Work Text:
r/IAmA
Hello, I’m David Hollander, Shane’s dad.
I’m not really sure what I’m supposed to do here. Apparently, people on the internet wanted to ask me things? David.
Join the conversation
6 more replies
Hollander0001Fan
How did Luca get his hand stuck in a jar?
▲ 2,210 ▼
PapaHollander81✓
Hello Hollander0001Fan, Evan Dykstra bet him he couldn’t get the last candy out of the jar, and I guess Dykstra won that bet. David.
▲ 4,509 ▼
SHollanderAMA✓
Dad!
▲ 4,169 ▼
PapaHollander81✓
What? You said to answer the questions. Dad.
▲ 4,401 ▼
SHollanderAMA✓
Not that one! I’m calling you. Don’t answer anything until I say you can. Also, you don’t need to sign off your posts. Everyone knows who you are.
▲ 4,012 ▼
IlyaRCentuarsCapt✓
Boo. Shane boooo. 🍅 🍅 Let the man answer all the questions!
▲ 4,498 ▼
SHollanderAMA✓
Oh, now he appears.
▲ 3,697 ▼
IlyaRCentuarsCapt✓
Luca is freed! To clear everything up: Harris (from Harris Drover Apple Farm) brought in a jar of candy to play ‘guess the number of candies’ for social media. Guys ate the candy, left one stuck at the bottom, Dykstra bet Haas he couldn’t get it out, which went as well as you can expect. Captain Ilya to the rescue! I won’t tell you how I saved the day. 😉 Anya was bit by a spider. ☹️ Vet prescribed her cream. She should be better in a couple of days.
▲ 4,737 ▼
HarrisCensSocialMedia
Again, the farm is not called that.
▲ 2,435 ▼
5 more replies
HalfWayThere_Liv
Okay, I’ll try something easy. Hi David, how are you today?
▲ 893 ▼
PapaHollander81✓
Hello HalfWayThere_Liv, I’m doing very well, thank you. How are you?
▲ 3,625 ▼
HalfWayThere_Liv
I’m doing so much better talking to you. It’s like talking to my dad again.
▲ 957 ▼
PapaHollander81✓
Well, I’m glad to hear it, and I’m sorry you lost your dad.
▲ 4,986 ▼
HalfWayThere_Liv
Oh, he’s alive. Just a drunk.
▲ 1,625 ▼
PapaHollander81✓
👍
▲ 4,777 ▼
3 more replies
MTRL_DOC
David, I just want to say I work in a children’s hospital and met Shane on a visit in 2017, and he was such a sweet young man. Well done on raising such a great kid.
▲ 1,840 ▼
PapaHollander81✓
👍
▲ 4,974 ▼
81ShockedRaider
Thumbs up emoji. Classic. He’s such a dad.
▲ 1,148 ▼
IlyaRCentuarsCapt✓
Don’t be offended by thumbs up. It usually means anything from “Understood” to “I love you very much.”
▲ 4,199 ▼
MTRL_DOC
Thanks, Ilya. Thankfully, I’m fluent in middle-aged man talk. 😂
▲ 3,230 ▼
IlyaRCentuarsCapt✓
Ah good. Thank you for saying nice things about my husband.
▲ 4,290 ▼
SHollanderAMA✓
👍
▲ 4,550 ▼
4 more replies
ForAFortnightThere
Is it true Gold Rush is your favourite Taylor Swift song?
▲ 1,385 ▼
PapaHollander81✓
Hello, ForAFortnightThere, yes, the girls in my office play a lot of her songs, and so I’ve really grown to admire her work. Gold Rush perfectly encapsulates the feeling of falling in love with someone who is so incredibly beautiful all you can do is daydream about being with them without realizing you might actually have a shot. The entire evermore album is truly a masterpiece.
Did you know she worked with Aaron Dessner from The National on the Folklore & Evermore albums? I do enjoy The National too, so I was very pleased to see his name appear on the credits in the CDs.
▲ 4,246 ▼
ForAFortnightThere
Aw, David yes I did know that but you being excited to tell me is the cutest thing that's ever happened to me.
▲ 985 ▼
PapaHollander81✓
👍
▲ 4,750 ▼
6 more replies
HollanovDefender12
Did you go to the Eras tour?
▲ 1,627 ▼
PapaHollander81✓
Hello HollanovDefender12, no, the boys took Hayden Pike’s kids when she came to Toronto, and no more tickets left for their old man. ☹️I watched the movie, though, and it was wonderful!
