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English
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Part 2 of one train ride away
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Published:
2017-02-08
Completed:
2020-03-16
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29,971
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6/6
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on mornings spent swaying to and fro on the train

Summary:

Karma, Manami, the chronicles of meeting in the middle, and almost-but-not-quite dating.

Notes:

(See the end of the work for notes.)

Chapter 1: One

Chapter Text


It's when the clock ticks off another important minute that Karma decides he's done waiting, pushing off of the bench and striding inside the campus with purpose.

It wasn't that Karma was impatient. He was plenty patient; patience was an important virtue after all, and all her classes end at 3:30 pm. The catch was, no one would leave campus grounds until it was 5:30 pm (sometimes, Karma thought with dismay, even later than that). Oku Tokyo dedicated two hours of their time to prepare for the sectional research presentation on November—according to what the school manual said anyway, which Karma may or may not have borrowed from Manami, and as was the rest of the student body, Manami adhered to this practice. Enthusiastically so.

Sometimes he waits for her as early as 5 pm because his classes end an hour after hers. Sometimes Karma invited himself inside the school grounds when she went past their agreed meeting time.

"Hello, Kunugigaoka-san!" Sometimes, the braver ones who pass him by would greet him. This one looked familiar, ah, maybe she'd been the one on Tuesday? "Manami-chan's on lab 4A, at the Yukawa building. She's with Riko and Kouichi-kun. Need me to take you there?"

"Nah, I'm good, but thanks. You are…" Karma squinted, trying to name the face. Manami had four main friends here, and Karma was currently only familiar with Yotsuki and Ayasegawa-san, aka Riko-chan according to Manami. "'Daimonji-san'?"

She hums in a pleased sort of way. "Very good, Kunugigaoka-san. I'm off then, see you!" He's already walking towards the building on the right, and Karma gives her a two-fingered salute as he walks away, freely making his way into the building, smiling shamelessly along the way.

Unlike Kunugigaoka, with its rules and regulations made of iron, unless you are neither student nor faculty of the school, the gates remain closed on you for security purposes and besides, there were security cameras on each and every nook and cranny; not that 3-E was included on that benefit. Oku Tokyo allowed in visitors starting at 11 am on weekdays and 8 am on weekends because they had an actual science museum.

Visitors weren't exactly allowed into the academic buildings during visiting hours, but they didn't have cameras inside the buildings—something Karma's exploited for a number of times now.

Besides, no one is bothering to rat him out. They all like you too much, Ayasegawa-san had said to him; he exploits that too. So he smiles at each wide-eyed female and nods at passing males and skillfully works his way around an incoming teacher or two until he's sliding the lab 4A door open, startling two out of three of its occupants. Immediately, Karma's eyes zero in on the petite figure seated between her friends who didn't look his way, and pouts.

"Kunugigaoka-san!" Ayasegawa-san jumps out of her seat, slightly distorted behind her face mask. "Put a mask and a coat on before you come any closer."

The person on Manami's right teased, "Okuda, your boyfriend's here." Karma liked this one. What was his name again? Yamaguchi? "Yamamura, Kunugigaoka-san."

"Not her boyfriend," Karma hums. Taking his time with laboratory safety procedures, he stared at the back of Manami's bent head, unresponsive to her surroundings; Karma liked watching her like this, even if it took her attention away from him for long periods of time, even if she was too deep into a world of her own to realize the people around her was talking about her.

Ayasegawa-san hums, "But you want to be."

"It's not impossible," the words muffle as he settles a mask around his face, smirking behind the felt obstruction and approaching at Ayasegawa-san's nod of approval. "I mean, look at you and Yamamura-san~ I sure can feel the unresolved tension you have in here! I appreciate that you're considering Okuda-san's presence in the room~"

Karma snickers at their simultaneous blushing. They weren't actually together, but they look like they're together. Now, he thinks, doesn't that sound familiar… Karma slides towards the other end of the table, across the bubbling chemicals and nauseating fumes that revealed Manami's intense scrutiny and her rapid writing. He paid no heed to Yamamura-san's knowing smile and the unimpressed stare Ayasegawa-san was making as she looked at them back and forth.

Traveling all the way from Ichiōji to Kodakira twice a week just to see her for an hour or two was nothing compared to the thought of not seeing her at all. Had Karma gotten his way he would've come to her everyday regardless of ticket expenses—except Manami hadn't allowed it, so they compromised and he would go twice a week. Still worth it.

Karma catches her moment's distraction as her eyes blink, losing their intense focus on the boiling chemicals, until they settle on him. Her hand twitched and she gave a little jolt. Finally.

"Karma-kun!" Her eyes squint as she beams under the mask. "You're here! Why didn't you say anything?"

Because you wouldn't have heard me regardless. "Ah, senpai finally noticed me," he lamented, head cradled with his hands as he watched her pout. The Bunsen burner was carefully shut off, however, Manami glowered at him when he tried removing the mask: do not remove that. Karma consents with a smirk and shrugs. "Because I like watching you."

She blinks at him, "Watching me write?"

Watch you be amazing, instead, Karma grins and leans back. "Irrelevant. I came to get you, milady. It's already…" The watch strapped to his wrist blinked 6:00 at him. "…6 pm."

"Crap, really?" Yamamura-san gasps, frantically digging through his pockets. He came up with his phone and visibly paled. "I'm dead! Okuda, we're done for today, yeah?"

Ayasegawa-san shook her head, "Still can't believe you have a curfew of all things," she teased as Yamamura-san shoved textbooks and notebooks into his bag. Manami giggles along as she affirms his earlier question, and he sighs in relief.

"Well, I still can't believe we're not together yet, so how's that?" came the wry retort. This is what amuses Karma, and he laughs at Ayasegawa-san's embarrassed blush. Yamamura-san shook his head with a smirk, "Cat got your tongue, Riko?"

"Rack off," she mutters hotly. She turns to Manami, squeezes her shoulder. Behind her, Yamamura-san lingers, eyes going back to her every two seconds. The look of a longing soul. "It's not like he'll leave without me, so I guess I'll be going too. I'll take today's results and transcript them at home. Want help cleaning up, though?"

"Thank you, Riko-chan. I'll be fine, Karma-kun can help me," Karma chuckles at this. Of course he will—he'll help her with anything she wanted to have him do with her.

Ayasegawa-san sends him a look. Karma raised a questioning brow at her. She smiles teasingly, "Take care of Manami-chan," and hauls an amused Yamamura-san out the door after she throws a See you tomorrow, Manami-chan! over her shoulder. It left him and Manami, and Karma sagged forward again, chin cradled in one hand.

"I'm sorry," her giggle was sheepish as she put away the mixtures and sealed them up, and Karma stood to join her wash the used flasks and rods. "Did you wait long?"

"I wouldn't be here if I hadn't," Karma handed her a cylinder, following her to a cupboard, stowing away unused beakers. "Cruel of you."

"I didn't realize it got so late."

"Obviously~"

"But how did you know I was here?"

"Ah… your friend told me," Karma thoughtfully narrowed his eyes. Damn, he already forgot her name and her face again. "You know… The one who looks like Nakamura?"

Manami carefully stows away each item he gives her. "Daimonji-san?"

"Or whoever she is," Karma snickers. He stuck his tongue out at her narrowed eyes. "You forget I don't really know who your friends are."

Manami playfully scoffed, swatting his arm and removing her mask with the other, "But you get along with Yotsuki-kun!"

"That's because his girl's in my school, and he's one-half of my favorite new math term, Mana-squared." Manami took on an endearing flush, and Karma smirks as he approaches her, purring, "Though… I am arguably very biased when it comes to preferring the other value."

Very biased. That was one thing Manami knew very well herself even without his saying it.

Laughing at her flustered silence, Karma shook his head and wrapped an arm around her shoulders, pulling her close to an embrace. He felt her tug on his jacket, and Karma pulled off his mask to kiss her forehead. This is happiness, he thinks, of being able to finally do this after so long, and she was letting him. Sometimes seeing her twice a week did not just cut it. Karma missed her every time—no, Karma always missed her.

Manami fidgets shyly in his embrace, cheeks flushed and eyes unable to meet his as he squeezed her close. She's shy from his affection, but she'd held on to him, and it takes her a few seconds to clear her throat and speak.

"How was your day?" The question is low and soft, muffled and pressed against his chest as a pleasant tingle ran through his senses when he heard this. Interest, sincerity, curiosity. Manami looks up at him with a small grin.

So Karma pinches her cheek. "How about I tell you while we have dinner?" Karma did not care where as long as it was with her. He'd never had the time to explore Kodakira, since the only thing he came here for was her, but Karma was curious where she spent some hour or two with her friends (and Manami had once mentioned this cafe he'd like—that, he swore, was going to be a date for another time) whenever he didn't come by. This was the perfect opportunity to get around the city, score a date in the long run.

"Is it okay?" He lets her go eventually, swiping her bag away when she tried to reach for it. Manami sinks back to her feet with another pout and Karma laughs. "We'll be home late! Won't it be too much trouble?"

"It's okay, as always~ Besides, I wanna know how your day went, too."

On the way out (sneaking, actually, since he was an outsider inside the academic buildings and that was illegal and all), Karma waits for it. It starts slowly, building up his anticipation without meaning to. He's so finely attuned to Manami that it's natural for him to walk in the same strides as she was. Her height's improved a teeny-tiny bit, too; a month ago, she came up to his sternum and now the top of her head brushed his shoulders. Still so tiny and Karma was perfectly sure he wasn't done growing, but Manami was the perfect tiny. He could hold her hand without trouble, lead her where to go.

She could reach for his hand without trouble, like what she's currently doing right now. A small palm brushing against his wrist, too shy to actually slip into his. This is new to her, Karma would remind himself every time she'd hesitate—minimum of twice, maximum of five times. Taking it slow, baby steps. One at a time, just as promised.

"Do you like somewhere specific?"

"Surprise me, Okuda-san!"

They are nearing a crowd, entering through it. At the end of the large congregation her hand is firmly clasped with his. Karma hums a little tune of victory and knows without looking that Manami is pleased with herself as they make it down the streets. He swings their hands together with barely contained glee.

"Here, Karma-kun," she tugged on his hand as they stopped in front of a diner, and through what little gap the sliding doors had, the most mouth-watering smell of spice and broth and oil wafted through. "This is my favorite diner! Yamamura-kun and Riko-chan introduced me to it."

Karma gawked at the sign stationed above. "Okonomiyaki? I didn't peg you for the type," he whistles, impressed and seriously eager to go in. Surprise him she did. The smell was damned good, and if it was this good, he wondered how the actual food would be. Ten times better at least!

"Ah, that's because you can't be choosy around Yamamura-kun, see," Manami giggles, sliding the door open, and Karma feels the warm air of cooking food and bustling activity blast them inside the fairly crowded diner. "And he insists on finishing everything we ordered, even the drinks! He won't let you go until your plate is completely empty."

"That's actually positive influence. Ain't good to let one drop of rice go to waste, wouldn't it?"

Manami's voice hushed as she leaned closer to him, voice teasing, "Fortunately, Yamamura-kun has good taste so it's not a problem most of the time." Karma laughs.

On the counter in front three seats were made available as a group left, and with their finely sharpened navigational skills honed from junior high it was easy to get there immediately without losing it to the other customers. In front of the counter meant they were smack in the middle of all the activity, which meant heat, and Karma shrugged off his jacket, loosening his tie and his cuffs, rolling them to his elbows like a seasoned businessman on his lunch break. Manami had also taken his cardigan off and retied her braids into a bun that hung high on her head; she almost didn't look like herself, and she was cuter than ever.

"Okuda-san," he calls after she ordered for the two of them, chin cushioned on one fist, smile cheeky.

Manami blinks from patting her face dry. "Yes?"

"When are you not cute?"

"When you don't think about it," she says with no pause, calmly and sort of smugly. Karma isn't done though; she may have gotten better with her comebacks, but she was still easy to fluster.

"That's too bad, I always think you're cute," Karma leaned further forward, into her, smirk growing as she leaned back. "Actually, I always think of you, in general."

There it was. She was starting to fidget. "T-Then you must be distracted most of the time."

Weak! "There is a difference between managing my time for you and being distracted because of you. Either way, I don't really care as long as Okuda-san is also making the same effort, see~"

"Hmph," came the less enthusiastic and more embarrassed reply. Translation: I lose and you win.

"Cute."

"S-So are you going to tell me about your day or not?" She flailed, looking at everywhere but him, and Karma relents with a grin as he proceeds to tell her how today had been a curve ball—a surprise quiz on a completely new topic in Social Studies, and it turns out Asano had received prior tutoring because the teacher had been on the same cram school he goes to, and Asano had the nerve to rub his 99 on his face. Karma swore it on his 95 that he would study two new lessons ahead of every subject. Karma also took full pleasure at Manami's look of disapproval because it meant more sleepless nights, and her fussing over him.

"All in good intentions," he shrugged distractedly, watching the cook prepare their orders with barely contained delight. "If I let Asano one-up me twice a row, that would be shameful. I don't do shameful, Okuda-san." From 2nd to 10th place real quick; a mark below 90 for the first time of his life and it had been extremely humbling in the end. He considered it to be one of the darkest points of his life.

"Please don't forget to rest!" Manami scolds, tugging on his arm insistently. "Doing better against Asano-san at the cost of your health will not be worth it."

Karma chuckled. Her concern was heartwarming; he reached for her and ruffled her hair, smiling fondly. "I know, I know. I'm not that irresponsible to put my health second. But I appreciate your concern; you do care for me after all."

"Of course I do," her voice was barely above a whisper, and she cleared her throat as his hand made its way down her head to drape along the low back of her chair. "You're my friend."

Karma smirked. "Just your friend?" Her answering glance was still meek, but meaningful. She knows what he means; it was ironic how she could understand him and also not. That was okay, too. Karma still wanted her and no other, all the same. So Karma slides her chair a little more closer to his until he could brush his fingers on the far side of her waist and finally asks, "How was your day?"


 

In the train, there was little room to move around in from the 8 pm rush hour crowd that is packed into the cab. For Karma, it doesn't matter if he was standing and tolerating the mass of people that swayed and shoved against him so as long as Manami was properly protected from wandering hands and ill intentions. They stood near the doors facing each other; idly, he wondered if Manami realized they made a scene straight out of a shoujo manga—if she even knew what a shoujo manga was. Karma was more than willing to give her some recommendations or three if she didn't.

His hand slid from the compartment wall to play with her right braid, and Manami looks up. "Dinner was great. What about your folks?"

"Ah, they usually get back at around ten, so they eat out most of the time. Why do you ask?"

"Ten, huh? I'm wondering if they're wary of me yet," Karma snickered. "I do keep their only daughter out so late at night for like, twice a week. Don't they worry?"

Manami giggles quietly. The train jostled for a moment. "They do. But they said as long as I get home at all, safe and sound, it's fine." An indulgent smile lit her lips. "And I think dad likes you too much."

"No kidding?" He blinked, surprised and barely above preening. What do you know, not even official but I have his approval. That was generally a difficult feat for most people.

She grinned at his awed expression, "Uh-huh," and then shrugged. "He goes on and on about you, thanking you for 'finally getting me outside like a normal human,' …hmph," her face had a look of mild, embarrassed offense; it looked like she didn't mean to say that out loud. Now Karma preened, smirking at her as she indignantly pursed her mouth. "W-Whatever. Mom is a bit more harder to sway. She worries more, and is not particularly fond of you because of it."

Well, that is easily arranged. If he could charm other school ladies into not ratting him out and cash registrars to give him discounts on every priced item he bought, a worried mother was nothing troubling. And since this was Manami's mother, he would make himself extra polite and forthcoming for whatever wariness she had for him, and win her over. It wouldn't do to have a negative first impression. Plans and schemes being made, Karma restrained his smirk.

"That's only natural, but I have my own oath to keep you safe when we're out later than usual." And besides… at the end of the day, what right do I have considering the nature of our relationship, to keep you to myself? Karma let out a wry chuckle, waving off her questioning stare. Limits, he reminds himself. Limits, even if the concept was almost foreign for him.

The train ride is always disappointingly short; Manami's stop was now a minute away, and his was the next one after hers. One train ride away. Hinai Station… Hinai Station… Karma blinked when a finger prodded his stomach area; looking down, Manami is smiling gently at him, and twitched in amusement when he halfheartedly swats her finger away.

"What?" He asked, genuinely curious.

Her hands drew back and weaved behind her. "One of these days, will you have dinner with us?" Though she hid it, Manami twiddled with her fingers behind her—a nervous habit. "Only—only if you want to!"

Manami's thinking about him again; of going home to a perpetually empty house that, despite what she thought, he was used to experiencing. Looking back, it was somehow a sad thought. But no matter how indulgent his folks were about their travels and his freedom, they never fail to be there at the most important events of his life, or how they would come back as soon as Karma called for them, even if for no reason at all. They were not flighty people; at the very least, they never forgot how to be good parents.

And yes, it got lonely sometimes, but it was tolerable. Karma still had people he can be with. People like Nagisa… like Manami.

Affection and gratitude welling in his chest, Karma cupped her jaw and grinned. "I'll even bring some of our special family recipes over." It was worth seeing a sparkle light up her eyes as she nods.

The train slowed as it approached the platform, and Karma tugged the cardigan properly over Manami's shoulders, fixed her scarf. It was still cold mid-April. This cardigan had been his, and it suited the all-navy of her sailorfuku. Karma remembered that day a little over three weeks ago, when she asked him to accompany her to Oku Tokyo for miscellaneous paper submissions. When they had met up in the station she was in full uniform, shivering but smiling, thinking the winter variant and a thin scarf was enough in the cold spring chill. He remembered feeling tad displeased, and also a little amused.

"H-How do I look?"

Intelligent. Happy. Cute. Cold. So Karma laughs and insists she take the cardigan he wore under his coat. In the sailorfuku, Manami was a sight to behold. But Karma wasn't really fixated on her uniform—it's the fact that his old cardigan was on her. His heart thumped. His.

"That looks great on you," Karma grins. "I'll give it you, so use it well~ And you can't say no and return it."

Without pause, "Sure!"

Karma had meant the whole thing to be a joke. He didn't expect her to actually accept. She had this really big smile that made awful aches of affection to well up in his chest that Karma had to look away. He adored her so badly it hurt.

How do I look, she said. Karma wanted to say, you look mine.

"I can do that on my own."

Karma shrugged. "I nurture."

"Like a nurse?" Manami teased, giggling.

