Work Text:
Chowder
Chowder has owed many a fine to the Haus’ Sin Bin. There are so many rules, and Dex is pretty consistent with calling people out for their fines. He's often seen walking around with the Sin Bin in hand, especially as the Haus dryer is desperately in need of replacing and he seems to be in charge of that sort of thing.
“Foooiiiiine!” Nursey and Dex always chorus in unison whenever Chowder picks up his phone with the soppy smile on his face that tells them Farmer is on the other end. Chowder just throws them the same knowing look he always does and they pretend to avoid it.
Bitty and Jack are clearly the worst for fines with Chowder following quite far behind, and then Ransom and Holster, somehow, even though they aren’t dating, or at least Chowder thinks. Nobody’s quite sure and nobody asks.
Nursey and Dex, though, should be fined. Chowder assumes that he probably can’t fine a couple who are still figuring their shit out, but they’re still painfully obvious about it. He thinks that the rest of the team probably agree, and whenever the pair of them do anything that remotely resembles something fine-worthy all of Samwell Men's Hockey exchange a knowing look.
Today Chowder sits sideways on the unsanitary green couch, taking up half of it with his laptop resting on his knees. He’s writing an essay, not quite as quickly as Dex’s usual manic typing but quite fast for his standards.
Dex sits low on the other half of the couch, legs crossed out in front of him, textbook resting on his chest. He seems to have dropped off as his textbook is facing downwards and his eyes are closed. Dex sleeps a lot more these days. It's nice to see.
“Dex!” Nursey calls and Chowder looks up to see him standing in the door frame, bag in his hand. Once he realises that Dex is asleep, his features soften into the sort of loved up look that Chowder recognises from whenever Jack looks at Bitty. Chowder knows that look is worth some money in the Sin Bin.
“Fine,” Chowder says under his breath. Nursey doesn’t hear, but he walks over and takes Dex’s textbook from his hands and puts it on the coffee table out of the way.
Chowder watches as right next to him, Dex, with his eyes still closed, reaches out and makes grabby hands at Nursey. Nursey chuckles and sits on Dex’s lap, grinning as Dex wraps his arms around Nursey's waist to pull him closer into his chest.
“You… you do realise I’m here, right?” Chowder says, deadpan. Both of them ignore him in favour of breathing the same happy sighs and snuggling even closer to one another.
“I can’t believe this,” Chowder mutters to himself, returning his eyes back to his laptop screen. “Surely this is a fine.”
Ransom
“I am this close to having a breakdown,” Dex remarks coolly, holding his fingers millimetres apart and directing his stare from his laptop to the ceiling.
Ransom laughs, empathising. “Been there, bro,” he says without looking up from his notes.
Dex's phone rings and he picks it up quickly, taking a deep breath before answering. Ransom still doesn't move his gaze but his ears prick up to listen. He's nosy, whatever.
“Hey, Nurse,” he says quietly. Ransom looks up immediately, the sudden softness of Dex’s voice surprising him in comparison to the loud but monotonous doesn’t-give-a-shit tone he usually uses.
“Uh, I’m okay,” he carries on, “I’m about to have a breakdown over this assignment but otherwise, I’m cool.”
Ransom leans back in his chair and brings his pen to his mouth, putting it between his teeth and raising his eyebrow in what he hopes looks like a knowing stance, because he does know. They all do. Both Nursey and Dex are oblivious, but one of these days they're going to have to acknowledge the way Dex's eyes soften whenever he looks at his defence partner, or how Nursey's chirping seems a lot more like flirting, recently. Dex either ignores Ransom's raised eyebrow or doesn’t notice.
Dex’s laugh makes Ransom jump so that his pen flies out of his hand and into his lap. Dex still doesn’t pay attention.
“You don’t have to bring me hot chocolate, Nursey,” Dex carries on with this look, one that looks foreign on his face. Ransom smirks.
“You’re in a class?” Dex snorts. “Nurse! Pay attention! Go and learn something!”
Ransom hears Nursey’s voice get louder on the end of the line and he’s laughing. Dex laughs too.
“You’re an idiot,” Dex says, and Ransom places his tone of voice well within the realm of 'flirtatious'. “You hang up.”
Ransom’s jaw drops and he splutters. “Are you seriously having a you hang up first conversation right now?” he laughs.
Dex blushes bright red. “Ransom is chirping me,” he says into his phone.
There’s a brief silence in the room only broken by the tinny sound of Nursey saying something to Dex. Ransom is still shaking with silent laughter and Dex is still blushing.
“Goodbye, Derek,” Dex laughs and then he hangs up, dropping his phone into his lap and then sinking into the couch, perhaps hoping it would make him disappear.
“That entire conversation was an absolute fine-fest,” Ransom remarks, picking his pen back up and poising it above his notebook.
Dex lifts his laptop up so it covers his face and doesn’t reply, but Ransom can still see the red of his ears. The boys are ridiculous, Ransom concludes.
Bitty
“Can we fine people that aren’t dating?” Chowder asks Bitty.
