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Yuuri had woken up just to the realize that he was going to be late.
He threw on some clothes that happened to be the closest to him, picked his glasses up from the kitchen table where he apparently had left them for some reason, and left his small apartment by slamming the door behind him.
The neighbor lady who was taking a garbage bag outside glared at him. Yuuri made an apologetic gesture with his hands, but had no time to actually receive the complains from the noisy old woman.
By the time he was at the entrance of the university he had the chance to sigh. He could make it. Yuuri rushed inside, and walked through the corridor where the hallway started, when he heard someone speaking.
“Hi,” the male voice said.
That voice belonged to the man who was walking to the opposite direction to where Yuuri was going to. Just before they crossed, Yuuri decided to actually say something back. The hallway was empty, so he obviously was not talking to anyone else. Also, those eyes were on him, sharp and alert.
“Hi,” Yuuri greeted quietly and shied away.
It was Viktor Nikiforov, and Yuuri had no idea why he was talking to him. They had never exchanged even a single word. Viktor had never even looked at Yuuri’s direction, and Yuuri…well, maybe he had noticed the other man. Honestly, it would have been weird not to. Everyone’s attention were always on this person, Yuuri was just one of the many.
Today his long silvery hair was pulled into a ponytail. There was something scary about beautiful people. Yuuri never really knew where to look at.
When they passed each other Yuuri kept his eyes on the floor. He had walked only a couple of steps when he heard now a little more familiar voice saying.
“Uhm.”
Yuuri peaked over his shoulder.
Viktor was standing there, turned to Yuuri. He just…stood there. His mouth opened, closed, and he shook his head. Then he turned away mumbling, “Sorry.”
There was something strange about Viktor on that day. Usually, he shone brightly even in the middle of the masses. Uncertainty and gloomy mood surprised even Yuuri.
When Yuuri saw the clock on the wall he cursed and started running to the lecture hall. Now, he was definitely late.
Yuuri hated being late at Mrs. Baranovskaya’s lectures. She never said anything, just stared disapprovingly whenever someone walked into their seat. Thankfully five minutes after Yuuri had walked in, Georgi sheepishly made his way to the front row. The anger that had been directed to Yuuri shifted.
After the lecture he headed to the cafeteria, for he had had no time to eat in the morning. He sent a quick text to Phichit where he was going, knowing that the other was going to ask anyway soon.
Without thinking much he picked something from the selection of snacks and sat down to the table next to the window. It was winter but most of the snow had melted away. Though, this week everything had seemed to have frozen again, as if Spring had decided to change his mind from arriving early. Clear sky blessed the day with sunshine. Yuuri stared outside in daze.
He was startled by Phichit sliding to the seat on the other side of the table.
“Have you heard?” he asked eyes shining.
“Probably not,” Yuuri said and turned his attention back to the half-eaten sandwich.
His friend always had the new take on the hottest rumors of the uni. Honestly, the boy was the Varys of the natural science department. If someone had been caught doing something unsanitary in the fine arts building’s toilet, Phichit would know. If one would decide to bring his sick dog to the lectures without a permission, Yuuri would have already heard about it.
“According to rumors, someone saw Viktor Nikiforov cry in the E building’s staircase.”
Yuuri looked up, “What?”
“I know, right,” Phichit said with a voice which sounded nothing like him. It happened sometimes when he got worked up.
Well, Viktor had been looking a little distressed earlier. Yuuri just hoped nothing was actually wrong. But if he had been crying, Yuuri could not help thinking that maybe the other had needed some help.
“Yuuri?” Phichit asked, seeing his friend going quiet.
“Was he really crying?” Yuuri frowned.
“Well, so I heard,” Phichit shrugged and leaned on the table.
Yuuri tried to erase the image from his mind. It was not really his business.
It had been half an hour since he had talked with Phichit when his phone buzzed. He answered the call. Phichit started to talk before Yuuri even managed to say hi.
“Update, someone said that Viktor has definitely been crying. He was seen sitting in the back of the lecture hall, his eyes all red and puffy.”
“Where did you hear this from?” Yuuri could not help wondering.