Far from it. He smirked back, purring, "Like a boyfriend," and had the full satisfaction of seeing her blush furiously. Karma chortled at her weak push against his chest, wrapping an arm around her and squeezing her close, murmuring, "I'll walk you home, but I know you won't let me."

Manami reminds him gently, "Because we had a deal."

"And I do have my honor," Karma sighed. No matter how much he wanted to do what he pleased with her, Manami's influence was overpowering what he wanted. Pressing a peck on her temple, Karma reluctantly lets her go as the doors finally slide open, a burst of cold air making him stiffen. He pulls her aside to let the others pass first; Manami is still blush-cheeked as she looked up at him, stare expectant and Karma finally relents, smiling, "I'll see you on Tuesday."

"Yeah," Manami sniffs, and her nose was pink. "Please take care on your way home!"

"Always~"

She's out of the car in three steps, behind the yellow line in five before Manami turns, grins. "I'll call you when I get home." The doors slide close then, and she waves as Karma smiles and he does the same until the train moves, faster, until he can't see her anymore. Karma remains standing in front of the doors with tingling cheeks and the memory of Manami's warmth in his hands as his smile drops.

"And I was wondering if you could accept my confession, and make me yours."

Karma had sincerely thought he had been obvious enough. Those phone calls, the outings they do together, alone, the things he does for her and with her. The insistence of making her his assassination partner, the constancy of his presence in the lab after classes. And he'd given her his second button, too, so, Karma thought that to be enough reason for everything if she ever needed confirmation of what his intentions were. Manami is a smart girl, he'd reasoned. She would have figured it out after the second button gig.

Her 'but I don't understand why it's that important' nearly broke his heart until he remembered that the girl he fancied had been socially challenged and so, naturally, had no knowledge on social trends. Maybe not so much as now, but it just further endeared her to him, even if it goes without saying that sometimes…

There was beauty in the pleasure of being able to understand Manami through her transparency, though sometimes it hurt. Was it so hard to believe that he had feelings for her?

There was little room for anything else when ambition took up most of her heart. He'd listened to her dreams and wondered often to himself if he had his share of space; it was possible that Karma did, if she was always so willing to hold his freaking hand, accepted his company and generally liked his presence. Liked me. Karma knew she liked him without realizing that she did. She wasn't aware of the fondness in her eyes and how lovelier it made her look when that fondness crept to her cheeks and curved her mouth to the smile that was his when she looked at him, up at him, and how Karma had to fight himself to keep it together and not kiss her because he knew she wasn't ready. Taking one step forward and two steps back when eggshells cracked.

But Karma was patient. He was plenty patient; patience was an important virtue, especially when good things awaited at the end.

His end just happened to contain an Okuda Manami, and for that end, Karma was willing to wait.


 

Chapter 2: Two

Chapter Text


"I don't get why you always get that juice box."

There's something almost like disgust in Daimonji's voice as soon as Manami poked a hole into the tetra pack, the strawberry milk cold and sweet. It was currently lunch period, and there was no blueberry available today from the vending machines; Karma always said strawberry was second best to none, even if he never succeeds on trying to get her to try it. Today was the only exception, and he'd probably sulk for not being able to witness her compliance today. Manami blinks, sucking slowly through the straw.

"It's not blueberry though. And it's milk…?"

"Milk box. I meant that Okuda-chan is always buying that specific brand," Daimonji stresses, her nose crinkled. She blinks away flaxen bangs and bites into her carrot with a frown. "Brand product aside, dairy is still disgusting."

Ayasegawa laughs, "Sora-chan, your dairy discrimination is getting old."

"Dairy is my daily cause of discomfort, and for that, my discrimination is justified."

"That's because Sorano-san is lactose intolerant. Plus it's fun when you run like hell for the toilets every time you accidentally ingest dairy." The milk box that Manami holds is suddenly snatched away, and before Manami could react there's a new, unopened milk box that replaces it. Blueberry. Startled, Manami turned wide eyes to the newest person and met amused, similar eyes that wink at her. "Hi."

"Yotsuki-kun!" Manami beams. "I was wondering where you were. And where did you get this? I thought they ran out already!" She cradled the milk box with obvious gratefulness.

Yotsuki-kun beams back. "I had to run errands for Azumi-sensei," he places a plastic bag on Manami's desk with two more packs of blueberry milk. While Daimonji eyed them with obvious distaste, Manami looked through them with obvious delight. "As for your question, I bought the last three because there were guys behind me that also wanted them. No regrets."

"Mean," Ayasegawa giggles, amused.

Manami beams. "Thank you! You shouldn't have, though."

"All's well, besides, Karma-san said that was your favorite." Yotsuki shrugs.

"Karma-kun said that?"

Yotsuki smiles wryly. "It's kind of hard not to remember when he keeps complaining because you won't try his favorite. Also, Kouichi, shoo, move away from my twin," he kicks at the legs of a scowling Yamamura's chair until he slides closer to Ayasegawa.

Yamamura hisses, "There are four tables here, one for each of us. Get your own desk or you can't sit with us, hog."

"There's plenty of space between you and Ayasegawa." With a pleased smile, Yotsuki settled beside her. "It's bad for us twins to be separated, you know? It weakens our bond."

Manami shares his amused grin with a giggle. It's true that they look so alike they could pass off as twins. But between personalities and attitudes, they were far apart. And when it came to academics, they rarely ever agreed on something; strengthened from the fact that Yotsuki and also Daimonji belonged to class 1-2, and the only subject Manami shared with him is maths. Come November of Oku Tokyo's science exhibition, only one freshman section, the whole class, would be given scholarships based on their chosen universities.

Manami had her sights set on Sakuba University, and while she did not doubt her chances of getting in, the expenses and cost of studying in it was another matter entirely.

"If you didn't have a girlfriend," Daimonji smirks, leaning forward and glowering at Yotsuki. "You would've made Kunugigaoka-san very worried."

"No… If I didn't have a girlfriend, I'd remain pining after my best friend, because they're the same person."

Yamamura snorts, "Cut your cheese and eat your lunch."

"Speaking of cheese, Manato, you dish-faced starfish, don't you dare think I didn't know it was you who put cheese in my sandwich yesterday!"

"Ah… Sorano-san, what kind of insult is that…?"

The next 20 minutes of lunch goes by in a blur as they go through Daimonji and Yotsuki's daily verbal volleys, eventually sidetracked to a brief group discussion when Yamamura asked if he could go through Yotsuki's notes. When the bell rings, students from different sections come and go for next period; desks and chairs screeched as they slid back to proper places and re-occupied before the next teacher came. Yotsuki pats her head and flashes a peace sign at Yamamura's scowl, and Daimonji playfully waves good bye as they leave for their class.

When Suiko-sensei enters and starts next period, Manami is already buried in reactive catalysts and soluble compounds.


On Fridays, Manami didn't have research obligations. In class, roles were divided, and Manami was scheduled to put on her lab coat and contribute to the class project Tuesdays to Thursdays. If she tried helping out on other days, Yamamura and Ayasegawa often had to bodily drag her out of the laboratories citing breach of contract and care for her mental health, with added footnotes of You've contributed so much already, at least take the rain check! It doesn't stop her from trying, though. Manami tries not to sulk every time she faced their denial.

It was one of her secrets that she never told Karma—though, she suspects, it won't be long before Karma-kun found that out, too. He had an interesting network of sources, and sometimes, for all his nonchalance and smiles, Yotsuki often hung around Karma when Ayasegawa and Yamamura couldn't keep them company. It pleased Manami to see her high school friends get along with her junior high school friends, too.

Yukimura and Kanzaki had already expressed positive interest in knowing them; it was just a matter of arranging a common time and freeing up schedules. Manami had high hopes. Yukimura-san would like Riko-chan, definitely. And Kanzaki would surely appreciate Daimonji's rather intimidating game collection. For now, it seems the females in her friendships would be the ones to connect. Nagisa, according to Karma, was currently under some kind of training only he wouldn't say what, and Sugino was busy with baseball. Karma liked Yotsuki and Yamamura enough; it made her smile as she waved good bye to Ayasegawa, only to stumble as something pulled her back by the bag.

Manami turns to find Nonoe-san, the girl on her left every last period, her eyes shiny, and her cheeks suspiciously flushed red. Fever?

"Hey," came Ayasegawa's annoyed reprimand. "Nonoe, don't be rude."

"S-Sorry," Nonoe blurted, giggling nervously. Shy? Manami was at loss; it was like looking into a mirror of her former self. "Um… sorry, Okuda-san."

Despite Ayasegawa's wary eyes, Manami smiled politely. "It's okay… But what can I do for you, Nonoe-san?" She can't imagine what, though. Aside from the few instances of returning each other's fallen possessions, a few questions about organic matter, Nonoe was but a mere seat mate. However, a seatmate in need is a person in need.

Nonoe took a deep breath, and before Manami knew it, she had thrust a cream colored envelope towards her, bent at the waist, and Manami flinched in surprise, nearly taking a step back herself. Ayasegawa and a couple of their loitering classmates join in on her surprise, stirring a slight commotion.

"N-Nonoe-san?" Did she owe her money? Is that what the envelope is all about? Manami blinked furiously.

"Can—can—!" Nonoe faltered, but cleared her throat, tried again in a firmer voice. "This is…!"

Yotsuki chose that time to interject an, "Are you confessing to Okuda-chan?" only to be shushed.

"What?"

"No!" Nonoe squeaked. "I—I was just… I wanted Okuda-san to give this to… to Kunugigaoka-san!" That incited a round of hoots and clamoring, but mostly out of surprise than encouragement. Nonoe looks up at her with an embarrassed smile, but Manami admired the hard-set of determination in the tremble of her hands that held out a letter. "I wanted to… to do it myself but… He's not here, and I couldn't wait any longer! Will you give it to him when… when you see him, Okuda-san?"

"So Manami-chan is a messenger." Ayasegawa deadpanned. Unlike Manami, she didn't seem to be too fond of her audacity. Manami pouted at her, but she was only shrugged at. "Say no."

"Okay…" Manami disregards the unimpressed look that Ayasegawa gives her. She accepts Nonoe's letter, smiling unsurely at her as she slowly straightened up. "I'll take it to him."

"But Kunugigaoka-san is yours!" Cried a group of girls. Manami flushed; what?

"N-No, he isn't!" Whatever made her classmates assume that? Manami laughed nervously at Nonoe's confused, expectant expression.

"Okuda-chan, you're making a very big mistake," Yotsuki exclaims along. "I'm your twin, your voice of reason! Please listen to me!" He shared the laughter that erupted, and even Yamamura grinned along, shaking his head.

Nonoe looked hesitant by then. "Are you sure? I-I mean… I understand if you're dating Kunugigaoka-san…"

Oh! So this is a love letter for Karma-kun! But Manami however, couldn't quite hold that thought as Nonoe's words sunk in, and she couldn't control her blushing anymore. What is up with everyone today? The teasing was worse than usual!

"I-I'm not dating him, honestly! He's…" A friend? A partner in crime? It didn't sound right to call him just a friend anymore, for some reason. Manami cleared her throat. "W-Whatever, um… I'll still give him your letter… so, please don't worry!"

Nonoe managed a smile. "Thank you, Okuda-san!" She all but ran out of the room, embarrassed, but definitely more bright-eyed than before. Manami stands with shifting feet, feeling confused and slightly overwhelmed, and looks at the letter in her hands meant for Karma. Fanning it lightly, a flowery scent drifted up her nose. An actual love letter.

A weight presses on top of her head. Yotsuki was the one who had his arm on her head as he says, "You will regret saying yes, Okuda-chan."

"You keep saying that… but why?" Manami slid the letter between pages of her notebook. If she got the time right, the library would be open today… I could drop by and give him the letter!

Ayasegawa manages to encircle her arm with hers. "There is a reason why Kunugigaoka-san is called Kunugigaoka-san, Manami-chan."

"Everyone keeps conveniently forgetting his name is Akabane Karma-kun," Manami hums, frowning. "And I still don't understand why I will regret this."

Daimonji, who had just arrived but had gotten filled in by another classmate, snorts. "Okuda-chan is made up of wit and cute but with a fine sprinkle of osmium."

"Osmium is brittle. I am not." Manami huffs. She doesn't notice the amused looks that they share in a private moment.

Then Yamamura hums, "So you admit you're smart and cute?"

"Thank you."

Her dry acceptance made Yotsuki chortle, prompting him to pat her head. Pushing his arm off of her head with a playful huff, Manami stepped back to fix herself up and smile. "So I'll be going on ahead. Are you sure my help is not needed…?"

"Not on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays, shorty." This was Section Leader Yamamura who glowered sternly at her, giving her an 'I'm watching you' gesture that she grinned bashfully at. "Understood?"

"Yes, sir."

"Also, don't forget to forget about giving Karma-san the letter!" Yotsuki snickered.

.

Ayasegawa pursed her lips as they watched Okuda make her way across the courtyard through the windows. Past the gates, into the streets, and Daimonji sighs. The bell rings and it's 4 pm. They're officially 30 minutes late for the intelligence gathering, which is penalized by section leaders. However, it was obvious that Yamamura couldn't care less, and apart from class 1-2's uppity section leader Nakatani Hagumi-san, no one really followed through the penalties.

It is Yotsuki who breaks the ice. "I don't think Okuda-chan got the joke. The most obvious characteristic of osmium is its density."

They all share amused looks. Then Ayasegawa shrugs on her backpack, waving off Yamamura's attempt to hold it for her. Scoffing at Yotsuki's knowing smirk, she smiled when Daimonji swatted the back of Yotsuki's head. "Is it just me, or was Nonoe a little too extra?"

"What, like she's faking it?" The question was rhetorical, careless. However, Daimonji thoughtfully blinked at her own words. "Uh… huh?"

"I don't know." Ayasegawa pursed her lips. "Maybe it's just me."

Yotsuki whistled. "Ooh, a third party this early? Rich, but isn't it too timely?"

"I think," Yamamura cleared his throat, shoving Yotsuki off of his desk. Yotsuki put him in a headlock in return, growling playfully as Yamamura socked his gut to free himself. "We should be going to the labs."


For fun, and to kill time even though he'd joined so many clubs that demanded active participation post-classes, Karma is currently part-timing in a public library, scheduled Friday afternoons and Saturday mornings. He wasn't in it for the pay, he said. When he'd first mentioned it Manami didn't believe him, except he'd brought evidence through a tabulated work shift schedule along with accomplished data forms he signed himself (he'd bragged about being able to flawlessly plagiarize an uncle's signature, foregoing his parents' since their signatures could be traced by the school; this one bit worried Manami the most).

"I could work on my interpersonal communication skills better, plus, some extra cash doesn't hurt."

Manami, as understanding as she tried to be, still couldn't understand this logic. "But you communicate with me just fine."

Karma had given her an appreciative stare, though his laugh was a tad ironic as he stole her last bites of karumeyaki. He smirked at her displeased pout. "Unfortunately, not everyone is like Okuda-san."

"And Karma-kun is not allowed to work part time in the first place."

He scoffed. "Says who?"

Manami remembers Isogai, the reason for his dropping to class 3-E and what consequences Karma would face if the school found out he broke one of its rules again. She wonders what punishment Karma would face, but hopes he wouldn't be caught. "The school."

"They can't find out if I'm not using my real name for work!"

"What?"

"What?"

More often than not, Manami finds herself forgetting to visit despite the promises she made of stopping by. Not that she could help it; between piles of homework and the demands of their class project, she needed to make use of her after-school time wisely. But that stops today, she thought with cheer as she stood in front of the place, having been guided by the map he'd drawn for her a month before. It surprised her to find the common area filled with kids as went she went inside, engaged in hushed clamoring and an occasional authoritative shushing filtering the giggles and babbling. The common area was closed off by smaller shelves, and near its entrance a sign read RAISED TO THE POWER OF WORDS.

Manami blinks and wonders if the library was reserved for this and would have backtracked outside if not for a pull on her sleeve from below.

It's Karma, crouched down with a playful grin and half-hidden behind a discount sign. He's wearing a paper hat with a design that looked like a butterfly with some color past the lines, with stickers of flowers and stars pressed at the bottom. Manami bit back giggles.

"Pretty onee-chan came too late for her own hat, but she can still get a loot bag after the seminar."

"I wonder why Karma-kun can't say hi like a normal person." His grin curves wider as he stands, and through the library's smell of paper and ink, Manami gets a whiff of his cologne that lingered also on her clothes, but somehow never smelled the same on her than on him. It's a curious scent.

"Okuda-san!" He shushes, pointing to his name tag. Okamoto En, it read, and En-kun's eyes are sparkling with laughter as he regarded her with a faux air of austerity, arms akimbo, frowning at her. "I'm En today."

"Oh! I'm sorry. En-kun, should I come back at a better time? You look like you're busy…"

He waved off her worried concerns. "Please keep me company, this seminar's the second wave and unfortunately it ends at 6, so I'm stuck here till then."

"So you're needed right now?"

"Not unless I show my face to those kids and my superiors, then I won't be," he narrowed his eyes at their surroundings. "Come on, any more second spent with these kids and I might catch their cooties."

"I-I thought you said you're stuck here." Manami resisted as he started to pull her outside, frowning her confusion. If they leave, he'd get into trouble!

"I can't go home yet, silly. That's what would get me in trouble," he snickered back, shaking his head. "I need to clock out first."

"Oh."

"Besides, you're here for me, aren't you? Can't imagine you going all the way here for a library."

Manami giggled, "I guess so." She lets Karma lead her back outside, amused at his antics, trying to stay hidden. And when they make it back outside, Karma breathes in deeply and exhales loudly into the cooling, sun-setting hour, rocking back and forth as he stretched to his full height. The street is quiet, and once in a while a car may pass but that too, is lost to the peace. They sit at the curb a little off-ways from the main entrance, away from the hubbub.

"What's going on in there?"

"Some seminar for kids," he sighed, taking off the paper hat to brush back his hair. "It's some reading development program. Today's the first day, and all elementary schools within the area's required to attend. Thankfully I'm only up to 9 am tomorrow, so I have one last wave to help with."

He drops the paper hat on her head and smirks at her baffled gawking, so Manami retrieves the hat, waving it at his face. "Who made this?"

"Isamu, cute kid that one," he drew one of his legs back and his knee bumped against hers. And it felt deliberate, so Manami bumped back. "He's like a little Kurahashi-san and everything. He said he keeps his beetle collection a secret because his dad didn't like creepy crawlies. He drew the scarlet lily on my hat!"

Manami blinked down at the paper hat, at what she thought was a butterfly. "I thought this was a butterfly—"

"Shh!" Karma laughed, covering her face with his palm, and Manami squeaked in protest. "If the child believes it's a beetle, then a beetle it is."

