Work Text:
“I have a question,” Lucy says once the door is closed and Tim’s mom is on the other side. “I mean you don’t have to answer but—”
“Yes?”
Lucy blows out a breath, after spending a few days with Joy Bradford, she knew she was the parent that Tim got his determination from. His stubbornness. She really did the best she could with what she had and it wasn’t perfect.
But Tim turned out the way he was partly because of her. He was a little guarded around the edges but he was good.
“Did your mom—did your mom know about the Tim tests?” Lucy asks. Tim freezes and looks over at her.
“What?”
“I mean she knew what a monster your father was. She didn’t step in when she needed to. She admitted that. But did she know about the Tim tests? All the other psychological stuff your dad put you through.”
“Yes,” Tim says. “She knew.”
“She didn’t stop them? You were just a child. I mean I get it. I like your mom but you were a kid.” Lucy says. “She didn’t see these tests were hurting you?”
Tim sighs and looks down at his hands, “She apologized for not being there for me and not getting in the middle of it.” Tim says. “She said she could have done more.”
Lucy agrees but then again she has never even in the position Joy was in. She was being abused too and watching her son get abused. And knowing Tim he would step in front of Joy and Genny every single time.
She has had pictures in her head of child Tim stepping in front of his mom and sister and his dad striking him for the last few days and it’s been keeping her up.
She has had pictures of his dad making Tim do all these Tim tests (Tom Bradford’s version) and him not being able to refuse to do it.
It hurts knowing what Tim went through for years and years. It hurts knowing he turned to the army and then he went through trauma with that. He was broken when Isabel came along but maybe he thought she could fix him but she broke him even more. By the time Lucy got to him he was a shell of his former self. She broke down his walls one by one and little by little. He trained her how he saw fit of course and Tim tests were a part of that.
But she never thought it made him like his father.
“She was in a hard position.” Lucy says. Tim nods his head and inches closer to her. “I just wish it had been better for you.”
“It is what it is.” Tim says. “I told my mom the other night that I was trying to not be my father.”
“Tim, you are not your father and you never have been.” Lucy says. She remembers when he told her that the Tim tests didn’t make him like his father. She never even thought that. It didn’t cross her mind for a second.
“I put you through so much when you were a rookie.” Tim says. “I put you through so much when I just walked away. And my mom, god Lucy all she wants is to be part of my life and I just shut her out.” Lucy steps closer and then pulls him into her arms.
“I know,” Lucy says and she pulls back to look up at him. “But you are a better man because of your father. You are not like him. You are so much better and your mom knows that. I know that.” Tim’s eyes are a little wet, like they were the other night.
“My mom knew that I was wondering around with a compass and trying to find my way home.” Tim says. “I don’t think she could do anything even if she wanted to.”
“Probably not.” Lucy says softly. “You are amazing Tim and so resilient. I am so proud of you.”
“Thank you,” Tim says and she smiles at him. “I’m sorry about not telling my mom about you. I really am. I just—”
“It’s okay.” Lucy says softly. “You are a protector whether or not people need it. Your mom just wants to know you.”
Tim nods and Lucy stands on her toes to give him a kiss. “Your relationship with your mom won’t just fix itself. You have to try with her. It will get better.”
“I know.” Tim says. “She thinks you are great.” He says. Lucy smiles and wonders how much they have talked since the other night.
“Oh yeah? About that..” She trails off and really she is just teasing him but he didn’t tell his mom he was living with his girlfriend. He didn’t just have women pop up at his house in the morning.
“She knows you aren’t just a girlfriend or someone I work with.” Tim says.
“I’m your live in girlfriend.” Lucy points out.
“Yes and I love you.” Tim replies and he doesn’t lose the soft smile.
“I love you too.” Lucy says. Tim leans in to kiss her but she moves back, Tim pouts a little at her.
“Sorry.” She says. “You have to work for it.”
“Lucy—”
“You did Tim tests so now this is a Lucy—”
“A Lucy lesson.” Tim finishes for her. “What did I do to deserve this?”
Lucy raises her eyebrows and he closes his eyes briefly. “Really?” She asks.
“Right.” He says. “Well I’m going to get started on the laundry.” Lucy grabs him as he walks by.
“I love you.” She says and it’s true. She loves him with all her heart, Tim tests and all. Every single day, she loves him more and more.
“I love you too.”