Bitty grins as he hands Chowder a paper bag containing the cookies he just pulled from the cooling rack. He had just recently sent a text on the SMH group that read free cookies, fellas! come and get them! :).
“Leave Nursey and Dex to it,” Bitty says. “Those clueless boys are figuring things out.”
Chowder hmms and shifts his bag on his back. “Have a good day, Bits,” he says and then leaves, deep in thought.
Bitty shakes his head, laughing to himself, and returns to packaging the cookies into individual paper bags ready for the SMH boys to grab when they eventually drop into the kitchen.
“Yo, Bits,” he hears Nursey say and turns around to see him flouncing in.
“Good morning, Nursey,” Bitty greets cheerily and holds out his paper bag. “Are you straight off? Chowder ran away in a hurry. That boy's always running around someplace.”
Nursey grins, his mouth full of cookies already, and hops up to sit on the counter-top. “Chowder always has somewhere to be. Usually it’s wherever Farmer is.”
“Ooh, those two are cute,” Bitty gushes. He finishes packaging his bakewares and turns to face Nursey with his hip rested on the counter and his arms crossed. Nursey doesn’t answer in favour of smiling at his phone.
“Am I gonna have to fine you for starin’ at your screen like that?” Bitty asks, smirking. Nursey looks up with a “huh?” like he doesn’t know what Bitty means, but blushes anyway.
“Yeah, Nurse, please contribute to the new dryer,” Dex says as he walks into the kitchen. Nursey rolls his eyes.
“I told you I would buy you a dryer, William,” Nursey laughs.
Bitty drops his tea towel in surprise, immediately recognising the parallel from Jack's replacement of Betsy in his awkward but adorable way of flirting. Bitty knows that Nursey and Dex are oblivious, that's common knowledge now, but this is getting silly.
“And I said I want you to stop buying me things, but that doesn't seem to be happening, at any rate,” Dex says, monotonous. “Bits, is one of those cookie bags for me? Only I should be in a class right now.”
“Of course, honey!” Bitty says, and selects the bag with the most in it. It’s a habit, even if Dex gets a lot more sleep nowadays, Bitty still gives him more than anyone else.
“Thanks, Bits,” Dex says gratefully. “See you later.”
Bitty waves him goodbye with a little waggle of his fingers. Nursey crosses his arms and pouts like a child.
“Do I get a farewell?” he whines.
Bitty watches as Dex's face becomes a smirk, almost like he's up to something. Bitty's seen that look way too many times to trust it, especially in a house full of immature boys that are always hatching some sort of plan.
"I'll see you later," Dex says, then plants a quick kiss on Nursey's lips. With that, and a smirk on his face, Dex leaves.
Nursey, whose face is a picture of shock, makes eye contact with Bitty, his mouth agape. Bitty shakes his head and crosses his arms, shaking as he tries to suppress his laughter. He doesn't want to intervene, but this would make a wonderful tweet, he thinks. Or maybe a movie.
“Dex, wait - Dex, what the fuck -” Nursey shouts, and then takes off in a sprint after his defence partner.
Samwell Men’s Hockey
“Will you two stop?” Whiskey yells and throws his shoe at Nursey and Dex who are lying on the couch, lazily making out.
Nursey sits up from where he’s straddling Dex’s waist and sighs, grinning down at his boyfriend. “How long for? I’ll set a timer," he says with a smirk.
Whiskey rolls his eyes and throws himself back into the armchair. “I can’t believe this.”
“Is anyone fining them yet?” Holster shouts from where he leans over the banister at the top of the staircase. Ransom and Lardo shake their heads in an attempt to master the art of fake sadness, but Ransom's giggling deems it ineffective.
“We still need the dryer,” Dex mutters, to Nursey more than anyone else, playing absent-mindedly with the drawstrings on Nursey's Samwell shorts.
Nursey rolls his eyes and shoves Dex’s chest. “William, how many times do I have to tell you? I will buy you that dryer!”
“Cute,” Lardo smirks without lifting her eyes from her book.
Tango scoffs. “Gross," he says, sitting up from where he's lying on the lounge floor.
“And I said to stop buying me things,” Dex says.
“Do you two argue about this often?” Bitty laughs from the door frame that he's leaning against, phone in hand and eyes dancing with amusement. "I swear I hear about this more than twice a day."
“He doesn’t complain when I bring him back hot chocolate from Annie’s,” Nursey defends in a sing-song voice.
“Gross,” Tango and Whiskey say at the same time, and then they make eye contact across the room, smirking. Tango drops back down to the floor.
“I always thank you for that,” Dex grumbles.
“Hmm, in one way or another,” Nursey says, wiggling his eyebrows suggestively, and then leans down to kiss Dex again. Dex lets go of Nursey's drawstrings and places both hands on his boyfriend's cheeks to pull him closer.
Groans chorus from what seems to be every corner of the Haus. Tango and Whiskey's are the loudest.
Eventually, Dex gets his dryer, and it's a nice one. Nursey refuses to answer when Dex asks him how much of it was his money in the Sin Bin.