"How are you sure this is a scarlet lily?" Manami narrowed her eyes. "It could be a cardinal beetle!"

"And how are you so sure about that, hmm?"

Manami gave him smug smile. "I don't just study one branch of science, Karma-kun. Kurahashi-san and I have often collaborated before we went to class E!"

Karma let out a surprised drawl, the corners of his lips quirking as he listened to her previous tales of experimentation, including the horrors of Kurahashi's tears and last-minute change of plans when their test beetles and insects had to be subjected to noxious, trial pesticides—most of their work together revolved around trying to create an immunity so when Kurahashi's beetles are out in the open, her mother wouldn't accidentally kill them off while gardening.

That was all for naught, of course—they had been close to completion, except by then, classes were ending and the class E notice was issued and they've been too preoccupied with Korosensei to continue ever since.

"That got me thinking actually, what kind of masterpiece could you, Kurahashi-san, Takebayashi and Itona put together?" Karma's smile evolved to a scheming smirk. "I'll bet something highly catastrophic! That's a science project the world can't miss out on." His eyebrows raised up and down suggestively, his stare luminous with idea and mischief. It made her heart warm, seeing his excitement.

"That's a nice thought," Manami agreed. "It's too bad we didn't have the chance to come together…"

Karma ruffled her hair, "Never say never! Who knows, maybe during our class reunion the four of you would click!" And then he paused. His mouth twitched. "Hey, wait. Speaking of reunions…"

"Hm?"

"It's not that I don't want you here, but I'm surprised you came today," Karma drawled, smile pleased. He is stretching his legs in front of him and he leans back on his palms, head canted towards her, watching her curiously. "I'm touched, but I was wondering what took you so long."

Manami can't stop her cheeks from blushing out of shame from his accusing glance and lowering her eyes from his searching, pointed stare. Oh, she had no excuse at all.

"I-I'm sorry, I have nothing to say for myself." Squeezing her hands together by her knees, Manami offered him a sheepish, apologetic look. "I keep forgetting… and I'm really, really busy! I'm so sorry!"

For a moment he says nothing; the paper hat is taken from her lap, and Manami shivered from the breeze, pulling the cardigan closer to her. Karma's lips quirk, and then he snorts in helpless amusement. She didn't understand. Was he mad and making fun of—Manami ends up flinching when he pushed the paper hat back on her head lopsidedly. Karma is grinning when she looks back up at him. "I was kidding, chill! You don't owe me your time, okay? Spend time with me because you want to spend time with me."

Timidly, Manami nods, hesitant. "A-Are you sure?"

"Perfectly sure, and you know perfectly well that time I spend with you is time I always enjoy." Oh, his way with words. Her heart raced, and her blush is different. Karma enjoys flustering her, and it shows through his vaguely cloying smirk. "What, Okuda-san? Did I make your heart race?"

Manami did not deign him an answer, even as his chuckle ran knowingly.

"Aww, that's cute~" Manami shuts him out because that's all she could do at that moment. Karma did not exploit her confused feelings often, but when he did, he leaves her rattled, blushing, and more overwhelmed than ever. But Manami doesn't really expect him to stop at her expense; he wouldn't be the Karma she was fond of if he up and did everything she told him at the drop of a hat.

That's fine, she guessed. I wouldn't have Karma-kun any other way.

"Shut up," she dared huff, huddling into her book bag with a pout, trying hard not to roll her eyes when his snickers continue.

His voice is playful, challenging. "I'll shut up when you tell me something that'll shut me up. A confession, maybe? Ah, but—"

She hears the word confession and the rest of what he tries to say is lost to her. Confession! Manami remembers the part of the reasons why she's come here in the first place; the letter from Nonoe! Manami tuned out his chatter, digging out her notebooks and searching through them almost frantically. Karma was quite take aback to see an envelope suddenly pushed towards him, leaning backwards to avoid its edge bumping against his nose.

"Oi, oi," an eyebrow quirked, he spared the letter a glance and nothing more, peering at Manami above it. "If used correctly, paper can be quite deadly. Have you watched Read or Die? Or ROD the TV at least?"

"ROD the… TV? Ah, I haven't watched television in months, though."

"Stream it! Those paper sisters take cutting-edge on a new level!"

Manami wagged the envelope. He is stalling me! "Karma-kun! It's for you. Please take it."

"I could smell the convenience store-bought cologne that love letter's covered in," Karma's nose twitched. "And flowers? That's not your style, Okuda-san. You smell like home."

Manami paused. There was no teasing lilt to the tone of Karma's voice when he says those last words. It came out normal, like an ordinary follow-up to his words. You smell like home. "That's… um, it's not from me."

"Oh. I knew that." Manami raised her eyebrows at him and wagged the letter again until Karma sighed, grumbling and snatching the letter from her hand, shooting her an annoyed look as he set about to read the letter. "Fine. I see how it is, miss Poison Glasses."

"Please just read it."

He said she smelled like home. What did that mean?

"I just did." He produced a pen from his pocket, scribbled something on the paper, and then Karma is quick to fold it back, smoothly sliding the letter back into its flowery scented confines. "It's well-written for a love letter that's only five sentences long. Also, Nonoe Hana sounds like a cute name, but I like Okuda Manami better."

Well, now he's just flirting again. "This isn't about me… Nonoe-san likes you, and she's going to want your answer to her letter… I think."

"Do you like this Nonoe-san person?"

"Um, she's nice… and we don't talk much, since we share only last period."

Karma hands back the letter and wags it in the same manner as she did, so Manami reluctantly takes it back. "So Okuda-san doesn't know this person well enough to give me a direct answer." Manami nods. "Then I need no further criteria!" So Karma slung an arm around her shoulders, curling around her head to nudge her cheek against his.

"You're not going to consider Nonoe-san in the first place… are you?" She didn't have to look to see if he was smiling. Even when her cheeks burned when she felt his lips on her forehead, Manami kept her eyes on the idle street, looking at anything but him.

Karma nosed her hair with a small sigh. "It's you or nothing."

"Oh. I see." Manami coughed. Her voice had wavered. "Wait, Karma-kun, listen. I've been thinking…" Through what she could see his eyebrows had risen, and Karma hummed questioningly, so Manami clears her throat to put strength back to her voice. "You see… I've been wondering why you have to go all the way from Kunugigaoka to my school when we could meet halfway in the middle."

Manami leans back so she could look at him better.

"Like this! Like… where we currently are. Isn't it practical?"

"Emotionally or financially?" Karma leaned away from her swat on the arm, letting her have her space back with a pout. "Financially, sure, but come on, let me have my two days~"

Manami pouts back, because it's clear he doesn't understand what she was trying to say. "I'm not saying I've changed my mind. We made a deal, and… like you, I keep my word! Just… that, you said you joined so many clubs, t-that's why I think you could spend your time more wisely by participating in them rather than… you know."

Karma pauses, and then blinks. There is wonder in the inflection of his words when he finally replies seconds later, "I dropped half of them." And then Karma grins, looking pleased as he nods, mumbling almost to himself. "So, that's why you don't want me to visit everyday…"

The moment after that, Karma makes this interesting mix of a growl and a whine.

"God, you're so cute it makes my poor heart race!" Karma runs his hands through his hair, which is also the color of his ears at the moment. Manami averts her eyes in similar embarrassment, wringing her fingers and their knees bump again, and almost yelps when he shuffled closer than before, pointedly glowering at her. "Okuda-san, are you ready to meet me in the middle?"

"What—"

A beat's pause. Manami purses her lips, unable to decipher the question because it sounded as if there's something beneath its surface, while Karma stares back. Karma's questions always had layers upon layers of meaning, for while his favorite subject is mathematics, he favored wordplay for games. And even if he'd made it blatantly clear he held feelings for her, Manami was not an exception to these games. Karma looked as if he understood her silence, and smirks.

He pats her head, "Don't worry. You make the train fares worth it when you surprise me like this."


"It's not worth it."

If looks could kill, Ayasegawa and Yamamura would've been both dead from the glares they were giving each other, trying to stare each other down. From across, Manami wonders if Handa-sensei couldn't tell the difference between monosaccharides, disaccharides and polysaccharides because he marked those items wrong, or if he was just plain incompetent. Though as soon as she thought of that, Manami cringes and decides it's way too mean, trying to convince herself maybe he just misread the questions while he was checking that's why he marked her wrong, even if Manami knows she would have perfected the quiz.

"I'm the one doing this, so I say it is."

Every part of her rebelled against the 97, fighting herself if she could just stay put and accept the 97—better than the embarrassment of marching over to the faculty room and trying to dissuade the indomitable Handa-sensei that he'd marked her wrong, that her answers were correct and he was the wrong one. Manami tried hard not to fume.

"You know, I remember someone saying he'd do anything I said."

Sigh. "Riko, matters of the heart is different when it comes to matters for the art." A thump. "This is my personal project. I may be heads over heels for you, but you can't dictate over my decisions like that."

But if Manami tried anyway… Maybe Handa-sensei would hear her out and recheck her quiz, and she'd have her 100, and all would be in peace. Yes, Manami nods to herself, fingers smoothing back the creased edges of the paper where she clenched it, there's no harm in trying. Karma-kun would be disappointed if I didn't fight for something I'm right in; especially if it was over something like this.

"W-What does that have to do with this!? And… I'm just saying my thoughts about it." Huff. "Fine, sorry."

"Your thoughts are not needed right now because you're rude. But don't worry, I still like you, so apology accepted."

"Shut up."

Ayasegawa and Yamamura both jumped when Manami's hands slam on the desk, fists gripping her paper so tightly she would have ripped it. Try as she might, she couldn't help but fume anyway, so Manami's startled when something thumps her on the head that shook her out of it; Yamamura wryly looked back at her, having been the one to swat her gently on the head with the notebook.

Manami huffs and pouts, "W-What was that for?"

"You're being weird. Are you pissed off or something?"

"Handa-sensei marked three items on my quiz wrong…" Ayasegawa gestures the paper over, and Manami slid the paper towards her with lingering feelings of conflict. "I should have gotten a perfect score."

Ayasegawa narrows her eyes at the paper. "I got these items right." She digs under the space of her desk, producing the same paper. Though she got an 89, all three items wrong on Manami's paper were correct in hers. "Now, that's injustice. Ah, that Handa-sensei, picking on all the smarter kids! You should take it to the faculty right now and complain!"

"I'll go with you," Yamamura manages to pry off a small box from Ayasegawa's hands, who scoffed her indignation. He smirked back as he shuffled away from her, on to Manami's side. "I need Daimonji's advice for this one since Riko is useless."

"Sorry for not being your definition of girly."

Manami attempted to take a closer look at the mysterious box, and Yamamura's reply is to shove it into his jumper. Manami pouts. "What's that for, Yamamura-kun?"

"God, why can't everybody mind their own business?" He snickers, pulling Manami out of her chair as he says so and dodging the crumpled paper Ayasegawa threw at him. "Sorry, it's classified until it's finished. We'll be back!"

"I'd rather only Manami-chan returns!"

"You wish!"

In the hallway, Yamamura kicks away three rough-housing fellow freshmen that blocked their path and laughed when Manami lectured them to handle the boxes of cans of aerosol properly. The teacher's lounge was at the far end of the right hall; Yamamura found time to coach her on what to say when she confronted Handa-sensei, and all other things she missed out on when she left last Friday. Apparently Ibara and Miwaki, their assistant section leaders, had gotten into an argument over the hypothesis the class had already agreed upon. Miwaki fought reactants are finite, and there couldn't just be one reaction; Ibara stuck by the book and refused to hear him out—the resulting argument made it to the supervising teacher, so they were both put out of duty for at least three days starting next week. Yamamura had been furious too, and their punishments from him involved cleaning for their classmates after-duty for a week.

"They argued over the yield?" Manami couldn't hold in her disappointed tone. "Wasn't Miwaki-kun present when we finalized the proposal a month ago?"

Yamamura sighed. "Physically, yes, but apparently Kei had been absent here," he tapped his temple twice, rolling his eyes. Manami stifled laughter and shook her head. "It's still early, maybe I could make a request if you could take his place since you've done a lot more work than him. Honestly. He's almost always absent during his turns anyway."

"We should give him a second chance," Manami soothed. "Maybe he has a lot of other things going on."

"Those other things can't be more important than the scholarship being offered if we bag the fair at November," Yamamura scoffed. "You understand, right, Okuda? I have other… interests, too, but my studies will always be three steps ahead of those things."

Manami looked up at him. Ahead of Riko-chan, she silently thinks. Yamamura was this: fairly irritable, a little standoffish, maybe even foolish, like Karma had once secretly said to her, even though she didn't understand how. He was appointed section leader by default since he'd graduated from Oku Tokyo's junior high, but he also proved he was worth the title. They wouldn't be this far into their project without his persistence; Yamamura always shoved because he thought pushing at first try is a waste time. For that reason, Manami respected him a lot.

"Yamamura-kun is definitely a practical person," Manami concludes, smiling when he spares her a curious glance. "I can't see why Karma-kun would call you foolish when you're anything but."

"Ah, how dare that Kunugigaoka-san, I think I know what he means." Yamamura scoffs with no malice, just dry amusement. "But I'm glad you think that way. Some people like to call me an unfeeling block of ice instead."

Manami pouts. "That's mean."

"Sure is," he shrugs, indifferent. He seems to remember something, because Yamamura straightened up, squinting at nothing in particular as they passed by class 1-5, almost to the teacher's lounge. "By the way, what happened to Nonoe's letter?"

Manami blinks. "Um, Karma-kun wrote his reply on the letter itself. I'll probably be able to give it to her at last period."

"So you don't know what he responded with?"

"Uh…" Manami's cheeks flamed. Could she actually say what Karma had told her? It's you or nothing, and, You smell like home. His answer had been right there in front of her, but she was clueless how to handle it. Her eyes flickered shyly up at the curious Yamamura, to her shoes, to the windows, before glancing at her test paper and back to her shoes again. "Well…"

"I guess you already do." I'm an open book! If Yamamura had been amused with her, he was polite enough to hold back from saying something that might embarrass her more. "But if you're still doubting, Nonoe has a guy already."

What? "Huh?"

Yamamura patted her head. "Nonoe Hana? Daimonji's grapevine is surprisingly useful—Riko first questioned it, but then she couldn't stop calling me that when she really thought about, it did look super suspicious, so Daimonji went ahead and did some research. Nonoe's four years into a long-distance relationship with someone from Shizuoka Prefecture. Heck, even Nonoe's Boyfriend-san knows about Kunugigaoka-san."

Manami sputtered. "I-I don't think I understand, I mean… what? What does…" Why would someone already in a relationship confess to another person!? That's just… unspeakable, and Manami shifted uncomfortably.

"It means Nonoe is being dishonest," Yamamura halts, taking her elbow and poking her forehead. They're in front of the teacher's lounge. "So you better get inside and take care of it."


 

The letter has been inside her notebook longer than the one and half hour of last period while Manami stews her courage together. Before class started, Nonoe had even greeted her a good afternoon, and Manami barely managed a reply back. She did not know Nonoe well enough, so she was unsure of how Nonoe would react to her inquiries. But Manami knew that she shouldn't be confessing to other people when she was already committed to another. Had Karma accepted the confession, Manami wasn't sure how she'd feel knowing that he was a third party.

No, Manami resolved. I wouldn't let Karma-kun get treated that way, because Karma deserved full honesty from someone who truly liked him! So when the bell rang and the class was dismissed, Manami turned in her seat—towards Nonoe.

"Nonoe-san," Manami cleared her throat, the letter in her hands. There's nothing to worry about. This is just me, worried and concerned. It's not like she was accusing Nonoe, no. Maybe some things were just misunderstood. Manami just wanted to be clear, and Nonoe's bright green eyes showed just that. "I have Karma-kun's response to you."

Manami handed over the letter, and Nonoe blinked. "Oh."

Manami didn't know how to react. Was Nonoe nervous? How was she supposed to react to that? Manami nods and wonders why she can't shake off the feeling of oddness. She looks at Nonoe, observing and remembering how flustered she had been last time Manami saw her. There was nearly no trace of that Nonoe today as she reads whatever response Karma had written. Was it identical to what he told her? It's you or nothing, or something else similar?

No, Manami frets. I can't do this after all. Maybe I'm wrong. Maybe I—

"Oh," Nonoe giggles, and Manami's attention snaps back to her.

"W-What did he say?"

"Mou, Okuda-san," Nonoe smiles, tucking the letter into her notebook. "I've been kind of dishonest." Manami wants to say she already knows, but maybe Yamamura and Daimonji had been wrong, too. "This is just a social experiment. I don't like Kunugigaoka-san that way."

That is not the kind of response Manami had been expecting. Manami gawks at her in disbelief.

"From what Kunugigaoka-san had written, we didn't exactly succeed and we didn't exactly fail, but," Nonoe winks. Manami is totally curveballed. "Results are hopeful! Thank you, your participation played a huge part in this."

Manami stammers, and finds herself asking, "S-So what you said that day… You didn't mean it? Was this a set-up?"

"What? No!" She also didn't believe Nonoe's purposely evasive tone, and pouts. "But Kunugigaoka-san is all yours."

"I-I get that a lot, but why can't everybody m-mind their own business?" Manami honestly didn't know why people were so interested in their affairs.

Nonoe shrugs, smiling widely as she gathered her bag. "Everybody can't seem not to, yes?"

"Y-You have a boyfriend!" Manami blurts, and ends up slapping her mouth with both hands and cheeks ablaze.

"He's part of the experiment."

"He is?"

Nonoe giggles. "Yes, and we're actually meeting up today for a date. But how did you know I have one?"

"I hope you didn't mind us snooping. Daimonji's a gossip guru, so that's how we knew." Manami looks up when Yamamura speaks, two bags slung over his shoulder while a stammering Ayasegawa followed after him. He raised a brow at Manami, and Manami gawked back up at him. "Sorry 'bout that, but we're all for this shorty over here. Plus, Riko thinks your acting skills need some more work."

"Do not speak for me like that, Kouichi!"

"Aww, but Okuda-san believed it."

"I-I'm still here!"


8 p.m.

"Okuda-san? What's this~ I usually do the—"

"Karma-kun, even someone's boyfriend from Shizuoka Prefecture knows you. I think you should stop visiting my school."

"What? Wai—"

Click.