“Doesn’t matter,” Phichit said, completely ignoring the question. “Some guessed that it might got something to do with the dog he had since he was a teenager.”
Yuuri desperately hoped that it got nothing to do with the cute dog Viktor had. Even he had seen some pictures of the furry bundle of joy by chance. It definitely reminded him of his own dog Vicchan back at his parent’s place.
Yuuri had to again remind himself that it was none of his business.
“Hey Phichit, is it okay to talk about things like this? Maybe it’s not really something that should be shared,” Yuuri muttered.
“But everyone’s talking about it. It’s not like I’ve been particularly chasing after the information. These things just come to me.”
“You’re a gossip magnet, and I know you enjoy it,” Yuuri shook his head.
“God help me, I do.”
Yuuri had finished the meeting of his group project in the one of the seminar rooms, and was about to have a break when Phichit sneaked behind him and threw his arm over Yuuri’s shoulder.
He shifted his mouth close to Yuuri’s ear and whispered, “Someone broke his heart.”
“What, who, whose?” Yuuri narrowed his eyes.
“That’s why he was crying,” Phichit explained.
Ah, he was talking about Viktor.
“You're telling me that someone’s been toying with his emotions? Are we still talking about the same person?” It sounded like an unbelievable idea.
“Yeah, and this time it’s definitely a fact. I heard it from Guang Hong, who heard it from Leo, who was told by Mila, who was with Chris at the time when he was trying to get Viktor talk why he was acting so strange. You know Chris and Viktor are good friends. That’s all he got from him, though. Someone really crushed his hopes and dreams.”
“That’s horrible,” Yuuri said with a worried voice.
“I know. Who would do that to Viktor Nikiforov? Who could manage to do that to Viktor Nikiforov? I know that he usually flaunts around of university with pure confidence, but I’ve never seen him actually be with anyone. I think that’s why people are so confused. He doesn't wear a heart on his sleeve. Someone definitely did a number on him.”
Yuuri got quiet. Then he said, “I’m not sure if it’s right to hear these things. I really feel like we shouldn’t talk about someone’s private life.”
“But I can’t do anything about it that these things just come floating to me. What can I do when people like to tell me things?” Phichit said, smiling sheepishly.
“And then you tell everything to me. And for some reason, I’m the other person who knows everything about everything and everyone. It’s weird. Last month my eyes met with the history major who almost lost his leg because of that one unfortunate incidence with a norwegian transfer student and a waffle iron. I panicked, and I swear she knew that I knew. I felt so bad. You need to stop telling me these things, Phichit.”
“But I need to process these things with someone,” Phichit complained.
Yuuri sighed.
“And I know that you don’t go telling stuff forwards. It would be sin not to tell my best friend everything,” Phichit offered a crooked smile and playfully nudged Yuuri with his elbow.
“This is useless,” Yuuri said, defeated.
“Are you saying that you don’t want to know more, even if I hear something about Viktor?”
Yuuri winced. Who was he lying to? He did want to know. Damn it, Phichit. “I’m not saying that,” he ended up admitting.
“Busted,” Phichit snorted.
Phichit looked crestfallen when they met in the corridor.
“What’s wrong?” Yuuri asked right away.
“Am I a bad person?” Phichit asked, his shoulders hunched.
“What? No, of course not. Who told you that,” Yuuri demanded.
“No one,” Phichit said. “I just, I feel so bad.”
Yuuri’s eyebrows rose.
“What did you do?”
“Maybe…” Phichit bit his lower lip, “I asked Chris about Viktor.”
Oh Phichit.
“You really did that?”
“He was right in front of me – Chris. Viktor wasn’t there. It’s just kind of came out.”
“What happened?” Yuuri encouraged his friend to continue.
“He didn’t really seem bothered about the question till he turned to me. Then his face suddenly became murderous and he said something along the lines of: ‘What’s it for you. It’s none of your business.’” Phichit shrugged. “It’s just hit me that maybe I was going too far. I was, wasn’t I?”
“I’ve been warning you about being nosy for years,” Yuuri reminded with a gentle voice.
“I know, but you’re my friend. And you can say those things and I don’t necessary have to take everything seriously. I just, I feel like an idiot. It really isn’t my business, is it?”