▲ 3,939 ▼
ForAFortnightThere
Why couldn’t Hayden Pike have taken Hayden Pike’s kids?
▲ 1,564 ▼
IlyaRCentuarsCapt✓
I said the same thing!
▲ 4,059 ▼
YunaHollanderAMA✓
When did you watch the movie, honey? I don’t remember that.
▲ 3,592 ▼
PapaHollander81✓
It was when you were at your sister’s for martini night, but I heard there are two versions so we can watch the other one together if you’d like.
▲ 4,426 ▼
YunaHollanderAMA✓
Oh yes, let’s do that Friday night. I’ll order pizza.
▲ 4,981 ▼
PapaHollander81✓
👍
▲ 4,472 ▼
PlzIlyaPlz
Hollander’s parents arranging date night on main is frying me.
▲ 2,325 ▼
HollanovDefender12
Mind you they’re in the same house. 😂
▲ 1,298 ▼
SHollanderAMA✓
Mom, where were you when he was struggling with this?
▲ 4,401 ▼
YunaHollanderAMA✓
On the phone with Ilya, helping Luca's situation. What did the vet say about the rash?
▲ 4,973 ▼
HalfWayThere_Liv
@YunaHollanderAMA spider bite. She has cream and should be better in a couple of days.
▲ 555 ▼
9 more replies
Stopme_dont
What are you making for dinner tonight, David?
▲ 3,681 ▼
PapaHollander81✓
Hello, Stopme_dont, I’m thinking shepherd's pie. What do you think, @yuna?
▲ 3,922 ▼
YunaHollanderAMA✓
Sounds lovely, honey.
▲ 3,685 ▼
SHollanderAMA✓
Guys, you are in the same house. You don’t have to communicate here.
▲ 2,856 ▼
PapaHollander81✓
You and Ilya communicate via the family group chat when you’re in the same house, all the time.
▲ 4,736 ▼
IlyaRCentuarsCapt✓
He has got a point, Hollander.
▲ 4,200 ▼
SHollanderAMA✓
👍
▲ 3,722 ▼
9 more replies
KiwiYum5
Hi Papa Hollander, I failed the CPA exam, and now I feel like such a failure.
▲ 820 ▼
PapaHollander81✓
Hi KiwiYum5, you are not a failure. An exam is just a test of how much you remember on one specific topic on one specific day. It does not define who you are. I know from experience those exams are hard, and they’ve only gotten harder since my day. You allow yourself time to grieve and feel sadness for a couple of days, then hit the books and get ready to get back on the horse and try again. I believe in you!
▲ 3,795 ▼
5 more replies
SteveOfTheOutback
The thread title just says he’s Shane’s dad. Who’s Shane? I’m confused.
▲ 3,929 ▼
Rozanov4lyf
Shane Hollander is a professional hockey player for the Ottawa Centaurs. He’s married to Ilya Rozanov, who’s the Ottawa Centaurs captain.
▲ 2,621 ▼
SteveOfTheOutback
Ah I’m Australian I don’t know anything about ice hockey. Sounds messy.
EDIT: I’ve just read the whole thread and now I’m even more confused.
▲ 1,087 ▼
Tis_What_Tis
You and me both I feel like I’ve been dropped into someone else's house.
▲ 2,894 ▼
PapaHollander81✓
Hello SteveOfTheOutback, sorry to cause confusion. Yes, my son is Shane Hollander, and my son-in-law is Ilya Rozanov. They’re both very good hockey players. If you type ‘Hollander-Rozanov on ice compilation' in YouTube, you can see how good they are.
▲ 3,579 ▼
SteveOfTheOutback
Okay for you Papa Hollander, I will do that, because you seem like a lovely man. I hope Shane’s rash gets better soon.
▲ 1,278 ▼
PapaHollander81✓
👍
▲ 4,083 ▼
SHollanderAMA✓
It’s not my rash. It’s my dog’s rash! Why would I go to a vet for a rash?
▲ 4,791 ▼
SteveOfTheOutback
I don’t know man. I was wondering the same thing. I’m only a minute into this compilation but I’m going to say I’m team Rozanov now.
▲ 1,639 ▼
SHollanderAMA✓
We’re literally married and on the same team.
▲ 4,412 ▼
IlyaRCentuarsCapt✓
Ignore him Mr. Outback. Rash has made him grouchy. Thank you very much for your support.