 

Chapter 3: Three

Chapter Text


Observing from across the table, Nagisa's movements are with a subtle, certain sharpness beneath his careful grace. Karma should know; he moved in the same exact way. And should Nagisa put his mind to it, everything on the table could be a weapon, and still the same would go for Karma. Everything, from the small teaspoon to the tablecloth. Or the wads of tissue―stuff them in a person's mouth and nostrils all at the same time until they gagged and suffocated. What an awfully interesting way to die, though Karma wonders if they could sneeze if the tissues were sprinkled with black pepper. He imagines it, and ignores Nagisa's disturbed, confused look when he smirks.

 

And then, back to topic at hand, "Isn't it a little too soon for a reunion?" Karma tossed a cherry in the air, tilting his head back. It landed squarely on his pursed lips, and Karma sucked it into his mouth with an amused smirk, ignoring Nagisa's rolling eyes. "It hasn't even been a year."

"Maehara wants it to be an annual thing, and Nakamura agrees. Let's just say a lot of us are already on board with it."

"I repeat, it hasn't even been a year yet."

Nagisa shook his head. "I don't think they care about that. I guess they just want to keep ties with everybody strong, you know? Everybody's gone their separate ways, but… aside from us, nobody else will understand what we've gone through. One way or another, we'll need that camaraderie to keep us grounded."

There is truth in Nagisa's words that Karma sobered up to. Normal kids as the rest of the world deemed they were to be, class 3-E was special in a way nobody else would understand. Other kids' problems during those days were trivial compared to the pressure of killing the greatest teacher to save a whole planet who wouldn't know what they did. Not that they were after the glory. It still stung to think of Korosensei, though… Maybe the reunion's worth a shot―even if it felt a little too soon.

Karma rubbed his neck. "I guess so."

"So you're going?"

"Heck, yeah," Karma playfully sneered. "If only to see if everyone else hasn't been left out of the height department, unlike someone I know."

Nagisa scoffed, and Karma flashed him a grin. "You say that as if it's a bad thing. Kayano is short, and Okuda-san, too."

"Okuda-san is cute, unlike you. Plus, all my friends are short next to me, Nagisa. How's the weather down there by the way?"

"Make sure you two'll be free by the end of the month!" Karma laughed at the sudden change of topic. Acidly, Nagisa stared Karma down while Karma shrugged his shoulders, pulling Nagisa's uneaten plate of scones towards him. "Did you hear me?"

"You're like one feet away. Of course, dumbass." Through the mouthful of Nagisa's stolen scones, Karma smirked. "Lucky, too. The end of the month happens to be a Thursday."

"What about Thursdays?"

Karma ignored Nagisa's glare―he'd noticed just now that his scones were stolen. "It means Okuda-san and I can go together." Nagisa looked perplexed and Karma blinked. "Something wrong?"

"Is there something else you're not telling me?"

"Being nosy, Nagisa?" Nagisa bristled at the accusation. "I don't see why I have to tell you every juicy bits of my flourishing love life… unlike yours. Maybe I should set you up with some―"

"Karma."

"I like her," Karma grunted. "You know that already. You're basically my love advice expert."

Nagisa's contemplative expression didn't waver even as he narrowed his eyes. "I didn't know anything about Thursdays or any days."

"It's a compromise, since she can't go out with me everyday… We go out two days a week, and some. And can you believe some of her reasons why?" Nagisa prodded him with a rising eyebrow. "She's worried I'm having trouble balancing my club activities."

Nagisa hummed. "But you don't." Karma's snicker is enough answer.

"I dropped half of them, though I know it didn't convince her." Leaning back again, Karma crossed his legs, eyes twinkling. "Not that it'll put a damper on things even if I hadn't. But I… I appreciate her concern."

Nagisa eyed him more knowingly than Karma would have preferred. "It's a little too late, but how is Okuda-san?"

"One step closer to being mine," Nagisa's grimace made Karma laugh for getting under his skin. Teasing Manami is gold, but riling up Nagisa is priceless. Cushioning his chin on a fist, Karma decided to elaborate. "Okuda-san is gearing up for their science fair. It's pretty intense stuff; I have to wait for her one or two hours at most Tuesdays and Thursdays. And… she's adorable in her uniform."

Nagisa half-laughed, half-cringed into his coffee. "I don't need to know if you've developed a uniform fetish."

"You don't wanna know a lot of things when it's coming from me. Bastard." Karma popped another scone into his mouth.

"That's because they're mostly questionable."

"Aww. You hurt my feelings." Nagisa shook his head, and tried in vain to save what's left of his plate of scones. Karma lets him, observes him yet again and pretends he doesn't know that Nagisa is pretending that he's not noticing his observation.

The silence is companionable.

Later on, he and Nagisa would part ways after exchanging high scores from a video game with promises of making it to the reunion, and Karma would watch Nagisa walk away―that was his best friend, according to Manami, and maybe she's not exactly wrong. In assassination classes, the two of them made a formidable duo even if they find themselves fighting for different teams more often than not. They knew each other more than everybody knew about them, had differing opinions but converged at mutual interests. So, maybe Nagisa is his best friend.

Looking back at all the pranks he pulled Nakamura was the one who could go toe to toe with him when things got a little too quiet and uneventful―he figured, then, maybe she was his partner in crime. It is easy to call her a female version of him with all her cunning and sharp tongue if it weren't for the insult it would be to her person. No, Nakamura was no female version of him as she was her own person as Karma is his own. Similar as they are, that's all they have in common. Partners in crime.

What did that make of Manami if two of the titles he associated her with were already taken? Though he knew his answer, Karma still wonders, and he wanders. She is no enigma to pick apart. Manami is simple in her straightforwardness―ironically, that's why it's hard to thread so lightly with her because he wanted to be sure she was sure with her decisions. That is why he wants to completely win her over, with her awareness, even if he knows what she feels however ignorant she was of it.

He calls Manami an hour into his thoughts and spends the rest of the Sunday leafing through her extensive, color-coded, cross-referenced macromolecular chemistry notes and humoring her request to quiz him about them.

He gets every single question right.


Asano is seething. That was easy to see, and being two desks away didn't hinder Karma's observation that Asano's ego is poked by two little errors that marked his defeat. Karma leaned back on his chair, basking in the 100 of his science quiz that happened to have macromoleculars as one-thirds of the whole test and what a pleasant coincidence it was. Manami would love this, Karma preened, smirking at the look Asano threw him, then smiling pleasantly when his arch rival approached.

For Karma, Asano did not do badly with his 98. For Asano, his 98, which is second place, is still just first loser. Karma silently empathizes, but he refused Asano pity. "Two points," Karma clicked his tongue twice. "I won't say we could have been tied."

Asano's jaw clenched, and his words a mere stiff, "Congratulations," but it is surprisingly sincere. He does not crumple the paper, but he is gripping it tightly, and Karma whistles.

"Thanks." Karma tilts his head to the side, his smile widening to a non-too kind but not malicious curve. Asano merely huffs, and nods. "Wanna know my secret?"

"Not really."

Karma's voice dropped to a stage whisper, "Oku Tokyo covers wider topics." Asano merely smirked back, crossed his arms and looked down at him with his nose up. In the past, Karma would have entertained thoughts of giving Asano an uppercut if only to make him regret turning his nose up on him. "Maybe you should lower your chin and stop looking down your nose at me. You'd be surprised how things have a better perspective when you look forward."

Asano gave him a funny look, and, ignoring his words, he scoffs, "How could you possibly have access to that school's syllabus?"

"Connections," Karma was aware of how vague it sounded, and he knew Asano didn't believe him. Not that Karma cared; as far as he knew, he wasn't about to let Asano in on the workings of his relationship with an Oku Tokyo student―though if he made it sound so obscure, it'll make Asano curious, and a curious Asano sticking his nose into business that didn't concern him was the last thing Karma wanted. So he indulged, just a bit. "I have some friends in there. We hung out just yesterday. Pretty close coincidence, huh?"

The thoughtful look on Asano's face disappeared, and disinterest took its place. The knot of tension Karma felt in his chest disappeared, though he didn't do anything that might give him away―just tilted his head to the side as Asano crossed his arms. He'd snuffed out his curiosity and god forbid he knew where Asano's curiosity took him.

"Well," Asano sniffed. "How timely that had been. A fluke. Stroke of luck."

Karma smirks. "I'm a friendly character. You should be more like me."

"No thank you, I'd rather not be called a washed out imitation of you." Asano's blandness made Karma snicker because he could sense an undertone of irritation behind it. "I'm going now."

"So? What do you need, my permission?"

Asano sneers at him, and walks away with no other words to say. My, oh my, he actually let me have the last word, it was a little disappointing. But Karma shrugs, leaning back against his chair and to take out his phone while the teacher was still handing out their quizzes. Fukui-sensei often took his phone (and sometimes, his earbuds with it) in classes and he always got it back before his class ended because Fukui-sensei was this strict old bat with gaps in his memory and he never notices that Karma had nicked back his phone. It's a funny cycle of rinse and repeat, everyday.

He spams Manami with text messages he sent one by one, just to annoy her. Manami hated it when he did it because sometimes she forgot to put her phone on silent (which was often), and it'll beep repeatedly in class when he did it. Right now… she'd be in her maths right now. He could already imagine her embarassment, and he grins.

Okuda-saaaaan

Let's go to the okonomiyaki place today

My treat!

I know it's monday…

But I have news and I miss you! Pleaseeee?

ψ(`∇´)ψ

He continues spamming her until he receives a long reply in turn, before Fukui-sensei could snatch it off his hands.

Stop spamming me! (´Д` ) It's a good thing I was already checking my phone when you texted me. And my phone is silent today! Couldn't have you waited until tomorrow? But sure, let's go today (^∇^)please no more messages until lunch break. Yotsuki-kun already got sent out to the hall for being on his phone.

Karma laughed under his breath. Little rebel aren't you? Okuda-san, out in the hall for using phone in class, that'd be the day!

I predict that right now, Fukui-sensei is about to confiscate your phone.(^∇^)

A shadow loomed over him not long after.

Not only does Fukui-sensei confiscate his phone, he also sent Karma out in the hall for the rest of the period. Luckily Yotsuki's girl was in that class with him, and she gave notes on what he missed during class at lunch and nicked his phone back for him with a devious smile. Fukui-sensei was none the wiser.


Ayasegawa was waiting with her when he got off the station. She looked miffed, though he learns later that it wasn't him she was mad at but at Yamamura―whose presence was thankfully absent. Not that Karma was any more less than pleased.

They even ended up not going to their okonomiyaki place because Ayasegawa griped about how it reminded her so much of Yamamura and eating there will only make her angrier. And then a book sale had caught Manami's attention, and food for the stomach was forgone for food for the mind as they joined Manami. It's a big store; novels in the second story and reference materials in the first. She had, predictably, darted into the science aisles. Karma would have followed along had Ayasegawa not tugged him into another aisle.

It was suspiciously secluded.

"No offense, but you're not my type," Karma drawled, eyebrows rising at Ayasegawa's seeking expression. "I think we've already established with whom my interests lie?"

Ayasegawa's expression twisted to an affronted grimace. "I'm angry at Kouichi, but not that angry to step all over his feelings. That's insulting, Kunugigaoka-san."

"I'm not a love expert, Ayasegawa-san." Karma crossed his arms. "And you ruined a spontaneous date."

"Which is exactly why I need your point of view and to hell with spontaneous dates."

Karma stared. There's something odd in that tone. And she'd outright ignored his displeasure! Karma smirked uncertainly at her, though to her it would seem merely like a vaguely bland smile. "I should also tell you I'm not exactly the best person to be confiding with."

Ayasegawa shifted from foot to foot with a frown, ignoring his words. "Do you usually tell Manami-chan you love her?" She looked up at him, eyes squinting at his blank face then tugging on the straps of her knapsack. "Do you? You do all these sorts of things for her… and you even come to our school once or twice a week. And… you know, it's just odd. You aren't dating―or, or maybe you are dating, but it's exclusive, and to an outsider, it's a little blurry. People are going to ask questions. And… it doesn't look… proper, I guess?"

Ayasegawa did not look at him in the eye while she said all these probing words. If he didn't know any better, it would have been directly about Manami and him. Nosy little chit. The situation fit, the puzzle pieces aligned perfectly. It's the picture that's wrong. It's easy to see through Ayasegawa and Karma knew who she was really talking about, but fine, he'll humor her. Maybe she'd say something substantial as well.

Bluntly, Karma replied, "I don't care what other people think."

"Why's that?"

"Because she's the one who really matters. I know my intentions, Okuda-san knows them too, and I've been perfectly clear with Okuda-san with what I want from her." Karma paused, then hummed. "Though I must admit her evasion from the topic is frustrating when I know what she really feels―she doesn't understand that about herself, so she runs. Okuda-san runs from the things she feels she can't handle just yet."

Karma wonders when she'll stop running, too. He was waiting with a bottle of water and everything.

He could tell the words bothered Ayasegawa from the way she scowled at him―no, technically not at him. She was displeased, though, at herself. Karma doesn't care, though he wonders what Manami was doing somewhere in these aisles and if he'll have a hard time pulling her head from the dissertation works about air-sensitive organometallics and their relationship to mesogene crystals.

"What if you stop going after her? Will you stop going after her?"

"Not until she tells me herself, no. Okuda-san isn't going to get rid of me that easily."

Ayasegawa looked defeated. And then, she took a deep, wavering breath and her voice is small with uncertainty. "W-What if… one day, she… um, she told you to get lost and didn't actually mean it, but didn't have the guts to make you come back because you actually did it?"

"Beg pardon?"

She began to sound angry. "And just because she didn't mean it, how could you still possibly go on dates with other people when you claim to like her? What the hell is up with that? What an idiot! That's being counterproductive and it's―"

Well. The thing was, Manami never said anything she didn't mean, nor did she ever take her words back. But Karma doesn't say any of these to Ayasegawa. This wasn't his problem.

Karma clicked his tongue, biting back laughter. "I think you're projecting, Ayasegawa-san. I don't date around―you'd best be off thinking no one's that of a big fan of me." Ayasegawa had the dignity to blush. "And lower your voice. This is still a library."

"But―"

"Enough of this," Karma huffed. He ignored her grimace and decided to cut to the chase. "Get straight to the point. We're not―"

"Karma-kun?"

Both of them whipped towards the voice at the end of the aisle where Manami stood, an unreadable look on her face as she studied them. Karma took quick note of his surroundings. Secluded aisle, alone with a girl, speaking in low tones. Relief made him sigh when he noticed he and Ayasegawa weren't anywhere closer. There was no way Manami would think any of it.

"M-Manami-chan!" Ayasegawa grinned, clearly forced. Ah, you're a bad actress, Ayasegawa-san. If possible, she just made their arrangement a lot more suspicious. "You're ready to go?"

"Um, yes," Manami eyed them still and it struck Karma to see that she was, for once, unreadable. Manami is always an open book, and her obscurity at the moment, that was new. New meant… hold on. Is she…? That thought got put on hold when her eyes drifted up, and she blushed furiously. "Why-why are you in the adult section…?"

Ayasegawa managed to look both pale and flushed at once and Karma had to wonder how she managed that feat. It was a little amazing. Karma shrugged.

"I think Ayasegawa-san's figured out that best way to make-up with Yamamura-san is through a make-up se―"

Ayasegawa actually growled. "Don't you finish that sentence!"

"I was about to say serenade. My, my, Ayasegawa-san, I think the adult section has corrupted your thinking processes?" Karma took evil delight over how embarrassed she was. "Maybe you'd have a better chance of patching things up if you go about the traditional way."

"Oh," Manami shifts, shrugging to emphasize the books she cradled. "Well, um, I'm just going to check out these books!"

"We-We'll wait!" Their smiles vanished once Manami was gone. Narrowing her gaze, Ayasegawa puffs up and declares, "We're not finished, Kunugigaoka-san," in the loftiest tone she could muster, and Karma sighs.

"Not that I care, but was it any of your business? About earlier?"

"Yes, because Manami-chan is my friend." Lame.

"Yes, yes, friendship politics," Karma waved her off, ignoring her pointed look, trying not to laugh. "What are you so concerned about, Ayasegawa-san? You're giving me mixed signals over here. One minute it's about you and Yamamura-san, then the next it's me and Okuda-san."

"What makes you think I―"

"Stop," Karma interrupted sternly, and for once, Ayasegawa snapped her mouth shut and regarded him with a mollified look. "You're not fooling me, and you know as much as our situations look similar, they do not. Could be the same page, probably. But you and Yamamura-san are on another book entirely."

Ayasegawa looked stricken. "I just… wanted some… advice." She shifted on her feet, clearly uncomfortable. "I mean… It's not that I could talk to Yotsuki or Sora-chan or even Manami-chan about it. You're an unbiased outsider. Anything you say is impartial. So…"

"You picked me," he drawled. Karma peeked beyond the aisle, checking how far along Manami was in the queue. Two persons away. Six minutes, tops. "I'm warning you, though, again, I'm not the best guy for these kinds of things. So get on with it; what did you do?"

"Kouichi and I had a fight."

"Okay… And what happened before, during, and after that fight?"

Ayasegawa blushed. "You already know how he feels about me… and I―well, he was saying these things like you do to Manami-chan and even though I like hearing it, I didn't like that he was doing it. We fought over it. I keep telling him to stop while he'd say that it was his choice to tell me and not mine to control."

"So you like him back." At her acidic stare, Karma smirked. "Stop glaring, Ayasegawa-san. It's obvious. So what's the catch? What's so bad about Yamamura-san telling you and showing you he liked you?"

"I don't like it!"

"Why not?"

Pause. Then, softly: "It's too much. He shouldn't be so devoted to me like that. It's… it's scary to be… receiving that kind of devotion. I mean, I like him, too, yes, but… but will it be enough to match Kouichi's?"

Karma swallowed. He thinks of Manami, and running, and turning, coming out of hiding, and devotion and what he feels for her. Running away is a perfectly sound tactic. But when will you stop running from me?

"And what about the part where you said he was going on dates with other girls?"

Ayasegawa no longer scowled. She just looked sad. "I told him to stop bothering me, and to go bother someone else who would want to date him because I wouldn't. He's gone on three dates since today."

"I can't decide it was a mere lapse of judgement because of anger, or because you're trying to deliberately screw things up, Ayasegawa-san."

"Join the club," she sighed, her expression twisted. "It's complicated."

"No, you just lack decision." Karma criticized. "Not everything has to be complicated. There's nothing between you two other than your bloody pride, from what I can see."

"But―"

"You like him, and I think you know that he knows. You're the one making it complicated, Ayasegawa-san. He's pretty upfront about it, and since you both know it's mutual… I think you owe him your decision. Then the two of you can go from there, I guess."

