Chapter Text
John and Sherlock were on a cab on their way to meet the rest of the group to celebrate Sherlock’s birthday with cake. Molly and Lestrade will meet the at the place. The drive had been very silent so far. Careless, John took his phone and pretended he was interested in something. It was a poor excuse to give his friend the chance to text a certain woman. John’s lips twitched upwards in a smile he hide from his friend when he saw Sherlock taking his phone out of his pocket and beginning to text.
Everyone talked and laughed for the most part of the gathering. After the cake was over and the conversation turn more and more common, Sherlock began to struggle with the uneasy feeling of having to socialize.
It was an unfortunate moment for the text to arrive, the laughs died and the moan of the alert sounded loud so everyone near hear it. Sherlock pretended nothing unusual had happened, John smiled broadly, while Molly and Lestrade were shocked
“You still have that text alert?” Asked Molly a bit disgusted as Sherlock took his phone, he didn’t answered the question.
“Do you and Miss Adler have plans for dinner tonight?” Asked John.
“Maybe,” Sherlock said, letting out a sigh, looking distracted. “Well, it’s been a-”
“Who is Miss Adler?” Asked Lestrade
“Sherlock’s girlfriend” Answered John.
“Sherlock has a girlfriend?” Asked Molly a bit shocked.
“She is not my girlfriend” Complained Sherlock.
“How long has this been going on?” Insisted Molly.
“Five years, i think. Right Sherlock?” John was mocking.
“She is not my girlfriend”
“Are you telling me, for the past five years I have been asking you what’s new and you never thought to go with Sherlock has a girlfriend?” Lestrade seemed a bit insulted.
“She is not my girlfriend!!”
“How did you both meet?” Asked Molly.
“On a case.” Sherlock answered exasperated.
“Yes, she was naked, then she drugged him and beat him with a riding crop” John was having the time of his life.
“What?! Really?!” Asked Molly and Lestrade at the same time.
“All right, everyone pay attention. Yes, I have a friend named Irene Adler. Yes, she is a female. Yes, we communicate on a daily basis. Yes, we misbehave sometimes, but no, she is not my girlfriend.” Stated Sherlock firmly.
“Fine then,” Said John chuckling. “What you communicate about?
"well, my work as a detective, her work as a Dominatrix and most recently the possibility of us having a child together” Everyone on the table lost their shit at the comment. Everyone on the table choke with their last piece of cake at Sherlock’s words. Sherlock took his opportunity, he stand up and continue, “We’ll name him Hamish, John’s suggestion by the way. Now if you excuse me, i have a dinner to attend.”
“But, ” began Molly hesitating. “You just ate cake, are you really hungry?”
“Yes, i just ate cake so, no, i’m not hungry”
“Why would you want dinner if you’re not hungry?” Asked Lestrade in confusion.
“Exactly.” Said Sherlock with a triumphant smile. “Thanks for the cake, good evening”