Yuuri huffed and said, “Come on. I’ll buy you a coffee from the vending machine.”
“Yuuri! You’re the best. I love you,” Phichit announced with teary eyes.
And suddenly Yuuri’s arms were full of his best friend. He could not help letting the bubbly laughter out.
Yuuri patted Phichit back and said “Let’s go."
Yuuri had been on his way to the library, and for some reason he had walked into Viktor. The man had been standing just outside the library, looking out of it. He was staring at the trees shadowing one of the windows. This person was definitely something else, wearing his long dark blue coat, hair softly falling over his winter scarf. It was not the first time Yuuri thought that Viktor was out of this word, something impossible to reach.
Yuuri was about to make his way to the building. Then Viktor noticed Yuuri. And for Yuuri’s surprise, Viktor’s did not look away from him. He just stood there, his eyes glued on Yuuri. And honestly, as the rumors said, Viktor Nikiforov looked really sad.
Viktor tightened his lips together and his lower lip trembled. He looked lost. Something about it made it impossible to look away. It was probably none of Yuuri’s business to stuck his nose into Viktor’s personal life. Yuuri glanced at the library door, before making the decision he had failed to make this morning.
“Are you okay?” Yuuri stopped walking, and said carefully.
The man seemed startled. “I–,” Viktor blinked. Then he muttered, “No, I’m not.”
It did not sound like Viktor was afraid to confess it, rather, it felt like ‘you got a problem with that’ was left unsaid, but it was still very much implied.
The sudden aggression was surprising. Yuuri could have never imagined seeing this person making such a face. Something must definitely be wrong.
“Is something wrong? Are you hurting?”
“Really?” Viktor sounded bitter. His eyes had narrowed slightly. Viktor looked sad, but also angry.
And maybe Viktor had a point. It had been a stupid question. Clearly, he was not fine. But it did seem strange that this person who Yuuri had seen just yesterday in the cafeteria laughing loudly and gathering the attention of the whole room, has gotten this affected by someone.
“I just wanted to help. You looked like you were about to…” Yuuri tried to find the right words.
“You think I look pitiful?” Viktor’s shoulders tensed. His voice was hoarse.
“No, of course not,” Yuuri said as fast as he could.
Viktor’s eyes looked big and vulnerable. He seemed to be struggling with something, as for a second he closed his eyes shut tight, before opening them again.
“You’re seriously trying to comfort me, now?” Viktor looked astounded.
“I shouldn’t?” Yuuri blurted out.
Maybe it was not Yuuri’s place after all. Somehow, he was managing to make Viktor feel even worse. It was obvious from the reaction he seemed to be getting.
Bitter laughter died as soon as it started. It was like the anger had disappeared, and all that was left behind was the distress.
“No, it's not that. You do what you want. I’m just,” Viktor said, looking like he was suddenly on the verge of tears. ”I just thought that…” he shook his head and stopped the words as if trying to gather himself together.
Yuuri had no idea what to do. How could he help? Maybe he should get someone Viktor knew. Chris maybe. “I’m sorry,” Yuuri ended up saying.
“And now he’s telling me he’s sorry,” Viktor muttered to himself. His eyes really were puffy
“I don’t know what to do,” Yuuri confessed. If the other would just tell him how to help, who to get there for him, anything.
“Well, you definitely had no problem earlier,” Viktor glared at Yuuri. His fists were clenched.
Yuuri furrowed his eyebrows. Had he done something in the morning? All he had done was say ‘hi’.
“Have I done something?” Yuuri said and pushed a wisp of hair behind his ear, as he awkwardly stood there.
Viktor’s eyes got wide. He searched something in Yuuri, but Yuuri had no idea what it could be.
“Viktor?” he tried.
Viktor frowned. “At least you got the name right.”
Okay, there’s definitely something there that Yuuri was not getting.
“What did I do?" he ended up uttering. The frustration aimed at him seemed awfully personal.
“Why are you acting like this?” Viktor suddenly demanded with a raised voice. “Is this some kind of a joke? Are you having fun? Because honestly, I’m not.”