He lets her stew in silence over his words, words he too, lets himself think about. Was he and Manami complicated? Who was it between them making them complicated? Did Manami owe him her answer? Does he even have the right to feel that he deserved to have her answer? But she wasn't responsible for what he felt for her. She didn't owe him anything, but this was something else.

And Karma thought his friendship with Manami was already complicated enough.


20 minutes past 1 am, Karma flinches when his phone starts to blare somewhere within his room. Caught off-guard and concentration broken, he moved away from the disorderly desk, annoyed with the distraction. It couldn't be Manami, could it? They've talked over the phone earlier, and she went to bed three hours ago. Rubbing his tired eyes, Karma found the phone buried beneath pillows and blankets; Okuda Manami was flashing on the screen and he'd picked up faster than he could blink.

"Oku—"

"Karma-kun!" She interrupts, sounding rattled and awake. "I'm sorry for disturbing you!"

"How ironic, Okuda-san. You told me not to stay up late, but it looks like you're the one who's wide awake." Karma smirks to himself. "I hope you're not being responsible for trying to mix Red Bull and coffee without me~"

"I don't like energy drinks, remember?" came her harried reply. "Karma-kun, I'm with Riko-chan at Yamamura-kun's house."

Flopping to his bed, Karma blinks. "Pardon?"

"She told you about Yamamura-kun, didn't she? What did you say to her?"

"Aha, that thing with Ayasegawa-san and Yamamura-san must be quite bigger than I thought if she couldn't do it alone, huh?" Karma questions, mostly to himself. Maybe he should just read four more chapters instead of the promised eight.

"Karma-kun!"

The reproach in her tone made his nose scrunch. "Hey, don't blame me, she wanted advice and I gave her advice." Karma hears her disbelieving hum accompanied by the sound of vaguely distinct yelling ("You brought Okuda, too? You're nuts!" "Listen to me—") in the background. "Hear that? That doesn't sound like my advice. Therefore, that's not my problem."

Manami sighs over the line. "I don't get why I'm here, Karma-kun!"

"You are basically Ayasegawa-san's support system. Oh, my. A for effort, Ayasegawa-san, for trying to fix things like this. How long have you been there?"

"Um, 10 minutes. Duration of the screaming match included…?" Laughter bubbled out his mouth as he rolled over to his stomach as she scoffed her annoyance. "Mou. It's cold out here, and I left my glasses! T-This is your fault!"

His eyebrows rose as he snorted. "You just offended me."

"You can stick your offense." Had she sounded just a little more vindictive and less of a sniffling mess of cute, perhaps he would've felt guilty. But not really. Karma rolls back face up, picturing the sight of her indignant pout and cold-stung reddened nose and feels warmth settle to his cheeks down to his heart.

"Make Ayasegawa-san pay for your train fare in compensation for your company." He manages to say this after he regained enough composure to speak. Clearing his throat, Karma adds, "Some warm milk would be great, too."

The clang of steel against concrete, ("Go home or you'll catch a cold!" "Don't change the subject, Kouichi!"), and a brief noise of static. "I doubt that. I paid for the both of us because Riko-chan forgot her wallet because she was hurrying, which I didn't see the point of doing because it's not as if Yamamura-kun would be going somewhere in the middle of the ni—oh!"

Karma perks. "What's up?" There was no answer, but Karma could hear all three voices, two of which were yelling while Manami was trying to subdue both, words like take you home, stupid, Kouichi, some more indistinct yelling and finally, the sound of running, and sighing, drifting to his side. Closer now, he hears Yamamura say, "Okuda, come inside the house for a minute, I'll just chase that girl down," and then, another sigh.

Karma whistles. "Sounds eventful."

"I-I'm sorry about that…" Karma laughed at her exasperation. "Looks like we'll be staying here overnight!"

"What about your folks?"

Manami sniffs. "They're not pleased with Riko-chan at the moment. I'll call them after you! But… my glasses… Ah! I'll just leave extra early so I have time to come back home!"

"That's a whole lot of effort and you know it."

"Better than being good as blind all day, Karma-kun. Not to mention my uniform."

Yes, Karma nods to himself, he supposed he could see reason in that. It'd be no good if she didn't go to classes in her uniform. Her cute uniform. "Okay… how's having Ayasegawa-san act as your eyes as compensation instead?"

Manami giggles, and all Karma wants to do is to listen to it until he fell asleep. Damn, it was really late… those chapters would have to wait. "Picking on Riko-chan, Karma-kun? You shouldn't!"

"Is that so? Why's that?"

"Because I heard you, you know." He doesn't follow. Karma makes a confused noise that prompts her to clarify, "Back at the store, with… with Riko-chan."

Oh. Not exactly mortified but not cool either, he's not surprised to feel his face warm from a blush. "Nosy girl. How much did you hear?"

"N-Nosy!? I didn'tI… I'm sorry, it's just you…" Manami trailed off sighing, obviously unsure, but then she continues. "You were right next to my aisle and you were… I could hear you both clearly, so… so… all of it…?"

Damn, Ayasegawa. You ruin my date and my chances, too? Karma huddles into a pillow even though Manami can't see it. It's not that he cared that she heard—they were true, and he was proud of his honesty—but because he knew she was unsure, still. An uncertain person like Manami wasn't receptive to intensity; Karma did not want to scare her off with what he felt. No more running further from him from where she was already meters away. "I'm more surprised you could hear us over your books, Okuda-san."

"I didn't mean to!"

"Fine, have it this way," Karma gives up, gives in. Sighs. He was really awake now. "It's not like you don't know already."

He manages to save little bit of himself at her incoherent stammering. Karma lets her ramble, simply hearing and listening. He could close his eyes and relish the words, but his mind would drift and his attention could stray—worse, he could fall asleep on her! So he remains awake with eyes wide open, ready and alert for conversation even though she could go on for hours on her own. Karma wanted to be awake with her.

"Um, sorry," Manami suddenly stops, murmuring shyly. "I must be keeping you up. Yamamura-kun and Riko-chan are taking a bit too long…"

He knows the topic's changed without being told. So he humors her, treading away from eggshells. "Wanna bet that they're already together by the time they come back?"

"Karma-kun!"

Karma waits her out with a patient smile.

"…Fine, b-but no extreme deals!"

Quarter to 3 am, of course Manami loses to him once Yamamura and Ayasegawa had returned, their hands twined. Privately, Karma could only wonder if he'd like to bet on he and Manami too, but, the stakes are too risky, he thinks, even as she stays up with him, even as they get no sleep talking about everything and nothing, even as they watch the rising sun together but one train ride away from the other.


 

Chapter 4: Four

Chapter Text


So that's how it was.

Karma had taken off the buttons; it was the only explanation to give, given the fact that the cardigan had holes on the other side where the buttons were meant to go. But why would he do that?Manami frowns, smoothing down her skirt, her hair loose and pin-straight in its dampness as she stood in front of the mirror. It seemed like too much effort, even if the cardigan itself was still usable button-less. But still, Manami liked to think. Thinking made sense. So what sense was there to it when he removed the buttons?

Thinking about buttons made her think back to Karma's second button; the one he'd given her all those months ago, the one that she kept in the empty pill box on her desk. Manami glanced at it, cheeks rosy. Of course she knew what that meant now… though, did that button belong to the cardigan she was wearing now? …No, it didn't. It was a bit too small, and would have kept slipping through the button hole. So where did he get it?

The questions just kept coming and Manami's nose scrunched. I should just ask him myself… it's just a question of where he got it, isn't it? Another question. Manami sighed as she bent to retrieve her elastics.

But even then, the scent of the cardigan that had nestled around her wafted to her nose, and even Manami was not so blind to not realize that he'd made her smell like him. You smell like home, he'd said. Did he mean he liked the way he smelled? But that would make no sense, whatsoever. Manami pinched a bit of the black cotton and brought it to her nose, smiling against the cloth. But, it made sense that Karma would like the way he smelled; no one liked to smell bad, and Karma always smelled nice.

What about smelling like home? Ah, he must like the scent of his cologne and fabric conditioner that much to the point he's made her use it; it was the way his house smelled. That must be it! Manami nods, beaming now as she braided her hair, confident she'd figured out the meaning in his words. Ha, she cheered to herself, now I know what you meant, Karma-kun!

There was a knock before her door creaked to admit her mother. Manami looked to find her mother peering at her, sharp gray eyes unreadable as always. Manami directed her cheery grin at her.

"Good morning!"

Okuda Rie crossed her arms, brow rising. "Good morning… breakfast is ready. And why are you wearing such a big smile so early in the morning, dear?"

"Oh, I've just figured out the answer to something."

"Must have been a really interesting one." Her mother said with a shrug, turning away and beckoning her to follow, and follow Manami did.

"It was something like that, yes."

Her father was already on the table with his tea, waiting for them to arrive. To his left sat a number of files and Manami knew they were her reports without looking. He had her file last month's inventory and stocks from the pharmacy last night after all, plus, they were color-coded. She was the only one who color-coded notes and files in their family, and her father always put the blue ones on top of any other color, saving the orange ones for last simply because he hated the color orange.

"Good morning, father."

"Good morning." He didn't even look up from the papers.

Manami took a seat and immediately found fault with the steaming beverage set next to her breakfast. "This is tea."

"I'm glad you know what it's called. Green tea's healthier," her father said as he sent her a stern look she would have believed had the corner of his mouth weren't twitching. "Drink that. You need to cut down on black coffee. Remember, I'm watching your acidity levels, Manami. You stay up late enough studying as it is."

Manami sunk low on her seat, mumbling, "I-I only take black coffee in the mornings…"

Her mother tapped her head with a newspaper as she passed, scoffing. "Studying, so he says. Your daughter is up late because she's being kept out late, Eiichi." She turned to Manami, eyes stern. "Don't get me wrong, dear. I'm grateful you get home at all as late as it is, but please, it would make me feel better if I meet Akabane-kun one day. I'd like a few words."

The vaguely accusing tone paired with her mother's sharp look had Manami averting her eyes as she put bits of omelette to her mouth, cheeks rosy. "Yes, mother." She wondered how Karma would fare against her mother—charm and sweet-talking could only get so far… and Manami knew her mother can be a brick wall if she wanted to. Worry made her frown; I should have gotten him to meet mother sooner…

Her father was chuckling against his cup. "How is Karma-kun, honey? Everything fine with you two?"

"He's okay… um. We're okay." Manami murmured, staring pointedly at her meal.

"Mm-hm," her father hummed, his tone laden with fanfare. "I was under the impression he's your good friend. Have you two broken up already? Oh, no, why? Don't you want him anymore?"

If there was anything she got from Okuda Eiichi, her father, it was surely his talent of barraging questions. Except her father was inquisitive to the point of nosy, and Manami knew her mother was his complement and her saint from the way she could shut him up with simply a look. Her father merely gave her a complacent smile.

"Please stop." Manami pleaded, hiding behind her tea as it fogged her glasses over. It was one thing to have your friends tease and pry; her parents… her father, on the other hand…

He laughed, and even her mother was smiling. "Oh, humor me, child. My birthday is nearing, at least gift me your words." Her father hummed again. "Come to think of it, I'm thinking of taking the day off for that one. It'll be Manami's summer break by then too, won't it?" Manami nods, and his smile brightened. "Then let's all go out for dinner. No work, no school stuff. Just us and dinner somewhere nice."

Dinner with her parents was something short of a luxury; they worked for 12 hours every day, sometimes more. Weekends were no exception—manning the pharmacy required 24/7 service. Though there were other staff and shift rotations, there was no denying her parents were workaholics. "I-I'd like that!"

Her mother titters against her cup. "Oh, alright. It has been a while since we went out. I'll take a leave, too."

They make plans for her father's birthday and swear promises. By the time Manami is walking towards the train station there's a warm ball of happiness within her that she hadn't felt in a long time, smiling beneath her scarf against the sway of early morning passengers and station chatter. For now, there was nothing that would bring her day down.


"…And at the 31st, there's a mixer for you and Sora-chan with some of my old classmates."

Nothing, except Ayasegawa Riko's sudden announcements involving mixers she hadn't agreed to.

"Excuse me?" Daimonji voiced out what Manami couldn't, thick with betrayal and annoyance. Her friend had scrambled up from her seat with such haste that her pack of carrot sticks almost clattered off the desk—Manami zoomed forward to catch it, sighing. Then she looked back at Ayasegawa, frowning. A mixer? Her? Now, she may have gotten her high school friends out of happenstance, sheer power of will and mutual interests, a mixer was a different matter altogether. Doubt and discomfort wound its way around her, displacing the happy ball of warmth that she'd cradled just an hour ago. And the 31st was 3-E's reunion!

Ayasegawa stood in front of them, unshakable, and the fact that her fingers were twined with Yamamura's might have helped her stand firm. Yamamura, however, looked less supportive of her and more sympathetic when Manami found him shaking his head at her, looking put out. Yamamura and Ayasegawa were cloudy skies apart, and rain on sunny days together. Some things don't change, Manami thinks, managing to smile despite the news she just received.

"Riko," Daimonji says, voice low. "Just because you and Kouichi got your stuff together doesn't mean everyone else has to."

"Everyone will have to get it together someday. I'm helping speed up the process for you and Manami-chan."

"I don't have time for mixers," Daimonji insists. Me too, Manami thought, looking up at her and Ayasegawa. "And why involve Okuda-chan when she already has Kunugigaoka-san? And I already have someone I like—"

"Wait, first off, they're not together, so it doesn't count. I like Kunugigaoka-san, I really do, but they're not exclusive as far as I could tell. They're free to see other people!" Ayasegawa relinquished her hold on Yamamura's hand to cross her arms. Ah, why am I caught in this? Manami thinks, fingers picking at the cardigan sleeves, avoiding Ayasegawa's probing stare and pretending she hadn't just torn through her standing with Karma. Sometimes Manami did not like Ayasegawa's assertiveness. It's more than that. Beside her, Yamamura nudges her and Manami shrugs weakly at him. "And… you've never told me you liked somebody before."

Daimonji reddens, but she stood to her full height, bristling. "So now you do. I have someone I like, like how Kunugigaoka-san likes Okuda-chan, so I think it's safe to say we won't be going, thanks."

"You're going, Sora-chan. You and Manami-chan both. And it's just a mixer—you love parties! What's wrong with this one? It's like a mini party!"

Daimonji does not answer, her mouth pursed. A beat of silence as they stared each other down, and Manami suppresses a sigh as she reclined on her chair. They were best friends and they were fighting… Her hands wrung and played with her sleeves again, thinking that if Daimonji couldn't shake Ayasegawa down, there was no way Ayasegawa would listen to Manami. Saying no to Ayasegawa Riko isn't an option.

What would she say to Karma? Could she even say it? Even if she didn't, he'd find out one way or another, or maybe Yamamura and Yotsuki would say. I think it would be better if it came from me. Easier said than done. Manami frets.

"Fine, whatever." Daimonji reluctantly mutters, looking away. "Just this once."

Ayasegawa smiles, pleased. "Once is enough."

"You say that as if one trial is sufficient to yield results." Yamamura drawls. "You're supposed to conduct a lot of tests before coming to a conclusion. You sure you're in the right field?"

"Might I remind you we met on a diner at first year junior high and you fell so hard you transferred the following year?" Manami and Daimonji turned wide eyes to Yamamura, who looked sucker-punched, then blushed to his ears. Ayasegawa looked smug. "So don't tell me about repeating experiments now, Kouichi."

Yamamura scoffed, looking away to hide his burning cheeks. "Sometimes I wonder why I love you."

As Ayasegawa and Yamamura started an entirely new debate, Daimonji settles back down with a sigh and nudged Manami—who inclined her head in askance. "I guess it's true that love has no logical explanation, huh?"

Manami refrained from saying that it did. There was always a logical explanation to everything, though not everyone could make sense of it.

"What would happen if we don't go?" Manami dared ask, her voice low. "I have plans on that day, too…"

"Tough. She'd pester you non-stop until you agree, so you'd best go along on this one." Daimonji sighs. "You don't wanna learn the hard way of saying no to Riko, Okuda-chan."

Manami really, really did not want to go. The idea of meeting people she did not know nor possessed any prior knowledge of made her stomach turn; the fact because it was for a mixer, more so. "I wish Yotsuki-kun were here."

"Believe me, Manato stands no chance against her either."

With that, both of them sighed.


Classes came and went. Manami was ashamed to have been so preoccupied to do her hundred percent. Before she knew it, last period had ended and Manami waved back as Nonoe waved her goodbye. Ayasegawa was in a conversation with three of her classmates by the front and Yamamura was already done with his things and approaching Ayasegawa; Manami quickly rounded her desk and pulled him back before he got too far.

"Okuda, hey," he breathed, surprised. "Need anything?"

"Um, I know this would be really irresponsible of me, a-and I'd like Yamamura-kun to know that under different circumstances I would never ask of this, but, um…" Manami squared her shoulders. "C-Can I have the day off today? I promise I'll make up for it tomorrow!"

Yamamura snorted. "If I had it my way, I would've been forcing day-offs on you whether you liked it or not." At her indignant look, he chuckled and patted her head, smiling. "But sure. Take all the time you need."

Manami beamed. "Thank you! I only need today."

"Should I ask why you want a day-off?" Manami hesitated. Yamamura noticed, and his mouth quirked. "They won't know."

"I'm going to Kunugigaoka." Admitting it was worse than thinking about it. Her face warmed, and her courage to look at Yamamura in the eye dwindled to zero. Manami shrugged; she felt silly. "Um. So there."

"So there." The blandness of his tone is betrayed by his amused eyes. Manami can't help smiling, and Yamamura rolled his eyes as if annoyed. "What the heck are you still here for? You're not putting your day off to good use."

Manami liked Yamamura. Sometimes he reminded her of Isogai, the way he handled their class and the responsibilities that came with being section leader, except Isogai isn't as brusque and aloof. Assured of his loyalty but wanting to be sure, Manami grabbed hold of her bag but looked back at him. "You won't tell Riko-chan or anyone else, right?"

"I would hide a dead body for you, Okuda."

Giggling, Manami all but ran out the classroom, navigating the hall against the crowd of students and past the gates in no time. Out of campus perimeters did she break into a run, ducking into empty sideways and alleys for the shortest way to the station; she couldn't explain the nervous energy and her rush, just feeling the inexplicable need to get to Kunugigaoka and who she wanted to see there.

They're free to see other people.

