out like a starfish, he stared at the ceiling with what was probably an exhausted expression. So many rooms in this house, so many things to do, and somehow for most parts of the day no one really bumped into anyone else unless they were purposely seeking each other out.
Suited him fine.
Maybe he could convince Singe to get their hands on a techno troll pearl, make the water breathable here, just so he could sink down into the bottom and lay dead for a little while. Everything else would be quiet.
Well, quieter.
…
What a mind numbing house.
His ear snapped to attention at the sound of a door opening, and to his genuine surprise, it was Branch that stood on the other side. His hermit of a brother was a rare sight in the evening hours, though Clay was too lazy to actually lift his head and ask what he was doing here.
He wasn’t that surprised to note that Branch was watching him, for a little too long to have simply come here by accident (obviously, as he said, they never found each other by accident) and eventually began to make his way toward the edge of the pool.
He was in more casual clothes, ones he evidently didn’t mind getting wet as he sat down on the edge and dipped his legs inside - Clay couldn’t help but lift his head in bewilderment.
He didn’t say anything, and neither did Branch.
Alright. What did he want? He wasn’t here to hang out, they didn’t do that and Clay would’ve absolutely said no, so what gives? Branch wasn’t usually one to seek anyone out for any specific reason, so it was probably more important than anything anyone else had to say in this house.
He’d also take longer to leave if he didn’t sort this out, clearly. So, reluctantly, Clay turned himself around with a long sigh and paddled over to his brother, until his arms rested atop the edge. “What do you want?” He grumbled lowly, cheek resting against his palm.
Branch said nothing at first, and Clay wondered if he’d put the effort to drag himself over here for no real reason. Concerning response for Branch? Probably, but Clay couldn’t find himself to care enough.
He waited another few seconds, and just as he opened his mouth to ask again, with a little more irritation, Branch cut him off.
“You’re a jackass sometimes,” he said, quickly souring Clay’s mood. “But you’re annoyingly good at what you do.”
Well, obviously. Clay didn’t just keep a facade that strong for this long by simply being mediocre.
He angled his head, encouraging Branch to keep going, and Branch’s face twisted with discomfort.
“...Singe chewed me out.”
“Hm.”
Definitely saw that one coming a mile away. He’d be more shocked if Singe didn’t say anything to Branch after the attitude he displayed towards Poppy.
“He said- he basically said that befriending Poppy wasn’t an option.”
It certainly was not. Clay’s own friendship with Viva was required by Singe, and their public interactions shot Clay’s approval through the roof. Viva’s friendliness towards him meant more trolls liked him by default. Being in any important trolls’ good graces was important for the job.
“And that I’m not a baby anymore, so I can handle this ‘big boy business’.”
He snorted dryly, less from amusement and more just because that was exactly something that he could hear Singe say.
Branch looked even more irritated than before, bringing a knee to his chest. “And if I don’t go to Poppy and apologise to her, Singe is just gonna make us all work extra hours for the next show.”
That caught his attention quickly. If they worked any more hours they’d basically dance from sunrise to sundown, and Clay could not keep a facade that long.
Well, he could, he just didn’t want to.
“Are you kidding?” Clay snapped his head towards Branch, watching his brother hunch over. “Branch, this is exactly why you don’t test Singe’s temper!”
“It’s not my fault!” He insisted back. “Poppy’s just-!”
“That’s your first mistake.” Clay cut him off, Branch’s expression shifting to offence as Clay rolled his eyes. Great, they had a lot of work to do. He gripped onto the edge of the pool and pushed himself out of the water with a grunt, plopping down next to his brother.
“Why do you think I can handle Viva as well as I do?”
Branch said nothing for a few seconds, visibly trying to solve the puzzle as his eyes fluttered down to the ground, brows furrowing together as he pressed his lips tighter- Clay shook his head.
“Because there’s no ‘I’ involved, Branch.”
That obviously didn’t make sense with how Branch stared at him like he grew another head, and Clay let out a long sigh. Right, this is the part where he had to be a good older brother and mentor his moron of a sibling. Clay’s jaw rested against his palm, his other hand on his knee.
“You’re thinking too much about how you feel about everything, and what you want. Tell me, are you a regular troll, or are you an idol?”
Branch didn’t want to answer at first, but he let out a breath and muttered out an ‘idol’ under his breath. Good enough.
“Right, and since you’re an idol, you become an object.” He turned his head to stare out at the water. “They twist you into whatever shape they want, and you give it to them with no questions asked.”
“But-!”
“Enough, Branch!” He snapped back to his brother, watching him shove his jaw shut with a click. “You came here because Singe chewed your ass out, and now he’s got threats over all our heads if you don’t get your shit together, so I’m doing my part by helping, but it’s not gonna matter if you keep acting like what you want is important! There is no ‘but’, there is no ‘me’! Suck it up!”
They stared at each other, almost like they were trying to see who would back down first. Unfortunately for his little brother, Clay had played this game too damn long, and Branch didn’t exactly have many options, so it was inevitable to watch him pull his eyes away first.
“...What do I have to do? Specifically?”
“Fix your attitude,” Clay grumbled, staring back out at the water again. “Whatever Poppy wants, you give it to her- but don’t make it obvious you’re faking. They’ll just catch on and make everything more complicated.”
“Faking isn’t my strong suit.”
Yeah, he knew that. Clay breathed out through his nose and rubbed at his eyes.
“Then learn, Branch. It wasn’t mine either. Shit isn’t just magically perfect from the start unless you’re John fucking Dory.”
Branch slumped, huffing out a breath. “How long is it gonna take before I get good at it?”
“Depends on how bad you need it to be real.”
And for Clay? Well. It was apparently bad enough that even Viva couldn’t tell he was faking it, and they’d known each other for years.
“Can you help?”
“Hell no,” Clay jumped back into the water immediately upon hearing those magic words. “Are you kidding? I’m not spending my break working, figure it out or ask someone else.”
He didn’t wait to hear another word, just swam off into the centre of the pool to go back to pretending to be dead. He heard a distant grumble that was probably sarcastic, but soon enough Branch was up and out the door.
Good. Now he could be alone again.