“I don’t understand.”
“What the fuck is there to understand?! What in this is so confusing?”
Yuuri could not follow any of this. None of Viktor’s words made any sense. Why was he shouting at Yuuri?
“I have no idea what you mean, just tell me what have I done to you, because honestly, I can’t name a single thing!”
Viktor looked shocked, then his face turned stormy.
“You kissed me!” he shouted so that it echoed in the yard.
“I what?” was all Yuuri got out.
“You kissed me, it was my first.” Viktor seemed to be surprised of his following confession. He nervously brushed some strand of hairs from his face.
Yuuri just stared. He had trouble in comprehending what Viktor had just said.
“Fuck.” Viktor lowered his head. “I can’t believe this is happening.”
And Viktor was not the only one.
Were they talking about him? Yuuri tried to recall of any memory of him making out with Viktor – Viktor Nikiforov, but he felt like he would most likely know if he had, right? Who would forget something like that? Even he had had times when he had been lost staring at this man at the campus, too intimidated to actually ever approach, but incapable to look away.
“You! You behave like nothing’s wrong, like nothing happened – nothing. Like it was nothing. Like it was… You – oh no, oh my god,“ eyes were tearing up. “I fell for a player.”
“For who?” Yuuri was definitely missing something to follow this conversation.
“I can’t believe I fell for it. You just act like you don’t even know me. You’re really so over this that you can’t even properly look me in the eye when we cross in the hallway?” Viktor sobbed.
“What are you talking about?” Yuuri was starting to feel desperate. This all went over his head.
“Why are you acting like this? You were so sweet yesterday. You told me you think I’m beautiful, and that you adore my hair and that – ,“ Viktor’s voice broke in the mid-sentence.
Yuuri listened Viktor’s words in daze.
“I did?”
Wait, yesterday?
Viktor sniffled. “I don’t appreciate people mocking me. You lied to my face. I didn’t know you were this cruel, Yuuri. I feel like an idiot.” He used his sleeve to wipe the tears away but new ones kept covering his cheeks.
Panicking, Yuuri said the first thing that came to him, “I do think you’re beautiful. I just would never have the courage to tell you that.”
Viktor frowned.
“What are you playing at? You told me those things really easily, in fact, amongst many other things.”
Yuuri was left without words, again.
“Now I see that I wasn’t anything special, after all. You do this often, Yuuri? Huh? Just find someone who pleases the eye, flirt a bit, whisper sweet things and then forget it all,” Viktor spat the words out.
When Yuuri was too baffled to even answer, something changed in Viktor’s eyes.
“How many are there? Do they always fall for it this easily? Or maybe they are just smart enough to realize what you really mean when you tell them that you could see yourself falling in love with them.” He paused. “Don’t tell me, you’re dating someone?”
Yuuri did not answer, for he was still questioning if this was the reality, Viktor seemed to take that as a yes.
“Maybe the boy who is always close to you? The one kept touching you in the middle of the hallway today?” Viktor looked fed up, his eyes still glistening.
“You mean Phichit?” Yuuri said in confusion.
“I see, you’re close.” Viktor sounded angry.
“Well yeah, he’s my best friend.”
Something flashed in Viktor’s eyes “He’s not…?” he said hesitantly.
“He's my best friend,” Yuuri ensured, still not sure why he had to do something like that.
“Oh.” There was a small sigh that Viktor seemed to try not to let show.
There was something fascinating to witness it. Part of Yuuri was still having an inner melt-down from the sudden interaction with the most admired person in the campus, and the other part was overly curious about all those different faces of Viktor that he had been able to see.
“Yuuri, you can’t just do this to people. You hurt me,” Viktor’s eyes were glazed as he talked softly. Some of the frustration had washed away. He looked tired.
Yuuri stopped for a second to think. According to Viktor, they had met yesterday, which made no sense because he had been home. He had finished the frustrating essay and handed it in in the last minute. He was not looking forward to hearing the grade.
Then, he remembered.
He had gone out yesterday. Yuuko and Takeshi had invited him to have a drink with them. And Yuuri, wanting desperately to forget the studying, had agreed. But no matter how much he loved his childhood friends, yesterday he had been tired of being the third wheel.