Of course they were. Manami just couldn't. And wouldn't. Manami didn't understand a lot of things when it came to topics normal to one of her age, but she isn't incompetent; she's getting there. Exclusive or not, there was this strange loyalty to him that she didn't want to endanger. Friendship, companionship, relationship, whatever it is or whatever it isn't didn't matter now—this is what Ayasegawa does not understand.

Just because you and Kouichi got your stuff together doesn't mean everyone else has to.

We can't expect to have all of it figured out that fast, right?

When Manami boards the train, she's surprised to find how little passengers there are compared to her usual train. Calculating the time, the hours and the schedules, this was four trains earlier than her usual one. The one that's supposed to be mine, she thinks with no little amount of awe, but always the one Karma-kun takes, in another station, on another day, for the path to Oku Tokyo. It's Wednesday, and he had judo. Karma liked judo; he never missed practice for the opportunity to 'take down and knock Asano off of his high horse,' even for her.

And that is fine. He was always waiting for her. She could wait for him this time around.


Or so that's what's been said.

But as she stood there by the gates of Kunugigaoka, trying to ignore the curious looks (there's this one girl though, a little ways next to the gates—she was texting and sending looks Manami's way that looked almost surprised) thrown her way, Manami is fretting. What should I say? And how should she say it? She did not think this through. Stupid mixer! She'd let her feelings take over, and she had no strategies. Manami wrung her hands together. Maybe she should just leave, and he hadn't known she would coming anyway. He'd be none the wiser.

Yes, she'd just leave. There was no need to rush; she had more than a few weeks left, and—

"You there." The shock of being addressed made her jump, and Manami took more than two stumbling steps back until someone grabbed her elbow, pulling her back. She looked up into the eyes of none other than former class 3-A's Asano himself; he was frowning as he let her go, but Manami took one step back nonetheless, nonplussed by his appearance. "You've been standing here for a while. What business do you have?"

"Um," Manami swallowed. She had never interacted with Asano so directly before—he'd always spoken to class 3-E as a whole unit, that, or it was Karma. He doesn't recognize me… Which was good. But why is he here? Didn't he have judo practice, like Karma did? He was in uniform, too! "I'm-I'm waiting for someone."

Asano's stare narrowed. "Someone from this school?" His eyes flicked back to the Kunugigaoka gates, then back to her. "Who are you waiting for? Which school do you go to? You look like a freshman—" His eyes lit up with an idea. "Or perhaps you are interested in transferring? We have requirements, of course—"

So much questions! Manami struggled to come up for answers; the Asano she knew as a student of class 3-E did not coincide with this Asano. Maybe it was because he doesn't actually recognize her, and there was no class 3-E anymore to speak of, but nonetheless, it was strange to be alone in his presence. Nothing like the Asano who controlled the school on the chairman's orders. Nothing like the Asano who Karma fans the fire of rivalry with.

"So which is it?" Even his polite smile is disconcerting. Manami hesitantly smiled back.

"Um, I'm really just… waiting for someone."

Another contemplative look stealed over Asano's face. He is… very curious. Manami watched as he seemed to gain another revelation, eyes determined. "Ah, are you confessing to this someone?"

"No!" Manami blurts, blushing furiously. Was that how she looked like? Oh gods. She never expected to hear that sort of thing from Asano himself. It simply… it's weird. Has he always been so nosy?"You got it all—" She's silenced by how Asano put up a hand, another contemplative look to his face and Manami almost grimaces. Another question?

"Wait, you definitely look familiar now." He hums, leaning into her space to study her—Manami leans back as well, blinking rapidly. Was there any need to get in her space just to verify a familiar face? "I've seen you somewhere, just…"

Standing as close as he is she saw how his bright stare stagnated, and how his polite smile fell—just a bit. Did he realize something unpleasant? Manami would never know what ran through Asano's mind that moment. She could wonder, but she would never guess how he realized the reason of her familiarity.

"Ah, you are the Okuda that Koyama could not shut up about." He straightened up and Manami did too. Koyama talked about her? Probably because you beat him in science, a voice that sounded suspiciously like Karma chimed through her thoughts. She did not feel sorry. "From class 3-E. Correct?"

"That's right," Manami bowed a little. "Hello, Asano-san. It's nice meeting you… um, again."

"I wish I could say the same," he sighs, voice droll and unamused, "but I keep being haunted by you people, and it had to be by the worst of the bunch. Let me guess, you are waiting for him? Akabane?"

Out of courtesy, Manami bit back her amusement and simply nods. Asano crossed his arms.

"Practice is almost over, but not for another hour. "

"That is fine, but I do wonder why you're here and not there, Asano-san."

Mauve eyes narrowed. "Huh. You know about club practice, too?"

"Karma-kun tells me stories. Sometimes you are included." Her smile slipped out, and no matter how Asano scoffed and scowled, she couldn't stop it from spreading. "He doesn't like you very much."

"He's not my favorite person either." He sneered, then his expresion smoothed to one of grudging regard. "But he is a worthy opponent."

"Aha, I knew you praise me behind my back!"

Asano turned around so fast that Manami was more surprised by the action than the sudden appearance of Karma himself; he looked wild, his uniform looking ragged (or hastily put on?), with his hair mussed and damp. Arms akimbo, Karma grinned at them, and already Manami could feel one of hers surfacing to her mouth.

"You didn't say anything about missing practice, Asano. Shirking your responsibilities?"

"And you're missing practice, as well. Where do you think you're going?" Asano jibed.

Karma gestured to himself somewhat theatrically. "I think I'd like to mention that unlike someone, my presence actually graced practice today, as I always do." He glanced at Manami, eyebrows rising. "I would like an explanation why the captain missed practice, or I'd have to assume you're harassing Okuda-san."

Asano scowled. "I manage my time well, if that's what you're insinuating!"

"Doesn't look it~"

There's a pause, the seconds of their stare down counted. At the five second mark, Asano clicks his tongue as Karma harrumphs, smirking. Manami keeps her thoughts, watching. It's fascinating to watch Karma and Asano interact up close without the weight of class 3-E and histories to reflect on. This is high school, and while many things have changed, Manami thinks, this remains constant.

"Shoo now, Asano. I'll take over from here." Karma made dismissive motions as he approached her. "Lucky you. If you spent another second here you would have been poisoned."

They share a look, and she smothers the urge to laugh when she reads the mirth in his stare, though—what exactly did he mean? Not the surface one taken at face value; no, the one that simmered and went under and hid behind external cues. She looks at Asano, but he looked just as confused.

"The only poisonous thing here is your presence." He scoffs, turns, and surprises Manami when he gives her a nod. "Good day, Okuda-san."

"L-Likewise, Asano-san," she bows, but he is already walking away before she even finished, and Karma's arm went around her shoulders the moment she straightens. The warmth of his closeness as he pressed her to his side is constant, too.

His question is both teasing and speculative. "Fraternizing with the enemy?"

"No," Manami reddens. "He's… Asano-san is very… chatty. I couldn't keep up. Is he always so curious?"

"Curious?" He snorts. "More like nosy. He was worse last year—total breach of confidentiality, and it's always Korosensei this, Korosensei that. You'd think he wouldn't pry since it was class 3-E, but no. He just had to be Mr. Have-To-Know-It-All."

Manami laughs under his arm, and they start walking; his arm slides off to offer it to her instead. That's new, Manami observes. She takes it anyway. "So, anyway," he starts. "S'not everyday you find yourself back here… don't you have research today?"

"I asked for a leave."

Karma made a surprised noise. "Really? You…" As he trailed off she looked up at him, sees the redness of his ears. She tried not to let one of her own rise, but fails. Somehow, she thinks he meant to finish that with waited for me? And if he did ask maybe she would have said yes. "I mean, you don't usually do that. Why?"

Manami picks at the cloth of his jacket where her fingers rest. How should she say it? Had Asano not come as a distraction she would have pieced together something acceptable as a form of explanation.

She found herself stalling. "B-But how did you know I was here?"

"A classmate told me," Karma waved his phone in the air. "She said you've been waiting here for a while now. Why didn't you just call me? Or… did you want to surprise me?" His teasing grin sent her cheeks ablaze.

No sense in preparations. The words pour out, and they stop walking. "B-Because Riko-chan set me up on a mixer and I wanted to tell you myself before you found out from someone else and—and I never knew about it until this morning, and I can't say no to Riko-chan, no, so I have to go but I really, really don't want to b-but…" She squeezed his arm just as she squeezed her eyes shut. "I'm sorry."

"Why are you apologizing?" He ruffles her hair, knowing she hated it and even then she couldn't muster up her annoyance. Her eyes opened, but they remained downcast. "Hey, come on. Why are you so down? It's just a friendly gathering, no?"

"But… it's a mixer." Manami stressed, finally looking back at him. She couldn't say what Ayasegawa said. They're free to see other people. "And mixers are commonly meant to socialize with people you could be potentially interested in and—"

"—having a good time." Karma interrupts. He looks around, then he tugs her to a shady area for some semblance of privacy, wedged between a closed retail store and a notice board. He keeps her there, unable to escape nor look away, and her mouth is dry. "Okuda-san, didn't we promise to take it slow?"

Manami sighs. "We did." For my sake.

"It's just a mixer, not a date. It's a group of people, not just two." He laughs lightly. "You don't have to worry about me. It's okay. And if you're not comfortable anymore, just call me. When is this anyway?"

"The 31st."

Karma blinks. "The same day as our reunion? How though?"

"I can make it." She looked at him with conviction. "There's no way I'll miss it."

His eyes shine, then soften. "Good. Then no worries then. Double fun for you, with the mixer and all."

"I still feel like it's wrong," Manami mumbles, slanting her gaze to his shoes, her cheeks reddening. "And you don't know what Riko-chan said."

"What did she say?"

Her hands clenched. "That we're free to see other people, and—" Manami swallows, and grabbed his hands in both of hers. "Karma-kun, the truth is I can't. I-I don't know how to explain it, but I can't. It's like… seeing other people for the purpose of companionship, somehow unless it's not you… I don't think I can. I can't. And you know that things like love and all of that, it's not so easy for me—I'm not easy, I know that, but…"

She knew her explanation was pathetic, but his smile remains soft. "I'm still here?"

"Yes." She breathes, and almost jumps when his hand moved in hers to grip back. She looked at it in wonder. "Why are you still here?"

"Same reason as you." He grinned. "I can't. Plus… there aren't a lot who could all of this awesomeness now, can they?"

She hears his unspoken I trust you and suddenly it's all too hard to breathe. Manami swallows the welcome surge of relief that sent her heart racing. "Oh."

"So I guess we're stuck with each other." Karma shrugs, then he pulls her close. Manami leans into him, and almost melts as he loops both arms around her shoulders. He cannot hide behind a cool facade as his heart raced against her ear. "I said it before. It's you or nothing."

"You did."

"Are you getting there?"

"I think so."

"Then I have nothing to worry about." Manami hesitates, then puts her arms around him as well, squeezing. Karma laughs against the crown of her head. "Gosh, this is what I live for. That sounded almost like a confession, Okuda-san."

Manami still hears what he is allowing her to hear. He was jesting, but there is caution. She decided she'd like to hear what she wanted to hear from him. "You can call me Manami, Karma-kun."

He falls silent. Manami lets go to take a look at him, wondering if she'd been too forward again. She was ready to apologize (again), that was until—

"Manami."

Oh. He said it. Her face flamed, her mouth opened, closed, and she nodded, unable to do anything else. The blush just deepened under his warm stare, and she was unable to look at him in the eye any longer. Yet another thing she's unprepared for; the ease of how he says it, and how much she liked it. It's just my name! Get it together!

It's easy, because she does not know how often he is left alone to practice the pauses and rises to her name, each carefully worded syllable, said with utmost care. Ma-na-mi. Manami. She does not know that when he says "Okuda-san" it is Manami in his head, and he couldn't count how much he'd almost slipped up because of this.

She'd never know it, but Karma would let it be. Today, she was finally Manami.

"D-Do you want to go to the okonomiyaki place?" She says slowly, after a sufficient time and stewing her courage together, and Karma's face brightens.

"Of course."


He was looking at her, waiting for answers, but all Manami could think about is how she could remember the last time she's had this sensation. The tightness in her chest, the queasy turning of her stomach and the stormy confusion in her head—the feeling similar to that of 10 years ago, when five year old Manami had been pulled out school by her father because her mother collapsed.

Or, according to her pale-faced father, "Mom's in the hospital because she passed out."

He had desaturated the definition of 'collapsed' to something simpler so her five year old mind could understand. And Manami did understand, and she also understood that her very pregnant mother, collapsing, meant bad things. And so the feelings surfaced, roiling and foreign and invasive, made her grip her father's hand so tightly back; it was the first time little Okuda Manami had felt such intense feelings. At the time, the only word she could associate those feelings with was 'bad,' and that she never wanted to feel it again.

Her parents were simple, too. While her father knew to let her down gently, her mother is blunt to the point of being acerbic and hurtful. But that wasn't her intention; she simply wanted to be direct to the point. So when she's told she wasn't going to be a big sister anymore, Manami just nods, even if she'd wanted to cry.

Manami understood those words, and understood just how powerful words really were if wielded efficiently.

"Oh."

Maybe it's why she did so badly in language arts and literature. In expressing herself. It was easy for her to be simple and direct to the point; why be subtle, why beat around the bush, why be ambiguous? Granted, it took time to yield results (and very contradictory to her nature), but Manami knew every second spent in inactivity is time that could have been used to do something else worthwhile. It was living in a fast world with so little time and so much to do—there was no time for language nuances. It was going all out or nothing.

Then came Korosensei. "To deceive someone, you must know your opponent. You must plan out your words. The power of language is a necessity to skillfully deliver poison." Manami would never forget those words, how they saturated and desaturated in her mind, simple, effective. It was something as simple as that old adage: sticks and stones may break my bones but words can't hurt me—except Manami knew that words can hurt, how they can cut deep and poison the mind with all sorts of harmful ideas. Maybe that was what Korosensei meant—there were words meant to kill, and words meant to save.

A hand brushed her face, and Manami starts. She was no longer looking at the memory of her sharp-eyed mother and smiling ghosts of teachers, but at the golden eyed Karma, whose eyes remain trained on hers even though she's spent a few minutes retreating to a world of her own again. And then in her chest there's a rush of warmth for him, through the mess of her feelings and the urge to flee. Karma was waiting for an answer, waiting for her to come back.

Swallowing her nerves, she pushed back against those invasive feelings that threatened to swallow her whole as her hands refused to settle down and stop shaking. For once, Manami thinks, for once let me do this for Karma-kun's sake! Hands grab hers and trapped them, stilling them. She looked at Karma, committing the patient, encouraging smile on his face to her memory, lets her abnormally fast-paced heartbeat—tachycardia?—take its time to calm. And tries again.

"Karma-kun…" She paused to breathe in deep, then squared her shoulders. It is easy to be simple. Karma deserved simple and honesty and explanation. "I don't know what to feel. And… I don't know what to think. I don't know what I should do, but…"

"But…?"

Manami turns their hands over, moves so it's his hands being held in hers instead. "But, I do know that I don't want to lose you." Ah, a blush spread past to his ears again. "Not at all."

"I can't imagine anyone wanting to lose someone like me either," he airily replies, but there Manami hears something brittle and uncertain.

"I don't want to lose you," Manami affirms softly, almost to herself, "but what should I do so I wouldn't lose Karma-kun?"

It was right to worry about that, wasn't it? Before anything else, Karma is her friend. Her partner in crime, her classmate, her confidant. Though the way she felt for him in light of what he felt for her is blurry to her still, he is all those things—Karma is Karma, he is… Karma simply just is. And the thought of not having Karma with her… His hands tighten in hers, too big to be enveloped in her hands and something inside her pinches in a peculiar way.

I want these hands to be always near enough to hold.

"What we will do is take this slow." He ruffles her hair, grinning gently now. "There's no rush. We have a lot ahead of us, Okuda-san. We can't expect to have all of it figured out that fast, right? We need to think. We need plans and strategies, but we must need to be prepared when the plan is not enough."

Manami's voice shakes. "Why are you so patient with me?"

"Haste makes waste, and it's not good to make half-hearted decisions." He sends her a meaningful smirk. "You know that I don't half-ass anything with you, Okuda-san. And I think you'd want to do the same if you ever feel the same way as I do."

He's seated from a safe distance now, but her heart has yet to completely settle, their hands still clasped. It must be because of that look again, and those kind words. Mercurial eyes that only seem to mellow for her alone.

Manami breathes in again, and nods the words, "W-Well, then, please take care of me," leaving her mouth in a single breath even though at the back of her mind it's what he's been doing all this time.

She could only hope to be able to do the same for him soon.


 

Chapter 5: Five

Chapter Text


The parcel arrived that weekend, held in the hands of a delivery man at 8:33 in the morning right as Karma opened the door to leave. It didn't weigh all that much, the protective boxing small, addressed to him and under that is Akabane Kuniharu, his father, having come all the way from Peru. Sure are going places, aren't you guys?

He tore through the wrapping and blinked at the bundle of cloth and candy pack that lay inside in neatly arranged rows—next to a pack of strange candies another postcard lay tucked featuring the Urubamba River being overlooked atop the Inca Trail of Machu Picchu, and surely enough, his mother's writing dominated the other side of it. This woman, he thought with affection, she should've just written a letter. A container of Peruvian pink salt rolled out from within the bundles, and Karma shook it as he read the postcard.

Dearest Karma,

How are you? Peru is lovely, but this postcard doesn't quite do it justice. We haven't actually been planning to travel here. I've been feeling a little under the weather lately, and you know how much your dad worries, but I think it's just motion sickness. We'll be staying here for a few days, to be sure, so don't worry too much. Do send us an e-mail when you get this package, we miss you a whole lot! Every young man I pass by reminds me of you, and I wonder if you've grown taller again. Maybe you're even taller than dad, now. Try the salt and the Coca candies! I think you'll like them. I'm not so sure about the sweaters, but I'm positive they fit you. We'll be expecting your email!

All our love,

Mom and Dad

In some strange, almost miraculous luck, the two sweaters fit perfectly, though he didn't care much for the green one, preferring the maroon one better even though the green one had a cooler design—besides it would just clash with his hair. The candies aren't half-bad, and Karma liked that it isn't overly sweet nor too bland as he crushed it with his teeth.

But there was a reluctance to his hands, a familiar feeling of detachment as he scrolled past his father's email contact. Maybe it was some form of petulance, maybe he didn't just want to. With a sigh, Karma stood to stash the postcard in its designated drawer in the bureau. Just another postcard among the hundreds that occupied the drawer, all from the Altai Mountains to the African wilderness and it wasn't even half-full still. Karma lost count after the 200th postcard. He still remembered that postcard, though, with its red and gold color scheme with large, obnoxious letters of Cambodia in overly-decorated Christmas font.

