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P.S: Damn you

Summary:

Dear Oik 
Trashkaw 
Fuck you
Oikawa,  

I have packed some items I found in my wardrobe, which I believe to be yours. They stink. Just like you. I had to rewash all my clothes and desinfect the whol I will need you to provide me with an address so I can mail them back to you. Or I'll  just burn them together with your stupid pictures, which I haven't yet because I don't have time for this bullsh 

fuck you, twice
i hope you choke 

Cordially, 

Iwaizumi. 
 

P.S: damn you

Notes:

I wrote this in a one sitter so forgive me that it's not proofread. I actually had a blast throwing all writing standards out of the window. Also this is loooooooosely based on Lana Del Rey's song 'Damn You'

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:


 

Dear Oik

Trashkaw

Fuck you

Oikawa, 

 

I have packed some items I found in my wardrobe, which I believe to be yours. They stink. Just like you. I had to rewash all my clothes and desinfect the whol I will need you to provide me with an address so I can mail them back to you. Or I'll  just burn them together with your stupid pictures, which I haven't yet because I don't have time for this bullsh

fuck you, twice

i hope you choke

Cordially, 

Iwaizumi. 

 

P.S: damn you

 


  

Dearest Iwa-chan, 

 

It's great to hear from you, even in such a peculiar way. I didn't know you were this old-fashioned, Iwa-chan! But you see, it's actually great that we get to learn new things about each other! Me, for example, I've been very busy with practice. Our coach is great, but training is brutal. This man does not joke around. And there's also a few interesting guys in our team. This guy, Higa, actually reminds me of Kyotani. His sense of direction sucks, anyway. The other day he was showing me around and we totally got lost. It took me an hour and a half to find the way back to my apartment. By the way, there's this new cafe next to our gym and they make the best matcha. We should go sometime Iwa-chan, I think you'd like the doughnuts. 

So yeah, overall. Not doing bad. How are you though?

XOXO,

Oikawa.

 

P.S: Did you run out of letter paper? I can give you some if you want.

P.P.S: i <3 u

 


 

WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE

HOW DARE YOU

i can't bel 

 

Oikawa, 

 

The details of your

I am not inter

oh for Christ' sake just go fuC

 

Your address. 

 

DIE ALRE 

Regards, 

Iwaizumi.

 

P.S: damn you and everything you stand for


 

My Beloved Iwa-chan,

 

It would be inconsiderate of my part to have you go through the hassle of sending me a parcel. Instead, I could gladly come to pick them up at your place this Saturday. Is 15:00 a good time for you? 

XOXO

Oik<3wa.

 

P.S: It'd be easier if you'd just unblocked my number so we don't have to exchange letters via Makki like five graders.


 

Shittyk

Oikawa, 

 

oh so what now suddenly you know the meaning of the word 'inconsiderate'

as if you'd ever, for once in your lif

you're not stepping one foot in my apartment ever again. i have quarantined your shit

There will be no need of taking such measures as you coming personally to my house. I'll just drop them on the post office after provided your fucking address. which i have asked you three times already you literal piece of sh 

This is my last warning. In absence of a concise reply I will assume you are no longer in need of them and will proceed to dispose them. 

May you step on dog shit as soon as you walk out th 

Have a nice day.

Iwaizumi.

 

P.S: Just give me your fucking address damn you


  

Dear Iwa-chan, 

 

But I insist, earnestly! You don't have to go through the trouble for me! I'll be there this Saturday 15:00, ok?

 XOXO,

Oikawa.

 

P.S: Miss you loads.

 


 

Oikawa, 

 

Since I received no reply regarding your mailing address, I have proceeded to burn your belongings. Here's a picture attached. 

Have a nice life, you fucker

Iwaizumi.

 

P.S: nah just kidding. damn you, you conceited bastard.

 


  

Iwaizumi HAJIME,

 

WHAT exactly is your problem!!!??? I mean I tried to play nice but you clearly don't give a shit about me so if I may ask what's going through that disproportionately BIG head of yours and why are you being the biggest asshole in human history I would appreciate— no... I would love an explanation.

SATURDAY 15:00, OK? I'm still going, you like it or not. 

Oikawa.

 

P.S: That was my favorite shirt. FUCK YOU. I still love you but fuck you man.


 

Iwa-chan,

 

You think that not answering my letters will make me give up? Hahaha, you're cute.

Saturday 15:00. I'll camp outside if it's necessary. You're bound to go home someday.

XO,

Oikawa.

 

P.S: Please don't make me camp outside, it's cold this January.


  

Iwa-chan,

 

You are a fucking asshole, A-class. Thanks for nothing. Tomorrow's the day. See you at 15:00, your place. 

XOXO,

Oikawa.

 

P.S: I legit borrowed a tent for the occasion, damn you. If you would kindly come to meet me instead of making me look like a hobo. Does this amuse you or what? Do you find joy in torturing me? That's sick, dude.


  

Oikawa,

 

I have already said everything when you decided to

Your level of arrogance will never cease to amaze me

You do realize that you're not the center of the universe, do y

Well ain't it funny that you can't take a fucking hint. Or is it perhaps that you don't care about what others

I'm not gonna let myself fall into this hole ag

I wish you had fought this hard the first ti

Why are you starting to care now when you cou

You know it's funny that you ask what

And all you had to do was fucking st

I don't want to see you, ever again

You want some truth? Well maybe I am

I don't know if I can

Don't do this to me I've mov

I have nothing to say to you. Don't waste your time.

Sincerely,

Iwaizumi.

 

P.S: fucking leave me alone already, damn you.


My Dearest Iwa-chan,

 

I am so sorry about yesterday. 

I thought about the things you said, and I wish I'd known back then. I wish you had told me. I wish I'd realized sooner.

I'm so sorry I didn't.

I guess I'm at fault, huh? I should have tried harder, I admit that. But Iwa-chan, you make it so difficult sometimes. Did you know that? You never make it easy. And I never know what you want because you never. fucking. tell me.

Tell me, Iwa-chan. Please, from now on, talk to me. 

I know everything about you, but I don't know you at all. I don't know what you're thinking, or what your insecurities are, or whether you think I'm being fun or obnoxious. I don't know if you want me to go or stay. I don't know if you still love me, because you won't fucking ever tell me.

I love you so much, Iwa-chan. So much.

Oikawa.

 

P.S: I'm sorry for kissing you all of a sudden. Is your head alright?

P.P.S: Sorry I lied I'm not sorry at all that I kissed you.


  

Oikawa,

 

Why can't you just leave me alo

You think it's ever been easy for me t

I don't think I'll ever be abl

When I'm with you, I just can't s

You are always five steps before me, and people 

Why do you keep tying yourself down like this to someon

 

Do you know how fucking hard it is, getting over you?

Iwaizumi.

 

P.S: why do you have to make me go through this all over again, damn you.


 

Dear Iwa-chan,

 

Then, don't.

Don't get over me. Can we start again?

Oikawa.

 

P.S: I love you.


 Oikawa,

 

No, damn you.

I'm terrified to. And it's overwhelming. You are overwhelming

Why would you think it'd be a good idea to go back to this hell

Isn't this kind of suffering once enough for a lifetime? I don't want to exp

How can you say stuff like that so easily

Are you seriously expecting m

What the fuck dude

I  

Yes

Sure

Let me thin

Give me some time to consider

But are you gonna give up on me ag

I swear to God sometimes yo

Whatever.

 

Iwaizumi.

 

P.S: I think Makki is reading these. Makki if you are reading this, fuck you.

 

 

 

Notes:

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