Yuuri tried to remember more, but all he got is how he had stood from the booth they had been sitting in and saying that he needed something stronger. But the rest of the night was blur. He could not even remember seeing either of the two after that.
Yuuri did not really drink much, but yesterday he had been really bummed out about the courses from hell that had made him feel like a failure. He remembered ordering a vodka tonic, wishing to find comfort in it.
“I did go out yesterday,” Yuuri stated slowly.
“Of course you did,” Viktor said baffled, as if Yuuri was stating the obvious.
Yuuri felt the confusion building up. What had happened yesterday? Just what had he done? He knew that sometimes when he drank too much he tended to go…a little wild, if pictures in Phichit’s phone had something to judge. Could it really be that he had actually come onto Viktor?
“Yesterday,” Yuuri swallowed. “I’m so so so sorry!” Yuuri said, making a 90-degree bow out of habit. Then he started to blabber, “I think I might have drunk too much. I honestly, don’t remember a thing. I’m so sorry. I apologize, I keep my distance, whatever you want. You won’t see me ever bothering you again.”
Viktor blinked, sniffling slightly. “What do you mean?”
Yuuri straightened his back but felt afraid to look up.
“I forgot! I completely forgot I even went out yesterday. And it had been pretty long since I’ve been in a bar. I must have been over-drinking, and out of my mind. Obviously, since I actually s-stole a kiss from you” Yuuri felt the embarrassment getting to him. Why had he been such a fool? “Not that someone wanting to do it would have to be drunk. I bet a lot of people would want to,” he stopped himself when he realized what he was saying. He was such a shameful person. Someone, just let him out of his misery already.
Viktor’s teary eyes had become sober. His eyebrows were still furrowed, in confusion, but now he clearly was listening Yuuri closely.
“Clearly, I made you feel uncomfortable. I can’t believe myself,” Yuuri groaned. He wanted to disappear.
After a moment, Viktor said, “I was really in the favor, of that kiss. There was nothing really to be stolen.”
Yuuri felt himself blushing. It was official, he had made out with Viktor Nikifovor. He wanted to slap himself when he realized that part of him felt disappointed for not remembering it happening.
Viktor took a step forward, Yuuri automatically one back.
“Why are you so embarrassed? You act so weird,” Viktor pondered. He was still sniffling slightly.
“Oh my god, I probably made a huge fool out of myself,” Yuuri groaned.
“You literally swept me off my feet,” Viktor said slowly.
Yuuri snapped his head up, “I did- what?” Yuuri gaped, feeling the blush spreading down his neck.
“You asked me to dance, I said yes and we did. Then you offered me a drink,” Viktor was making his way to Yuuri as he talked, now looking more confident.
“I-I-,“ Yuuri stammered and backed off, till he was standing right in front of the front door of the library.
Viktor was close. His fingers reached to touch the tip of Yuuri’s left ear. “Then you..”
Yuuri gulped, Viktor never continued that sentence, instead he kept his eyes on Yuuri. Helplessly, Yuuri tried to look away from the taller man who was caging him with his body. The scent of Viktor’s cologne was over-powering, and strangely, somewhat familiar.
Viktor’s eyes were intense, when he said, “Your ears are red.”
K.O.
Yuuri lifted his hand up to hid his ear, but Viktor stopped it by taking a hold on Yuuri’s wrist.
“What are you doing?” Yuuri uttered.
“A pay back,” Viktor said, and pushed Yuuri against the door.
Before Yuuri was able to comprehend it, Viktor’s lips met his.
When they parted, Yuuri gasped for air.
“What is this with you, being all shy, acting so innocent.” Viktor pushed his leg between Yuuri’s legs, preventing any chance of escaping.
But the embarrassing fact was that he really did not want to be anywhere else. Making an escape plan was nowhere near the first priority, because here was Viktor, leaning close to him, eyes sharp.
Viktor thumb was under Yuuri’s chin when he tilted other’s head up.
“You’re wearing glasses,” he said thoughtfully.
“I always do,” Yuuri muttered.