▲ 4,533 ▼
SteveOfTheOutback
👍
▲ 3,511 ▼
9 more replies
Keshaismymom
Hello David Hollander, I don’t know who Shane is, but you seem like you give good advice. The guy I like has left me on read for three days. What should I do? I thought it was going well, and now I’m heartbroken.
▲ 947 ▼
PapaHollander81✓
Hello Keshaismymom, I’m so sorry to hear you’ve got your heartbroken. Unrequited love is horrible but inevitable when you are young. It will suck for a while, but the right person will feel lucky to have you and will not make you feel this way. Don’t give him any more of your time. You deserve someone who can communicate with you openly and not treat you with silence.
▲ 3,762 ▼
8 more replies
PoulinFan_29
Papa Hollander, I’m struggling with my backhand can you help?
▲ 912 ▼
PapaHollander81✓
Hello PoulinFan_29, it’s hard to advise without seeing you play, but make sure you’re drawing the puck back a bit before you take the shot, as it gives you time to build power. Take a proper look at where you’re targeting and drive towards it with your bottom hand to get as accurate as possible. That’s where a lot of players fall down with their backhands not properly looking where they want to get the shot. If you can get the accuracy right with your backhand, you’ll be unstoppable.
▲ 4,082 ▼
3 more replies
PlzIlyaPlz
Hi Mr. Hollander, What's your secret to a long, successful, and happy marriage?
▲ 601 ▼
PapaHollander81✓
Hi PlzIlyaPlz, I wish I could tell you, but there’s no secret. The universe has given us some hard times, but loving each other has always been easy.
▲ 4,288 ▼
7 more replies
SamSpoons
Why can’t my dad be like you? Mine’s an asshole.
▲ 2,955 ▼
PapaHollander81✓
Hello SamSpoons, dads can be hard. Biological family really is just luck of the draw. You can try and get to know him a bit more and work on rebuilding that relationship, but if he’s truly done things to hurt you, you don’t have to feel any guilt about walking away. Believe me, you can go on and make your own family. I bet there are so many people out there just waiting to love you.
▲ 4,406 ▼
9 more replies
PapaHollander81✓
I have to go now, but I forgot to mention the Irina Foundation. Check them out. They do great stuff! Goodbye. David.
▲ 4,645 ▼
TroyILuvU
Well, that was chaos in the best possible way. 😂
▲ 2,235 ▼
Hollander0001Fan
I love him!!
▲ 2,025 ▼
Rozanov4lyf
Nooo Papa Hollander come back! Adopt me please!
▲ 1,897 ▼
HollanovDefender12
I love the fact the only things we learned about him is his favourite Taylor Swift album is evermore and he’s making shepherd’s pie for dinner tonight.
▲ 1,129 ▼
PlzIlyaPlz
And that man loves his wife!
▲ 2,559 ▼
81ShockedRaider
I’ll admit when I first saw *that* photo I thought some bad thoughts but now, I just want him to tuck me in and read me a bedtime a story.
▲ 1,624 ▼
PleaseScorezzz
@SHollanderAMA Shane ,what was the best bedtime story your dad used to read you?
▲ 2,049 ▼
SHollanderAMA✓
The Hockey Sweater
▲ 4,736 ▼
PleaseScorezzz
Of course. 😂
▲ 1,255 ▼
PoulinFan_29
Were you seriously expecting anything else?
▲ 973 ▼
5 more replies
frecklesNmoles
Physically I’m in a cold apartment in Calgary, mentally I’m under a blanket in Ottawa watching the Era’s tour movie with the Hollanders.
▲ 929 ▼
SHollanderAMA✓
Dad, people will ask you questions, and you just need to answer them.
▲ 4,681 ▼
PapaHollander81✓
Who are these people? Do you know them? Dad.
▲ 4,408 ▼
SHollanderAMA✓
No, Dad, they’re just fans. I thought Ilya was helping you?
▲ 4,366 ▼
PapaHollander81✓
He set up the account but had to go. Luca got his hand stuck in a jar. Don’t worry. Your mother’s here. How was the vet? Did they sort out that rash? Dad.
▲ 3,504 ▼
SHollanderAMA✓
@YunaHollanderAMA Mom, help him!
▲ 3,787 ▼
HollanovDefender12
This must be the most precious interaction on reddit.
▲ 865 ▼
frecklesNmoles
Someone protect this man at all costs!
▲ 1,860 ▼
TroyILuvU
No, Mama Hollander don’t help him. I want to know how long he can go accidentally spilling all the centaurs' tea.
▲ 2,133 ▼