It was the only thing they sent for his 14th birthday. They couldn't make it in time because the flights were full, it said. We're so sorry, honey. Happy birthday and Merry Christmas, and then, we love you. They did come home on the first week of February before leaving again just a week after. Karma wondered why he still bothered keeping the postcards when he wasn't even sure how many were there now. He wondered why he hadn't burned them up; he wondered why he still bothered reading them in the first place. And he didn't always reply, either.

He caught a glimpse of himself in the mirror as he passed, backtracked, and then stopped. Karma frowned and ran a hand through his fringe; definitely longer than he remembered, and it was starting to tickle the back of his neck, too. Hands braced against the bureau, Karma stared hard at his reflection.

This was the face of his father, and he had his mother's eyes.

Mom used to always say, "What a handsome face, soon you'll be looking like your dad when you're all grown up!" And this was done while she still had the time to dote and fuss, before all the money and the traveling and the stupid postcards. This was the face of his dad, and… If I just do this…

He hadn't realized he'd moved until he was staring at his father's general appearance—hair pushed back, parted to the side. Karma's work was clumsy, with several strands rogue and messy, but whoa that's his dad right there and I look just like him. Scoffing and furiously tousling his hair, Karma glared at his reflection.

"Stupid," he huffs, you miss them. That fact never changed. He kept those postcards because they had been pressed to his parents' hands all the way from where they'd sent it from, a tiny thought that though they're walking along the crowded streets of China to admiring the ruins of Parthenon he was also reliving what they had been experiencing.

He had learned to stay the restlessness in his heart but it never left in the wake of his parents' departures; a perennial second thought at the back of his mind. He wanted to get out of here—this large empty house, maybe even the country. Wanted to follow them, stepping on the imprints of their footsteps that paved the way to their own version of the world where Sydney was here and Tokyo was there. He wanted to get out. He wantedHow selfish, he thinks, abandoning the mirror to flop back on the couch, studying the ceiling with little interest.

The silence is ever-deafening, the house cold.

Sighing softly through his teeth, he dug through his pockets for his phone and dialed. For the few seconds it rang, Karma pretended to count the cracks he couldn't see on the ceiling.

The call picked up, and then came the curious, "Karma?"

"Hey, let's hang."

"Now?" There was a sound of cutlery against a plate and a woman's voice he faintly recognized to be Mrs. Shiota asking who was on the phone. "It's just Karma, mom."

"'Just Karma?' Wow, my worth, man. I can feel it dwindling to an all-time low. Attitude!"

Nagisa scoffs. "And your sarcasm is rejuvenating. Can you give me 10 minutes?"

"Sure, but you sure you wanna hang with me? I might mean I wanna hang you."

"Hang me then I'll haunt you."

"Ah, ghosts do scare me, and my hair is green. It'll pain me to have you exorcised." Karma snorts. "Let's play Survival."

Nagisa hums. Karma knows he's already accepted. "Only if its melee."

"Melee or not, I always beat you."

"That's not always true." The rebuttal doesn't completely come out of nowhere, but even through the phone Karma knows Nagisa hadn't meant for it to come out that way, because there's an awkward pause and a slight stammer to his next words. "Erm, I mean…"

"Don't." High school is supposed to be clean slate, and Karma laughs under his breath. "You can stop stuttering like a shoujo manga character during a love confession."

And just like that indignation is back to Nagisa's voice and Karma could already feel the swirl of welcome relief blossom in his chest at the thought of locking back that can of worms. "Hey! Did you have to compare it like that? Sorry for being sensitive!"

"S'not a big deal, so chill." Karma looked up at the ceiling and then out the window, all idle thoughts. "Oho, that rhymed."

"Alright, alright. Where do we meet up?"


Nagisa's 10 minutes stretch to an extra 20 minutes, and Karma minds very much because those 20 minutes of his time that could have been used to distract him from anything but the thought of his big empty house and how he succeeded at leaving it for the time being, but eventually having to go back to it later because where else would he go back to?

He didn't want to call it home.

The playground near Nagisa's place is empty, which surprised him a little. It's a weekend. Kids with their mobile phones and tablets and pasty little faces, he thought with no real conviction and a heavy dose of irony as he scrolled through his phone, pushing himself on the swing with little vigor. Damn it, Nagisa, he groused as he stomped on a leaf that found itself blown to him, then paused.

At that moment, Karma felt a lot like that stupid leaf.

He knew what he needs to become; he'd laid it all to Korosensei during career counseling: plans for the government, the elbows he needed to grease so he could work his way up the ladder of power, the second knife he knew that still needs polishing. But while he knew what he needed to be for the benefit of many others, Karma still had many wants: wants to do, wants to be, wants to have; wants that reared for the pursuit of self-interest.

The boot of indecision is heavy; the future objective and structured, but still uncertain.

Would he remain crushed underneath it? Would he be able to escape it, be blown back to a directionless drifting of where life would fancy taking him to? There's one thing though: Karma will not wither, and there's no breaking that's gonna happen… except if it's to crush someone's bones. There's the idea of needing to staying put for a long-term goal versus staying because you didn't know what you wanted.

Karma picked up the leaf, wiped off dust and dirt from its surface with a careful sort of attentiveness. This is what Nagisa arrives to.

"What are you doing?" Nagisa questions, as he took the empty swing to Karma's right.

Karma barely looked at him. "What do you think of when you see this leaf?"

"Erm, it fell from its tree?" Nagisa took a closer look, then at the surroundings. "Oh, it's from a magnolia tree… you know, usually, it's the flowers we look at."

"The finer details are what completes the bigger picture. And besides, spring is over. No flowers today."

"That's true, but why are you asking?"

Karma hummed. "This leaf is drifting and directionless, now that it fell away from its tree. Where would it go? What would happen to it? One day it would wither and die even if it's fresh now, but with no real purpose anymore. I'm not sure how many times this leaf has been stepped on, but whether it's never been stepped on or not, it can't really give off oxygen anymore. It exists now purely as biodegradable material, gathered for composting, or if it's unlucky enough, it would just dry up and break to pieces without being collected for its only remaining purpose."

"What then?" Karma knew Nagisa had no way of seeing through his head, but he knows Nagisa had always been thoughtful and intuitive. It's not that he knew what Karma means, but he understands what Karma wants to mean through the curve lines and riddles.

And for this reason he wants to be straight lines even just for a little, because Nagisa was his friend and he gets a feel of his thoughts even though Karma always doesn't. "I'm saying I feel like this leaf. I can't help thinking I'm just drifting, even though I know what I need to do. I stepped on this leaf a few moments ago, and thought that if my foot was what kept it there, then it's indecision that's keeping me under. I know what I need to be."

He looked at Nagisa, frowning now. "But I also know what I want to be. And I want to have both."

Nagisa watched Karma look away and turn the leaf over and over in his hands, before he stowed it into the breast pocket of his shirt, turned and looked at him again. In that time, Karma also took note of how Nagisa's hair grew, too. He still kept it in pigtails, just a little longer now. He wondered if Nagisa will cut it, too.

"You could have been an assassin if you wanted." Karma paused. "No… all of us could have been assassins, and… none of us pursued it. Sometimes I think about why's that."

Nagisa swung on his seat for a few seconds. Then he looked up. "We're already assassins, just… I don't know, but all of us could have been better."

But out of all of them, Nagisa was—is—the best assassin. It remains a truth that's still hard to swallow. "So why didn't you?"

"Just because you're the best at something doesn't mean it's your calling, Karma." Nagisa smiled. "It wouldn't have been fulfilling, doing something only because you were the best at it but not because you were happy doing it."

"Wouldn't it have gone down that path anyway?"

"Not for me," Nagisa sighed, pitching forward so his seat could swing. "Korosensei contributed a lot to what I want to be, and that shaped what I need to be. Killing him was… it hurt, and in some way, you know… it helped me realize that underneath all the assassination thing, we were still just normal students who lost a teacher."

Karma swung on his seat, out of sync. "Assassination took up a large space in our lives, even if it was just for a year."

"But before that we had a life beyond it. Before class 3-E and Korosensei we've always been just normal students. Or as normal as you can be in Kunugigaoka." Nagisa stopped swinging, and laughed. "And we're still normal kids, even after that crazy year together. It's over but it doesn't mean we have to turn our backs to it."

Without warning, Karma kicked up the dirt beneath and used that as an opportunity to throw himself out of the swing, flinging a rather sharp rock at Nagisa—his senses detected movement, and as the dust cleared Nagisa stood at the other side of the swing set, rock in hand with a baffled expression. "So I see, you're keeping it up too."

"Of course. Maybe it'll do us well someday." Nagisa's smile is wry as he tossed the rock away. "Or did you just need a reason to show off?"

"Me? Show off? Never."

They settle back down, and the swings move in harmony. "I know I can be good assassin," Nagisa begins. "But don't you think the world has more than enough destroyers? Maybe it's time for more creators."

Karma blinked, and then scoffed his amusement. "But creation could also create destruction, and destruction can breed new creations."

"Maybe, maybe." Nagisa shrugged, smiling now. "It's all just two sides of a coin, a double-edged knife. It's just up to us on how to use it. And Karma?"

"What?"

"I know wanting to be a teacher seems a little lackluster compared to being an assassin, but it's the thought of inspiring the students I'd have, the guidance I could give the way Korosensei had guided us." Nagisa's breath hitched, and Karma observed him at the corner of his eye. "I… I want to create something like thatThat's what makes me happy."

What makes you happy? Went unsaid. Happiness for his parents meant wealth and the travels that come with it. Always moving about, never in one place too long in their hunger for adventure. They'd never said it, but he knows they were happy doing it, even if it meant not coming home for long periods of time—sometimes Karma thinks home for them is but a starting point in a video game, like the village you start in but the one you'd eventually leave in pursuit to greater things.

Then he thinks of Manami, who continues to do what makes her happy and what she's best in. In fact, he's pretty sure she's got that road figured out already. If he wasn't mistaken with her parents' occupations as pharmacists she could even help them out and work alongside them. Karma didn't have that kind of complementary relationship with his parents but he wanted to do what they were doing, too. It clashed with what he needs to be. What else makes me happy? Manami's face remained at the forefront of his mind, but his heart stuttered at the change that transpired yesterday. She was so small in his arms it still throws him sometimes; makes him want to shelter her, keep her safe. Killing for her is nothing short of ordinary—he'd die for her, for everyone in class 3-E, but the gravity of what he wanted included only her.

But she's not some breakable, fragile thing. He is not meant to possess her, as she is not meant to complete him. They could complement each other, be the right fit together, but they're still whole on their own. Yes, she makes me happy, but while I would like to be by her side, the possibility of having to be apart for our individual goals still exists… When it all comes down to it, we'd both hate holding each other back.

Inevitable, but acceptable. He didn't like it, but he could live with it.

"Hey, you okay?" Nagisa questioned, breaking his thoughts, and Karma breathed in, breathed deep, and released.

"Nagisa, I don't thank you very often." Nagisa made a surprised noise. When Karma looked at him and presented a fist, Nagisa just looked even more dumbfounded. "So, thanks. For hearing me out. …You make a good best friend."

The confusion dissolved on Nagisa's face, and he smiled warmly back as he fist-bumped Karma. "No problem."


It's after countless duo game missions with Nagisa and a few minutes to midnight when he gets backs home.

Standing in front of the bureau mirror again, Karma sets to work.

It takes him a while to get it looking just right, but when he pats all the rogue strands of hair and leans back to study himself, Karma finds he liked it. He doesn't mind the work he put in. He doesn't mind looking into his father's face and his mother's eyes, knowing he had ambitions of his own and knowing it'll take a while before he could achieve all those and more.

He doesn't mind thinking: I will have everything, just not all at once, either.


 

Chapter 6: Six

Chapter Text


All too soon than she would've liked, the day of the mixer and the reunion arrived, and Manami is a little more than anxious than she's letting on as Ayasegawa and Yotsuki kept an equally as reluctant Daimonji captive up in front. Ayasegawa insisted on them accompanying the two of them to the mixer after she and Daimonji had tried a collective effort of escaping after class. Ayasegawa hadn't been impressed; Yotsuki thought the whole thing was amusing and Yamamura simply didn't care.

"Nervous?" He asked her, matching his pace with hers. She and Yamamura had trailed behind, the silence to the trio's rambunctious. While Yamamura didn't care for the mixer, he had an explicit instruction to make sure she didn't get away either. Ayasegawa's bizarrely-designed knapsack swung against his back from its place on his shoulder, a funny addition to the image of cool indifference he presented.

Manami shrugged. She can play it cool, too. "I'm not a big fan of mixers."

"I promise they're decent. Some of them are our junior high school friends too."

"I'm sure they're nice," Manami mumbles, fidgeting with her cardigan sleeves restlessly. "I'm worried about… um, well, I think…"

"Is it about Kunugigaoka-san?"

"No." Why is it so hard to admit that she was embarrassed to think about not being able to contribute and keep up with the conversation, of how out of depth she would be when it came to topics she could care less about, the possible hit and misses of conflicting interests? Maybe it was pride, but she just didn't want to admit it. "…Never mind."

"Whatever you say to me won't reach Riko," Yamamura assured, voice cool but kind, "or any of those three if that's what you're worried about."

"It's—it's really fine."

"Okuda, I won't ask again."

"Alright, then please don't." Yamamura gave her a dirty look, and Manami ducked from the hand that swiped at her aiming to ruffle her hair. "You don't have to worry about me so much, Yamamura-kun! I'm just a bit nervous." More like a lot. But he didn't need to know that.

Yamamura's unconvinced, but he didn't press. "Fine, I'll pretend to believe you if it'll make you feel better."

"Thank you, it really does, actually."

A few more paces up ahead, their friends finally stopped in front of a fast food diner. Yotsuki proceeded to chat up another high school student that came out. Off to the side, Daimonji stood with her arms crossed and her body language stiff; Ayasegawa was waiting for the two of them to join them, arms akimbo.

"Why are you both so slow?" She griped. "Kouichi, you weren't trying to help Manami-chan escape, were you?"

"If I was, we would've been on the train home by now."

Any retort that Ayasegawa would've contested got cut off by Yotsuki clapping his hands to get their attention. The girl he was talking to had already went back into the diner. "Okuda-chan, Sorano-san, come here for a sec."

Manami caught the way Daimonji purposefully ignored Ayasegawa as she passed by and how Ayasegawa's mouth pursed, hurt but determined at the same time. Yamamura must have seen it too with how quickly he gravitated to her side. Go, his eyes told her, and unable to do anything but smile reassuringly at Ayasegawa's pouting look, Manami allowed Yotsuki to marshal her near the doors of the fast food place.

"Alright, a few words of advice that might sound cliché, but nevertheless true: be yourself, just go with the flow, and have fun! I'm sure you both know that Ayasegawa and I are friends with some of them, so rest assured there'll be no shady stuff going around."

"I don't have to like it, right?" Was Daimonji's frosty reply.

"Naw, don't be like that! Do it for Okuda-chan!"

"She doesn't like it either, do you?"

Manami floundered. Yotsuki simply laughed at her. "Alright, anyway. A quick heads up: there's Akagi, the girl I was talking to earlier. She goes to Seikei with a Kida-san, and there's Shimizu-san and his friend Takase-san, from Haniwa. You with me so far?"

"Akagi-san, Kida-san, Shimizu-san, and Takase-san." Manami recited back. "Right?"

"Now… oh! One of my best friend's there, too, Hiro! He goes to Bunkoku. I think he brought someone named Kirisato with him. That makes… four guys, four gals, including the two of you."

Daimonji snubbed him. Manami hurried to compensate. "I-Is there anything else, Yotsuki-kun?"

"Actually, uh, don't take Hiro too seriously, yeah? He's a bit of a flirt, but he's a good guy. Call us when you're done, m'kay? Enjoy, and good luck!"

With a wide smile, he dashed off after the rest of their friends, leaving her and Daimonji to hover near the doors. From the window, a few tables down, Manami could see a large booth occupied by six other students. She and Daimonji were meant for that booth, and they met each other's eyes with a feeling of mutual helplessness.

"We can still run," Daimonji hissed, arm linked through hers.

Manami won't mention how she can still see their "chaperones" lingering by the nearby convenience store with watchful eyes, ready to intervene.

"We're already here… why don't we just eat?" Never mind that she'd be stuffed full later at Muramatsu's restaurant at the reunion. That thought alone was her only consolation for going through today's quandary.

Still, they linger by the doors as Manami tried to make out their company's appearances. And though their backs were turned, with that conspicuous bright hair… one of them looked familiar somehow…

Daimonji made an unhappy sound. "Fine, whatever. I'll just get a milkshake or something less gross."

With that, into the diner they went, no less sure but having no choice for that matter. Even if her heart was skipping, her palms cold and nerves knotting in her stomach, Manami soldiered on with her steps firm. Daimonji marched along with her. This can't be that bad. Daimonji did not want this as much as she didn't, but she's here nonetheless. Daimonji was a precious comrade.

As the two of them approached, one of the girls looked up, and her face lit up. "Oh, guys look, they're here! Hi!"

And with that, all the occupants turned to greet them, the familiar person included, and Manami's surprise was as great as he shot up, eyes wide.

"Okuda-san!?"

Of all people to meet again, Manami was not expecting Maehara Hiroto, and through a mixer, nonetheless.


Maehara was Yotsuki's "Hiro."

They've met through mixers themselves during junior high as well, becoming fast friends with their mutual interest in a wide variety of things. They didn't get together often, but they've kept correspondence online and attended each other's school festivals as much as they could.

It struck Manami that she and Yotsuki could have met by chance when Maehara told her Yotsuki attended their school festival from last year. What a small world! Also somewhat surprising were Akagi and Kida, who went to Seikei— Kayano's high school; the other school that Karma had talked her out of going, because he'd said the commute was tedious, because Oku Tokyo, aside from being perfect for her, was the practical choice between the two. The memory made her smile. The two girls belonged to different classes though, and none of them shared classes with Kayano.

With their familiarity to each other and Maehara's easy rapport with the others in their group, Manami never noticed how her worries about not being able to catch up with the others have disappeared until she was laughing along to one of their jokes. Though still quite far from being a social butterfly, she wasn't stuck in awkward silence like she'd expected. And from there, she and Maehara also went from "Okuda-san" and "Maehara-san" to "Okuda" and "Maehara-kun."