Viktor hummed before saying, “You weren’t yesterday.”
He must have been really drunk. At least he had not lost them. Though, this explained why they were in the morning placed on the kitchen table instead of on his nightstand where he usually left them.
“You aren’t rejecting me,” Viktor said with wonder in his voice.
Who in their right minds would reject him, Yuuri was about to ask, but kept that thought to himself.
He felt Viktor’s heavy breathing the way the other hovered in his space.
“Wha-what is this?” Yuuri asked, feeling confused, and distractingly aroused.
A small grin appeared out of nowhere. “I already told you, a pay back.”
Yuuri’s eyes got wider when Viktor leaned for another kiss. He did not shove Viktor away, there was not really a reason to. It felt really good. Without realizing, his hands grabbed a hold of Viktor’s shirt’s hem, desperately clinging to the other.
He felt Viktor smile mid-kiss. When the kiss ended, Yuuri saw Viktor’s eyes. His pupils were blown wide. The sight of it made Yuuri feel dizzy.
Just what had he done last night? If this was what he got from it, he was starting to re-evaluate regretting it.
“I had no idea that you could blush this prettily. It makes me wonder how far it reaches,” Viktor said and reached to the collar of Yuuri’s shirt under of the open winter coat. Then he stretched the fabric with his forefinger to expose Yuuri’s collarbones.
Yuuri swatted his own hand over his chest, bringing the fabric back to its place, covering the skin again.
“I was just checking,” Viktor said innocently.
Yuuri was left without words. It seemed to be something that Viktor was really good at.
Viktor’s eyes softened. He leaned his head to rest it on Yuuri’s shoulder.
“You scared me, Yuuri,” he admitted.
Yuuri shivered, when he felt Viktor’s voice coming so close to his ear.
“When you just walked away this morning, I was sure you were ignoring me,” the man pouted.
Yuuri recalls the weird face Viktor had made in the hallway.
“You were like a stranger, and it broke me. I was trying to make sense of it. But you never came to talk to me. And we did not exchange numbers yesterday. You never came to me and...I got so confused. I waited the whole day, then I saw you hugging with someone and I felt like giving up,” Viktor confessed with a muffled voice.
“I still don’t remember,” Yuuri said helplessly.
“It seems so,” Viktor said slowly.
“Things like these does not really happen,” Yuuri admitted.
“You’re saying that you don’t usually spent your Thursday nights by seducing people?”
“Seducing?” the word felt unfamiliar to be associated with himself. “No!”
“Really?” Yuuri felt Viktor’s mouth move close to his pulse point.
“No,” Yuuri said. “I might have heard that I have the tendency to challenge people to dance battles, but this is the first time I’ve been blamed for…breaking anyone’s heart.” It felt embarrassing to even said it aloud. Phichit would never let it go if he heard about this.
“Is that so,” Viktor hummed, playing with Yuuri’s hair that had been getting longer than Yuuri himself preferred.
“Uhum,” Yuuri nodded, and swallowed.
Viktor planted a small kiss on his neck, which made Yuuri squeal. Just because of it, Viktor planted another one just where Yuuri’s jawline began.
“Um,” Yuuri said, “Viktor.”
“Yes?”
“What are you doing?”
“Seducing you.”
Then Viktor tilted his head so that he could meet Yuuri’s eye. Yuuri froze.
“What exactly did I say yesterday?” he said feeling unsure.
“All kind of things,” Viktor smirked.
Yuuri had no idea what that could mean.
“Don’t worry, Yuuri,” Viktor said. “I’m going to make you say them all over again.”
“Yuuri!” Phichit’s voice rang through the library. “You will never believe this. Someone saw Viktor kissing some guy senseless in…oh,” he stopped when he saw the man just mentioned sitting next to Yuuri.
He stared at his friend who looked startled. There was a hue of red covering his cheeks.
Then Phichit’s eyes focused on the linked hands displayed on the top of table. Yuuri was clearly trying to pull his hand away, but Viktor seemed to be firmly hold it in its place.
“Oh wow,” Phichit said as his eyes widened. Then he took a step back, covered his mouth and let out a shriek, “Yuuri! How scandalous!”