"So, hey, I'm not being a jerk or anything, but I'm still just really surprised you're here." Maehara says after Kida asked about the November science fair. "You never really struck me as the mixer type."

"That's true, but it would've been rude to decline after Riko-chan went through all this trouble for me and Daimonji-san. I'm very glad we met each other again though."

Maehara's grin was blinding. "Same! Feels like I got to know you a little bit. I already thought you were kind of cool back then, to be honest. You just aren't my type, though. Sorry!"

How straightforward. Manami waved off his playful admission with a grin of her own. "Maehara-kun, our class reunion today was your idea, isn't it?"

"Oh!" Maehara perked. "It's not really my idea. Hina—uh, O-Okano and I were kinda talking, and Nakamura somehow got wind of it, and then she went all crazy about it. It's all hers, in a way."

"Karma-kun also said we're planning it to be annual thing, right?"

"I guess so, and I'm not complaining. Besides, I think we kinda need it too, don't we?" Maehara hummed contemplatively, swiping up some of his fries. "Karma, huh? Nice to know you guys still keep in touch, too!"

Amidst scattered conversations and bursts of laughter in the group, Manami's heart swelled. Looks like I was worried for nothing. It was almost fun being here. She even found some sort of kinship with Kida, who was also hoping to make Sakuba for university. Shimizu was just as reserved as her, but he fascinated (and maybe even intimidated her a little) her with his many ear piercings, which he somehow found ways to wear in school. Kirisato, Akagi, and Takase (and Maehara, too, when he wasn't speaking to her), were the ones that kept a constant stream of chatter. Daimonji…

Daimonji looked uncomfortable, but otherwise fine. She was flanked by Takase and Kirisato on either side, and to Manami's eyes, they looked somewhat interested. …No, very interested, if the way their attention always seemed to gravitate back to Daimonji. Manami willed her to meet her eyes, and when she did, she hoped the upward quirk of Daimonji's brow meant she understood the silent question. Are you okay?

It was only when Kirisato excused himself to the bathroom and Daimonji had room that Manami's phone vibrated with her answer. Can't stand these annoying pretty boys!୧((#Φ益Φ#))୨the text read.

They're not being indecent to you are they  (・・ ) ?  I'm sorry we're not seated together with Maehara-kun!  〣( ºΔº )〣 (。╯︵╰。)

Well they're not shady & stuff if that's what you mean, so I guess they're okay. Just really irritating! How about you? Your friend good?

Yes~ Maehara-kun said you're cute ahaha  ( ̄▽ ̄*)ゞ

Ah, a slick guy. Not my type! Manami and Daimonji shared a secret laugh together. No offense meant (づ◡﹏◡)づ Shimuzu-kun's the coolest-looking one, don't you agree? Cool piercings~~ ଘ(੭ˊ꒳ ˋ)੭✧

Kirisato returned then, and then their little group bounced from one plan to another on where to go and what to do next. Maehara had steadfastly reminded them that he and Manami couldn't join because of the time constraints of their class reunion, but that didn't stop him from suggesting ideas either way. In the end, they all decided on karaoke, and what's left of the group insisted on seeing off Manami and Maehara to the nearby bus stop.

Daimonji pulled her aside for a moment. "You enjoy your reunion, okay?" Then, in shyer tones: "And thanks for attending this thing with me. You made it bearable."

"It wasn't so bad after all, huh?"

Daimonji rolled her eyes, but she was smiling. "Coy is not a cute look on you, Okuda-chan. Kunugigaoka-san's rubbing off on you." Manami simpered, and her friend shook her head in amusement. "And yes, I'll apologize to Riko. Tomorrow. Just worry about your reunion now. Take care, okay?"

"Of course! Please take care, too!

As the bus arrived, the group hurried to exchange contact information, bade happy farewells, and made promises of 'next times.' Maehara gave her the window seat just so she could wave a final goodbye to Daimonji, who was flashing them a peace sign. The bus moved, and Manami saw her link arms with Kida and Akagi as they walked away.

"So, thoughts?" Maehara spoke up as she shifted in her seat, and when she hummed questioningly, he clarified: "How's your first mixer experience?"

Manami's smile was humble. "Well, to be honest, I didn't really think I'd enjoy it at first."

"Oh? So what about now? Any change of heart?"

"I enjoyed it," and she meant it. "Maybe it's also because you and Daimonji-san were there, but I had a nice time." She paused to smile sheepishly. "Though I'm not really sure I'd want to do it again."

"It's the experience that counts, no?" he replied with an affable air, presenting her with a fist. Manami shyly bumped it with hers. "You are hereby officially a full-pledged high school girl. Congratulations, Okuda Manami-san!"

Other patrons gave them chastising looks for their loud conversation so she had to shush him, giggling to herself. The rest of the 15-minute bus ride was spent talking about their former classmates and trying to learn Survival on Maehara's phone at his insistence—Karma made the game sound so easy before when he was prattling about the ultra-smooth gameplay but it was anything but, especially while inside a moving vehicle.

She also wondered why Okano texted him to "keep his hands to himself later." Manami had the front-seat experience of witnessing the normally unflappable Maehara turn flustered when the notification banner flashed on the screen.


At their stop, Maehara was comfortable enough to trash talk her non-existent gaming skills ("Only four left and you died because of the green zone? And with only one kill? Man, Okuda. You're a noob!") and Manami was comfortable enough to intentionally patronize him ("Second place is still a good rank, Maehara-kun.").

From there it was only a short walk to their destination, and then they're assuaged with the warm smells of broth and noodles as they finally made their way into Muramatsu's restaurant. Greeting the two of them even louder was their old classmates' exclamations and welcome hugs and touches. With an inside grin, Maehara and Manami separated and were then pulled into their respective circles for catching up and more.

Manami likes how the mixer's outcome turned out, but this… She can't deny that this comfort and familiarity is what she really wanted. It is a camaraderie and belongingness unique only to them, their assassination classroom. There is no need to feel awkward nor out of place here—funnily enough, they all found a shared niche in the face of being out of place together. A classroom in the mountains. A man-made Mach 20 being for a teacher. Knives and guns alongside pens and paper. Battle tactics incorporated into class discussions that would amount to life lessons. How odd and wonderful it was to really belong.

Manami still finds herself glancing around anyway, looking for something. Someone, because it all still feels a little incomplete. Somebody else finds her instead.

"Okuda-san."

"Nagisa-kun, hi!" His knowing look made her smile sheepishly. She was alone at her seat at the moment, with Kayano at the counter and Kanzaki getting drinks for the three of them. "Long time no see! How are you?"

Nagisa's grin is wry as he returned the sentiments. "Long time, Okuda-san. I'm good, actually. I would ask how you are, but to be honest, Karma talks about you so often, I'd be surprised if there isn't something I don't know."

"Ah." Manami doesn't bother hiding her embarrassment. Nagisa's shrewd eyes saw through everything. "We talk about you, too. Sometimes."

"I'll bet," he scoffed. "I hope he hasn't completely ruined my image to you."

"No, no! In fact, Karma-kun doesn't trash talk you about Survival that much anymore."

"Does he now? Keep this a secret, Okuda-san, but my back hurts trying to carry him on missions." Nagisa shared a laugh with her. "Do you play, too? You should join us sometime."

"Oh no, I'm not very good at it. I tried it with Maehara-kun earlier, though."

Nagisa eyed her with confusion. "Maehara? That's an unusual crowd you're with, Okuda-san. N-Not in a bad way! I mean, I'm just surprised, is all."

"Where've you been, man!?" Okajima joined them at the table, collapsing heavily next to Nagisa with a sigh. "Haven't you heard? Okuda-san here and Maehara went to a mixer together! He was just telling us about it."

"A mixer, huh? That's kinda cool. Small world!"

Okajima turned his attention to her. "Well, I heard from Maehara, but how've you been, Okuda-san? Long time no see!"

"I've been well, Okajima-san! I heard about your portrait exhibition for next year, congratulations! Will it be open to the general public?

"Ah, you humble me, milady. Thank you." Okajima bowed to her with a bright smile. It was indeed a very big deal for him. "Everyone from 3-E is invited, of course. It's kinda private, but I'll make sure to reserve ticket slots for all of you when things get set up. I also got Ritsu to help with the technicalities, and she'll send out the RVSP for you guys when the time comes."

"Sign me up if you're still looking for models, Okajima-kun!" Came Kurahashi's chime as she ran past behind, chased by an irate-looking Kimura while Isogai followed close behind, trying to settle them down.

With fire in his eyes, Okajima slammed his fist and declared, "Nude portraits it is!"

Manami hedged away and closer to Nagisa for that, but she hid her laughter when Okajima got a very accurately-thrown chopstick to the forehead by Chiba when he made the mistake of asking Hayami to be his nude model.

Kanzaki had mysteriously returned to their table the moment Okajima had darted away to terrorize Yada next. Kayano soon joined them again, too, her face beet red and unable to meet Nagisa's eyes as they spoke. Voices and conversations overlapped over snacks and food, occasionally punctuated with friendly brawls and loud disagreements over this and that. At some point, Nakamura had proposed an arm wrestling challenge between boys and girls, and Manami had lost too fast against Mimura, but she won surprisingly against Sugaya.

"Can't risk injuring my artist's hand," he had gently reasoned amidst the heckling that he went easy on her; in Manami's opinion, it was a roundabout way of saying he did. Sugaya flashed a peace sign at her slight pout.

"Excuses!" Barreling her way forward, Fuwa took her seat and fastened her hand around Sugaya's, who looked horrified. He was trying to escape, but not on her watch! Something important was at stake here! "Don't mind, Okuda-chan. I'll get revenge on Sai here for you!"

"F-Fuwa-san, please be caref—ah, hey!"

"Sai-who now?"

"I believe she's talking about that artistic ninja from that popular manga, Naru—"

"Oi Fuwa, it was supposed to be my turn."

"If you lose," Ignoring Hazama's annoyed and darkening aura, Fuwa leaned into Sugaya's space, eyes shining, "You're going to have to go to Natsukomi with me. Think of it as your favor from me repaid!"

Maehara gasped dramatically. "A mysterious favor! Are you asking Sugaya on a date!?" More jeers and excited talk befell them as Sugaya blushed a deep red, which didn't help matters. "Oh my god look at him!"

"Maehara-san!"

"Huh? Well if that's the case, wanna go out with me Sugaya?" Fuwa was completely unaware of the chaos her words transpired. Okajima was most notably frothing at the mouth at the back. "I'll be your muse if you'll be my illustrator! Not editor though, 'cause one should always keep work and personal life separate. Right?"

"I thought this was an arm wrestling contest…"

"Come on Sugaya-kun! Parlay already!"

Sugaya scowled, straightening up on his seat as their classmates ooh-ed and aah-ed at his resolve. "Very well, Fuwa-san." Cheers exploded and Fuwa grinned competitively at him. "Natsukomi it is for us if you win. But if you lose, you can't commission BL from me ever again!" He blurted, flushed all the way down to his neck.

"I accept your terms!"

"Are you idiots done flirting?" Kimura groused, having been appointed as the referee. Laughter broke out, and especially so when Fuwa scandalously got flustered, too. Sugaya just sighed out loud, praying for patience. "On three, you disgusting lovebirds!"

Fuwa ended up winning two out of three, despite Sugaya's valiant efforts. Manami teased him by semi-faking having taken offense that he went easy on her (she still had her pride, you know!), but she wasn't counting on Sugaya all but kowtowing, much to her embarrassment.

"Who's next!?"

"Heh? We step out for a few minutes and you're all having this much fun without us already? Boo!" The voice is not loud, but it carried all the way to where she was because she knew this voice very well. Manami whipped her head to the doors, but Karma's eyes were already on her.

She didn't know what to do with the inexplicable giddiness and warmth that suffused her upon registering Karma's presence, but all Manami knew was something inside her just said, oh, there he is, and the very air suddenly felt easier to breathe. Her attention snared, she missed the significant look that her table mates shared as Karma, Itona, and Yoshida hustled inside, all three looking ragged.

"Thanks, guys!" Muramatsu's father hollered from the counter. "Free ramen for you three for taking care of the trouble!"

Terasaka whooped, "Sweet! Thanks pops!"

Manami rounded on Kayano. "Trouble? Did something happen?"

"Some guys from Itona-kun's school followed him here to pick a fight before you and Maehara-kun arrived," Kayano supplied, looking over the three as well. "Luckily no one got hurt before Karma-kun and Terasaka pulled them out!"

Manami made a concerned noise just as a shadow loomed over them.

"Scooch, Kayano-chan," Karma drawled, smile in place. "That's my seat."

"But it's my seat now. You can sit right over there." Kayano crossed her arms, defiantly staring up at him. She was mischievous, but Karma is mischief-incarnate; he had more, and he'd have none of hers. Karma hauled her over his shoulder like a sack of produce smirking at Kayano's screeching. "Karma! Put me down!"

"Delivery!"

"Let me take that for 'ya," Nakamura sidled in, laughing at Kayano's irritated growl as she easily picked Kayano up. "Look how light you are, Kayano-chan! Like a stuffed toy!"

Karma sank down on the vacated cushion, grinning evilly at Kayano's dirty looks from Nakamura's arms. "Watch your back, Karma-kun." She threatened, and Karma snorted, giving her a mock salute.

"Watch yours too, Kayano-chan. But I don't know how you'll manage having two backs."

Before Kayano exploded from that very inappropriate comment, Nakamura ran off with her to the other end of the long table where Fuwa and a few other girls were sitting. Nagisa and Kanzaki conveniently vanished; now it's as if only she and Karma were the only people present, and his greeting touch on her fingers below the table only further narrowed her focus on them.

And there's a funny smile on Karma's face as he says, "Hey," that turns almost shy when his pinky slides around hers.

Manami eyed him, wonders at the strange stirring in her chest, and links her pinky more firmly around his. That felt right. She remembers the two of them from a few days ago, heard him say "Manami," her name. That felt right, too. Today, before she'd even realized it, things felt like they fell into place when she'd finally seen him. Now, they were holding hands underneath a table, and it feels right. What if we get caught?

The stray thought in her head that said So what? Sounded a painful lot like Karma.

"What, I get this," he tugged on her finger to emphasize his point, "but no 'Hello,' Okuda-san?" He teased, her surname pitched low as if it were an inside joke.

Manami tried to bite down her burgeoning smile. "Hi."

"How was your mixer?"

"It was good. Um… I met Maehara-kun my mixer, surprisingly. He and Yotsuki-kun were already long-time friends."

"So I've heard." They quieted when Muramatsu came trotting over with his ramen, and Karma hid their entwined fingers beneath his thigh when the ramen was set down. Muramatsu was fortunately too focused on getting everyone else's meals to notice. "Had fun?"

She smiled brightly at him. "I have lots to tell you, but it wasn't as bad as I first thought. I like them!"

"Oh? More than you like me?"

Manami blushed beet red at the force of his smirk, but for once, she dared. "I thought I already told Karma-kun that he's my favorite partner in crime." She stole a glance at his stunned expression. They're both blushing, and they probably look like fools. "I guess you forgot."

Karma squeezed her finger, his smirk tinged with awe and resignation. "Maybe a little. Can you remind me again?"

At the back of her mind, she'd always been aware that something had changed between them ever since that day. She's blushing to her roots, maybe even a little mortified, but she felt giddy to be the focus of his attention. She liked his attention, she realized now, and she's horribly poor at it, but this is flirting. And she didn't mind, just as long as it was him. Just him, Karma. Manami swallowed, allowing him to capture her ring finger as his smirk gentled, more like a smile now. She liked his smile, too.

"You're—"

"What the hell?"

Their whispered conversation immediately stopped when Okajima cried out from somewhere behind them, and they both flinched back from each other—whoa, when had they gotten so close? Of all people to notice, it had to be Okajima? Heart racing wildly, she tried to tug her fingers free and glanced at Karma, but despite the scare, he was as composed as he could be as looked at her, only taking her whole hand in his.

"What's this? Okano-san and Maehara!?" Okajima was hollering, passing them by. Loud murmurs followed him as their classmates crowded around Okajima's discovery. Karma tugged her along to follow, but they stood together still just a little off-ways from the gathering, their hands locked behind their backs. In the center of where they've all gathered together, Maehara and Okano were doing the same thing they were—caught red-handed and the center of attention. "Is this for real!?"

"Good job on chaining down the resident Casanova, Okano-san!"

"You went to a mixer without your girlfriend? Man that's shady as hell. Poor Okano-chan~"

"Nakamura! What's that supposed to mean!? And FYI, my girl allowed me to go!" Wolf whistles (and an embarrassed squeak from Okano) erupted when Maehara hugged Okano close to his side, his face bright red and proud even as Okano twisted his ear and complained that they weren't supposed to tell until their first anniversary. Maehara only kissed her on the cheek, and that sent half the girls into cheers and loud complaints from the guys who said it was unfair. "Well, suck it up, 'cause Okano and I are a couple now!"

"Even you can do better than this, Okano-san."

"Hey!"

"What the heck, this place is crawling with couples," Okajima bemoaned, words hitting almost too close to home. Manami and Karma shared a look. "This makes me sick."

Had Okajima or anybody else found them instead of Okano and Maehara, she couldn't help wondering what would've happened. What would have Karma said? What would have she said? How were their classmates going to interpret it? It's all too easy to say it was none of anyone's business, but…

In the end, she knew that there is no use in thinking of what is not happening.

Because Karma would never put them in an unfavorable position, and because he knows she will never give him something so disrespectful such as halfhearted feelings when faced by outside confrontation. They'd promised they'd take it slow, and she trusted him, just as he trusted in her.

Here, in the underwhelming reality that they remain undiscovered as they hold hands in the shadow of everyone's backs, away from the spotlight of Okano and Maehara's very new relationship, Karma is too busy heckling Maehara to notice Manami squeezing his hand. There are some things she's certain of: she's still not quite brave enough to twine their fingers together, but she is brave enough to admit to herself that she wanted to.

She really, really, really wanted to.


 

Notes:

19.07.2023
hello! for anyone still kindly checking in on this fic, this is to confirm i am discontinuing this work. i've been contemplating this for a long time, and i thought it was time to let it go for two reasons:

- im no longer in the right headspace to write for this setting
- i've forgotten which direction i want to take this fic (and the series as a whole)

i'll be re-editing & rewriting a few chapters so it's a bit more polished than it currently is. this series is not up for adoption, nor will i allow requests to continue where this fic might have gone. thank you for understanding.

i loved writing this series, and im glad this is still getting comments & readers every now & then, but i've moved on from it. so, thank you, reader, for being here. ❤️

Series this work belongs to: